[QUOTE=Guy Mannly;36136495]or they find the post too stupid to bother arguing against[/QUOTE]
Sometimes it's that. Sometimes it's what Sharker said.
That last furry confession was incredibly dumb and the guy should probably go fuck himself.
The reason you're ridiculed is because your fetish is ridiculous. I'm not saying you should be discriminated or stopped from fulfilling it, I'm saying the concept of wanting to fuck an anthropomorphic wolf or dragon or shark or whatever you want is ridiculous enough to be funny.
[QUOTE=Scarabix;36137220]That last furry confession was incredibly dumb and the guy should probably go fuck himself.[/QUOTE]
I honestly wanted to punch the writer in the face the whole time.
If you're reading this furry confession dude really I'm sorry but that was just pathetic and you should lay off the purple prose. And the insane misanthropy. And probably get some psychological help if you're actually totally unable to connect to people. That's probably a legitimate problem.
But seriously stuff like that is basically the reason furries are ridiculed. Like you could rename that entire post to "Why furries are pathetic" and it would be true. In fact it's practically self-parody it's so bad. It's the typical cocktail of angst, misanthropy, and melodrama that hits all of the major points that people make when they talk about why they hate furries.
THIS POT IS STEWIN ALRIGHT.
woah buddies! got 13 sittin' in there right now, i'll crack out 4 or 5 for this post, the rest will come tomorrow at some point. keep 'em coming if you want to confess anything, and remember if you don't want any response of any sort from me just say so in the e-mail and i'll just post it!
try not to flame each other or call people fags or anything when they post their confessions. it's okay to poke a little fun but remember that some of these confessions are serious and are from users on this forum! don't take this as an opportunity to make them feel bad!
[quote=john doe]Howdy.
Well, I can't remember which thread it was in. But I sent in an email about how me and my cousin were having sex and she cut my penis open with her sharp nails.
Me and my cousin met up for the first time in a couple years a couple months ago. She has a local boyfriend, but me and her have continue to have sex. I found out she was pregnant, and now I'm freaking out because it could possibly be my kid. She was on the pill, so apparently it didn't work. [/quote]woah, cut your penis open with her nails? messed up dude!
ask VNL about it, apparently people in the UK can marry their first cousins. UK and Alabama, idk about other countries.
good luck! hope you're the dad (if that's what you want)!
[quote=john doe]Awhile back I became obsessed with exposing myself and fapping on video on video shuffling sites. Sites like Stickam and Omegle. It's not that I am fat, ugly, socially retarded, or that I don't get my fair share of girls irl, but I guess I am just a bit of an exhibitionist, and the thought of tons of random girls seeing my dick turns me on. I would sometimes sit for a few hours and next through people til I found girls that would either masturbate with me or show tits while I jacked off. The worst was when I would lure girls into trusting me after 30 or so minutes of talking then suddenly jump up and pull my pants down. Sometimes they would join, other times they would leave, but the best is when they would scold me while watching me jack off, then I would cum in front of them. I hated that I was doing this but at the same time i got a little bit addicted. It's been quite a bit of time since I last did, and I hope I don't ever start again, because I know it is a terrible thing to do, and that I would never do that in real life, I guess it didnt feel real because it was on the internet. I just dont want to be that type of person though. Sometimes I'd feel like I was sexually assaulting some of the girls.[/quote]
while i've never done this i see no problem with it. that's one of the things to expect when going on the sites like Chat Roulette and such. i saw an article the other day that warned of kids drinking hand sanitizer and going on Chat Roullette... idk.
fun drinking game: [url]http://www.holytaco.com/chatroulette-bingo-drinking-game/[/url]
probably better versions out there
[quote=john doe]Well I've been extremely stressed all month, finals and all that crap. After a while all the stuff I go through during the day gets to me, ya know? I just need a way to release my stress. My parents and I LOVE Nutella. One day when the stress gets the better of me and I hide one of our last jars in behind some canned chili. Once midnight struck, I sneaked downstairs and removed my hazelnut delight. I open up the jar for the first time, the smell is intoxicating. After getting a good whiff of my tasty treat, I retreat back up to my room. I lay myself flat on an old sheet and placed the jar on my bare chest. I smiled to myself at that moment and nearly burst into teared delight. Here it was, MY jar! It was MINE and only I would be here to enjoy it! I tore off the cap, launching that sucker across the room. It couldn't stop me now, NO ONE COULD! I stuck my tongue deep inside of the jar, it felt like I was french kissing a hottie for the very first time. Maybe the only time. I played with the Nutella in my mouth with all the passion in the world. I maneuvered my tongue in every direction, just trying to get the feel, texture and soul of the stuff. The sounds of my saliva splurting and splushing around in my lovely Nutella lover is all I can hear. It becomes hypnotic. Just having my mouth in the jar is so just not enough. I rendered glob by glob of spread from the jar and began coating my face and neck in Nutella. I feel swallowed, absorbed by the hazelnut goodness. We and the spread were but one. I became light headed as the last of my energy was expended in "experiencing" my Nutella jar. Being the sharp witted person I was, I soon realized I now faced a mortal dilemma. What was I to do with all of this spare Nutella? Quickly I devised my plan and began mixing the contents of the jar with a spoon before patting it down. Nothing looked out of the ordinary. I quickly jotted down my name on the side of the jar and placed it at the back of the cupboard. Hopefully my family would respect my claim, or I would dearly regret this.
The next morning I awoke to the sound of my mother washing dishes. Having had a good nights sleep after having exhausted myself the night before. With this in my mind I proceeded to travel to my kitchen to great my mother. After I entered the room I was in a horrible shock. My Nutella jar was sitting on the counter with its contents emptied. What have you done with my Nutella?! I asked my mother. I used it to make sandwiches for your sisters girl scout troop! my mother responded. I pointed a grimace toward the ground in shame, because of me dozens of innocent little girls would consume the slobber of a freak. [/quote]
first images that come to mind: either [t]http://i.imgur.com/KB1xA.jpg[/t] or [url=http://i.imgur.com/SMfgN.jpg]DEBATABLE NSFW PICTURE[/url]. the first is more valid than the second.
my main question is why didn't you just fuck your nutella jar? seems like a waste to just smear it all over yourself and lick it a little bit. jam your dick in there next time, add a little manmilk to your sister's troupe's lunch!
[quote=john doe]First, I feel like I hate everyone. To me, almost every person I meet is really dull, boring, and petty at the least, and that too many people are "fake". I recognize that this is what most people think, that they are the only thinking, colorful person surrounded by grey cogs, but all those cogs are thinking the same thing. but I can't shake the feeling nevertheless. I hate that I need to put on a fake personality to get along with people, that I need to hold my tongue and restrict my behavior to lead a happy and progressive existence. I have a group of friends, and I feel only revulsion towards every single one of them. I hated every single girlfriend I have ever been with, and I feel like I am putting on an act for them. I sound like an utter misanthrope, but the thought of harming other people repulses me nevertheless, and while I do care for other people, I still hate them with almost every fiber of my being. I only find comfort with my parents, who's personalities are detestable, but over the years they were the only people I could be open with. Every single person I thought I liked ends up "turning" really dull, usually when they get a girlfriend, have sex, realize that "HOLY SHIT I CAN HAVE A SOCIAL LIFE", or something really stupid like that.
I hate people. I hate this world. I hate everything I do. I hate myself.
And most of all, I hate how my mentality is making my life miserable.[/quote]
nihilism isn't the way to be. soon enough you'll find something or someone that you care about and all of this will change.
[quote=john doe]i only want to be a pink panty wearing sissy and someone to force me to suck on a real mans cock, i want big black cock all over me and i want balls on my chin, i shove carrots down my throat and into my tight asshole pretending it is a fucking cock a[/quote]
sure we've all been there once or twice a
I'm not sure what your talking about a.
Sounds like a Canadian a.
I feel like every middle-aged woman I meet wants to bang me.
This is pretty much your chance for facepunch infamy if you write a good one and people find out its you!
Some of these have me in tears. "I wants balls on my chin".
New [url=http://facepunch.com/showthread.php?t=1179499&p=36139485&viewfull=1#post36139485]solid gold only[/url] confession!
-Snip-
Will the solid gold confession ever be made available to us poor blue members? I don't think this'll last long if you keep the best stuff to a closed group...
They're not really that good I wouldn't worry about it guys.
Vent, please post more stories about sixteen-year-old sociopathic furries. Those speak to me on a personal level, because of my own fond memories of being a sixteen-year-old [I]without[/I] any severe psychological or social deficiencies. Reading confessions like that is like looking into a funhouse mirror at the most fucked up carnival in Weirdsville.
I'll post more if i get more!
[quote=jane doe]I cheated on my ex-boyfriend of three years with a close friend of mine (I am female). My friend later confessed to me that he was gay and in a relationship with someone.[/quote]
did you turn your friend gay?
that sucks, sounds like that story someone else posted in another thread.
[quote=john doe]So, I had P.E. for my fourth lesson. So I walk down to the P.E. area to find that just "my class" were to go to the main hall. I find out that our P.E. teacher is helping with the school show. (Every other class is doing P.E. as normal)
So, we go up there, and guess what the school show is? The little shop of horrors. Oh, and one of my BEST FRIENDS is in it. And it turns out that he is the fucking plant. He sings and plays in the costume of the plant. He also knows I'm a bloody voraphile (Sexually aroused by one living creature eating another living creature), and the rehearsal was at the "Feed me Seymour" song. ;_;
I'm aware this isn't a usual confessional but I still wanted it to share it anonymously with Facepunch
(Also, you may of already of received this confession, I wasn't too sure if it sent properly. So I'm just resending just in case.)[/quote]
so you probably LOVED that news article about the dude eating the other dude's face, that makes for perfect masturbation material for you. that and you probably watch National Geographic all the time to see lions eating zebras and shit.
why is it your friend's fault for auditioning and getting cast as the plant? really doesn't seem like his fault at all.
[quote=john doe]Little update from the guy who said his mother and aunt were murdered by his uncle: My brother is now in jail! For selling bath salts! I'm proud.
And as a side question; but I'm trying to be a writer yet despite people constantly telling me I'm fine I undermine myself. Is this normal at all? It's bad to the point I constantly scrap things when I'm over 30,000 words in.
Sorry this isn't more incest or dog-rape but it's the best I got.[/quote]
Plenty of people think less of themselves than they are worth. You shouldn't scrap a story, just put it down for a little while (few days, or weeks) before returning to it. If people say you have potential, ask them if they're fooling you, if they're not then you probably have potential.
[quote=john doe]I have had a girlfriend for about 3 weeks now, and it is the first girlfriend I have ever had (I am 19). But I always see guys on here Facebook complimenting her, so I get really fucking pissed off. One day when she came over with her laptop I decided it would be best if I put a keylogger on it to see what she is saying in chat to the guys that compliment her. I still don't regret this. Anyways when she came back over with her laptop I couldn't get access to what she was typing without her noticing, so I got her a cup of beer with milk added to it, I thought it was a good idea because she was lactose intolerant so she would have to take a shit lol. Anyways, she didn't end up taking a shit, but she had to take a phone call from her dad who was in the hospital (thank god). The only thing I found that she said was a few passwords (which I will use if she breaks up with me, because I feel like the bitch doesn't like me that much) and a suicide hotline google search or some shit. I don't know if I should confront her about it or not. Anyways that is my confession[/quote]
whatever you do, don't murder her after she breaks up with you. key loggers and shit are really shitty things to use, especially on people you think you care about.
you're thankful her dad is in the hospital? and now you've stolen her passwords? you're a dick
[quote=Vasya Pupkin]You can skip the first 2 paragraphs, but it'll help the story make more sense.
Aight, so here's the deal. Last year I finally got my first and as of yet my only girlfriend. (let's call her Judith) She didn't have a lot of friends back then because she used to be a total bitch. She later explained to me that she put up this attitude to be left alone, considering she was bullied a lot. Her mother is Russian and her dad Australian (though he left them when she was 6 or so), and now she's living here in Western-Europe. She's also lived in France for a couple of years, but no anymore. By now she's pretty fluent in my language (and French, Russian & English), but that wasn't always the case. Apart from that, she's very poor, hence the bullying.
Fortunately for her, she managed to get her life sorted out a little after she met me. It was a hard period for both of us. She used to smoke and drink (no drugs, thank God) but we pulled through, and now we're inseparable. So this was a little backstory, now on to the real deal.
I've been a scout for 12 years now, and I managed to convince Judith to join my scouting group. All fine and dandy, but this year we decided to have our camp take place in a foreign country (Croatia, if you insist on knowing). In order to be able to pay for that, every member of our group needed to pay 300 euros. For most, this wasn't an issue, but it was for Judith. She could barely pay her 30EU 'subscription' fee for my scouting group, let alone cough up that amount tenfold. We offered to work in our spare time so she could come with us anyway, but she's too proud (or stubborn) to take the offer and said she'd manage. Now, Judith is pretty crafty aswell, so she managed to scrape together about 100 by making stuff (clothes, pillows, ...) and selling it. But just a few days ago she got the last 200 euros in an act that broke my heart.
Judith lives in a sloppy apartment block. She doesn't want me to go even near it because she's so ashamed of it. Whatever, I can live with that. Now in the same block as hers, there's this Slavic guy, Arsen (which I'll admit is a funny name if you're into toilet humour). Now this guy is your stereotypical dirty Eastern-European dickwad. He's fat, greasy, hairy & probably smelly too. Bonus: he's been trying to get into Judith's pants since forever, but she always gave him the finger. Now, I'm pretty sure most of you can already guess what's coming up next.
Sergei heard about our foreign camp because he dropped by on a carwash we had, in order to raise some funds (although he was obviously there just to tease Judith). Although nobody even mentioned Judith and her lack of funds, the fucker made the connection.
Now, the situation is like this. In less than two weeks, our exams start, and in less than a month, we'll literally be on Croatian soil. During the exams, Judith, and none of us really, have any time to make any money, and in an act of desperation, she agreed to sleep with Arsen (I'm almost literally typing this with my fists clenched tighter than a nun's vagina) in order to get the last 200 euros needed for her voyage.
Fortunately, she's an extremely honest person (a little too honest for her own good), and just the day after she stood at my door. To my great dismay, she also smelled of booze and cigarettes. After all those months of trying to stop, she completely trashed herself again. In a drunk and confused plea, she explained the situation to me, and although I could cry like there was no tomorrow at that time, I just put her in my bed so she could sleep a bit (she had completely lost it. A cocktail of drunkenness, shame, confusion and despair doesn't make for a coherent person).
Now, we've talked about it when she was sober, and while I told her that, while I don't approve of it, I completely understand why she did what she did. We're stabilizing our relationship step by step, and things are looking pretty good. I can't, however, shake off the shitty feeling I still have. I feel like I've failed at being a good person who was there in times of need (although you wouldn't believe what we've been through together so far). I also want to beat the living shit out of that Slav motherfucker for taking advantage of a girl so vulnerable. I really do.
Thanks for reading, you've been great.[/quote]
idgi, did your gf sleep with someone for cash? i thought you said she was crafty.
[QUOTE=ventilated;36147347]you're thankful her dad is in the hospital? and now you've stolen her passwords? you're a dick[/QUOTE]
I think he was saying he's thankful she got a call, not that her dad was in the hospital.
either way he's a dick. trust is important, and she obviously won't trust him for installing a keylogger and knowing passwords and shit!
[quote=john doe]I have had a girlfriend for about 3 weeks now, and it is the first girlfriend I have ever had (I am 19). But [b]I always see guys on here Facebook complimenting her, so I get really fucking pissed off.[/b] One day when she came over with her laptop [b]I decided it would be best if I put a keylogger on it to see what she is saying in chat to the guys that compliment her.[/b] I still don't regret this. Anyways when she came back over with her laptop I couldn't get access to what she was typing without her noticing, so [b]I got her a cup of beer with milk added to it, I thought it was a good idea because she was lactose intolerant so she would have to take a shit lol.[/b] Anyways, she didn't end up taking a shit, but she had to take a phone call from her dad who was in the hospital (thank god). The only thing I found that she said was a few passwords (which I will use if she breaks up with me, because I feel like the bitch doesn't like me that much) and a suicide hotline google search or some shit. I don't know if I should confront her about it or not. Anyways that is my confession[/quote]
Good to see you have a relationship built on trust and mutual respect.
3 weeks and you're desperate enough to install keyloggers on her computer?? jeez. i think the worst part is that you don't seem to think this is bad. especially if you're doing this because "guys compliment her on facebook"
Wow, confessions suck now.
so submit better ones
You guys seem to have missed the fact he tried to slip a lactose intolerant person some milk. This guy is messed up.
intolerant, not allergic
This person is in love with himself. The girlfriend is seen only as another person who will be of use to him (or not).
[quote]So, I had P.E. for my fourth lesson. So I walk down to the P.E. area to find that just "my class" were to go to the main hall. I find out that our P.E. teacher is helping with the school show. (Every other class is doing P.E. as normal)
So, we go up there, and guess what the school show is? The little shop of horrors. Oh, and one of my BEST FRIENDS is in it. And it turns out that he is the fucking plant. He sings and plays in the costume of the plant. He also knows I'm a bloody voraphile (Sexually aroused by one living creature eating another living creature), and the rehearsal was at the "Feed me Seymour" song. ;_;
I'm aware this isn't a usual confessional but I still wanted it to share it anonymously with Facepunch
(Also, you may of already of received this confession, I wasn't too sure if it sent properly. So I'm just resending just in case.)[/quote]
So, if I'm to understand this correctly, you walked into the drama hall in your little gym shorts and had to struggle not to pop wood at the sight of your best friend in a big felt plant costume?
So is the story of Jonah and the whale like biblical smut to you?
[editline]31st May 2012[/editline]
[quote]I have had a girlfriend for about 3 weeks now, and it is the first girlfriend I have ever had (I am 19). But I always see guys on here Facebook complimenting her, so I get really fucking pissed off. One day when she came over with her laptop I decided it would be best if I put a keylogger on it to see what she is saying in chat to the guys that compliment her. I still don't regret this. Anyways when she came back over with her laptop I couldn't get access to what she was typing without her noticing, so I got her a cup of beer with milk added to it, I thought it was a good idea because she was lactose intolerant so she would have to take a shit lol. Anyways, she didn't end up taking a shit, but she had to take a phone call from her dad who was in the hospital (thank god). The only thing I found that she said was a few passwords (which I will use if she breaks up with me, because I feel like the bitch doesn't like me that much) and a suicide hotline google search or some shit. I don't know if I should confront her about it or not. Anyways that is my confession[/quote]
Gee, that'll be a cute story to tell the kids.
um
so how messed up are u in the head john doe
[quote=john doe]When I was younger, maybe 14 or 15, I raped my twin sister. (Fraternal of course).
So... right. I'm 19 now, so is she. I'll call her "Jen" for privacy's sake. When it happened, we were around 14 or 15. Pretty sure it was 14. I had started masturbating when I was 13, after I had found one of my dad's porn movies (No I don't remember what it was called) and watched it. I was very curious about what it felt to actually do what the people in the videos were doing, and I knew that my hand was not the same no matter how I held it. I knew my sister was sexually active (though at the time all I knew is she played with herself too) because I remember seeing her play with herself under the covers in our room when she thought I was asleep (we shared a bedroom until we were like 16, at first because it was easier on the parents, and later just because we wanted to. This story sort of plays a role in that). I usually slept on my side, so it didn't make her suspicious that I was facing her. I'd keep my eyes open a crack and just watch her hand moving under the covers and listen to the noises she made. It aroused me a LOT. Sometimes I played with myself at the same time she did, and a few times I even managed to finish at the same time as her.
One night, I got tired of just watching, so when she started and her eyes were closed, I got up and snuck over, moved the covers off, and took her hand away, which startled her. I told her to be quiet as I climbed on top of her and proceeded to rape her. Though... I don't know how much it actually counts as rape because she never really protested. It felt amazing, I guess to both of us, because she came too. And it sort of just became our thing... We started having sex with each other practically every night. We tried a lot of different things we saw in porn, though nothing really fucked up like scat or watersports or anything. Just different positions. Our parents moved us out of the same room when we were 16 because they thought it was a bit odd we wanted to keep sharing a room even then, but they never found out. To this day, neither of us have had sex with anyone else. We actually live together now (our parents think it's just because it's easier to split an apartment and we've always been 'close') and we still have sex. We've never thought it was wrong, even though everyone says it is. No one else knows.[/quote]
the way this started i thought i was going to have to alert proper channels, then i just got disturbed.
i'm not sure that sex with your siblings is actually legal anywhere in the world (someone look this up).
i worked on a movie about siblings having sex and how it caused their mother to commit suicide, so you two should think about what you're doing and stop it before grossing people out.
no one will want to marry or sleep with a person that sleeps with their sibling or slept with their sibling. it's just not right. you should just bury that in the far recesses of your minds and never bring it up again ever.
[quote=john doe]When I was a kid me and my female cousin lived together in the same house for about a year and a half to help get her parents back on their feet. We had a small blow up pool outside, and we would always sneak out of our room at night and go skinny dipping. I don't think we were really attracted to each other at the time, but we were always interested in each others "parts". Well one night when we got out of the pool and we were climbing through our window to get back to the room I for some insane fucking reason slapped her ass. I saw kids at my school doing it to each other as a joke so I did it to her, so I believe that is the reason why. Anyways she screamed and I guess one of her parents heard, so our first reaction was to hide. We both got into one bed, god knows why, and pretended like we were asleep. When they came in they unrolled the covers only to see us both naked and soaking wet in the same bed. I guess they thought we were having sex, even though I think it would of been physically impossible at our age. After that their family moved out and I very rarely get to see my cousin. Only on holidays.[/quote]
lmbo
[quote=john doe]Hello there, i'm not sure what this is, but all i know is that the message that was sent this you was not by me, i think someone used my email without knowing, perhaps thinking they were logged into theirs. All I can say is that was a odd thing to see in my sent mail. I'm guessing it was someone who lives with me, However I just pretend i never saw that email.
Sorry for the trouble. [/quote]
when will people learn that i really don't care? either i've posted the other e-mail already, or i'm going to and the only person who will know is that person.
also the old "i guess it was someone who lives with me" is the worst excuse in the book.
[quote=john doe]I feel so lost, like nothing matters. Everything feels so fake, time seems to just be passing. It get's horribly depressing sometimes. I try to occupy myself with hobbies, and I have friends and stuff, but it all just seems so insignificant-- I am a worthless person. I'm not saying that all self-pitylike, I mean it objectively. I don't contribute to anything. My life just seems like any other, something that has been lived a million times. I have a really good life, and I am incredibly lucky. But I just spend all of my time feeling sorry for myself, even though I really don't have anything to be sad about. I shouldn't take everything for granted like this, but I just find myself not caring. And now I am wasting my time typing this, being an overemotional teenager. How would I fix this? I know it is going to get better, but it just feels like I am waiting. But what am I waiting for? (Damn. Some profound stuff here.)
Thank you[/quote]
just let yourself grow, it'll all work out.
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