Super Friendly Social and Love Advice v7 - Bro just do it, She prob likes you - General

[QUOTE=Kirbyfactor;49001791]Got a date on friday with a girl I met on tinder. Im pretty nervous for it[/QUOTE] So my pics show me as a long haired dude but literally 10 minutes ago I got it cut short. I sent her a snapchat of it and she said it was really short. You think this is going to be a problem?

I am a bit dissapointed that I am not going to my college graduation but also kinda happy at same time, not sure, it's kind of mixed feeling. From one side (Pros): 1) I don't have to pay 70 euro for graduation ceremony. 2) I am using all my holiday days at work to go to a holiday I wanted since I was a kid (Snowboarding) to France. (If I was to use one of holiday days for graduation day, I wouldn't be able to go on holiday) 3) I don't have to sit through hours of waiting. 4) I suppose I have very very big motivation to go do Masters Degree as I want to get one of those photos in robes in Graduation, since I am skipping this one, I can't so only option - Do Masters degree to get it. (kinda stupid reason I guess) From other side (Cons): 1) Well, I don't know are there any cons of not going, I guess #4 of pros is one con. Literally the only reason I wanted to go to graduation is to get photo taken, no other reason. But I guess I can deal with it. Anybody skipped their graduation?

[QUOTE=arleitiss;49007123] Anybody skipped their graduation?[/QUOTE] Kind of. Our ceremony was pretty nonexistent because of the student strikes that were still taking place. But we did our on celebration with our teacher by going to the pub and getting wrecked with him which was really fun. [B]Edited:[/B] Speaking of college we had some roleplay session thing earlier. I asked to opt out since, for one, I hate roleplay the same as almost anyone else, and second because I'm still subjected to panic attacks whenever I do any kind of presentation or public speaking. I find it strange how when I'm actually doing the real thing (serving actual customers in the canteen or the bar) I'm comfortable with it since I just go by instinct. But any kind of mock task just gets me all anxious.

[QUOTE=Kirbyfactor;49007084]So my pics show me as a long haired dude but literally 10 minutes ago I got it cut short. I sent her a snapchat of it and she said it was really short. You think this is going to be a problem?[/QUOTE] I doubt it's that big of a deal.

[QUOTE=_Axel;49008259]I doubt it's that big of a deal.[/QUOTE] Unless she likes to use a strap-on and use the guy's long hair as reins. Just trying to convey all the possible scenarios, really.

I reconnected with some chick I liked that I was friends with in middle school The other day I send her a picture of me in my new big boss eyepatch (didn't even know if she liked MG or not) and got instantly spammed with ocelot x snake pics/comics I gotta ask this chick out shiiiiit I think I'm gonna ease into it with hanging out again. Only problem is ATT gives her a "invalid number" when she texts me and she has no wifi at home so we only get to talk through iMessage while she's at work

My girlfriends parents are putting so much strain on our relationship, they are really strict asian parents and she gets a nice massive lecture and etc every time I drop her home when she sees me, ends up in tears and whatnot basically every time. Tonight things seem so much worse than usual, she's just shutting down on me completely and I feel absolutely powerless, its the most horrible thing ever. I get the feeling by some of the stuff she's said that shes got doubts about us seeding in her mind too... I really don't want anything to go wrong this is eating away at me.

[QUOTE=Kindlinho;49009371]Unless she likes to use a strap-on and use the guy's long hair as reins. Just trying to convey all the possible scenarios, really.[/QUOTE] I regret cutting it off now

[QUOTE=orcywoo6;49010061]My girlfriends parents are putting so much strain on our relationship, they are really strict asian parents and she gets a nice massive lecture and etc every time I drop her home when she sees me, ends up in tears and whatnot basically every time. Tonight things seem so much worse than usual, she's just shutting down on me completely and I feel absolutely powerless, its the most horrible thing ever. I get the feeling by some of the stuff she's said that shes got doubts about us seeding in her mind too... I really don't want anything to go wrong this is eating away at me.[/QUOTE] Have you two thought about moving out?

[QUOTE=fruxodaily;49012136]Have you two thought about moving out?[/QUOTE] It's funny you should say that, she finally came around to her senses last night and we had that exact discussion, I literally just got a new job which is much higher paid thanks to my experience, so I can afford a place, it looks like we may go ahead with it.

My friend is drunk and is going on his nazi rants again. Does anyone have any experience in dealing with fucking narcissistic lunatics? What do you even do when your friend tells you hitler saved their life? Edit: Now he's telling me he was hitler in another life. Why do I always end up meeting the worst fucking people imaginable.

I got way too drunk last night (I drank half a glass of red wine before realizing it was actually red wine vinegar, holy fuck) and I'm pretty certain I said a bunch of really stupid, embarassing shit to my friend and his parents. Completely destroyed their bathroom with vomit, too. All in all, I made an ass of myself. I feel awful about it. What would be a good way to make it up to them? I was thinking of just tossing some money their way but that feels like a bit of a cop-out to me, especially considering this is the 3rd time it's happened the past 2 years.

I'm not sure what thread to post this in, and honestly, I just don't care anymore. I need to fucking talk about it. About a year ago, I got out of a really bad relationship. I ended up breaking up with a girl after months of arguing and general relationship problems. Up until that point, it was the most committed relationship I'd ever been in, and it lasted over a year. I lost my virginity to this girl, and she lost hers to mine. During this relationship, she kissed a few other boys, was constantly ragging on me about spending time with friends, yelled and insulted me over issues not even my fault, and I felt fucking awful. I believed every word she said, and was legitimately afraid of her. I was constantly fearing setting off an explosion of anger against me, followed by a emotional breakdown by both of us. Me, being the huge emotional baby I am (diagnosed with depression, anxiety, and insomnia), started flinching occasionally when she made sudden movements, despite her only lightly hitting me a couple times out of frustration (outside of teasingly). Obviously, this was a bad relationship and eventually, I managed to end it. About a week and a few days after breaking up, in admittedly a scumbag kind of move, I started dating my wonderful girlfriend I have now. We love each other a lot, and haven't had a single argument! We've helped each other through sadness and discussed our problems if anything came up, rather than fighting. It's fantastic and I wouldn't trade her for the world. I still have a problem though. During the middle/tail end of my last relationship, there were several times where we had sex just to make her feel better. I wasn't always fully comfortable with this, and just went a long with it just to avoid conflict. If I said I wasn't in the mood, she would get angry with me and blame herself as well. On one occasion, I burst into tears when she was feeling me up, and cue the expected meltdown. I've had to do it while my friends were waiting in my car outside her house a few times, before I was able to go home without sadness pretty much every day, and whenever I felt bad or she felt bad, that was her solution. I hated it. I honestly don't even remember the actual act itself, I just remember wanting to get it over with and go home. On top of that, there were about 3 pregnancy scares where I had borderline suicidal panic attacks. My sex drive crashed and burned and I lost all interest in romantic and sexual relations. I would still masturbate to porn and still enjoyed fantasies and stuff, but never actual sex for some reason. About half a year into my relationship with my current girlfriend, my sex drive was again falling. Now, I still have this problem. I just am hardly ever in the mood for sex, and can usually only be coerced into it with lots of romantic buildup. My current girlfriend doesn't blame me and she is very understanding (I love her for it so much). Occasionally she still gets sad or frustrated about it, for obvious reasons, but I can hardly blame her. It's pretty important to a relationship. What happened to me? I'm terrified of sex sometimes and I my drive for it has flat-lined. I don't understand it. My girlfriend is aware about all of this, and personally believes I was raped, but that sounds too extreme for what happened to me. I might have been emotionally abused a bit, but that's all I think. I don't want to compare my trivial problems to someone who's been violated to such a personal degree. We we're mostly just not meant for each other in my opinion, and sparks flew whenever we tried to make it work. I come to you guys because I don't know what else to do. I don't want to be afraid of sex anymore, and I was to want it again. I'm just so fucking terrified of something bad happening. What should I do?

[QUOTE=soccerskyman;49019504]I'm not sure what thread to post this in, and honestly, I just don't care anymore. I need to fucking talk about it.[/QUOTE] first off, abuse isn't a competition that you can win or lose. she tried to guilt you (either through deprecating you or herself) into sex that you didn't want, and if she succeeded, then you may as well call it rape. the sheer fact that it's had lasting effects on you that spanned into the next relationship is proof enough for that, in my opinion. the only separation you have from more serious rape victims is that they could probably create a more solid case in court, but don't let that convince you that what you suffered is insignificant. as for your sex drive issue, don't try to force it. while sex is an important part in most relationships, she'll probably be able to recognize your reluctance if you agree to sex that you're not actually feeling up to. if you're still masturbating, try to go a while without, and act on/communicate any desires you may get from that deprivation. you say a lot of romantic buildup helps you to get in the mood; don't be afraid to drag out the foreplay a bit. and if you're just not feeling it by the time it starts to get stale, help her finish herself off. the message that her pleasure is your top priority should do wonders to keeping your relationship strong while i certainly haven't gone through what you have, i also have sort of a problem with my sex drive, and i find those steps really helped both me and my fiance to be more comfortable with that.

[QUOTE=carcarcargo;49019183]My friend is drunk and is going on his nazi rants again. Does anyone have any experience in dealing with fucking narcissistic lunatics? What do you even do when your friend tells you hitler saved their life? Edit: Now he's telling me he was hitler in another life. Why do I always end up meeting the worst fucking people imaginable.[/QUOTE] i shared a room with this conspiracy theorist guy for about a year and a half. eventually you become a master of deflecting conversations when he turns to you at 2am in the middle of a club to tell you that the catholic church controls everything

[QUOTE=Zukriuchen;49019888]i shared a room with this conspiracy theorist guy for about a year and a half. eventually you become a master of deflecting conversations when he turns to you at 2am in the middle of a club to tell you that the catholic church controls everything[/QUOTE] Well in the end I just blocked him, I thought he'd grown out of this but no, we're right back to 4 years ago. I wish he I could say he's just joking but he's really really not. I have enough problems to deal with, without dealing with the second coming of the god damn fuhrer.

I’m talking to this girl I met on a dating site for almost a week now. I asked her out on wednesday for thursday and she said “I would but have plans sorry :( maybe another time” but we’ve still been texting since then, and she’s the one who originally messaged me to start off with and she’s the one who asked for my Facebook / number on the site. I now have her on Facebook since then. On my dating profile I said I was looking for a relationship as did she. I would normally take what she said as a ‘no’ but everything else suggests that she likes me. When should I ask again and when for?

[QUOTE=soccerskyman;49019504]What happened to me? I'm terrified of sex sometimes and I my drive for it has flat-lined. I don't understand it. My girlfriend is aware about all of this, and personally believes I was raped, but that sounds too extreme for what happened to me. I might have been emotionally abused a bit, but that's all I think. I don't want to compare my trivial problems to someone who's been violated to such a personal degree. We we're mostly just not meant for each other in my opinion, and sparks flew whenever we tried to make it work. I come to you guys because I don't know what else to do. I don't want to be afraid of sex anymore, and I was to want it again. I'm just so fucking terrified of something bad happening. What should I do?[/QUOTE] That's the textbook definition of rape, no wonder why you are afraid of sex. I'd suggest that you should go see a therapist man, he will help you to cope with it and fix this problem. Also, it's great that your girlfriend understands you and supports you, I'm sure she will make it much easier.

[QUOTE=_Axel;49008259]I doubt it's that big of a deal.[/QUOTE] Wasn't a big deal at all. Date went fucking amazing, we drank a couple of beers and then went to her place. Her parents didnt know I was there so I had to stay in her room until everyone was gone :v:

Went to my first party last night, and got drunk for the first time. It was with everyone from my scholars program -- mostly a bunch of kids who get good grades but also like to fucking party. I don't usually get to go out to stuff like this because of my parents, but it was so much fun, and I never realized how hilarious it is watching/playing foosball wasted. Aslo, talking to hot girls is 10x easier this way.

[QUOTE=dnqboy;49020730]Went to my first party last night, and got drunk for the first time. [/QUOTE] Unrelated possibly-unwarranted advice/info but I'd suggest the first few times you drink to do it at home or with trusted friends, not at a party. It went well for you, and it very well could continue like that, but I and many others probably could attest to the fact that it's better to be with good company the first couple times. Getting used to and comfortable with whatever substance you use before doing it outside of a controlled environment is always best and as someone who's just started drinking, it's really easy to get carried away and drink too much, so another benefit is that you get to know your limits and what you can handle. Not sure if that's a good suggestion or what but it was good advice when it was told to me, and it was even better advice after I didn't completely listen to it.

It was only like two dozen or so people, all of which I knew and we were all looking out for one another, plus some of them were sober. But yeah I agree, I wouldn't risk going to a party full of strangers.

I donno it was something I just thought briefly about and it didn't really have much relation to the post you made, you didn't have much to do with the thought other than mentioning you got drunk for the first time. It just reminded me of my mixed bag of a first year in college. People rate me dumb but I've had some shitty times at booze filled parties with people I didn't know, doing stupid shit without realizing I was actually drunk enough to where my judgement was that bad. I'd just hate for others to go through the same thing if at all possible, so I mentioned it in passing. I'll stop posting now :3

[QUOTE=E1025;49020311]I’m talking to this girl I met on a dating site for almost a week now. I asked her out on wednesday for thursday and she said “I would but have plans sorry :( maybe another time” but we’ve still been texting since then, and she’s the one who originally messaged me to start off with and she’s the one who asked for my Facebook / number on the site. I now have her on Facebook since then. On my dating profile I said I was looking for a relationship as did she. I would normally take what she said as a ‘no’ but everything else suggests that she likes me. When should I ask again and when for?[/QUOTE] Textbook busy schedule dating man. Don't stress. You've shown your interest. Don't try and guess when she's free, ask. [editline]31st October 2015[/editline] As for the partying side of this I'd suggest never partying without a wingman. Good to have someone that's got your back if shit gets fucky, even if they're as drunk as you at least they're trustworty.

[QUOTE=soccerskyman;49019504]What happened to me? I'm terrified of sex sometimes and I my drive for it has flat-lined. I don't understand it. My girlfriend is aware about all of this, and personally believes I was raped, but that sounds too extreme for what happened to me. I might have been emotionally abused a bit, but that's all I think. I don't want to compare my trivial problems to someone who's been violated to such a personal degree. We we're mostly just not meant for each other in my opinion, and sparks flew whenever we tried to make it work. I come to you guys because I don't know what else to do. I don't want to be afraid of sex anymore, and I was to want it again. I'm just so fucking terrified of something bad happening. What should I do?[/QUOTE] I'm so sorry you went through that. What you experienced was definitely an abusive relationship, and it sounds like you've developed a sexual aversion because of the negative experiences you've had with sex. There's no need to trivialize what you experienced - it has clearly affected you deeply. I would strongly recommend speaking to a counselor about this ASAP. Psychotherapy is probably your best route in dealing with your experiences, and in dealing with trauma it is much more effective if your experiences were recent. The important thing in dealing with trauma is to actively try to think and talk about happened - it may be uncomfortable, but ultimately you need to process what you experienced. Psychotherapy will help you change how you interpret these events and separate the sexual experiences you had with your abusive ex from your perception of sex with others.

I think I might have just made a friends with benefits We agreed to it but we're both hella gone so who knows what she'll think tomorrow?

I found myself the perfect girl, and we've agreed to stick together and let our love grow, but there's a problem on my side. She's really a fan of alcohol, so much that she often drinks 4-5-6 beers at a date or movie night, at casual occasions. I'm growing worried she might turn to alcoholism, she told me she's been down that road before. What do? I don't wanna hurt her by talking about it, but I feel like a jerk for letting her drink at times I'd seem socially unfit.

[QUOTE=Tools;49026123]I found myself the perfect girl, and we've agreed to stick together and let our love grow, but there's a problem on my side. She's really a fan of alcohol, so much that she often drinks 4-5-6 beers at a date or movie night, at casual occasions. I'm growing worried she might turn to alcoholism, she told me she's been down that road before. What do? I don't wanna hurt her by talking about it, but I feel like a jerk for letting her drink at times I'd seem socially unfit.[/QUOTE] If you're out somewhere then having a drink isn't a big deal, if she's drinking on her own or when shes doing nothing at home then you probably need to have a talk with her.

If you are serious about the chick then you should probably talk to her if you think she has a problem, it's important to be open with your partner about things like that. If you seriously think that it's becoming alcoholism you should definitely make her know you are worried but that you are ready to support her in her time of need

There is this girl I we t on a date with a few months back. Everything went well but she was already seeing this other guy and they ended up in a relationship shortly after. But I just noticed her relationship status changed and she's been more flirty lately. I'm feeling pretty good about this.