The Super Friendly Social and Love Advice Thread v3 - February
10,002 replies, posted
[QUOTE=ChestyMcGee;37773159]yeh seriously there are only three outcomes to that question and none of them are that bad at all:
1. she says "no" and understands why you're asking her. now she'll know you're interested and if she's interested in you too this will boost her confidence in the situation
2. she says "no" and understands why you're asking her. you can ask her out and if she's not interested she'll tell you no and it's not the end of the world
3. she says "yes" and you can stop trying
she's on the rebound and you're either being used as a very close friend who can comfort her (and, with you being a guy, she gets the bonus of having male company) and/or she wants your willy in her
either way it sounds like you're being used a bit, whether she knows she's doing it or not[/QUOTE]
Nah, it's over 9 months ago, and I don't think I'm being used as a rebound, really. I'm not the eternal nice guy, we joke around a lot, and not necessarily always in a "nice" manner. We've been friends since before they broke up.
oh right. i guess you're just mates then and that's the end of that predicament
Okay.
[QUOTE=ChestyMcGee;37775245]oh right. i guess you're just mates then and that's the end of that predicament[/QUOTE]
I really can't gather whether you're just being sarcastic or not.
I should probably mention that this girl is pretty darn, erm, cautious would seem to be the word. Not in the socially awkward manner, though.
[QUOTE=JgcxCub;37769866]A way to ask someone if they have a boyfriend preferably without being too direct
Assuming that's necessary of course, if it doesn't matter that I'm direct then say so :)[/QUOTE]
honestly I used to be sly and ask shit like "so your boyfriend _____" but its so cheezy and obvious and awkward, just flat out ask if they have a boyfriend.
yeah and anyone with a functioning brain will see through it anyway
yeah honestly it's insulting to a woman's intelligence if you try and act sneaky about that sort of thing. usually it's pretty obvious if someone's crushing on you.
It wouldn't be something to ask right away. That would be pretty awkward. Still. Once you get to know the person a little better, it's only right to ask directly.
I learned during my ban that I don't want to be a cynical douche anymore despite it being far easier to act like that. What do?
[QUOTE=Taepodong-2;37777711]I learned during my ban that I don't want to be a cynical douche anymore despite it being far easier to act like that. What do?[/QUOTE]
looking at the post that got you banned, you should probably accept that you aren't going to get far unless you start taking action to make a better person out of yourself
it sounds cheesy but if i were you i'd take a glance at some things from here:
[url]http://inoveryourhead.net/100-tips-about-life/[/url]
also: don't blame the world, or the girls, or the assholes for your problems. don't blame anyone. not even yourself. just work on making things better.
I actually broke up with my GF of 7 months in July. It hurt alot but im learning to love myself and not NEED a woman in my life. :rock:
Wow. When I was coming back from getting food this couple got in the elevator and started making out as if to mock me for being alone. This shit isn't fucking helping, it's just making me more desperate and inducing more rage and stress.
woah calm down seriously
the problem is that you need to channel your stress and rage through ways that don't involve getting angry. paint, make music, write erotic fan-fics, do something instead of getting angry.
[QUOTE=thisispain;37778355]woah calm down seriously
the problem is that you need to channel your stress and rage through ways that don't involve getting angry. paint, make music, write erotic fan-fics, do something instead of getting angry.[/QUOTE]
Well I went back to my room and beat the shit out my pillow and other random shit instead of beating the shit out of the people responsible for pissing me off, does that count?
UGH you didn't even read what i wrote
instead of getting angry and flying into a rage you need to find something to channel your emotions into. now obviously you were raised or learned to deal with your emotions in only one way, beating or hitting something. this is unhealthy, both for you and for your possessions.
find something that interests you and put your energy into that. you'll relieve your stress and you'll be less likely to fly into fits of rage if you have an outlet.
if that doesn't work you might want to consider professional anger management
[QUOTE=thisispain;37778418]UGH you didn't even read what i wrote
instead of getting angry and flying into a rage you need to find something to channel your emotions into. now obviously you were raised or learned to deal with your emotions in only one way, beating or hitting something. this is unhealthy, both for you and for your possessions.
find something that interests you and put your energy into that. you'll relieve your stress and you'll be less likely to fly into fits of rage if you have an outlet.
if that doesn't work you might want to considering professional anger management[/QUOTE]
The thing is, most hobbies are too expensive for a university student with very little extra money. Hell, I can't even take out my anger on games because I couldn't bring my Xbox with me.
[QUOTE=GoDong-DK;37773157]So, there's this girl in my class - let's call her Miss C - and I'm fairly certain that she's into me. There's just the thing that I don't know how to take everything she says, writes and does. Yesterday, we chatted on facebook, and she just writes "PLEASE come to my birthday party and tell bad jokes that make everyone laugh", later she's talking about her ex and how she misses him - this can't really be taken as something in my favour - but then she turns around and says that, mind you this is fairly badly worded, that she needs a "replacement" (it was in a bit different manner, but she used the word). Now, we're quite close in class - we talk a lot, work together a lot, and we even massage eachother from time to time. I just don't know how to take this discourse.[/QUOTE]
If they broke up 9 months ago and she states that she misses then it implies that she doesn't know what she wants and is confused. You are being used as the determining factor for her. If things go right then you can be a better guy and you will be her replacement for him. It seems that she likes you enough already, so I don't see any harm in just grabbing and kissing her. (nicely of course)
Either that or basing it on the fact that she said she needs a replacement then she is vulnerable right now(which ties back in to what i said first) and you are going to cheer her up and bring her hope back. Either way, you must get a home run.
[QUOTE=Taepodong-2;37778392]Well I went back to my room and beat the shit out my pillow and other random shit instead of beating the shit out of the people responsible for pissing me off, does that count?[/QUOTE]
because someone was kissing near you, you flipped shit and started beating things? jesus
[QUOTE=Taepodong-2;37778487]The thing is, most hobbies are too expensive for a university student with very little extra money. Hell, I can't even take out my anger on games because I couldn't bring my Xbox with me.[/QUOTE]
then find a better job, or pick up a sport.
[QUOTE=NuclearAnnhilation;37778493]because someone was kissing near you, you flipped shit and started beating things? jesus[/QUOTE]
It felt like they were mocking me or something. I was seriously about ready to flip shit on them and tell them to have some fucking respect but I at least managed to keep myself calm long enough to get away from them.
[editline]23rd September 2012[/editline]
[QUOTE=thisispain;37778510]then find a better job, or pick up a sport.[/QUOTE]
Don't have a job and don't want one during the school year so I can focus on school. I work during the summer. And I'm fuck awful at anything that requires any degree of hand eye coordination, which is every sport.
did you know them or did you actually have a paranoid schizophrenic episode?
[quote]Don't have a job and don't want one[/quote]
get one. it'll force you to put your energies to good use and you'll have money for a hobby
[quote]I'm fuck awful at anything that requires any degree of hand eye coordination, which is every sport[/quote]
uh no-one's good at a sport naturally, you have to practice it.
[QUOTE=thisispain;37778580]
get one. it'll force you to put your energies to good use and you'll have money for a hobby
[/QUOTE]
From my experiences at Burger King, making some fat fuck's triple angry whopper only for them to complain about it being made sloppy is not a valid use of your energy.
[editline]23rd September 2012[/editline]
And flipping burgers is pretty much the only job a college student can get.
[QUOTE=Taepodong-2;37778608]From my experiences at Burger King, making some fat fuck's triple angry whopper only for them to complain about it being made sloppy is not a valid use of your energy.
[editline]23rd September 2012[/editline]
And flipping burgers is pretty much the only job a college student can get.[/QUOTE]
Is there anything that you [I]do[/I] enjoy?
[QUOTE=Megafan;37778687]Is there anything that you [I]do[/I] enjoy?[/QUOTE]
I used to play airsoft and enjoyed that, but my gun is broken and I have no money to fix it or buy a new one.
[QUOTE=Taepodong-2;37778608]From my experiences at Burger King, making some fat fuck's triple angry whopper only for them to complain about it being made sloppy is not a valid use of your energy.
[editline]23rd September 2012[/editline]
And flipping burgers is pretty much the only job a college student can get.[/QUOTE]
You can always try some techniques to ignore the issue altogether instead of channeling your energy into something else because you're overreacting to that one scenario. Usually, in a situation like this, I think I would just go with my saying: "You aren't as special as you think you are." The people in the elevator probably didn't give a shit what you thought of what they were doing so why do you make such a big deal of it? If you could please explain the mental process you go through that causes you to become enraged and infuriated?
At this point I'd likely agree with thisispain.
[quote]if that doesn't work you might want to considering professional anger management[/quote]
[QUOTE=Taepodong-2;37778740]I used to play airsoft and enjoyed that, but my gun is broken and I have no money to fix it or buy a new one.[/QUOTE]
How often do you leave your home? (serious question though)
"want to considering" jesus christ i need to proof read my posts better
[QUOTE=HellSoldier;37778785]
How often do you leave your home? (serious question though)[/QUOTE]
Technically I live in university dorms and not at home, but same thing really. And really I mostly just leave to go to class or get food because there's nothing else to do here. I checked out all the clubs when they had the club day and they were all shitty.
[editline]23rd September 2012[/editline]
[QUOTE=HellSoldier;37778785]You can always try some techniques to ignore the issue altogether instead of channeling your energy into something else because you're overreacting to that one scenario. Usually, in a situation like this, I think I would just go with my saying: "You aren't as special as you think you are." The people in the elevator probably didn't give a shit what you thought of what they were doing so why do you make such a big deal of it? If you could please explain the mental process you go through that causes you to become enraged and infuriated?
[/QUOTE]
The problem is I have no fucking clue why seemingly everyone else can have a happy relationship but I can't. Just the mere sight of a happy couple makes me mad and makes me give them death glares.
[QUOTE=Taepodong-2;37778819]The problem is I have no fucking clue why seemingly everyone else can have a happy relationship but I can't. Just the mere sight of a happy couple makes me mad and makes me give them death glares.[/QUOTE]
you get jealous, mad and judgemental waaaay too easily
lighten up. if you can't, try and see if you can get help because that sounds a little serious
dude you've got work to do if the sight of happy people sends you into some sort of rage
and there are plenty of jobs you can get. i delivered pizza for 2 years prior to moving up to college, i worked at a grocery store etc.
Fuck it, I think I'm just going to accept that every girl who wants to date probably has a boyfriend by now. Maybe if I realize this I'll stop giving a shit and feel better.
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