Super Friendly Social and Love Advice v7 - Bro just do it, She prob likes you - General

Is it wrong of me to get upset about my LDR ex playing games with another guy? I "broke up" with her recently after 6 months into our LDR. We've stayed friends since then, but I've not been good at being active in talking with her, mostly because I've been busy. She says she's only playing with him because she misses having someone to play with, and she's supposedly known him for a long while. She also says she's not ready to move on yet. It's been making me really upset, and depressed, even though it's really my fault for basically pushing her away inadvertently...

[QUOTE=Emugod;48939350]Is it wrong of me to get upset about my LDR ex playing games with another guy? [/QUOTE] yep

[QUOTE=puppy156;48934570]I feel like my accent makes me look weird and I feel like it just ruins me when I enter social situations. I have a Norwegian accent that's really thick, and people find it hard to understand me a little at times, someone today told me that I sounded horrid when speaking English. What do I do about it? It sucks too, because I feel so god damn awkward when everyone else can speak clearly.[/QUOTE] Dude I had a good friend from Norway and his accent was awesome. Granted, his was perfectly understandable once you'd been speaking to him for a little while but it was still quite strong. If yours is getting in the way of communication, maybe there are resources you can use to practice your pronunciation? I hope I'm not being patronising by suggesting it, but you could even try to just emulate how your friends pronounce things, one word/phrase at a time. Maybe even ask friends your comfortable with to help you with certain words if you're having trouble. [editline]20th October 2015[/editline] Besides, I bet their accent in Norwegian would be shithouse.

[QUOTE=Emugod;48939350]Is it wrong of me to get upset about my LDR ex playing games with another guy? I "broke up" with her recently after 6 months into our LDR. We've stayed friends since then, but I've not been good at being active in talking with her, mostly because I've been busy. She says she's only playing with him because she misses having someone to play with, and she's supposedly known him for a long while. She also says she's not ready to move on yet. It's been making me really upset, and depressed, even though it's really my fault for basically pushing her away inadvertently...[/QUOTE] You broke up with her, you rarely even talk to her anymore, and you're mad that she's talking to other people. Can you see how unreasonable you sound right now? [editline]19th October 2015[/editline] I mean, even if you were still with her, this would be unreasonable. No matter how close you are with someone you have no business telling them who they should interact with. I think you need to speak to a counselor and find out why you have such massive control issues.

Whoa, whoa. All I said was that I was upset about it. Not that I was angry with her. I'm not allowed to be upset? It's not like I'm forcing her to stop talking to the guy. All I've done is mention that it's bothered me. Not a "It bothers me that you're doing this and I want you to stop" kind of way, but a "this is how this situation makes me feel" way. I'm not mad whatsoever at her for talking to other people. Does it hurt? A bit, yes. I guess I know it's unreasonable, but it's just been bringing me down. I don't mind that she talks to other people at all, or even plays with them. It's just that it used to be me that she relied on to play games with and talk to, but since I've gotten way too busy to be able to do that. Knowing that she's chosen someone else kind of stings. When I said "makes me upset", I meant it makes me feel bad. Not that I get upset at her for it.

??? You're the one who broke up with her though.................

[QUOTE=Pascall;48941200]??? You're the one who broke up with her though.................[/QUOTE] I know, that's the reason I feel shit about it all. I "broke up" with her, but I still feel sad about her hanging out with this other guy. I didn't "break up" with her because I didn't care about her or that I didn't want her, it was a lot of different factors that piled up along with my personal life that made me unable to be with her "romantically" anymore. So, it's not like I still don't have feelings for her anymore. It just kind of hurts to know that someone took my position in her life.

Right. Well that being said it's like.. I don't know. That's a rough situation, but really, it's not her fault in any way, shape or form. And there really.. isn't much you can do about it besides move on or wait until your life settles down and then see if she's still around. Dwelling on it is just gonna make you upset. Gotta let it go. At least for now.

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I'm pretty much in a similar situation as you. So I think your reaction is somewhat normal from my perspective. My first girlfriend went to a college about 3-4 hours away and we did the long distance thing for a couple of years after high school. But eventually it grew tiresome (too comfortable with each other, asking myself "what if there was someone else?" blahblahblah) and I ended up breaking up with her. We were very close and comfortable (like being complete weirdos together) with each other so those feelings for her after a 3 year relationship definitely lingered (and still does now) so that's kind of a reason why I would feel jealous or upset when I learned she had started talking to another guy a couple months after our breakup. (Completely assholish of me, i know, but I couldn't help it.) It's definitely something I need to work on; to realize that she's free to do what she wants just like myself and I should be happy or at least content? with her trying to get out there again. I feel like it's the fear of her finding someone else before I do as well. Just thinking about her with someone else really screws with me. But we talked again and hung out as friends many times over summer, but we agreed to stop talking when school started. She had admitted she still had feelings for me but we agreed that we need to meet other people to see if we really love each other. (Sorta cliche eh?) Maybe in the future, sometime after college, we'll reconnect. Who knows. Slowly, but surely, I feel that i'm getting over it though. focusing on new hobbies like learning to work on my car, photography, and just hanging out with friends I feel has really kept my mind off of it. I think you should also try it. edit: I think i use parentheses too much lol

So in regards to that mentally handicapped guy that I spoke about I asked him to stop calling/talking to me at late hours, he called me gay and walked off laughing I'm powerless

you shall never escape the void of awkward small talk and unnecessary phone calls

[QUOTE=Emugod;48941180]Whoa, whoa. All I said was that I was upset about it. Not that I was angry with her. I'm not allowed to be upset? It's not like I'm forcing her to stop talking to the guy. All I've done is mention that it's bothered me. Not a "It bothers me that you're doing this and I want you to stop" kind of way, but a "this is how this situation makes me feel" way. I'm not mad whatsoever at her for talking to other people. Does it hurt? A bit, yes. I guess I know it's unreasonable, but it's just been bringing me down. I don't mind that she talks to other people at all, or even plays with them. It's just that it used to be me that she relied on to play games with and talk to, but since I've gotten way too busy to be able to do that. Knowing that she's chosen someone else kind of stings. When I said "makes me upset", I meant it makes me feel bad. Not that I get upset at her for it.[/QUOTE] You've gotten way too "busy" to have a spare hour one night to play games with her just to keep in touch? Sounds like you're making excuses for yourself and almost like a possessive personality.

-snip-

we'll guys I normally don't post here but I feel like sharing this and kinda ask your opinions. I recently started using tinder. It's great fun, and in a week I actually got in contact with this pretty nice but shy girl. She wasn't very good looking on her pictures, but hey you'll always learn something. So After a couple of days I asked her if she wanted to grab a coffee at starbucks with me and she said yes. Fun! The date itself was pretty good, we talked for one and a half hour and laughed a lot. She was better looking than expected and actually really down to earth. but after the date I wasn't really thinking there would be another one. Yesterday morning she texted me that her dad was away for that night and actually asked me if I would like to watch a movie at her place. So as every other guy would do, I went over to her place and had a lot of fun. But there was this thing about her. Like she was having fun with me but at the same time she was quite sad. So after we made out on the couch for an hour I asked her whats up. She didn't want to tell me but since I knew she didn't have a very good relationship with her dad and not that many friends, I told her she could tell anything to me. And what i got was the most heartbreaking life story I've heard in a long while. When she was 3 years old her mom turned out to be lesbian, and broke up with her dad. Apparently her mom couldn't take care of her anymore and she was brought to her grandparents, which raised her. They were extremely religious and for some reason she wasn't allowed to see her dad. Her dad tried to get her back for 3 years but after a lot of bullshit he gave up. She wasn't allowed to do anything. Get home before 7, she couldn't go to any friends, all the money she earned was taken away by her grandparents because 'she didn't need money', no computer no phone no anything. This made her very depressed, and even made her harm herself. She actually told me she tried to commit suicide 1,5 year ago. After her recovery she started looking for her dad and found him, and since she lives with him. Apparently she has no relationship whatsoever with him and they barely talk at home. She has a social worker because she has problems with talking about her problems with people. I asked her why she's so sad right now even though things are getting better, and oh it gets even worse. 2 months after she tried to commit suicide, one of her only friends did too.. And she succeeded. The girl committed suicide by throwing herself in front of the train... while her friend (the one i'm dating) was next to her. I couldn't believe it. Who would do that to a friend? Who would give a FRIEND that much more trauma? Well, apparently a girl who planned it all out and actually had a suicide note in her bag which was aimed towards the girl I'm dating right now. I'm not even gonna go in details because jezus christ.. It still makes her feel guilty every day. Even though she had nothing to do with it. Guys I really, really like this girl and I really think she deserves the best. I haven't even told you the full story but oh it's so sad to see such a nice girl go through all that shit. And I do wanna help her by just being a listening ear and talking to her, she has a nice (but also scarred) personality. But even though I really like her more than just a friend, I'm not sure if I should get in a relationship with this girl. I really notice that she aims for a relationship, and I personally do not. I just wanna have fun with a girl and see where it goes. Is it selfish to just have fun with her without aiming for a relationship? I really don't want to hurt her feelings. Even though she might say she doesn't care if I ask her this question, she probably does. I do have to say, I'm a positive person and I feel like I can have a great impact on her life but I really wonder if I'd want that.

It's not selfish, but you need to be straight-forward about your intentions. If you're just looking for a FWB deal, make sure she knows. Don't lead her on into thinking the ultimate goal is a relationship when you feel differently.

[QUOTE=thermobaric;48948073]post[/QUOTE] It makes you feel guilty for what exactly? If you don't want a relationship with her then don't imply it - but don't imply at the same time that you want to listen to her problems. That's part of a relationship. Then again I don't get the notion of 'just wanna have fun minus relationship' - why exactly? If you care about her well-being then why aren't you interested in a relationship? Either you care about her and are not a psychopath or you're OK with just masturbating using someone else. It sounds like you're in the first party. [editline]20th October 2015[/editline] Like what I mean by that is if you care about her, I don't see why you wouldn't want a relationship. Having someone as an FWB and caring about them (at a romantic level, caring for their psychological health) strikes me as weird.

[QUOTE=Disseminate;48948194] Like what I mean by that is if you care about her, I don't see why you wouldn't want a relationship. Having someone as an FWB and caring about them (at a romantic level, caring for their psychological health) strikes me as weird.[/QUOTE] It's not like I am aiming for FWB. I do want to get a relationship, but I should've told that I've only seen this girl 2 times right now (we texted a lot though). I'm not sure about a relationship with her yet but I do wanna keep seeing her and have a nice time (as in, go out and have some fun together). And after that i'll consider a relationship. But in the meanwhile, I do not want to get completely attached to her because that would hurt her feelings. And my question is, is that thought selfish? to have fun in the meantime without actually getting in a relationship? Or am I just being weird right now? Edited: I mean, this is not just an ordinary girl. I do personally need some time to consider a relationship with her. I feel like getting serious and then breaking up because it was a terrible idea is worse than just having fun and see where it'll go, while being a nice guy towards her.

You're aiming for fun and then let's see what happens. Which means you're also open for a serious relationship in the future. What's bothering you and making you have doubts is the emotional baggage you're getting into right away. I'd say go with the heart. If you like her, be with her. As long as you like her you'll never be a problem to her. People change as time passes. They might like you more or less over time. You don't know how's it gonna go on your end either. So there's not really much you can control there. If one day you don't feel that you like her like before just sit down and tell her.

I've always wondered, how do you guys be there for your friends? Or not even your friends but anyone really? I've always had a problem with never knowing what to do whenever somebody wants to talk about something. I know that sometimes you just have to sit there and listen, but then I'm not sure how to listen if that makes sense. And what do you even do after somebody says something? Nod in agreement? "Uh huh mmhmm"? It always feels odd just sitting there just listening; it looks like I really don't give a hoot what with my lack of responses. also first post cause i've been lurking forever

[QUOTE=hfhdrtrtr;48951835]I've always wondered, how do you guys be there for your friends? Or not even your friends but anyone really? I've always had a problem with never knowing what to do whenever somebody wants to talk about something. I know that sometimes you just have to sit there and listen, but then I'm not sure how to listen if that makes sense. And what do you even do after somebody says something? Nod in agreement? "Uh huh mmhmm"? It always feels odd just sitting there just listening; it looks like I really don't give a hoot what with my lack of responses. also first post cause i've been lurking forever[/QUOTE] You have to be interested when someone is saying something. It really depends on what the other person expects to hear from you. And how you feel comfortable listening or talking. I don't agree with telling your personal experiences and giving advice right away right when someone's venting. I listen in silence and I pay attention. Whenever I feel that the person I'm venting with isn't thinking something through I ask questions and second guess statements. Challenging their ideas. Making them re-evaluate them. I never tell people what to do. There's no one else more capable of making decisions than yourself. So you'll never hear "just breakup with her" or "do this", "do that" specifically. There's nothing you can do to directly change what someone's feeling. But when you put on questions, after listening for a while, it makes people think. That's what counselors actually do.

been socially absent for a very long time and have recently been introduced to an old group of friends (3 people, there are more but I have yet to be re-introduced to them. I'll refer to the two I'm gonna talk about in this post as A and B.) I used to hang with, though there are a few things I don't fully understand yet. I have a few problems with taking the initiative and feeling like I'm being way too pushy. I don't think I've been very pushy so far, I've only asked one of them once if they wanted to meet up and another of them if they wanted to meet up and if I could join a cinema that her and two others were gonna see which I was included in. I have a feeling they like me which I don't want to ruin. right now I'm not sure if it's appropriate to contact any of them. I'm feeling bored and lonely so I'd love to meet up with any of them, but I know A has had a fairly busy day so I won't bother asking her. that leaves me with my last option who I'm a little afraid to contact since I don't want to come off as pushy. I've been with B and her boyfriend the 7th or 8th of October, was with all 3 on the 14th, 16th, and 17th then I was with B and boyfriend the 18th. I slept over from 16th to the 18th. since then I've contacted both of these people once since, which I believe was on Monday. I also sent a message to both on Tuesday, though that was to tell A to contact me once she felt better and B was to ask if I could join the cinema this weekend which I was told was happening by A and A said she'd love for me to join. how often is it okay to ask someone to hang out? if I contact them a few times, maybe I should wait until I hear from them again? really don't want to become too clingy or not giving them enough space. I feel like I'm over thinking the entire situation, but I'm just so scared I'll drift apart from them again. I don't think they dislike me since they're the ones who have taken the initiative to bring me back when I've been gone for up to a year at the time. I just haven't been very good at taking the initiative back and said no to spend time with them too many times. now I've been given an golden opportunity to become social again and I'm so scared to lose them like the last couple of times.

Anyone else get tired of college? It's not even my course load that's making me feel awful. I feel apathetic towards the atmosphere I'm in. I'm a junior in CS, constantly tired, stressed, and really feel my blood pressure go up each time I deal with coworkers/exams/etc. I know that in "the real world you'll always have to put up with shitty bosses and shitty coworkers". So basically my former Vietnam vet boss retired from the college. Which seemed alright and all, up until my new boss is an academic adviser who hired a student worker for a significant amount of money. This student gets titled, "Leader of The College of Engineering and Computer Science." Her job is : 1. Forward emails back and forth about what is going on in our university help rooms and tutors. 2. She schedules workers. This upset everyone I was working with, myself included. So I took it upon myself to write a nifty little email ticketing service that does her job for her. On top of that, I made a digital sign in sheet so we can collect data on what sorts of people are coming into the help rooms. Fun fact, we used paper copy, no one bothered to look through the papers to tell us what the hell was going on. I show this to the Dean and he's all like,"Well shit son, this is good, let's compensate you for your time." I'm happy, but I decline because I didn't want them to buy something in beta that isn't guaranteed to always work. Luckily, we've been using my system for a month and it's all been kosher. I get everyone together at the beginning of the month for a meeting. Some 50 people, my boss, our glorious leader, and the Dean all in the same lecture hall while I stand there giving my presentation about how we can expand our horizons as a tutoring service. Our boss got up next to me to talk about bullshit policies about how we're supposed to behave. No headphones, 15 minutes to a student, and don't teach them anything even if the lab is due that very night, because it's their fault. So I chew her out and say, "While, I agree with you that we need to be respectful of our students, these policies aren't conducive to learning and are more harmful than good." Shit got super surreal, people cheered and clapped about what I am doing. Honestly, I never felt so good about anything in my entire life. So now my boss writes to me now about how to do things. Which is awesome! If I'm being honest, I'm a terrible student. On top of that, I've got a group of people who think I'm their leader. Which is cool, but I'm not getting paid, I'm not claiming more hours than them, and I'm doing this all on my free time. I'm also considering switching to the "less math" track of cs because ironically I'm not the greatest of students. I'm worried that by declaring as BA in cs as opposed to a BS I'll lose my backing with the Dean and my boss. On top of that, whenever I try to bring it up with my social group inside the help room, they take a sense of pride in that I'm inferior or something. This is why I'm posting here: I'm struggling with is my perception of myself to others. I'm worried that by switching majors, I'll lose my job, and I love teaching/tutoring. I constantly feel like I should hide under a rock I get so anxious, but I know full well I can't.

[QUOTE=blacksam;48954820]I'm also considering switching to the "less math" track of cs because ironically I'm not the greatest of students. I'm worried that by declaring as BA in cs as opposed to a BS I'll lose my backing with the Dean and my boss. On top of that, whenever I try to bring it up with my social group inside the help room, they take a sense of pride in that I'm inferior or something. This is why I'm posting here: I'm struggling with is my perception of myself to others. I'm worried that by switching majors, I'll lose my job, and I love teaching/tutoring. I constantly feel like I should hide under a rock I get so anxious, but I know full well I can't.[/QUOTE] First, that's awesome that you stood up to your boss and earned her respect by doing so. When it comes to helping others on your free time, even though it feels good to do so, you need to remember that nobody else is pressuring you to take on these roles. You've shown other people that you want to take on more responsibilities, help them out in your free time etc. If you showed people that you don't have the time to take on extra responsibilities, they might be initially hurt, but they would ultimately understand and stop viewing you this way. As for your major, it depends on your reasoning. Admittedly I don't know much about compsci or what the impact of changing your major will be career-wise for you. But don't switch your major if your only reasoning is to have an easier time at school. You're a junior, you've got less than two years of hard work to go. College classes are hard because most of us aren't naturally motivated to learn things at as efficient of a pace as college classes force us to. If you weren't taking advanced math classes it's likely you would never find the time or motivation to actually learn those subjects in the future. I don't know how relevant your classes are to your future career, but if there is any benefit to continuing with advanced math, work hard now and enjoy the benefit of it a year or two from now when you've finished all of your classes.

[QUOTE=Guy Mannly;48954932]First, that's awesome that you stood up to your boss and earned her respect by doing so. When it comes to helping others on your free time, even though it feels good to do so, you need to remember that nobody else is pressuring you to take on these roles. You've shown other people that you want to take on more responsibilities, help them out in your free time etc. If you showed people that you don't have the time to take on extra responsibilities, they might be initially hurt, but they would ultimately understand and stop viewing you this way. As for your major, it depends on your reasoning. Admittedly I don't know much about compsci or what the impact of changing your major will be career-wise for you. But don't switch your major if your only reasoning is to have an easier time at school. You're a junior, you've got less than two years of hard work to go. College classes are hard because most of us aren't naturally motivated to learn things at as efficient of a pace as college classes force us to. If you weren't taking advanced math classes it's likely you would never find the time or motivation to actually learn those subjects in the future. I don't know how relevant your classes are to your future career, but if there is any benefit to continuing with advanced math, work hard now and enjoy the benefit of it a year or two from now when you've finished all of your classes.[/QUOTE] You're totally right in regards to the social aspect. I'm mainly frustrated with how inconsistent I am in terms of motivation. See I started off as a film production major, switched to cs because I liked the people. These were people who were solving problems, not arguing whether or not Fast and Furious should be considered a good movie. So I left the film program and hopped on the CS train. Staying as a BS though I spend an extra semester trying to finish my degree. When it's something I love doing, whether it be shooting video or programming, I spend countless hours just doing it. There's just this, "in the zone" vibe. I get the same with math sometimes too when I hit up khan academy. I'm fighting my math demons. I'm going to get a tutor, talk with my profs and see if I can accomplish it. The advantage to taking the BA over the BS is that there are some really shitty tenured faculty that I don't have to put up with. To profs who say "lol just google it" to the discrete logic professor who said he was "in Turkey for a conference" but was actually in his office writing a grant so he cancelled the review for his exam. I guess in terms of an education, I'm tired of dealing with people who aren't teachers. The BA frees me to choose cool shit like distributed systems, cyber security, bioinformatics, and etc without having to deter my attention to taking an extra laboratory science. I've talked with my mentors about this and they remind me that it may put myself at a disadvantage when it comes to hiring, but even then it's a slight disadvantage. Reminding me that I'll prove myself with my portfolio and my problem solving. Sorry this isn't the usual Love Advice. I'm trying to ask myself out, but I usually end up getting super drunk and texting myself, "u up?" while crying into a jar of nutella.

[QUOTE=blacksam;48956665]You're totally right in regards to the social aspect. I'm mainly frustrated with how inconsistent I am in terms of motivation. See I started off as a film production major, switched to cs because I liked the people. These were people who were solving problems, not arguing whether or not Fast and Furious should be considered a good movie. So I left the film program and hopped on the CS train. Staying as a BS though I spend an extra semester trying to finish my degree. When it's something I love doing, whether it be shooting video or programming, I spend countless hours just doing it. There's just this, "in the zone" vibe. I get the same with math sometimes too when I hit up khan academy. I'm fighting my math demons. I'm going to get a tutor, talk with my profs and see if I can accomplish it. The advantage to taking the BA over the BS is that there are some really shitty tenured faculty that I don't have to put up with. To profs who say "lol just google it" to the discrete logic professor who said he was "in Turkey for a conference" but was actually in his office writing a grant so he cancelled the review for his exam. I guess in terms of an education, I'm tired of dealing with people who aren't teachers. The BA frees me to choose cool shit like distributed systems, cyber security, bioinformatics, and etc without having to deter my attention to taking an extra laboratory science. I've talked with my mentors about this and they remind me that it may put myself at a disadvantage when it comes to hiring, but even then it's a slight disadvantage. Reminding me that I'll prove myself with my portfolio and my problem solving. Sorry this isn't the usual Love Advice. I'm trying to ask myself out, but I usually end up getting super drunk and texting myself, "u up?" while crying into a jar of nutella.[/QUOTE] Weirdly I started with film and ended up in CS for exactly the same reason

On the subject of college majors, how'd you guys come to decide what to go for? I have a lot of interests in nature in general but I can't really decide whatd be good for me. Geophysicist, if that's even a real job idk, is what I've heavily considered but I figure the job prospects are essentially zero. To be a little more specific, if you've struggled to find your study that you're now passionate about, mind sharing how you discovered it?

[QUOTE=blerb;48958745]On the subject of college majors, how'd you guys come to decide what to go for? I have a lot of interests in nature in general but I can't really decide whatd be good for me. Geophysicist, if that's even a real job idk, is what I've heavily considered but I figure the job prospects are essentially zero. To be a little more specific, if you've struggled to find your study that you're now passionate about, mind sharing how you discovered it?[/QUOTE] Well, I was between chemical engineering and medicine. The former was my passion, but had uncertain job prospects, the latter I was 'eh' about but had guaranteed financial stability. After a lot of persuasion from my parents, I ended up choosing medschool.

[QUOTE=blerb;48958745]On the subject of college majors, how'd you guys come to decide what to go for? I have a lot of interests in nature in general but I can't really decide whatd be good for me. Geophysicist, if that's even a real job idk, is what I've heavily considered but I figure the job prospects are essentially zero. To be a little more specific, if you've struggled to find your study that you're now passionate about, mind sharing how you discovered it?[/QUOTE] [b]don't go to college for fun[/b] your major should be something employable. ASK YOUR ADVISOR about career prospects. DO NOT go to college without doing research. You'd want to inspect a house before you buy it, right? Your education is going to have a huge impact on the rest of your life. geo-anything usually ends up working for oil or mining companies. Get in touch with these companies. Speak with their hiring managers. Ask them about the field, about what kind of degrees they prefer, and what their hiring process is like and what a workday is like for the average worker. Be careful with petroleum engineering - it can potentially pay extremely well, but everyone else found out about that a few years back and it may be a less promising major now. You might also consider forestry or agricultural engineering. Again - speak with people in the field. Forestry can be awesome, but it may not be a field with many openings. Get in touch with your local state(provincial?) agencies, ask questions, and pay attention to answers. How many people do they employ? How many applicants do they get? You may also consider the military. Canada's pulling out of afghanistan, so now is probably a safe time to join up. You can potentially learn a lot of trade skills in the military. Be warned, recruiters are liars.

[QUOTE=Sector 7;48960715][b]don't go to college for fun[/b] your major should be something employable. ASK YOUR ADVISOR about career prospects. DO NOT go to college without doing research. You'd want to inspect a house before you buy it, right? Your education is going to have a huge impact on the rest of your life. geo-anything usually ends up working for oil or mining companies. Get in touch with these companies. Speak with their hiring managers. Ask them about the field, about what kind of degrees they prefer, and what their hiring process is like and what a workday is like for the average worker. Be careful with petroleum engineering - it can potentially pay extremely well, but everyone else found out about that a few years back and it may be a less promising major now. You might also consider forestry or agricultural engineering. Again - speak with people in the field. Forestry can be awesome, but it may not be a field with many openings. Get in touch with your local state(provincial?) agencies, ask questions, and pay attention to answers. How many people do they employ? How many applicants do they get? You may also consider the military. Canada's pulling out of afghanistan, so now is probably a safe time to join up. You can potentially learn a lot of trade skills in the military. Be warned, recruiters are liars.[/QUOTE] Oil and gas industr is really up the shitter right now, it may pick up by the time you're done with college but it's a real risk tbh [editline]22nd October 2015[/editline] Also, I don't know about other countries, but in the UK you should definitely go to uni for fun. As someone who works for a prestigious engineering firm and works on the side in graduate recruitment I can tell you in a choice between a 2:1 who has been out and about doing other things whilst at uni and a straight first class student who has never left their room, the 2:1 has a much better case for us employing them