Super Friendly Social and Love Advice v7 - Bro just do it, She prob likes you - General

I've had a journal for about a year now. I keep it by my bed and write about the things I want to do or what I did. I sleep a lot better because of it. Because sometimes you're like, "Oh shit what if I say this tomorrow during that meeting." or "Holy shit. This burn needs to be on paper so I can use it later." I even have it titled, NUDEs in red pen. Notable upcoming daily events. Anyone can see my nudes. Hell, if the whole office wanted my nudes, I'd give it to them.

[QUOTE=Zenreon117;49680050] I've been there. How I got through it was by looking at my attraction to her as some foreign thing that I have to deal with. I'd let it come, pass, and I talked to her about it. She kinda took a shitty route by actually giving me some hope at one point, sending me pictures and shit, so if anything you should be grateful that your ex isn't doing the same. Just look at it reasonably and try your best to go out and meet new people, even if it's just talking. Lastly, there is nothing wrong with loving her. Just be sure to seperate that from wanting to fuck her/keeping her for yourself. Basically, recognize that it's there, but also recognize that the person that was in that relationship no longer exists. Who you are is coloured by it, but not entirely determined. You just need to take that as part of your life and go on taking care of yourself. Unfortunately you can't force love so the most you can do is just not put yourself and her in a position where you might hurt eachother. Getting out and meeting people sucks, I know. I'm one of the most hard-line introverts I know, probably because introverts rarely go out to meet eachother. Just try to get an activity or something where you will have chances to shift your social life off the shoulders of this girl.[/QUOTE] Thanks for this. I really appreciate it. I consider myself extremely introverted so I can feel pretty awkward sometimes lol. I guess it's something I just need to work on Anyways, quick story; I went out a couple weeks ago to my friend's sushi/bar place. It was a private party thing, so I knew just about everybody. All except for one of the girls who works there. I thought she was pretty cute. Didn't have the courage to talk to her until i had to leave where all I asked was what her name was. Mind you guys, I was quite drunk, so when I did introduce myself I literally forgot her name the second I walked out the door. :suicide: So.. would it be awkward or rude to say something like "hey I forgot your name because i was honestly drunk?" (obviously with a bit more 'fluff' i guess.)

[QUOTE=PenguinKris;49680722] So.. would it be awkward or rude to say something like "hey I forgot your name because i was honestly drunk?" (obviously with a bit more 'fluff' i guess.)[/QUOTE] I often do that in the middle of the same conversation they told me their name while I'm sober. It happens.

[QUOTE=RenegadeCop;49680864]I never remember names in introductions because I'm too focused on my etiquette and pronouncing my name.[/QUOTE] how do you mess up pronouncing your name? [I]alright, alright, just stay focused.. "ren-eh-gayd".. "ren-eh-gayd"... oh shit he asked my name![/I] "I'm uh REENOGADEE" [i]shit shit shit[/i]

[QUOTE=Zenreon117;49680050]Trouble is I'd like to be more than friends - ask her out, but I don't wanna fuck up the cool thing we have going. Do I just say nothing and let things take their course? [/QUOTE] Well fuck nevermind about anything. While I was texting her I got a call from my mom that she won two tickets to a hockey game, and so, being already literally talking to her, obviously first thought was to offer for her to come. 15 minutes later I get a page long text about how when she offered me rides she wanted company and instead she got pressure to hang out even though she is busy. Said she didn't think I'd get so involved and that she doesn't want to hang out or carpool anymore. :suicide: Oh well. Thought she was cool, guess her thinking the same was just me being delusional again. Fuck my luck.

I come bearing another fun tale, Facepunch. Not sure if this one should go here or in the Sex, Girlfriends and Shit thread. I believe I've posted my drunken adventures ITT before. So Friday night, one of my female coworkers was having a party because she decided to quit and wanted to celebrate for one big last goodbye with our small circle of friends. So I showed up, we all started drinking and it was a nice fun time for a couple of hours. Then another one of my female coworkers showed up. I know her a little bit, and we've been out drinking a few times but never for very long. (Note, "very long" for both she and I is like, staying out until 3 AM. Up until Friday night the longest she and I had ever been out drinking was maybe 2 or 3 hours.) WELL, throughout the night she started being all super flirty with me and all teasing like and shit. It started somewhat innocent, casually walking up to me while I was at the bar and dancing on me and chatting, then it became more physical. Since I was already pretty drunk and was losing control of my faculties, I decided it would be an interesting experiment to see how far I could push her before she told me to fuck off. So I put $40 into her cleavage and said "Go buy us some shots." Much to my surprise she said "You missed", grabbed my god damn hand, and stuffed it way down into her bra. I was like "Well that's nice I guess." We started being more physical at that point, the casual dancing turned into literal grinding all up on my junk and it was fun. Much unsolicited groping from myself was permitted and it was nice. She started doing shit like sucking on my fingers, and once again, deciding to see how far I could push her, I thought I'd try pushing my finger a bit deeper into her mouth while she was pressed up against me. She started sucking and licking on it harder and I was like "welp." Eventually, my drunk self decided to try the final push and see what she would do. So me, being the silver-tongued 10 CHA mother fucker that I am said to her with absolute conviction: "You should sit on my face." I was expecting her to either laugh and shrug it off or cease all of the flirtatious advantages she was making. After all, in my mind this was an experiment. However, an unforeseen third option decided to unfold. She grabbed me, pushed me onto the dance floor, and [I]started grinding on my face.[/I] Was not expecting that to happen, at-fucking-all. Then she picked me up and started getting super serious with how she was dancing with me. We eventually decided to go out and smoke, and she started complaining about how cold it was. I told her it wasn't that cold (because it wasn't), and she informed me that her "nipples could cut glass." I said "I don't believe you." And once again, the unexpected happened. She took her titties out and said "Touch them", and I was just like "well if you say so". Results were very conclusive, they definitely could have cut glass. So we went back inside and got back to it. It was all very sexual and she said "I want you to take me home tonight." And then I said it. I guess my luck had to run out some time. My brain decided to consult George Costanza, and I said "Well, I rode here with someone else, so that's not going to happen." Then I started screaming inside my head; "CALL A FUCKING CAB YOU IDIOT". She seemed disappointed, but still kept up with the teasing and flirting she had been doing since she got there. Then the night just kinda ended. We all definitely had a lot of fun, but I was not expecting any of that from her at all. I've been out with her before and never saw that side of her. And she had been doing it since she got there, so initially there was just as much alcohol in her as the other times we've been out. More importantly, all of her friends that I also know have never seen her do anything like that. Now that my professional relationship with her has boarded a plane, got hijacked by the Taliban, and crashed into the twin towers, I'm wondering how things are going to be come Monday. I actually do want to talk to her about it. I definitely think things did get way too out of hand eventually, but I don't think she would have acted the way she did, moderately drunk or not, if she didn't like me. [B]TL;DR[/B] Went out drinking and a girl made huge moves on me. We work together but our interactions are very limited. I'm interested in her. I think she's interested in me. What should I do? THIS HAS NEVER HAPPENED TO ME BEFORE. SEND HELP.

jesus christ dude [editline]7th February 2016[/editline] i literally don't even know how you salvage that

oh man im really glad i read that [editline]d[/editline] you're a good storyteller lmao [quote]My brain decided to consult George Costanza, and I said "Well, I rode here with someone else, so that's not going to happen." Then I started screaming inside my head; "CALL A FUCKING CAB YOU IDIOT".[/quote] [quote]"well if you say so". Results were very conclusive, they definitely could have cut glass.[/quote] haha oh my god

I swear to god if I don't pass my driving test soon I will go nuts [editline]7th February 2016[/editline] Also is it me or is everyone getting girlfriends

Its not hard bro, just dont worry about getting embarrassed. Thats the trick.

[QUOTE=haloguy234;49688333]Now that my professional relationship with her has boarded a plane, got hijacked by the Taliban, and crashed into the twin towers, I'm wondering how things are going to be come Monday. I actually do want to talk to her about it. I definitely think things did get way too out of hand eventually, but I don't think she would have acted the way she did, moderately drunk or not, if she didn't like me.[/QUOTE] she's not just "interested in you," she was hoping to dig her claws into your back so that she could bring you to her nest and have depraved harpy sex. lucky for you, men are actually allowed to turn down sex, and you shouldn't feel bad for not jumping on something that you hadn't anticipated or weren't prepared for. you can salvage the entire situation pretty easily by showing interest, throwing out some lame excuse for why you bailed, and then asking her out. Don't act like anything is awkward, because that will make it awkward.

I'm pretty sure you could have fucked her right there in the alley like an animal

I'm debating trying okcupid but I'm sorta terrified Idk if I want to date right now but I don't think being a recluse or avoiding it is a solution either. I've had fuckall luck on Tinder/grindr too. There's a local dude who's been hitting HARD on me and he seems nice, but he's also admitted that he is terrible at relationships and loving people and I'm not looking for casual stuff(but I'm not going pure long term either). It gets worse because I just don't find them that physically attractive, and I find myself judging them for having dyed hair. Idk if I'm an asshole or what. I have a hard time with relationships, opening up, and trust as is so bis leaping right to sexual propositions caused me to just run away and hide, mentally. I don't know what to do. Other experiences recently made me realize the wisdom of having an all female friends group. I'd like to find someone I'm personally and physically interested in and make see where it goes, and hopefully they'd not end up exploiting/using me because that fucking sucks and if it happens again I might actually break this time.

[QUOTE=paindoc;49695042]I'm debating trying okcupid but I'm sorta terrified Idk if I want to date right now but I don't think being a recluse or avoiding it is a solution either. I've had fuckall luck on Tinder/grindr too. There's a local dude who's been hitting HARD on me and he seems nice, but he's also admitted that he is terrible at relationships and loving people and I'm not looking for casual stuff(but I'm not going pure long term either). It gets worse because I just don't find them that physically attractive, and I find myself judging them for having dyed hair. Idk if I'm an asshole or what. I have a hard time with relationships, opening up, and trust as is so bis leaping right to sexual propositions caused me to just run away and hide, mentally. I don't know what to do. Other experiences recently made me realize the wisdom of having an all female friends group. I'd like to find someone I'm personally and physically interested in and make see where it goes, and hopefully they'd not end up exploiting/using me because that fucking sucks and if it happens again I might actually break this time.[/QUOTE] Sounds rough man. I've decided to try using Okcupid myself, it ain't so bad so far. Since I'm a white single male looking for female it's basically like a few thousand men fishing in the same pond, so I'm not too sure what to expect (Well, other than nothing). The girls in my college environment don't interest me all that much, and I'm not really the "going to club to find people to date" type. That, and I've had terrible confidence in myself in the past due to my terrible weight problem. Thankfully, I've been able to shed 30 pounds in four months, and I should be back to slim in less than a year, if I keep going. To begin with, my concept of what dating is and what it feels like to be in a relationship is nil - absolute cold zero. Entering the world of dating like that is terrifying for me. I kind of know what to expect and not at the same time. Since I was somehow a single guy who was a good listener, I've heard countless stories of my friends having terrible romantic experiences, and that just adds to the mix. All I know, it might be peer pressure talking, I dunno, but I'd like to at least know what it's like. I don't feel like I particularly need it, nor do I really want it, but it feels like something I should at least try experiencing.

she followed me on soundcloud :smug:

I can go ahead and tell a whole story here, but I think I can get my point across in short. I've met a girl and over the few months she has become a best friend. Today I asked her out and unfortunately there was a no. However our friendship is very strong and I don't think there's a way I could really lose her as a friend. If anyone has had or is in the same position, any ideas what could possibly help me feel better? We're talking it out mostly but eh, yeah that is limited I guess for a while anyway.

Quick Facepunch, I have a building on fire that needs to be salvaged. So, last Saturday to Sunday night I was working security on some carnival party. It was fun except those couple dozen brawls people start over the most stupid shit possible. Anyway, talked with a lot of people there, most of them were drunk as hell. There was this one group though, they were cool, kept me busy in a not bad way. Now to the building on fire: They invited me to another carnival party that just happened a couple of hours ago from when I write this here. I said yeah, why not. So at the train station I call one of the persons of the group, a she to be specific, to ask where they're at. She tells me they're waiting for me at a post office about 200m away from the train station. Okay, I say and start walking there. As I arrive they were nowhere to be seen. So I wait, wait and wait. After an hour I said fuck it and made my way back home and after half an hour I get a text saying they were waiting for me an hour and a half in the diner across the post office and that they're now going home as they can't be arsed waiting for me any longer. I replied with something like "If you tell me you're at the post office and then move over to the diner across the street without telling me wasn't all that helpful." She texts back and says she actually told me that on the phone but I swear to hell and back I didn't hear her say that, all I heard was post office. On that I replied with "Well, can't change that now anymore. Sorry for not listening." Can I salvage this or something? I feel like this is one giant misunderstanding but I have no idea how to salvage this. [editline]9th February 2016[/editline] Forgot to mention that I tried calling her after I arrived at the post office and she did not pick up.

[QUOTE=Jessey;49700102]I can go ahead and tell a whole story here, but I think I can get my point across in short. I've met a girl and over the few months she has become a best friend. Today I asked her out and unfortunately there was a no. However our friendship is very strong and I don't think there's a way I could really lose her as a friend. If anyone has had or is in the same position, any ideas what could possibly help me feel better? We're talking it out mostly but eh, yeah that is limited I guess for a while anyway.[/QUOTE] In my experience, it only ends in two ways. Either she accepts and you guys explore something a little deeper, or she rejects and the friendship goes cold, and potentially awkward depending on your character. It's entirely possible to be friends after the dust settles, but the more you like this girl the harder that will be on you. Anecdote time: same thing happened to me, we expressed mutual interest but couldn't proceed because reasons. Still pined for her anyway because I really liked her but her feelings faded as time went on and we stopped hanging out as much. Stopped talking entirely, I got frustrated because of this (and other life events, admittedly) and went full Nice Guy on her, she cut contact. Cue me being embarassed and ashamed for like 2 years before finally processing the events and moving on. Point of the story is that emotions you feel toward people you're sexually attracted to rarely fade when you're in constant contact with them, despite how much you might rationalize the opposite. I thought I just saw her as a friend, and that I understood things would never work and that things were better that way. Turns out I wasn't being entirely honest with myself at the time and I just really wanted dat sweet ass. With that came a relief of the embarassment and shame I initially felt. If I were in your position, I would respectfully cut contact for a few weeks until I felt like I could be around them without developing feelings all over again. If you're just re-entering a cycle of pining for her and cutting contact to alleviate your feelings again and again, then you're better off just cutting her off entirely. It sucks to do, but it's better than that cycle.

:snip: ill just save it for the dude im paying for this shit :v

I was out with a group of friends on Sunday night, and we were all sitting in a restaurant waiting for our food to come. Valentine's day chat came up, everyone asked everyone if they had a date. A cute girl in the group said she asked two guys out for Valentine's and they rejected her (which I thought was pretty fucking cool, it's always nice seeing a girl be the one to initiate a date). Anyways, it was good to know everyone else was gonna be a single pringle for Valentine's, and not just me (not that I'm fussed).

[QUOTE=loopoo;49704455]I was out with a group of friends on Sunday night, and we were all sitting in a restaurant waiting for our food to come. Valentine's day chat came up, everyone asked everyone if they had a date. A cute girl in the group said she asked two guys out for Valentine's and they rejected her (which I thought was pretty fucking cool, it's always nice seeing a girl be the one to initiate a date). Anyways, it was good to know everyone else was gonna be a single pringle for Valentine's, and not just me (not that I'm fussed).[/QUOTE] If you're not fussed then why is it good to know everyone else is going to be single?

-snip-

Well, so I think I need some sort of heads up: There's this girl in class I'm quite interested in, however, she is somewhat involved with another classmate, yet I do not know if it is just in a casual way (said male classmate was involved with a third classmate some months ago, and the two girls remain friends, so I just don't know where to stand). The thing is, the male classmate will be leaving for another country for a year at the end of the week, while the girl I'm interested in will remain here, and we will even be working at the same place for a month. All in all, I don't want to be an asshole, I'm on good terms with all individuals involved, and I don't want to fuck it up for the hell of it, but, if I have a chance, I wouldn't want to waste it.

[QUOTE=Stormcharger;49704927]If you're not fussed then why is it good to know everyone else is going to be single?[/QUOTE] I'm not fussed about being single on Valentine's, but that doesn't mean it's not nice to know I'm not gonna be the only single person from my group of friends on Valentine's Day?? It's not like I'm heavily invested and the thought of being alone on that particular day is crippling. It ain't. But it's interesting to know it's not an exclusive thing that only I'm going through is what I meant [editline]9th February 2016[/editline] don't read so hard into posts people make, mate.

So I've been practically single for 5 years, and now im practically not cooly

Today was a pretty good day. Got my hair cut by the same cute girl that cut my hair 8 weeks ago. She remembered everything we talked about last time around, and she just seemed really flirty in general. So I thought; what the hell, and sent her a message on facebook when I got home. I told her I didn't feel like waiting another 8 weeks to get a chance to talk to her again, and that I was wondering if she'd like to meet up for a drink sometime in the future. She said that seemed like fun :)

vent/rant time because none of my normal venting buddies are on right now: shit just keeps not working out for me. like things have been much better compared to 2011-2015, but i'm still not getting past that final wall. girls find me attractive now and stuff, mainly because i've been focusing on my looks and being more sociable, but i can't get to having an actual like connection with someone. maybe its just the people who i find myself perusing or whatever, but it just seems like things go alright then they find out what i'm really like and want nothing to do with me. i don't even know if thats really whats happening but thats what it seems like to me.

I met a girl in one of my classes a couple weeks ago and we seemed to hit it off pretty good. I've already asked her out for coffee and she seemed pretty happy that I did, but we haven't actually gone yet because her schedule is pretty much a mess until next week but she has to go get her wisdom teeth out then so that's probably not the best time either. I'm not asking a dumb "does she like me" question because I kind of have a feeling that she might. I'm more wondering if it would be worth trying to be more than friends. She's a Muslim from Afghanistan, although she left when she was 3 and lived in Russia for a few years before her family came to Canada, so she's pretty westernized. She doesn't wear a hijab and doesn't pray 5 times a day so I don't think she's particularly devout herself. Her parents were city Afghans, have university educations and were our age when Afghanistan was communist so I can only assume they're pretty liberal. She said that her mom used to wear short skirts and caked on makeup until the Taliban took over so that would also make me believe her family is also pretty liberal. I'm just worried because it is considered a sin for Muslims to date and it's especially bad for a Muslim girl to date a non-Muslim man. Should I just see where it goes seeing as she comes from a pretty liberal background by the sounds of things or just rule out ever being more than friends because I'm not a Muslim?

Not sure where is the best place to post this but here goes Basically the situation is that I now have the option of going to japan, specifically Akita, for study abroad fall semester. I'm almost done with both semesters of japanese that my school offers so I wouldn't be completely dead in the water. Financially, while I haven't ran the exact numbers yet I'm pretty confident I could afford a good dorm + a meal plan there with some surplus money. It also gets me away from living with my parents for 3 months or so, which is good because I'm starting to hate living with them right now. My parents think I'm socially retarded so they don't like the thought of me going but they can't do anything to stop me so there's that. There's a couple of problems though. I tried listing out the biggest pros and cons, but I'm still unsure. What do you guys think? [B]Pros[/B] -I get to go to japan for 3 months which has always been a place I'm interested in -I would be forced to take a japanese course around my current skill level in difficulty. I know I could continue learning on my own but I seem to have more motivation to do stuff when a grade is on the line -The value of the japanese yen is pretty low right now so I'd have a bigger budget for souvenirs and the like if I went now compared to later -The school teaches in english so I won't be completely torn apart by not knowing enough japanese. I'll try to study a lot during thee summer though. [B]Cons[/B] -Almost none of the courses available are related to my major. I only have 2 gen ed courses left(I'll be a junior by fall semester) and from the looks of it I'd only be able to take 1 of them. If that even transfers. Essentially I'd have to take an extra semester, which is both bad and not bad at the same time(Financial aid covers like 90% of my tuition fees) -Because I'd be behind a semester, I probably would see less of my friends who I've made over the past semester who are really cool. This isn't too much of a con considering we could just hang outside of school sometimes but our schedules are very different -I don't like a whole lot of food so I might be fucked

[QUOTE=RenegadeCop;49706845]Just in time to buy a valentines gift, you lucky bastard, you![/QUOTE] Me and this person met on Valentine's Day 2 years ago, just took till now to get here It feels my whole life is coming around, I'm getting more hours at work and I moved stores to a store where everyone really seems to like me and now this. I don't know it feels very uphill and I hope it continues like that