The Super Friendly Social and Love Advice Thread v3 - February
10,002 replies, posted
Nyeh, sometimes dreams are interesting. Even other people's. I don't tell other people about my dreams if I know they're only interesting to me.
[QUOTE=x_xPwntx_x;37513828]Well... Crap... That's extremely complex. Know anyone who knows her?[/QUOTE]
Nope. Nobody I know knows about her either. All I can think of is just wait for an opportunity and then ask for her age, maybe compliment her for looking young (I'm guessing she's like 16-15 but could be just as well 17) and spark the conversation from there. I just can't find an opening for now.
I had a super vivid dream that my best friend apoligized for all the pain shes caused me and started talking to me again. I was so happy... all I want is to talk to her agian and my subconcious mind gave me what I wanted for just a few minutes before I was ripped back to reality. I woke up in this shit apartment hungry and with no food. First time ive cried in a while. I just cant accept that shes gone, this would be easier if she were dead. It torments me all the fucking time, Im sorry if this is a pointless post but Im just so sick of feeling like this.
i had a dream once where i held a girl's hand
I once had a dream where I had sex with a girl.
Didn't enjoy my morning I'll end it with that.
did you guys not get the part where practically no-one wants to hear about other people's dreams
I fucking LOVE dreaming and I don't bore people with my inane dreams unless they want to know (guess how often that happens)
How thoughtful of you
[QUOTE=redBadger;37522210]I once had a dream where I had sex with a girl.
Didn't enjoy my morning I'll end it with that.[/QUOTE]
i had a dream like that when i was like 12 and when i woke up my dad was sitting next to the bed with his head in his hands
[QUOTE=JgcxCub;37521341]Nyeh, [/QUOTE]
wat
[editline]3rd September 2012[/editline]
[QUOTE=JgcxCub;37520929]This has happened to me before, and it hurts. It's like their memory of the friendship has been wiped and you're a total stranger to them once again. Never understood why they never explain, no matter how gently I treat the subject (none of our mutual friends know either).[/QUOTE]
maybe they just get bored of you, i don't know how else to explain it. usually after a while of knowing someone i'll run out of things to talk about and lose interest in discussing things with them because their responses become predictable
alternatively she might have something else going on in her life
[editline]3rd September 2012[/editline]
[QUOTE=G3rman;37519317]Physical actions can only display so much, words and the weight we put on their meanings are just as important in displaying how we feel about a person.
Words can be pretty significant.[/QUOTE]
everyone has their own definition of love and some people take it much more lightly than others. telling someone not to say it if they don't mean it is pointless because they may believe what they feel is "love" when they're just infatuated and will be over the person within a few months.
both people in a relationship might not have the same definition of love. furthermore, the idea of "true love" is heavily romanticized and everyone would like to think they experience it. we only have so many words to convey that sort of feeling, but the meanings behind actions are generally a bit more universal. it's easy to say a four letter word but it's not easy to spend years in a relationship looking out for a person if you don't truly give a damn.
[B]Cautionary tale ahoy![/B]
I usually go out with a girl every summer.
It's not quite dating, never came to that, she's studying abroad and we barely see each other in person.
We just arrange something nice to do during summer when she's here. Last time we went for lunch, visited some nice places in the mountain near the coast and went to the beach. At the end we went for ice cream and had a pretty nice day.
As [I]date-ish[/I] as it may seem we do this to catch up and talk about everything.
We are friends, and I do care for her (I think the feeling is mutual because this time she was the one who came up with the initiative to seek me out to have this program). And frankly these "every year lunch and beach" thing is kind of becoming a tradition since we've been going out like this for 2 years, this being the second.
Now, I never had any intentions with here, mainly because we just don't see each other, but sometimes I think about it. And to be honest I once, like years ago, maybe 5 or so, I told her I liked her. Obviously she told me she didn't feel attracted to me, it was pretty awkward back then and I moved on. Funny thing is, she kept talking to me and we became friends.
5 years have passed now and we still like to see each other and she kinda wishes she could see me more often.
Now the real thing is this: She's studying, I'm studying. She's 1 year older than me (irrelevant), we pretty much enjoy each other's company (so it seems) but this is the kind of girl that is keen, and i mean an EXPERT on having relationships with the wrong guys. It's a thing that I see in most girls (not trying to be sexist here, cause I'm sure girls see some guys the same way, I'm just talking from the guy's perspective), and really disappoints me in her.
And when I say the wrong guys, it's not just from my point of view. I'm talking about from real fucked up people to guys that suddenly lost interest in her. I'll give you examples: during the time I've been friend with her, she's been with some guys that used her. She's been with an idiot she met during a metal concert that some months later was threatening to hit her (this was at the time I told her how I felt back then). Then, she's been with this skin-head guy who was having open relationships with other girls other than her, and she wasn't able to break up with him, then she passed on to a more normal guy, he seemed nice, hard working, they went for vacations a lot and travelled a lot together and then he just lost interest in her.
And now, last time we talked she told me about the breakup with this last guy. However she's been abroad and met some foreign dude, and I don't know how, they're into a relationship and it's serious. And I mean, she's with a guy she met during a week or two and it became a serious relationship at a very long distance. She won't be able to see him. And I mean, a distance from Spain to Holland, i guess.
Frankly I'd like to be with her more often, she's nice, smart, good looking... And yes, her business is her own, but I can't help but feel a little frustrated for her, because she seems to rush in to that "mysterious elusive guy who she may not see again because he makes her work for it". And seeing girls pursuing that thing makes me feel disappointed because that idea is attractive. I mean who wouldn't feel crazy about someone nice they may lose, right?
However she's rushing in. As a friend I advised her about it, but didn't want to say she was doing something wrong. She is not thinking and she's leading herself solely from emotion. It kinda frustrates me because she's a real intelligent and rational girl... except when it comes to the pursuit of love.
This frustration obviously comes from me, because knowing she has a boyfriends, even if it's someone she'll have a slim chance with, and this irrational attraction towards "bad boys" and "mysterious people" makes me lose a little interest in her and quit my pursuit of getting to know her.
I really don't know if she has even the slightest feelings for me. I'm attractive too. I moved on, been with my share of crazy girls myself, girls are interested in me.
But really, this frustrates me. I don't know. I'd love to spend more time with her, but right now romantically her head's on the clouds and It sucks. Should I call her to meet, or should I focus on my life and move the fuck on. I really don't know.
[QUOTE=Guy Mannly;37523310]
maybe they just get bored of you, i don't know how else to explain it. usually after a while of knowing someone i'll run out of things to talk about and lose interest in discussing things with them because their responses become predictable
alternatively she might have something else going on in her life[/QUOTE]
Nope, can't be.
a) It was far too sudden for that. As in, we were having really interesting conversations the day before. The next, radio silence. As fast as one day. No explanation.
b) I make a lot of mistakes, and I've been called many things, but one of the things I've never been called is "boring". People don't tend to get bored around me unless I'm being really quiet and it's just us two. If they do, it's often factors outside of anyone's control.
Everytime I'm about to have sex in my dreams something happens to stop it, normally someone walks into the room or I can't find a secluded spot.
[QUOTE=JgcxCub;37524675]Nope, can't be.
a) It was far too sudden for that. As in, we were having really interesting conversations the day before. The next, radio silence. As fast as one day. No explanation.
b) I make a lot of mistakes, and I've been called many things, but one of the things I've never been called is "boring". People don't tend to get bored around me unless I'm being really quiet and it's just us two. If they do, it's often factors outside of anyone's control.[/QUOTE]
your points are both really bias things that can only be explained from your perspective. i don't know you or your friend(s), but there's every chance that the "really interesting conversations" you were having weren't at all interesting to him/her and that once they were over they thought to themselves "maybe i don't want to be involved with this anymore" and cut contact
for example, i have a friend who talks and talks and talks and talks about things. these things tend to interest me; films, games, etc. the way in which we talk is fine because we're both massive nerds, but he'll talk in this way to anyone. he will talk loudly and at length and get worked up and interrupt people a lot, whether it's about these things or something else. no one would ever call him 'boring' and no one would ever be rude to him and make it obvious they're not interested or they don't care. but then they might stop answering him one day or might not seek his conversation. i can imagine my friend saying the exact two points you just made
i don't mean to be mean but this kinda thing is a possibility
[QUOTE=JgcxCub;37524675]Nope, can't be.
a) It was far too sudden for that. As in, we were having really interesting conversations the day before. The next, radio silence. As fast as one day. No explanation.[/QUOTE]
any chance you said something to offend her?
also, like chestymcgee said, "boring" is subjective.
Going to start trying to get girls numbers by just talking to them after watching some of Simplepickup's tips (I hope facepunch doesn't hate them.)
Just wondering, if things fall into awkward silence, is it alright to bring it up for a laugh?
"Well that got silent fast." HAHAHASHAHFHGSGSGFDS
[QUOTE=ChestyMcGee;37525153]your points are both really bias things that can only be explained from your perspective. i don't know you or your friend(s), but there's every chance that the "really interesting conversations" you were having weren't at all interesting to him/her and that once they were over they thought to themselves "maybe i don't want to be involved with this anymore" and cut contact
for example, i have a friend who talks and talks and talks and talks about things. these things tend to interest me; films, games, etc. the way in which we talk is fine because we're both massive nerds, but he'll talk in this way to anyone. he will talk loudly and at length and get worked up and interrupt people a lot, whether it's about these things or something else. no one would ever call him 'boring' and no one would ever be rude to him and make it obvious they're not interested or they don't care. but then they might stop answering him one day or might not seek his conversation. i can imagine my friend saying the exact two points you just made
i don't mean to be mean but this kinda thing is a possibility[/QUOTE]
I understand what you mean, hence both points. Maybe people do get bored with me. I never said it was impossible. Even if I try my best to stay interesting, I might not always be so.
Doesn't get round the fact that there was a VERY sudden change.
If it had been due to us drifting apart, we would habe been drifting apart before that. Yet in both of these cases, we were talking a hell of a lot right up until time zero.
[editline]3rd September 2012[/editline]
[QUOTE=Guy Mannly;37525215]any chance you said something to offend her?[/QUOTE]
Probably not, because she would have almost certainly have said something or at LEAST reacted differently.
[QUOTE=ThePinkPanzer;37526629]Going to start trying to get girls numbers by just talking to them after watching some of Simplepickup's tips (I hope facepunch doesn't hate them.)
Just wondering, if things fall into awkward silence, is it alright to bring it up for a laugh?
"Well that got silent fast." HAHAHASHAHFHGSGSGFDS[/QUOTE]
no, please don't
i don't see why it's so hard for people to just hold a conversation with someone
granted it's someone you most likely have never met before, but there's no need for any kind of routine or anything like that
I am just asking because I want to know if that is a no zone or not. Not like I will set in stone I will say that just in case.
sorry that rant wasn't directed at you, just in general
just don't let that awkward silence happen
No I wouldn't, just talk about something else. There isn't much you can say after making it obvious there's a silent moment.
Thanks guys for not caring about my post :v:
[QUOTE=ThePinkPanzer;37526629]"Well that got silent fast." HAHAHASHAHFHGSGSGFDS[/QUOTE]
just a tip, being meta about the conversation is a good way to annoy people fast
[QUOTE=Behemoth_PT;37527496]Thanks guys for not caring about my post :v:[/QUOTE]
i read it, is it really necessary for us to rate/comment on everything written in the thread?
[QUOTE=Guy Mannly;37527999]i read it, is it really necessary for us to rate/comment on everything written in the thread?[/QUOTE]
No. The :v: at the end suggested it. I am kidding.
Going to go in twenty.
My biggest fear is the fact that I am going to a movie with some friends, and thus everyone will be going somewhere with friends or will be some one I know who will humiliate me to their friends (because everyone here is really fucking hostile to me) when I ask for a number. Help?
is there someone in particular you're hoping to get a number from, or just ANY number?
Any number, I am trying more to just stop being so awkward around girls more than anything.
GAH! I'm having relationship problems because she thinks Im too perfect for her! And all I do is give her love and support, but she still has a problem being with me because apparently I'm "perfect", no matter how much I try to prove her wrong, and she's "damaged and corrupted" so she doesn't deserve me.
I'm having problems because Im "Too good"..... I mean COME ON
[QUOTE=ThePinkPanzer;37528921]Any number, I am trying more to just stop being so awkward around girls more than anything.[/QUOTE]
unfortunately that just makes you sound a bit desperate, and if people think that you are like that they're less likely to give you their number. everybody wants to be wanted, and not just "oh sure, you'll do"
I can hardly start a conversation without going into a mad stutter and sweating like a cow, I am hoping just by getting out and talking to girls I will at least break that.
[editline]3rd September 2012[/editline]
AKA I am trying to get over my fear of women.
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