First Official Facepunch Writing Competition! Fabulous Prizes! - General

I'll be writing, within an hour I'll already have 2 pages or so done.

Will there be any Honourable Mentions?

[QUOTE=CabooseRvB;23701633]Will there be any Honourable Mentions?[/QUOTE]This. It'd be nice to know who you thought also stood out.

[QUOTE=CabooseRvB;23701633]Will there be any Honourable Mentions?[/QUOTE] Yep.

[QUOTE=pyrofiliac;23671249]Once upon a time, there were/was a [B]nuclear war/zombies/global warming[/B]. A [B]lone hero/heroine/heroin addict[/B] must travel a vast distance through an [B]abandoned mall/barren wasteland/the deep south[/B] and do a great many [B]good deeds/quests/bitches[/B]. Along the way, this person encounters [B]zombies/rednecks/raiders/robots[/B], but perseveres. In the end, the [B]lone hero/heroine/heroin addict[/B] decides to give [b]his life to save the human race/his loved ones for the greater good/his money to a hooker[/B]. All is well in the [B]abandoned mall/barren wasteland/the deep south[/B], the end. [editline]07:35PM[/editline] do i win?[/QUOTE] Well, for accuracy... All of the above happens down here in Arkansas. [editline]07:43AM[/editline] [QUOTE=Garb;23671090]Once upon a time, joe the retarded eel was walking along, Humming his favorite song- when suddenly he heard a earth rattling crack. It was a Nuke. All of a sudden joe had a heart attack and died. I want portal 2 when it gets released in a couple years.[/QUOTE] My ribs hurt very badly now.

[QUOTE=-Dazed-;23692921]You submitted correctly. If you feel like it's a sleep deprived mess, remember that you can change it in googledocs and our copy will be automatically updated.[/QUOTE] Thanks, I'll probably do that. This writing is really outside my comfort zone, I'm used to writing southern gothic and bildungsromans

I really want to write a short story for this. Although I've never had much experience writing, besides essays for college but they have never been very creative. All I have to do now is find a good idea.

I finally got a good idea, though it might come off a little sad

[QUOTE=Big Dumb American;23695488]I submitted my story. Never before in my life have I written something which has made me feel so bad. I've always thought that writing was a fun experience, but creating this was the opposite of fun: it was horrifying. I doubt that it will have the same sort of emotional effect on the readers as it did with me, but I want you to understand that I'm not just being melodramatic. "Darius Says Hello" fucking terrified me. I need a long shower and a good night's sleep.[/QUOTE] I couldn't believe how depressing I had made some of my story after I wrote it. I am not a depressed person.

Ok, Whoever wrote 'red dead john merston: the return and dislike' gets the Tara Gillesbie award, that is if we somehow find a worse one.

Is there any way to turn off the dictionary in google docs? Can't get rid of the red lines for proper nouns, fairly annoying :\

Man now I really want to judge. :saddowns: I guess I'll just wait until the next contest.

I'm having a hard time keeping this down. I've got a good short story down, and it's at a great place to stop, but I have two more scenarios I'd like to throw in, to make it more empathizable. I could end it right now, and I suppose it'd work, but I'd really like to get at least one more scenario in. Oh well, I guess I'll just wrap it up and submit (currently at 1200 words, I'm thinking it'll be around 1700 once I'm done wrapping it up), and then continue it as a "special extended" edition. :v: Really wishing the limit was 3,000 words...

There's been a lot more entries than I was expecting. Seeing some real quality floating about, too! Keep it up, but try not to flood us. On an alternate note: the OP is getting a weird combination of ratings.

Okay, so I kinda got a halfway in between the full scenario I wanted and a summary-conclusion, and I think it worked out well. I'm hope that being 152 words over the limit won't cause any issues, though. :ohdear: [editline]Fish[/editline] Submitted my entry. All in all, I'm not too impressed with it - I really would have liked to expound the second scenario (which was actually three scenarios compiled together) more, and then add a third scenario to further reinforce the point, but I suppose that, for the restrictions put on it, it gets its job done. I just hope it's not too bad. :ohdear:

Finaly have a plot that could work. I have no idea how it will end though, I created two characters that I feel attached to. They don't like each other though. Let's see where this goes.

Maybe OP could post the names of the people who have entered just so that we know we've submitted it correctly?

Damn it, 800 words in and I've not even started full :ohdear:

[QUOTE=Gibo990;23714053]Maybe OP could post the names of the people who have entered just so that we know we've submitted it correctly?[/QUOTE] I think we should both have the names of those who entered [i]and[/i] a link to their story. It'd give everybody something fun to talk about. Comparing stories, discussing favorites, offering tips and suggestions on how to improve; these things are awesome for both writers and followers. I'd also think most of the people who enter this contest would want to show off their work- that's half the fun in writing!

[QUOTE=Livewire2440;23706529]Ok, Whoever wrote 'red dead john merston: the return and dislike' gets the Tara Gillesbie award, that is if we somehow find a worse one.[/QUOTE] can you post a link?

[QUOTE=Big Dumb American;23714692]I think we should both have the names of those who entered [i]and[/i] a link to their story. It'd give everybody something fun to talk about. Comparing stories, discussing favorites, offering tips and suggestions on how to improve; these things are awesome for both writers and followers. I'd also think most of the people who enter this contest would want to show off their work- that's half the fun in writing![/QUOTE] I'm not so sure - I think it'd turn alot of people off if we started comparing works. That sort of thing is best left till after the contest. Being in hushed competition is a little more exciting, and of course more reassuring to those who've had very little experience in writing come out and have a go. We have many younger members, and I worry that it'll create a 'Oh he's better than me, I might as well not bother' atmosphere.

[QUOTE=Gibo990;23714053]Maybe OP could post the names of the people who have entered just so that we know we've submitted it correctly?[/QUOTE] Sure thing - he'll probably update it later today. For now, I'll post what we have so far. The names are in no particular order. If your names not down there, but you submitted a story, something went wrong. Now might be a good time to note that I download the stories daily/bi-daily in case something bad and unpredictable happens. ButtsexV2 Sgt.Khorn Bloodydollar915 CabooseRvB CanadianBill StephenOrlov BaneHaven Jad Hinto DemonicDazz Gibo990 JackHowers DudeGuyKT thedestroyerofall InvisibleTed Jazucu Mort and Charon strayebyrd Big Dumb American Binksy Kid Cudi Gmod4ever TheDiddler BaconDioxide One person forgot to leave their FP name, the information we have is that the document is called 'Short Survival Story' and the writer is Ukranian (we're keeping email names confidential, btw). Your name not up there? I made this post at 22:00 - GMT on Thursay, July 29, if you posted later than that then it won't be on the list. If you did email us earlier than that then something went wrong. [editline]05:01PM[/editline] [QUOTE=Big Dumb American;23714692]I think we should both have the names of those who entered [i]and[/i] a link to their story. It'd give everybody something fun to talk about. Comparing stories, discussing favorites, offering tips and suggestions on how to improve; these things are awesome for both writers and followers. I'd also think most of the people who enter this contest would want to show off their work- that's half the fun in writing![/QUOTE] We'll be waiting until the end of the competition to post stories. We don't want a flamefest to go down, and we don't want to discourage anyone. Besides, it's just downright unprofessional. Of course, this not a 'professional' competition, but I'd personally like to withhold judgment until the end of the competition. I don't speak for all the judges, but I'm personally not reading stories until the end so I can read them all at once. I don't want to be biased by my mental state of the day. I think each story deserves to be read in the same frame of mind.

Finally submitted mine. Add me to the list. :D [editline]11:16PM[/editline] [QUOTE=Big Dumb American;23714692]I think we should both have the names of those who entered [i]and[/i] a link to their story. It'd give everybody something fun to talk about. Comparing stories, discussing favorites, offering tips and suggestions on how to improve; these things are awesome for both writers and followers. I'd also think most of the people who enter this contest would want to show off their work- that's half the fun in writing![/QUOTE] I also agree with you, but it's up to the judges.

:siren: NOT an entry :siren: I sometimes write stories about shit. I take a subject (normally a trivial one) and exaggerate and make it ludicrous. Below I have quoted a short story about an STD, although I normally go for something more trivial like making a baguette. [quote] [B]The day of the Rash[/B] It had the makings of a great day; the sun was out, Gordon Brown had resigned the day prior and Ali had had a nice sleep in until midday. That was until all this was fucked to oblivion by the realisation that the once smooth skin of his genitalia was now occupied by the most god-awful rash that you could conceivably imagine. He realised he must have got this from a sexual encounter at a party a few days before, but he'd had one cup of punch too much that night, reaching a total of about 2 ml of pure alcohol in his system, and as such had lost all memory of the night. Realising that the only way to solve the situation would be to murder who was responsible, Ali donned his most badass clothes- a leather jacket, some black jeans, steel toe-capped boots and some woollen fingerless gloves. He put on a thick leather belt of a murky shit-brown colour, and attached his gun holster in which he holstered his prized six-shooter which was of Smith & Wesson make and was a tarnished silver colour. He pocketed a few loose .357 rounds, and grabbed his mobile phone (YES YOU FUCKING YANKS A MOBILE PHONE NOT A MOTHERFUCKING CELL PHONE KILL YOURSELVES) which he deftly thrust into his left jean pocket, before coordinating his arm muscles to perform a similar action on his wallet, with the difference that this item was placed in the front-right jean pocket. Storming out of the front door with the anger and spite of a homosexual faggot who has just realised that Lady GaGa is a real woman (perhaps a false realisation), Ali hastily began sprinting down the street. He quickly saw the flaw in his idea, as years of conditioning to being almost permanently seated at a computer desk eating stray crisps that had fallen from the packets in previous months had allowed his lungs to deteriorate in their ability to keep his muscles oxygenated, and it wasn't long before Ali was hunched over, hands on knees while he panted quickly and rhythmically. He took the opportunity to rack his brain in a desperate bid to remember which imbecilic whore of a slut had given him the STD, but the harder he tried, the more difficult he found it to recall anything at all. He did, however, know where the party was held, and who the host was, so that was where he started. Knocking on the wooden door that had been painted a deep green - perhaps in a moment of retardation on the painter's part - Ali began to become increasingly agitated. He started getting crazy and illogical thoughts into his head, and seriously considered kicking the door down and shooting everybody inside. Fortunately, his insane and murderous thoughts were interrupted by a wild faggot appearing and opening the door. "Thanks" Ali mumbled incoherently as he let himself in, and the wild faggot promptly fucked off. However, his disappearance was quickly followed by the emergence of the party's host, Dave. Dave was a bit of a twat in that he would get engrossed in the reading of online "guides to getting laid", and would never be put off by multiple, consecutive failed pick-up attempts. Ali enquired about the night straight off the bat, and Dave was reluctant to share information. Sensing that he was hiding something, Ali smacked Dave in the face with a dumpster that was lying unceremoniously next to the dining room table. The weight of the dumpster, combined with Ali's immense strength and thus speed in swinging the object, caused Dave to be immediately rendered unconscious. Thinking quickly, Ali tied his limbs together with some rope, which was conveniently lying on the tabletop, and proceeded to bundle Dave down into the cellar, which had a door equally conveniently placed under a rug in the living room. [I]"You're lying!" exclaimed Ali in a not-so uncommon fit of rage, as he brought another fist down upon Dave's vulnerable shoulder. Dave maintained eye-contact, his pupils bulging and the hate strongly evident in his anguished expression. Knowing that he had to step it up, Ali took some bamboo shoots and forced them between Dave's skin and his fingernails. The screams from his throat did not cease for several minutes, and the blood pool that was forming at his feet was enough to make even Ali feel somewhat nauseous. [/I] Walking down the street whilst wiping the blood off of his jacket, Ali was slightly guilty of the methods he'd used, but was glad of the information they had procured. He no longer had time for niceties, and as he neared the bitch's house he drew his revolver and made sure that a round was aligned perfectly with the trajectory of the firing pin. He stood to the side of the door, and knocked harshly and strongly. The door was quickly opened and Ali stepped round with the firearm raised, immediately pulling back the trigger. The recoil of the handgun surprised him, but the shock he felt was mostly due to the fact that he had shot the bitch's father, who was likely innocent of any STD-spreading crimes. Undeterred, Ali stepped into the house and kicked through into the kitchen. As would be expected, the woman was in here. Unsurprisingly, she was already looking his way with fear in her eyes, as you would expect if you heard a gunshot at your door. Slowly raising her hands in surrender, whilst murmuring in protest, the slut's mouth opened and closed as she tried to piece together the information that was taken from the stimuli that her senses were given her in order to best work out what the actual fuck was going on. "P...p...please" she stammered pointlessly, as Ali took brief aim with his S&W and fired twice into her chest. She stumbled back and fell, and as Ali walked forward, he noticed the blood gurgling out her mouth. He emptied his remaining three rounds into her stupid bitch brain, before wiping off the weapon and dropping it, finished by him making swift his exit. As such, a socially inept virgin survived another day in the cruel world in which we humans, reside. [/quote]I don't know what you're looking for in the competition but it sounds like it won't be something that interests me/ is in my scope. If you ever want a story about casually murdering people then feel free to ask me.

[QUOTE=MrEndangered;23715106]I'm not so sure - I think it'd turn alot of people off if we started comparing works. That sort of thing is best left till after the contest. Being in hushed competition is a little more exciting, and of course more reassuring to those who've had very little experience in writing come out and have a go. We have many younger members, and I worry that it'll create a 'Oh he's better than me, I might as well not bother' atmosphere.[/QUOTE] Yeah, good point. The idea is ultimately to encourage budding writers to step up and try their hand at writing a story, and some people may be discouraged if they pop in and see works which they imagine far surpass their own abilities. There will be plenty of time for suggestions, advice, and all that happy horseshit after the contest. Quick question for the judges: are these stories judged as you receive them, or are they being saved for judgement/review until after you stop receiving submissions? I ask because I feel I may have prematurely submitted my entry. I wanted to be done with it and move onto something new, but I keep finding myself returning to it, making changes and corrections. As dark a mood as working on it puts me in, I can't drop the damn thing until I'm satisfied that I did everything I could to make it the best read possible.

[QUOTE=Big Dumb American;23716305]Yeah, good point. The idea is ultimately to encourage budding writers to step up and try their hand at writing a story, and some people may be discouraged if they pop in and see works which they imagine far surpass their own abilities. There will be plenty of time for suggestions, advice, and all that happy horseshit after the contest. Quick question for the judges: are these stories judged as you receive them, or are they being saved for judgement/review until after you stop receiving submissions? I ask because I feel I may have prematurely submitted my entry. I wanted to be done with it and move onto something new, but I keep finding myself returning to it, making changes and corrections. As dark a mood as working on it puts me in, I can't drop the damn thing until I'm satisfied that I did everything I could to make it the best read possible.[/QUOTE] This is actually part of the reason we're using googledocs. Any changes you make on the googledoc is saved, and, when we view the document again, we see the the most recent revision. We allow you to make these revisions until the end of the contest, at which point we will download and read all entries. As I addressed a couple posts up I will be withholding judgment until the end of the competition for reasons I explained within the post.

[QUOTE=-Dazed-;23716482]This is actually part of the reason we're using googledocs. Any changes you make on the googledoc is saved, and, when we view the document again, we see the the most recent revision. We allow you to make these revisions until the end of the contest, at which point we will download and read all entries. As I addressed a couple posts up I will be withholding judgment until the end of the competition for reasons I explained within the post.[/QUOTE] [img]http://www.cineplex.com/Movies/FamousNews/FamousMagazine/ecms.aspx/$cineplex/ShearerBurns_2.jpg[/img] Excellent.

Oh fuck yes, I am totally getting in on this.

[QUOTE=Big Dumb American;23714692]I think we should both have the names of those who entered [i]and[/i] a link to their story. It'd give everybody something fun to talk about. Comparing stories, discussing favorites, offering tips and suggestions on how to improve; these things are awesome for both writers and followers. I'd also think most of the people who enter this contest would want to show off their work- that's half the fun in writing![/QUOTE] You are smart, Dumb.

This is a section from a story in which a guy loses both of his arms, and is in hospital. [i]Gave me a big bag of marshmallows. Everything was going fine until I pointed out that I couldn’t play the piano any more. He replied that I shouldn’t worry, as I could still play the foot drum, and chuckled. I told him to fuck off and get out. [/i] I have to admit, i laughed.