The Super Friendly Social and Love Advice Thread v3 - February
10,002 replies, posted
sorry if i had gotten a bit worked up. unrelated stuff was getting to me at the time of posting
yes, i did go through depression. i was diagnosed as major depressive (and was borderline suicidal though i never said a word about it) for about 5 years and went through a myriad of psychologists, psychiatrists, and medications for it. none of them helped. (i can't speak for the entire medical community but about half of the doctors i've seen were more interested in earning a profit off of my unhappiness than actually curing it.)
nothing worked for me until i started running regularly, eating better, and (most importantly) found a life goal to work forward to. while that's obviously not going to be the case for everybody and medication can help, a psychologist can do very little for you unless you're willing to change.
(also major depressive disorder is still only one form of depression, there are many other forms of depression)
[QUOTE=Jo The Shmo;36666391]i'm not being pedantic, I'm saying that you can't just self diagnose depression, which you said was perfectly fine[/QUOTE]
yes you cannot self-diagnose major depressive order, short-hand term depression, but you can realize that you are experiencing depression, a symptom, and think "hmm maybe i should go to the doctor".
and yes you are being pedantic because we're arguing around the term depression, even though we don't even disagree on anything.
[QUOTE=Guy Mannly;36666409]sorry if i had gotten a bit worked up. unrelated stuff was getting to me at the time of posting
yes, i did go through depression. i was diagnosed as major depressive (and was borderline suicidal though i never said a word about it) for about 5 years and went through a myriad of psychologists, psychiatrists, and medications for it. none of them helped. (i can't speak for the entire medical community but about half of the doctors i've seen were more interested in earning a profit off of my unhappiness than actually curing it.)
nothing worked for me until i started running regularly, eating better, and (most importantly) found a life goal to work forward to. while that's obviously not going to be the case for everybody and medication can help, a psychologist can do very little for you unless you're willing to change.[/QUOTE]
Then you of all people should know better than to belittle the '14 year olds' in the depression help thread.
[QUOTE=Guy Mannly;36666409]sorry if i had gotten a bit worked up. unrelated stuff was getting to me at the time of posting
yes, i did go through depression. i was diagnosed as major depressive (and was borderline suicidal though i never said a word about it) for about 5 years and went through a myriad of psychologists, psychiatrists, and medications for it. none of them helped. (i can't speak for the entire medical community but about half of the doctors i've seen were more interested in earning a profit off of my unhappiness than actually curing it.)
nothing worked for me until i started running regularly, eating better, and (most importantly) found a life goal to work forward to. while that's obviously not going to be the case for everybody and medication can help, a psychologist can do very little for you unless you're willing to change.[/QUOTE]
Personally I disagree a bit about that last part, a psychologist should not expect you to be willing to change but should try to make you willing. Medification - from personal experience and from what I have heard from pretty much everybody I've spoken to - doesn't directly do anything about depression unless the clear reason for your depression is due to physical reasons.
[QUOTE=Guy Mannly;36666409]sorry if i had gotten a bit worked up. unrelated stuff was getting to me at the time of posting
yes, i did go through depression. i was diagnosed as major depressive (and was borderline suicidal though i never said a word about it) for about 5 years and went through a myriad of psychologists, psychiatrists, and medications for it. none of them helped. (i can't speak for the entire medical community but about half of the doctors i've seen were more interested in earning a profit off of my unhappiness than actually curing it.)
nothing worked for me until i started running regularly, eating better, and (most importantly) found a life goal to work forward to. while that's obviously not going to be the case for everybody and medication can help, a psychologist can do very little for you unless you're willing to change.[/QUOTE]
okay why didn't you say that instead of randomly talking about 14 year olds and telling someone it's their fault they are depressed?
[editline]7th July 2012[/editline]
[QUOTE=Jo The Shmo;36666391]
I feel like you calling my argument pedantic is just a way for you to dismiss what I'm saying[/QUOTE]
how am i dismissing you when i'm addressing everything you're saying?
because saying you intend to commit suicide before you're past puberty because "nobody cares about you and your life sucks" is extremely selfish
i didn't mean everyone in the thread.
either way, sorry. was angry about something else, took it out on depression thread etc.
[QUOTE=Guy Mannly;36666525]because saying you intend to commit suicide before you're past puberty because "nobody cares about you and your life sucks" is extremely selfish
i didn't mean everyone in the thread.[/QUOTE]
yeah okay but you're not doing anyone any good that way. having a go at depressed people for your own sake is just as selfish, innit?
[editline]7th July 2012[/editline]
[QUOTE=Guy Mannly;36666525]
either way, sorry. was angry about something else, took it out on depression thread etc.[/QUOTE]
exactly, so in what position are you to claim others are selfish?
I think we should call this thread 'argument central v1' instead of super friendly social and love advice.
its seith's fault
[QUOTE=Guy Mannly;36377263]so..
anyone here under the age of 20 who's talking about being an hero
sit tight, it's called puberty, it will pass.
[editline]18th June 2012[/editline]
yes it is. at the very least, just wait a few months before you do anything drastic. most people become significantly happier in their 20s, whereas almost all teens are troubled.
[editline]18th June 2012[/editline]
just wait a few years until you're in college or something. if you still feel that way then feel free to write "FUCK YOU GUY MANNLY YOU WERE WRONG" in your own blood or something before you do it.[/QUOTE]
if thats the post your talking about it really doesnt seem so bad to me
It's always easier to be the victim and blame everyone than admit it's your own choice.
[QUOTE=Seith;36667099]It's always easier to be the victim and blame everyone than admit it's your own choice.[/QUOTE]
is that an analogy for your advice or are you talking about depression
It's not an analogy, it's real life. Also, I never talked about depression, I was and am talking about self-victimization which may resort to depression.
Depression is a last-resort word I only refer to when I talk to a person which all efforts on his part and mine failed to change that behavior.
[QUOTE=Seith;36667099]It's always easier to be the victim and blame everyone than admit it's your own choice.[/QUOTE]
I think people react in two ways (maybe others?). Some people just blame everybody else, gets generally pissy and mad at people around. Others blame themselves, and cower in, become shy and lose contact to the world around. I think most people do the ladder.
Blaming yourself, admitting it's 'your own fault' or whatever isn't a motivation for most people to get better. Someone who is depressed (most likely) isn't going to think "Oh well I suck ass and it's all my fault, better bring myself together and make a change".
I truly believe that in order for someone to TRULY change it needs to come from him, from the inside.
By comforting them, I just feed them everytime they are in trouble instead of giving them the tools and understanding that they can change themselves and be who the fuck the want to be.
im not gonna comment on the whole self-diagnosis of depression thing but your "tools and understanding" are completely useless to someone with genuine depression
[QUOTE=Seith;36667262]I truly believe that in order for someone to TRULY change it needs to come from him, from the inside.
By comforting them, I just feed them everytime they are in trouble instead of giving them the tools and understanding that they can change themselves and be who the fuck the want to be.[/QUOTE]
but you are the opposite of comforting
youre a cold robot
[QUOTE=Jo The Shmo;36667313]but you are the opposite of comforting
youre a cold robot[/QUOTE]
It's really weird thinking about a cold robot feeding people.
Really great choice of words seith :v:
[QUOTE=Kopimi;36667305]im not gonna comment on the whole self-diagnosis of depression thing but your "tools and understanding" are completely useless to someone with genuine depression[/QUOTE]
No shit Sherlock???? To clarify, when someone tells me he takes drugs to control depression I keep my mouth shut unless he wants tips on how to get off them.
[QUOTE=Seith;36667262]I truly believe that in order for someone to TRULY change it needs to come from him, from the inside.[/QUOTE]
Ofcourse, but people around can help spark that will.
[QUOTE=Protocol7;36667326]It's really weird thinking about a cold robot feeding people.
Really great choice of words seith :v:[/QUOTE]
oh shut up (you and jo) it's 1:39 am here.
i go bed
[editline]7th July 2012[/editline]
[QUOTE=MrJazzy;36667337]Ofcourse, but people around can help spark that will.[/QUOTE]
Nobody said it wasn't allowed to have people around.
[QUOTE=Seith;36667343]oh shut up (you and jo) it's 1:39 am here.
i go bed[/QUOTE]
Clear your mind, when you awake in the morning I hope you have fresh disposition on life that can carry you to endless fields of satisfaction.
[sp]/seith[/sp]
I'm joking btw :v:
beep boop - seith 2012
hey i think i already said this, but people can't snap themselves out of a depression in an instant if they have a depressive disorder.
[QUOTE=thisispain;36667364]hey i think i already said this, but people can't snap themselves out of a depression in an instant if they have a depressive disorder.[/QUOTE]
i think the point everyone's making is in a lot of cases depression is self-diagnosed and hence bullshit malarky
HOLY SHIT JACKPOT BABE
[QUOTE=Seith;36667440]HOLY SHIT JACKPOT BABE[/QUOTE]
did he break
[QUOTE=Jo The Shmo;36667446]did he break[/QUOTE]
*it
[QUOTE=thisispain;36667364]hey i think i already said this, but people can't snap themselves out of a depression in an instant if they have a depressive disorder.[/QUOTE]
Finally someone that makes sense. Not being sarcastic but agreeing with you.
I was already losing faith in this thread when I read responses like "the power to get out of depression is within you!". Spoken like a true Kung Fu Master from a crappy Kung Fu movie.
It's darn easy to sit and give opinions and pass judgment on depressive people. Everybody's like "do this, do that, and you'll be ok". Doesn't work like that. And that's not even giving advice. Might as well go serve soup to the poor so you can fill another bowl with your spoon and yell "NEXT!".
Nobody wants to hear that when they seek advice. That's bullshit. And once again one of the main problems in Seith's posts and some other users.
It's someone that has a problem, comes here, expresses it and then someone gives the most banal and generalistic advice instead of focusing on the person itself, without asking questions and without caring for that situation in specific instead of treating it like any other general stuff that usually have this magic formula to get out from. And thus the real frustrating and anoying thing, specially for the ones seeking advice, is that they get a formula instead of what they seek.
Stop posting formulas, and start giving advice.
Talking about depression, yes the trick is to get out there. But the problem with that is that depressed people don't want to get out there. They just don't start being happy just by snapping a finger. They need to be heard, they need friends, help and ADVICE.
Thank you.
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