Super Friendly Social and Love Advice v7 - Bro just do it, She prob likes you - General

[QUOTE=Cinnamonbun;49809097]Welp, I asked her out to coffee for tomorrow, wish me luck fellas first date.[/QUOTE] Anddddddd she ditched me. EDIT: Let me make it clear it was right before we were about to get in my car to go to this local coffee shop. What a shitty feeling, oh well, on to the next.

[QUOTE=RocketRacer;49810100]What a fucking betrayal. Haven't been here in a very long time, but yeah. Here's my generic story: on OkCupid started talking to a girl, after some time we went out last friday, I got us both hot chocolate and we just explored Central London. After that, I thought that it's all great because she seemed to like me. We continue chat, I compliment her here and there, and randomly she aaid that the compliment I gave her "was the best thing anyone ever told her". One would assume that I got this, right? That true happiness isn't too far away now. NOPE, he just told me "I got back with my ex yesterday". You cried for help. But nobody came. :dog: But yeah, yet another backstab that pretty much points to me that I'm not allowed to meet pretty girls, take them out and compliment them on their personality, and sometimes looks. [editline]25th February 2016[/editline] I bet it's nothing special for you guys here and an advice would be "just get over it", but I just had to share this. I just cannot believe this, at all. But hey at least I got in contact with another girl on OkCupid who lives south of London(which might be a problem in a sense that we can't meet that conveniently) and she likes games and stuff. And XCOM2 is a heck of a great game so I can sink myself into that and uni assingments to stop thinking about this shit[/QUOTE] People usually prefer to go safe than risk someone new. She probably felt she could still have a chance to fix shit up with her ex, probably lingering feelings for him, you know.. Trust me even if you were prince charming, if her head's still thinking about him, you would never have a chance of a stable relationship.

A part of my social awkwardness kicked in when my brother wanted to go out to a restaurant for his birthday and when i was looking at a menu on their website, i noticed that a lot of their stuff came with salad, and i suddenly became so awkward that i don't want to ask if they could replace it with something else.

[QUOTE=megafat;49821279]A part of my social awkwardness kicked in when my brother wanted to go out to a restaurant for his birthday and when i was looking at a menu on their website, i noticed that a lot of their stuff came with salad, and i suddenly became so awkward that i don't want to ask if they could replace it with something else.[/QUOTE] half the reason i eat any veg compared to when i was a kid was because i didnt want to say anything or look rude by not eating the veg i got with meals in resturants.

[QUOTE=megafat;49821279]A part of my social awkwardness kicked in when my brother wanted to go out to a restaurant for his birthday and when i was looking at a menu on their website, i noticed that a lot of their stuff came with salad, and i suddenly became so awkward that i don't want to ask if they could replace it with something else.[/QUOTE] you likely won't have been the first to ask. I don't mind me some veg, but I detest salad

[QUOTE=megafat;49821279]A part of my social awkwardness kicked in when my brother wanted to go out to a restaurant for his birthday and when i was looking at a menu on their website, i noticed that a lot of their stuff came with salad, and i suddenly became so awkward that i don't want to ask if they could replace it with something else.[/QUOTE] I didn't eat salad too some time ago. Fruits, berries and such were fine, but I never touched salad. I got tired of the constant "Whoaahooo whaaaaaaat?" I got if I said something like "No salad, thank you." so I just started eating it. Now I love salad. Give salad a chance!

[QUOTE=SgtTupelo;49823632]I didn't eat salad too some time ago. Fruits, berries and such were fine, but I never touched salad. I got tired of the constant "Whoaahooo whaaaaaaat?" I got if I said something like "No salad, thank you." so I just started eating it. Now I love salad. Give salad a chance![/QUOTE] I refuse to eat salad ever since it killed my family and burned down my house.

I practice veganism for purposes of health and religion.

wrong thread?

[QUOTE=AtomicSans;49826781]wrong thread?[/QUOTE] I guess I got so lost in conversation about salad that I just had to add to it.

Well, I just checked "have a truly awful first date" off of my bucket list. - pretty early on she asked who I voted for to make sure it was bernie sanders - we covered the topic of "why it's okay for black people to hate white people but not vice versa" - whenever I mentioned anything, she would look it up in her phone to see if I was wrong. - she spent half the date with her arms crossed against her chest with a scowl across her face - when I jokingly prodded her about it, she unflinchingly asked me if I had a problem with it. - Halfway through, I went to the bathroom and just stared at myself in the mirror to try and rally. We hadn't even ordered dinner yet. - we spent a good five minutes covering how and why she hated men. - We shook hands goodbye while still in the restaurant and left seperately. - the fries sucked. on the plus side, we split the bill dutch. at least she's an egalitarian. we [i]really[/i] hit it off online, too, which is jarring. 91% match on okcupid and a good 4-day long conversation beforehand. I think it might be a warning sign that you have nothing else in common if you start talking about okcupid while on an actual date.

Wow that is...just awful. Better luck next time bud

she also mentioned how she steals from her place of employment whenever she feels like one of her tables didn't tip her enough. I am amazed at how many truly terrible moments she managed to cram into two hours. The whole thing was like watching a documentary on the holocaust. I've had hangovers more enjoyable than this woman.

[QUOTE=Sector 7;49828181]she also mentioned how she steals from her place of employment whenever she feels like one of her tables didn't tip her enough. I am amazed at how many truly terrible moments she managed to cram into two hours. The whole thing was like watching a documentary on the holocaust. I've had hangovers more enjoyable than this woman.[/QUOTE]Wow, before she just seemed insane but from that it seems like she's actually a terrible person. Jesus.

uh, [URL="https://facepunch.com/showthread.php?p=49611787#post49611787"]well its me, oreo guy again[/URL]. A brief update to my situation. TL;DR: just go to last paragraph Shortly after my previous post here for advice, in the once a week meeting that I saw the person i am interested in (I will refer to her as G from now one), I overheard a brief conversation were she mentioned that she has a boyfriend. upon hearing this, I hid my reaction well but I knew I shouldn't intervene. I still kept going to the meetings (and yes, I still brought oreos every time) and the next meeting I overheard her saying that the relationship was never official. I still thought to myself to remain uninvolved. This is where things start becoming blurry and simply unclear for a first timer like me. However, right after that meeting, she and her friends invited me out for some ice cream. we went and all talked. at some point I mentioned that I cook stuff, to which G had us exchange phone numbers so I could contact her next time I made something. A few days later, on friday, I made little pizza rolls. I messaged her about it, and she came over, just to realize that she didnt like meat (not a complete vegetarian, but not a fan of beef or pork). [sp] the rest of my room mates ate the pizza rolls within 15 seconds, I didnt even get to try one[/sp] I had my wii running though, and when she saw, she asked to play, and we played for about 4 hours straight (most of it being just dance). Afterward we were tired and we decided to go out to eat. she took me out to a food court that I havent been to, we got food, sat down at a booth, and ate and talked happily, before we returned to our dorms (we live in the same building, differing rooms though) and said good night, before heading to our own rooms for the night. before that though, I offered to help her go shopping at a grocery store (she didnt know how to get there) in exchange she would take me to another store. I texted her about it recently and she called back and we made plans to go tomorrow morning (I originally wanted to go by bus but she knows someone who drives, so we are doing that). Now, this is what is confusing and worrying to me. We hit it off really well. Not a single awkward moment (i am honestly surprised at my social skills). However, there was no word about whatever former boyfriend she had, if it even was a real relationship, so it worries me. There is another concern to. Yik-Yak is a mobile app, which is basically a anonymous "forum" for geographical areas, mostly college campuses such as the one im on. Its really helpful for knowing whats going on around. This morning on it there was a post, from a girl who stated they had a boyfriend, but recently met another guy that she is developing feelings for. its vague, but the timing seems to match up. [sp]ironically I suggested that person to think carefully, but to stick with their boyfriend with there is no reason to end the relationship[/sp] So what I am asking is what do I do about finding out about her past relationship, if it even was one. And if there was one recently (or even ongoing), how should I handle the situation? I was thinking about just remaining friends (she is a good person, no reason to avoid her) but I can't say that I am experienced

Ok so remember that friend I talked about on my last text? We got wasted and we fucked. Being the guy who had to sober the fuck up to be able to drive her home, now that I'm sober, I'm filled with regret.

[QUOTE=Behemoth_PT;49828879]Ok so remember that friend I talked about on my last text? We got wasted and we fucked. Being the guy who had to sober the fuck up to be able to drive her home, now that I'm sober, I'm filled with regret.[/QUOTE] Why do you regret it? How does she feel about it? If the two of you just got drunk and carried away it isn't the end of the world. Unless there's some context to this that I'm not aware of.

[QUOTE=Sector 7;49812810]start only eating steamed veggies and chicken breasts and get into the habit of exercising buy a pull-up bar so you can work off frustrated late-night energy [/QUOTE] man i have fears of pull-up bars i already broke my last one and now i just go to public parks just to do pullups and chinups. to keep thread related, how do you guys know when a girl loves you? what signs does she show? a good friend of mine who i genuinely liked recently enlisted (conscription n shit) and i feel like i should have confessed to her earlier.

dude people can't love you if they don'tt know you very very closely. Maybe you are asking how to know if a girl is interesed in you? I think it varies from person to person, you can't really generalize and say "she did x, thus she likes you".

[QUOTE=RainbowStalin;49829628]Why do you regret it? How does she feel about it? If the two of you just got drunk and carried away it isn't the end of the world. Unless there's some context to this that I'm not aware of.[/QUOTE] Allow me to elaborate. I like her a lot as a friend. When she's sober. We arranged to meet at a concert yesterday night. I went alone and I met her friends who were pretty cool to be honest. However I had subtly hinted her in previous conversations that I wasn't looking for anything serious, but she left me under the impression that she didn't get the hint. I got there and we started drinking. I settled myself for just beer because I was driving. However she was the one drinking the most. I start noticing she was starting to become more and more touchy with me. I'd try to talk to her friends and she'd cockblock the shit out of me. It made me a little uncomfortable but I didn't really mind it. Later on we moved to other bars to drink, and as her friends started to go home she started hitting on me more and more. Trying to hold my hands under the excuse that we were dancing and shit. Then I realized I had already drunk my share and decided to go home and call it a night. She kisses me and I tell her "hey, I don't want anything serious.". I think I was pretty much thinking with my dick back there because as soon as we got into the car we went like "what the hell, let's do it" and drove off to my place and had sex. I was sober enough to drive, but she was still a bit drunkier and I was afraid of that, so I asked her if she really wanted to do it, but she insisted so, what the hell. Sex was pretty bland to be honest. And as soon as it ended I realized I didn't really feel any kind of sexual attraction for the her. She felt a little awkward too because I think she sensed it. After that, I left her home and went back to sleep. The good thing was that, we talked about it on the phone, and I told her I didn't want more than friendship. I stated it pretty clear that it meant no more sex either. she was worried that we'd never talk anymore, but I don't think that's going to happen just because we had sex once. She said it was ok and we're both ok with what happened. I really want to stay friends with her, but I got a bunch of red flags from her. She's very insecure and emotionally unstable, and the way she hit on me was a bit harassing to be honest. So yeah, my thing is - if a person doesn't make me feel comfortable I'd rather not push it any further.

I think a general piece of advice about drinking is that you should never ever have drunk sex with people you aren't in a relationship with. You can even get charged of rape (if you are a man), or you can just end up regretting it more often than not. Also don't drink and drive.

[QUOTE=da space core;49828620]Long previous post[/QUOTE] ok, update again. before going shopping, I briefly met her in her room and she did say something about her boyfriend not liking something, so I guess that was her hint to me that she was in a relationship (oddly, she seemed to follow my advice I given on yik yak, but i could be overthinking it). we and her friends took us shopping, but her friends left us two alone for the most part. she left her wallet behind, and she needed to buy something. I bought it for her, and so after going shopping, she treated me to lunch, where we also had another friendly chat. we then went to our dorms. at this point, I will go with the assumption that she has a boyfriend. there is a bit of conflicting information, but I want to play it safe. I will keep G as a friend for now. I dont want to be the guy who ruins a relationship of two people. Even if G breaks up with her current boyfriend to be with me, I think a lot of people will still be upset. If her boyfriend treats her fine and they are happy, I don't want to intervene, and I don't want to make G feel conflicted. Of course, if anyone has some better advice, go for it. This is the freest time I got involved in any of this stuff, so im pretty clueless.

[QUOTE=Cosa8888;49830793]I think a general piece of advice about drinking is that you should never ever have drunk sex with people you aren't in a relationship with. You can even get charged of rape (if you are a man), or you can just end up regretting it more often than not. Also don't drink and drive.[/QUOTE] We were not that drunk at that point. We both knew what we were droing. And I only drove after making sure I was sober enough to do so. I stopped drinking at 2 AM, had a cup of coffee after that and only picked up my car way after 4 AM. i can't afford to drink and drive because I'm about to start a new job soon and I need my license and there's police everywhere during the weekends.

[QUOTE=Behemoth_PT;49831109]We were not that drunk at that point. We both knew what we were droing. And I only drove after making sure I was sober enough to do so. I stopped drinking at 2 AM, had a cup of coffee after that and only picked up my car way after 4 AM. i can't afford to drink and drive because I'm about to start a new job soon and I need my license and there's police everywhere during the weekends.[/QUOTE] your BAC stays up even after you've stopped being drunk

BAC effects also vary wildly, one person with a .08% BAC might act and feel completely sober while another person is heavily impaired.

[QUOTE=Behemoth_PT;49831109]We were not that drunk at that point. We both knew what we were droing. And I only drove after making sure I was sober enough to do so. I stopped drinking at 2 AM, had a cup of coffee after that and only picked up my car way after 4 AM. i can't afford to drink and drive because I'm about to start a new job soon and I need my license and there's police everywhere during the weekends.[/QUOTE] 2 hours is not long enough to go between drunken banging and safe driving!

Well I only had one absinthe shot at midnight and 3 beers. I peed like a horse, didn't even felt tipsy at all, and drunk some coffee. I started drinking at 11 PM and the drinks were very spaced from one another. Not saying I didn't have alcohol in my blood to get me a warning but it takes quite a lot more for me to stop feeling sober. I'll be more careful next time, but I had to take the girl home. (I only arrived at my place at 6:30). Oh well, what's done is done. I just can't take it out of my head, because I feel that I was kinda pressured and I only did it out of "meh, why not, what the hell", because I wasn't really that interested in her, and her advances were making me really uncomfortable at some point. I kinda notice that I have this behavior where when someone insists with me, it's like I can't think straight or something and I usually fail at setting my limit clear to the other person. To begin with I really didn't want to kiss her, but she did anyway, and all I could think about was saying "I don't want anything serious". She understood that but still. It wasn't really what I wanted to say, now I know I should have said "no" but back then I was just confused and didn't know what to think of it. She also made a lot of remarks about me that night that I didn't really feel much comfortable about, she kept asking me if I was ok, because for some reason she assumed I wasn't. And then right after I go to my room to get some condoms, she takes out this cheeseburger from out of her purse and starts munching on that shit like a fucking animal. I'm not even joking. And then she was trying to kiss me and the fucking cheeseburger breath started making me sick as fuck. I feel I have always been like this with people, and it may be one of the reasons why I have been attracting so much sociopathic people into my love life, or having people abuse my feelings when romantically engaged (not the case here though). I'm just glad that I was able to pull my shit together this morning and sort that shit out with her. I told her I didn't want to be fuck buddies anymore, just friends and she was ok with it. However I can't stop but feeling awkward and cringe a bit about what happened last night. I feel like it was so wrong for some reason. Or that it shouldn't have happened.

I don't know what to do regarding my dad cheating, gonna give a little update on how things are going Since he left the house, we found out he went to live with his brothers, then he came yesterday while we were out of the house and took with him a machine to do exercise (Because he wants to appear fitter to the woman from US) the TV and sound system he bought some months ago Today he came again while we were inside, my mom was sleeping and I was on the computer, he came to my room first to say hello, I didn't even bothered with him, just saw him and went back to play, then he went to their rooms and began packing clothes and took his diabetic medicines. Told my mom she was the guilty one of him leaving, because she didn't treat him right, (While we have supported his mad rages while he has high sugar for YEARS) and that's why he was leaving, my mom told him, there's your son and he said "Yeah, he didn't even said hi" (I'M SORRY but I wont go running to hug him after that what he did) Told my mom he was going to cut expenses in the house, told her to figure out how she will pay electricity, he was going to cut the internet, and told my mom to decide whether she wanted the credit card with a limit, or she wants monthly cash. I don't know what do do, I want to tell throw my rage at him, but my mom advices me to don't since we don't know if he will get mad with me and cut my education, and since this is my senior year, we have a trip planned to the US, and if he gets mad he may even deny me to go there by not paying the expenses Next week we are going to change the lock of the gate so he doesn't have access to the house anymore

[QUOTE=RzDat;49830059]man i have fears of pull-up bars i already broke my last one and now i just go to public parks just to do pullups and chinups. [/QUOTE] I know someone who had a door frame mounted pull up bar, she was on the up part of the pullup, it broke, she fell to the ground ass first and broke her back, basically pummelling one of her vertebrae. she's in a back brace and is on the mend, she was walking a couple of days after it happened, but that's the fear for me with those things

My autistic traits leaves me completely unable to conform to any relevant social situation. Therefore I am constantly without a sense of identity. It's difficult to engage in conversation because without identity there's really no opinions about anything. I never argue because it's just information getting exchanged.