Super Friendly Social and Love Advice v7 - Bro just do it, She prob likes you - General

[QUOTE=based;49110168]I was thinking of asking if she wanted lunch together sometime because its so loud where she is so we can talk, do you think that's a bad idea?[/QUOTE] i dunno whatever you think doesn't seem creepy, i'm terrible at this kind of thing like, people are people, man [sp]so why should it be[/sp] [sp]that you and i should get along so awfully[/sp]

[QUOTE=based;49110168]I was thinking of asking if she wanted lunch together sometime because its so loud where she is so we can talk, do you think that's a bad idea?[/QUOTE] Do you have any evidence that the two of you would be good together or do you just see her from a distance and think she's cute. Because not gonna lie but randomly asking someone if they want to go out while they're at work is like a super bad idea.

ye usually you don't just ask out everyone you think is cute

[QUOTE=fear me;49110176]i dunno whatever you think doesn't seem creepy, i'm terrible at this kind of thing like, people are people, man [sp]so why should it be[/sp] [sp]that you and i should get along so awfully[/sp][/QUOTE] Depeche? I'm not sure if its creepy or not [editline]13th November 2015[/editline] [QUOTE=RainbowStalin;49110187]Do you have any evidence that the two of you would be good together or do you just see her from a distance and think she's cute. Because not gonna lie but randomly asking someone if they want to go out while they're at work is like a super bad idea.[/QUOTE] She's cute and she's given me the eye if you knowimsayin I just want to find out what she's like though first

[QUOTE=based;49110199]given me the eye[/QUOTE] don't assume these things m8e

her JOB is to be nice to you

No but really I just want to speak to her even if it ends up us just being acquaintances because she's in my age group

[QUOTE=based;49110223]No but really I just want to speak to her even if it ends up us just being acquaintances because she's in my age group[/QUOTE] then say hi and introduce yourself, if it goes nowhere take your sammich and leave [editline]13th November 2015[/editline] speaking of which how do i speak to women without them thinking i'm some sort of horrible serial rapist cause i have no social skills

I'm sure this has been said in one way or another a billion times, but it really is key to avoid sounding desperate. How do you avoid sounding desperate? Don't lavish attention on one girl and smother her in text messages; it adds to your "mystique" if you don't lay everything on the line. Again, I most certainly can't speak for all women/men but some of them really seem to like excitement/something new. If you make yourself too available then it really isn't that exciting to talk to you or meet up with you. It's some basic shitty human psychology but we really do place more value on things that are scarce, and this is often unconscious. Why is gold or any other precious metal valuable? Well they are shiny (so is brass!), but more importantly they are rare. We like to feel like what we have is a commodity, something special that nobody else has. Most people wouldn't claim that they "own" people, but time spent with someone can definitely be a commodity that is valued. Now I get it, you only really have this one person to talk to and it's hard to avoid sending them too much because of course you want some reciprocal attention too. This is probably the hardest part to balance, and really the best solution is to just talk to so many people that you literally cannot pay any individual that much attention. That is seriously the impression you are trying to make, that your time is so demanded by others that you and your time are a hot commodity, damn it! Now obviously this isn't an option for everyone, everyone has social networks of differing size. Lo and behold there is a sort of viable solution to this, online dating and aps such as tinder (EWW, but seriously stay with me) that allow you to potentially talk to numerous people. Now granted, this takes time. You have to be patient, nothing good comes easy, and it might take a while until you are able to reach out to that many people. But when you do, man you are king of the world and your confidence will shoot through the roof. Suddenly, people will be wanting to talk to you and it is not just you petitioning people for their time! At the very least speaking to a lot of people will increase your skill at conversation. Seriously, it's a skill. You'll get a good feel for what kind of conversation (COMPLETELY DEPENDS ON THE PEOPLE YOU TALK TO NOTHING IS A GOLD STANDARD PEOPLE ARE INDIVIDUALS!!) tends to keep people interested. If you'll allow me an anecdote, I really enjoy conversations where I can entertain or make people laugh. That's usually my goal. If they can make me laugh as well, well damn now I'm really intrigued. Conversation does not have to be boring, I guess that's all I'm really saying. I can't stress enough though that people are individuals and how you are able to adapt to that in conversation will make or break your ability to have good conversations with multiple people. It's all about learning about the other person! Now I should mention that this should really only apply to trying to meet people and making them interested in you, if you're in a relationship then good God man give your partner some love. Please let me know if I'm just a crazy asshole, sometimes I feel like I know what's going on but often then I'm mistaken. I'm not arrogant enough to assume my words have any merit.

snip

[QUOTE=Sector 7;49110477]asdf[/QUOTE] wasd?

Damnit facepunch, I think I fucked up. So there's this girl, Sophie. All you need to know for the context of this story is that I like her, and I'm positive she likes me, but I haven't really asked her out yet. Anyways, I get a call from her tonight. Her and her friends apparently got locked out of her car outside, where it's kind of unsafe. She called to ask if I would drive over and let them stay in my car while they waited for a locksmith to open the car. I said yes, because I cared about her safety. So I got out of bed, got my clothes on; she calls again. She says the guy will be coming soon, and I didn't need to come if I didn't want to. I told her I did because I wanted to make sure they were safe. Then I RAN from my dorm, to the parking garage, up 4 flights of stairs, to my car. When I got to my car, she calls me; the guy came, I didn't need to come anymore. Cue me being out of breath and in full rage mode. I say over the phone "*heavy breathing* well I'm glad you're safe... You guys owe me big time. haha take care!" They said thanks for responding and stuff and they appreciate it, and we said bye. I walked back to my dorm, and texted Sophie "You fucking owe me." (this is where I fucked up) She then texts me that I was being a jerk, and that's when I realized II made a mistake. I proceed to tell her what happened and why I responded so harshly, and that I was a total douchebag and asswipe. I asked her to forgive me and I offered to buy her dinner. She hasn't responded yet. What are the chances that I completely fucked this relationship up? Tell me I'm overreacting.

[QUOTE=NixNax123;49114178]Damnit facepunch, I think I fucked up. So there's this girl, Sophie. All you need to know for the context of this story is that I like her, and I'm positive she likes me, but I haven't really asked her out yet. Anyways, I get a call from her tonight. Her and her friends apparently got locked out of her car outside, where it's kind of unsafe. She called to ask if I would drive over and let them stay in my car while they waited for a locksmith to open the car. I said yes, because I cared about her safety. So I got out of bed, got my clothes on; she calls again. She says the guy will be coming soon, and I didn't need to come if I didn't want to. I told her I did because I wanted to make sure they were safe. Then I RAN from my dorm, to the parking garage, up 4 flights of stairs, to my car. When I got to my car, she calls me; the guy came, I didn't need to come anymore. Cue me being out of breath and in full rage mode. I say over the phone "*heavy breathing* well I'm glad you're safe... You guys owe me big time. haha take care!" They said thanks for responding and stuff and they appreciate it, and we said bye. I walked back to my dorm, and texted Sophie "You fucking owe me." (this is where I fucked up) She then texts me that I was being a jerk, and that's when I realized II made a mistake. I proceed to tell her what happened and why I responded so harshly, and that I was a total douchebag and asswipe. I asked her to forgive me and I offered to buy her dinner. She hasn't responded yet. What are the chances that I completely fucked this relationship up? Tell me I'm overreacting.[/QUOTE] pretty bad managed to sound like a fuckboi with the text but i'd wait to see what she said because maybe it's not that bad

[QUOTE=NixNax123;49114178]Damnit facepunch, I think I fucked up. So there's this girl, Sophie. All you need to know for the context of this story is that I like her, and I'm positive she likes me, but I haven't really asked her out yet. Anyways, I get a call from her tonight. Her and her friends apparently got locked out of her car outside, where it's kind of unsafe. She called to ask if I would drive over and let them stay in my car while they waited for a locksmith to open the car. I said yes, because I cared about her safety. So I got out of bed, got my clothes on; she calls again. She says the guy will be coming soon, and I didn't need to come if I didn't want to. I told her I did because I wanted to make sure they were safe. Then I RAN from my dorm, to the parking garage, up 4 flights of stairs, to my car. When I got to my car, she calls me; the guy came, I didn't need to come anymore. Cue me being out of breath and in full rage mode. I say over the phone "*heavy breathing* well I'm glad you're safe... You guys owe me big time. haha take care!" They said thanks for responding and stuff and they appreciate it, and we said bye. I walked back to my dorm, and texted Sophie "You fucking owe me." (this is where I fucked up) She then texts me that I was being a jerk, and that's when I realized II made a mistake. I proceed to tell her what happened and why I responded so harshly, and that I was a total douchebag and asswipe. I asked her to forgive me and I offered to buy her dinner. She hasn't responded yet. What are the chances that I completely fucked this relationship up? Tell me I'm overreacting.[/QUOTE] well all you can do is wait and see if she'll take you up on dinner. But I think if she doesn't you might want to back off a bit because while its not a major fuckup it is a fuckup lol Like she felt unsafe and she got help and you didn't even really do anything, she got help and then you told you owed her and she categorically does not owe you anything for it because you didn't show up, regardless of it being because somebody else showed up quicker [editline]14th November 2015[/editline] but yeah, its not great...

God DAMNIT. FUCK MY SHORT TERM EMOTIONS FUCK [editline]14th November 2015[/editline] There goes all my fucking sleep tonight. I hate myself [editline]14th November 2015[/editline] I was doing SO GOOD WITH HER. I won her two goddamn stuffed animals from the claw machine a few nights ago. She was happy with me! And I just fucked this all up. I'm fucking pathetic

it's not all fucked up, it was just a single fuck up which happens sometimes you guys have known each other for longer than this one occurrence and one time shouldn't ruin everything, especially since you meant it as more of a joke(i think) you didn't set off the death flag yet

These are the texts by the way: [Quote] (Me) You fucking owe me. (Her) You're being a jerk. (Me) Look, I know I didn't have to come, but believe it or not, you kinda mean a lot to me, so I wanted to make sure you were safe. And I know I sounded mad on the phone, but I had just ran from my door to the 4th level of the parking garage by the stairs. So sorry if I seemed jerkish, but I was just really mad for a second. But I'm glad you guys are alright. (Her) It's literally just the fact that I've had the shittiest night so far. I was scared and cold hence why I called because I was told it'd be 40 minutes until the guy got here Then I told you it probably wasn't worth coming yet you insisted and then you tell I owe you while using profanity. How should I feel about that? (Me)I'm sorry you had a shitty night. I realize I was being a total douchebag now; I was just caught up in the moment, and I wasn't thinking straight. Sorry, that was totally uncalled for, and I feel like a huge asswipe. Forgive me? (Me)Let me buy you dinner next time you're free. How about that? (Me)I seriously feel like shit knowing I made your night worse. I know I totally fucked up and I wanna make it up to you.[/quote] [editline]14th November 2015[/editline] [QUOTE=Fire Kracker;49114222]it's not all fucked up, it was just a single fuck up which happens sometimes you guys have known each other for longer than this one occurrence and one time shouldn't ruin everything, especially since you meant it as more of a joke(i think) you didn't set off the death flag yet[/QUOTE]Thanks, that makes me feel a bit better.

[QUOTE=NixNax123;49114234]These are the texts by the way: [editline]14th November 2015[/editline] Thanks, that makes me feel a bit better.[/QUOTE] yeah you recovered well, just hope its enough [editline]14th November 2015[/editline] dont beat yourself up too much dude. Shit like this happens all the time to loads of people. Don't lose sleep over it

It wasn't that bad, just don't expect her to respond to you right away, she's still a bit angry. Let things cool off. They will, and I'm sure you'll have great opportunities to make it right with her.

Yeah I plan on giving her as much space as she needs, going to the beach with friends today should help clear my mind. A night's sleep also helped, too. Thanks, guys.

The pillow is usually a great counselor.

I used to have real bad anxiety and when I worked at my old work it went away and pretty much stopped me from being depressed but I left that because it was weekends and I now work full time and I have relapsed and I don't feel very good now [editline]14th November 2015[/editline] And k now turn to alcohol for stuff like this but todayd when I went into work it just made me miss it and hiw it changed me as a person [editline]14th November 2015[/editline] I can't be introverted I hate justha ving my own company but now I work in IT and everyone's like it I fell so terriblesorry everyone

Went clubbing with some friends last night and had a blast. I met this super chill chick there and flirted her up for a good half hour. Later that night I found her again and got her number. Thing is, she's six years older than me and was pretty drunk when I got her number. I'm also kind of worried that I waited too long to send her a text because my phone's been dead for almost 24 hours (my charger is on the fritz). I'm kind of wondering with all these odds stacked against me if it's even worth it to try or if I'll be able to keep cool in conversation.

[QUOTE=Paincake;49117452]Went clubbing with some friends last night and had a blast. I met this super chill chick there and flirted her up for a good half hour. Later that night I found her again and got her number. Thing is, she's six years older than me and was pretty drunk when I got her number. I'm also kind of worried that I waited too long to send her a text because my phone's been dead for almost 24 hours (my charger is on the fritz). I'm kind of wondering with all these odds stacked against me if it's even worth it to try or if I'll be able to keep cool in conversation.[/QUOTE] Let's see... If you try, worst case scenario is you'll never see her again. If you do nothing, you'll never see her again. That's a tough one. [editline]15th November 2015[/editline] Seriously I understand you may feel anxious about the whole deal but you've got literally nothing to lose, go for it.

[QUOTE=Paincake;49117452]Went clubbing with some friends last night and had a blast. I met this super chill chick there and flirted her up for a good half hour. Later that night I found her again and got her number. Thing is, she's six years older than me and was pretty drunk when I got her number. I'm also kind of worried that I waited too long to send her a text because my phone's been dead for almost 24 hours (my charger is on the fritz). I'm kind of wondering with all these odds stacked against me if it's even worth it to try or if I'll be able to keep cool in conversation.[/QUOTE] how old are you

I texted her. She gave me a number to a land line. GG :v: [QUOTE=E = MC Hammer;49117689]how old are you[/QUOTE] I'm 19, but I have really bad social anxiety in certain scenarios.

[QUOTE=Paincake;49119445]I texted her. She gave me a number to a land line. GG :v:[/quote] People still use land lines? Is she Amish? Amish people have probably accepted land line phones as canon by now, right? Is that how being Amish works?

[QUOTE=Paincake;49119445]I texted her. She gave me a number to a land line. GG :v: I'm 19, but I have really bad social anxiety in certain scenarios.[/QUOTE] i only asked that because being 6 years older than someone is increasingly less of an issue the older you get 19/25 is a bit weird but honestly that's realy not a huge issue

[QUOTE=E = MC Hammer;49119633]i only asked that because being 6 years older than someone is increasingly less of an issue the older you get 19/25 is a bit weird but honestly that's realy not a huge issue[/QUOTE] That's like there's a girl on my course that's 5 years older than me(I'm 18). That's a total no-no, but if she was younger then that would have been a different thing...

why is that a total nono