• The Super Friendly Social and Love Advice Thread v3 - February
    10,002 replies, posted
[QUOTE=CheeserCrice;35097203]The last thing Sawah needs is advice from a bunch of young single people on an internet forum about abortion. Seriously, talk to your parents, to doctors and more experienced people.[/QUOTE] exactly this. your average facepunch user is going to be male, likely 18 or under, and probably has never experienced anything similar, so they really are not the best people to ask advice from. being roughly the same age (and sex) as SaWAH i'd say we were quite similar, but i've never been in a situation like that and so i don't really feel that even i can even give any advice on the matter. if there is someone (female) who has been through this, then i'd be all up for their advice... but seeing as i don't think there is, i don't think it should be discussed at any length in here. and my other main reason for not really wanting it discussed at length in here is because certain people are just using SaWAH as a reason to bring up their own views on abortion and what not, and this isn't the right place for it.
I've been pregnant three times.
[QUOTE=CheeserCrice;35097203]The last thing Sawah needs is advice from a bunch of young single people on an internet forum about abortion. Seriously, talk to your parents, to doctors and more experienced people. (I doubt any of you are actually parents, which does change your perspective on this stuff a lot) [editline]11th March 2012[/editline] Plus it seems like most of you are seeing Behemoth as 'pro life' and immediately just rating him dumbs, he is making good points and you should respect a different opinion to your own.[/QUOTE] Finally. Someone who gets me. Thank you!
dont get me wrong, i think its sorta dumb to ask this thread for advice on this, but we definitely dont need a rule saying "no large life choices!!!"
[QUOTE=Jo The Shmo;35097756]dont get me wrong, i think its sorta dumb to ask this thread for advice on this, but we definitely dont need a rule saying "no large life choices!!!"[/QUOTE] The rule is, "No political-social debates!"
[QUOTE=Phsykotik;35097852]The rule is, "No political-social debates!"[/QUOTE] i was talking about 1chains1 suggestion
[QUOTE=SaWAH;35090318]gulp i'm pregnant[/QUOTE] I'm sure you'll make the right choice about what to do with that little guy/gal growing in your belly.
If I may vent for a moment. Today, it is my grandpa's birthday. We went to his house to celebrate, and we all dressed up for the occasion. My cousin, who is pretty good looking, said I looked nice. Since it was a friendly compliment I just say "Haha thanks, you too!" Now, after returning home, my mom was like "Did you see how your cousin said you looked nice? LIKE REALLY NICE!?" and all I can think is, "what the fuck. why is this important." I'm still at a loss of what to say. It was just so... random, stupid. My mom keeps trying to tell me that "girls notice how good I look" and, well, I really don't care. After I broke up with my ex I haven't really been searching for another girlfriend and yet everyone thinks I'm a lonely sob with confidence issues. It's just annoying. I don't ever complain about not having a girlfriend - I don't think I'm unattractive, rather the opposite - I'm probably the most confident person in this household. And then my mom and goes and tries to "reassure" me that girls notice me...Okay? I don't really care. I notice girls, too, but I don't really want a girlfriend right now - I don't even need one. I've been more than satisfied with my life the way it is. I... just... I don't know. I don't know, but I don't like it.
[QUOTE=Protocol7;35100173]If I may vent for a moment. Today, it is my grandpa's birthday. We went to his house to celebrate, and we all dressed up for the occasion. My cousin, who is pretty good looking, said I looked nice. Since it was a friendly compliment I just say "Haha thanks, you too!" Now, after returning home, my mom was like "Did you see how your cousin said you looked nice? LIKE REALLY NICE!?" and all I can think is, "what the fuck. why is this important." I'm still at a loss of what to say. It was just so... random, stupid. My mom keeps trying to tell me that "girls notice how good I look" and, well, I really don't care. After I broke up with my ex I haven't really been searching for another girlfriend and yet everyone thinks I'm a lonely sob with confidence issues. It's just annoying. I don't ever complain about not having a girlfriend - I don't think I'm unattractive, rather the opposite - I'm probably the most confident person in this household. And then my mom and goes and tries to "reassure" me that girls notice me...Okay? I don't really care. I notice girls, too, but I don't really want a girlfriend right now - I don't even need one. I've been more than satisfied with my life the way it is. I... just... I don't know. I don't know, but I don't like it.[/QUOTE] I know how you feel. Is it honestly that impossible for people to comprehend that you can move on after a relationship?
[QUOTE=Luci-fer;35100301]I know how you feel. Is it honestly that impossible for people to comprehend that you can move on after a relationship?[/QUOTE] It's not even that - it's just why do people make assumptions that go completely against the obvious truth? How does anyone even think that I'm feeling lonely and not confident when I've been nothing but happy for the past I don't know 9 weeks, going out with friends and doing fun shit - where do people figure I need a girlfriend when I explicitly say I'm not actively looking?
No idea.... People are stupid.
So there is a bizare scenario where the girl I like according to my friends thinks I'm nice but she says we don't talk much. My friends (who are also her friends) told me to just capitulate and look for new fish. Your thoughts? [editline]11th March 2012[/editline] [QUOTE=Protocol7;35100173]-snip-[/QUOTE] Your mother is just trying to be reassuring so you don't get hurt, don't be angry! I can see why it may be annoying though. You could just ask her to tone it down a shade.
[QUOTE=Zambies!;35102330]Your mother is just trying to be reassuring so you don't get hurt, don't be angry! I can see why it may be annoying though. You could just ask her to tone it down a shade.[/QUOTE] I know her well enough - that's definitely not it. The woman is mentally unstable, and I'm completely serious when I say that. I'm not going into details, but it's a sort of sticky situation where she's in denial about everything she does wrong and refuses to see a psychiatrist. My best guess - based on what has happened on the past - she looks into a situation too hard, find something that irritates her, and when she does, tries to fix it or get angry.
[QUOTE=Protocol7;35100173]If I may vent for a moment. Today, it is my grandpa's birthday. We went to his house to celebrate, and we all dressed up for the occasion. My cousin, who is pretty good looking, said I looked nice. Since it was a friendly compliment I just say "Haha thanks, you too!" Now, after returning home, my mom was like "Did you see how your cousin said you looked nice? LIKE REALLY NICE!?" and all I can think is, "what the fuck. why is this important." I'm still at a loss of what to say. It was just so... random, stupid. My mom keeps trying to tell me that "girls notice how good I look" and, well, I really don't care. After I broke up with my ex I haven't really been searching for another girlfriend and yet everyone thinks I'm a lonely sob with confidence issues. It's just annoying. I don't ever complain about not having a girlfriend - I don't think I'm unattractive, rather the opposite - I'm probably the most confident person in this household. And then my mom and goes and tries to "reassure" me that girls notice me...Okay? I don't really care. I notice girls, too, but I don't really want a girlfriend right now - I don't even need one. I've been more than satisfied with my life the way it is. I... just... I don't know. I don't know, but I don't like it.[/QUOTE] She's probably just proud that someone other than herself thinks of her son as good looking. Most likely some kind of self reasurrence.
[QUOTE=SaWAH;35090521]Seriosly. Just found out today. Haven't had my period since january 20, so I figured I was late enough to take a test. I had one lying around seeing as my period is pretty irregular, so a pregnancy test is something I do every other month, basically, just to be sure. I wasn't expecting it to actually be positive, so I was in shock. It's a bit more devastating than I thought it would be. I'm for abortion and all, but I feel weird about it, seeing as it's my boyfriend and I mixed together in a little to-be creature. I can't have a baby now, though, I've just started uni this year and my parents would be out of their minds if I decided to have a baby now. I'm just finding it all a bit harder to cope with than I would've expected. What makes it even harder is that my boyfriend and I (for fun) made this list of baby names half a year ago or so. Not so fun right now, seeing as we even have a name for the poor thing. I'm so scared that I might regret getting rid of it, because if I wasn't where I was in my life right now, I'd want the baby. My boyfriend is ready to be a dad, and I don't feel like I'll be more ready mentally than I am now in a couple of years. It's just such bad timing. [editline]11th March 2012[/editline] like, i mean, we're looking for a kitten to buy right now we didn't ask for a baby.[/QUOTE] flush flush flush
[QUOTE=SaWAH;35090318]gulp i'm pregnant[/QUOTE] [url]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yIk_j8qhoYc[/url] Other than being a dick, all I can do is to wish good luck. Also, isn't there a chemical abortion for such an early state of the pregnancy process?
So well, my girlfriend cheated on me friday night. Kinda feeling a bit mixed up. I've been arguing with myself on how I would react if I was told something like this, and while I didn't think of it in the moment, I followed my own advice. She told me in person, and that's pretty much why I didn't break up or something. We had been walking around in the park for an hour and so, and she told me while we hugged. Telling something like that in person takes a lot of courage, and if she wanted to go the easy route she could just not have told. I'd never have a chance to find out. She didn't try to go around the subject, and we discussed it for some 30 minutes before I asked her if she thought we had talked it over. She just said that if I thought that we had talked enough about it, she would think so too. I don't know if my decision was the right one, but I think that she needed comfort rather than me throwing a wobbler. I didn't at any point say that it was okay or understandable, and while I did try to comfort her, I let her know how I felt about it. If she does it again, I won't beat around the bush, but I really think that she regretted it very much. So yeah, Facepunch, do you think I did the right thing? I feel like this was the right thing to do, and while I'm not happy with it in any way, I did what I felt was right to do.
I hate the act of cheating, however, most people are capable of making mistakes. I know that throwing the mistake card may seem like an easy way out, but things aren't always black and white, and if you are able to move on then good for you, you made the right descision. If she genuinly regrets it, it won't happen again, because she'll feel so much guilt that she won't allow herself to do so and it'll probably be in te back of her mind forever. The standard we set up for relationships now a days are sky-high anyway. We expect to go through a life with our partners without them (or us) making mistakes, when hardly anyone goes through life without making not just one but several. It's not whether or not you make the mistakes, but whether or not you learn from them. If you can't forgive the big mistakes, you would've broken up eventually anyway. That's how I see it anyway.
the question if did you do the right thing is so impossible to answer because no-one could give you any advice beyond the not-nuanced cheating isn't the end/fuck that cheating scumbag.
[QUOTE=SaWAH;35104822]I hate the act of cheating, however, most people are capable of making mistakes. I know that throwing the mistake card may seem like an easy way out, but things aren't always black and white, and if you are able to move on then good for you, you made the right descision. If she genuinly regrets it, it won't happen again, because she'll feel so much guilt that she won't allow herself to do so and it'll probably be in te back of her mind forever. The standard we set up for relationships now a days are sky-high anyway. We expect to go through a life with our partners without them (or us) making mistakes, when hardly anyone goes through life without making not just one but several. It's not whether or not you make the mistakes, but whether or not you learn from them. If you can't forgive the big mistakes, you would've broken up eventually anyway. That's how I see it anyway.[/QUOTE] This is pretty much how I felt about it. She seemed like she regretted it very much, and as such I wouldn't want to make it any harder for her. [editline]12th March 2012[/editline] [QUOTE=thisispain;35104872]the question if did you do the right thing is so impossible to answer because no-one could give you any advice beyond the not-nuanced cheating isn't the end/fuck that cheating scumbag.[/QUOTE] I know, but sometimes simply letting something out, helps.
[QUOTE=GoDong-DK;35104896] I know, but sometimes simply letting something out, helps.[/QUOTE] I understand, but don't get hung up on the notion of doing the right thing. i get hung up on it a lot and it has never done me any good.
I introduced my gf to mass effect, what have i done
I introduced my ex-girlfriend to L4D and boy I did not regret it at all. We always were like 3 friends playing together and always needed one more teammember to play with. Then once my girlfriend asked if she could play with us :v: It was so much fun, having a girl play L4D on [b]Expert![/b]
[QUOTE=Protocol7;35102558]I know her well enough - that's definitely not it. The woman is mentally unstable, and I'm completely serious when I say that. I'm not going into details, but it's a sort of sticky situation where she's in denial about everything she does wrong and refuses to see a psychiatrist. My best guess - based on what has happened on the past - she looks into a situation too hard, find something that irritates her, and when she does, tries to fix it or get angry.[/QUOTE] If you know this, why does it bother you so much when people are oblivious to the truth?
[QUOTE=junker|154;35105707]I introduced my ex-girlfriend to L4D and boy I did not regret it at all. We always were like 3 friends playing together and always needed one more teammember to play with. Then once my girlfriend asked if she could play with us :v: It was so much fun, having a girl play L4D on [b]Expert![/b][/QUOTE] that's a great idea :D
[QUOTE=Seith;35105849]If you know this, why does it bother you so much when people are oblivious to the truth?[/QUOTE] [QUOTE=Seith;35105849][B]when people are oblivious to the truth[/B][/QUOTE] ??? That's like saying "Why do you continue to develop bruises if you know someone is punching you?"
[QUOTE=Protocol7;35108269]??? That's like saying "Why do you continue to develop bruises if you know someone is punching you?"[/QUOTE] It's not. When someone is punching you, you will always keep getting bruised. That's a physical situation, and not a mental one, which can be changed in comparison. That's like saying "Why would I even try fixing this clogged sink??? I'm no plumber" That question was about you, not the people. The way you reacted can be altered.
[QUOTE=Seith;35109786]It's not. When someone is punching you, you will always keep getting bruised. That's a physical situation, and not a mental one, which can be changed in comparison. That's like saying "Why would I even try fixing this clogged sink??? I'm no plumber" That question was about you, not the people. The way you reacted can be altered.[/QUOTE] Well when someone is "oblivious to the truth" and makes statements that are asinine almost constantly, it's kind of counterproductive to brush it off. At least I'm venting on a webforum and not to her face, right?
[QUOTE=Protocol7;35109964]Well when someone is "oblivious to the truth" and makes statements that are asinine almost constantly, it's kind of counterproductive to brush it off. At least I'm venting on a webforum and not to her face, right?[/QUOTE] I don't really know in what condition your mother is in details, but to confront her peacefully might yield better results than you think. Venting is accepting something you don't agree with, and again, even though I don't know your mother's condition, it sounds like one of those things you could handle better by speaking out.
[QUOTE=GoDong-DK;35104779]So well, my girlfriend cheated on me friday night. Kinda feeling a bit mixed up. I've been arguing with myself on how I would react if I was told something like this, and while I didn't think of it in the moment, I followed my own advice. She told me in person, and that's pretty much why I didn't break up or something. We had been walking around in the park for an hour and so, and she told me while we hugged. Telling something like that in person takes a lot of courage, and if she wanted to go the easy route she could just not have told. I'd never have a chance to find out. She didn't try to go around the subject, and we discussed it for some 30 minutes before I asked her if she thought we had talked it over. She just said that if I thought that we had talked enough about it, she would think so too. I don't know if my decision was the right one, but I think that she needed comfort rather than me throwing a wobbler. I didn't at any point say that it was okay or understandable, and while I did try to comfort her, I let her know how I felt about it. If she does it again, I won't beat around the bush, but I really think that she regretted it very much. So yeah, Facepunch, do you think I did the right thing? I feel like this was the right thing to do, and while I'm not happy with it in any way, I did what I felt was right to do.[/QUOTE] You did the right thing, mate. Why add extra drama to the equation when both of you talked about it. Well, just don't be so forgiving if it happens again. And if she's a smart girl, it won't.
Sorry, you need to Log In to post a reply to this thread.