[QUOTE=latin_geek;39313435]I tried fingering and it felt terrible, then I went with a smooth hairbrush handle (:v:) and it was a glorious experience that now has me wishing for a real cock or a proper dildo
so I guess anything smooth and cock-sized, be sure to check for sharp seams if it's made of plastic[/QUOTE]
I've always found the best way to remove plastic seams is to rub it quickly against a smooth blanket / pillowcase. The friction buffs it down perfectly :v:
[QUOTE=Uzbekistan;39312921][video=youtube;VWgwJfbeCeU]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VWgwJfbeCeU[/video]
(I would post here more often, but I have no idea what to say)[/QUOTE]
hand me some bonbonbonbons
[QUOTE=Gravity Ponds;39313421]I cant help but think you would be too shy to speak if he came to your house right now.
Fen, some fingers?[/QUOTE]
nooo I don't want to be up someone's butt :|
[editline]22nd January 2013[/editline]
Oh no wait, I do
[QUOTE=Fingers!!!;39313876]nooo I don't want to be up someone's butt :|
[editline]22nd January 2013[/editline]
Oh no wait, I do[/QUOTE]
out of curiosity I checked your event log to see if you had changed your name just for that joke (sleep deprivation-fueled reasoning) and noticed those nudes you posted 28 months ago are still up on imageshack
quite amazing considering imageshack is shit
ahhahahaha
Mum got prescribed some sleep medication because over the counter shit wasnt helping enough
Shes like
"these fucking things put me in a coma. I showed up for work 6 hours late because I slept past lunch"
She's on flexy time so it doesnt matter in particular when she's in the office.. just as long as she gets x amount of hours done in a fortnight
I just had to wait for an hour in the cold for a bus.
Damn snow fucking up our roads.
So my mom decided that I should give school a try even if I'm feeling like shit.
Yesterday, her judgement about that was... not that good.
10 minutes in to class, I felt like I had to leave, straight away. I go to my dad (the office he works at is not far away from school), he takes me home and I go to bed.
30 minutes later I'm sitting up and puking in to the trashcan.
And now I feel fine.
What the hell.
You had something shit in your system and your body purged it. You feeling fine should be expected.
[QUOTE=Uzbekistan;39313474]Am I the only one here who doesn't massively enjoy sticking things up their butt?[/QUOTE]
Nope, although I suspect it's because I'm missing anything even resembling a prostate by miles.
I'm not really into these games as of late but this made me giddy.
[media]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MVbeoSPqRs4[/media]
[QUOTE=GhostProject;39314602]You had something shit in your system and your body purged it. You feeling fine should be expected.[/QUOTE]
Except when you have the gastric flu and your body purges itself of its insides
But that means you are doing the gastric flu correctly!
[QUOTE=Uzbekistan;39312921][video=youtube;VWgwJfbeCeU]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VWgwJfbeCeU[/video]
(I would post here more often, but I have no idea what to say)[/QUOTE]
[video=youtube;LcmXCXqI7Ew]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LcmXCXqI7Ew[/video]
[QUOTE=Contron;39316156][video=youtube;LcmXCXqI7Ew]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LcmXCXqI7Ew[/video][/QUOTE]
i lost it at the end
[QUOTE=Shotacon;39309281][I]"Haha, yeah. Laughing at depressed people sure is 'lulzy', huh guys? I sure want to violently assault another human because they're currently in the low point in their life. Look how successful I am. I got a grin on my face and all the ass in the world. Sad people and their 'tear ducts' disgust me."[/I][/QUOTE]
oh my god this fucking post
holy shit
honestly are you fucking joking
i can't tell
all you do is whine and cry that has nothing to do with fucking depression
i've been diagnosed with Major Depressive Disorder for about a year now and according to those who diagnosed me i've been dealing with it going on 2 years
do you see me fucking going around being all 'omg guyz my life is shit ;-; feel bad for me'
no you don't, that's not what being depressed is fucking about
i'm seriously really fucking mad right now
i can't even put this into any more words
just fucking stop with this shit
god i hate being like this but you just pushed me over the edge i really hope you're joking
[QUOTE=GhostProject;39316100]But that means you are doing the gastric flu correctly![/QUOTE]
No Gastric flu is not your body going "Oh, a virus thingie, better purge the system from every orifice of your body" it's your body going "OH CHRIST WE LOST COMMUNICATION TO THE GASTRIC SYSTEM" and your gastric system is going rogue and all like "REPLACE HIS ARSE WITH HIS DICK! WE'RE NOT A APRT OF YOUR SYSTEM FUCK DA POLICE" so you piss liquid from it and when you run out of shit and virus to piss and puke you just vomit and shit every possible liquid from your body and then you run out of that and in the end all you shit and puke is your pure life essence that is rapidly escaping your body as you sleep on the toilet floor, tormented by stomach cramps and violent, painful vomiting.
fun times
[img]http://puu.sh/1R7YJ[/img]
I feel not stupid for once. I had a 2.44 GPA in high school and passed one class my first semester in college.
[QUOTE=H4ngman;39316315]
fun times[/QUOTE]
Ah yes, something like that sweeped around a few years ago
Father was out for a week on a training course, we pretty much told him "Don't fucking come home until it's clear"
We slept on a mattress in the living room, because it was 3 steps away from the toilet
Daily schedule was: Wake up, empty body, attempt to eat / drink, sleep more
mensa is a circlejerk
[QUOTE=Sparkwire;39316375]mensa is a circlejerk[/QUOTE]
I know, but I'd trust their estimate over FREE-IQ-TEST-ONLINE.COM and whatever.
[QUOTE=Agent766;39316361][img]http://puu.sh/1R7YJ[/img]
I feel not stupid for once. I had a 2.44 GPA in high school and passed one class my first semester in college.[/QUOTE]
My friend got invited to Mensa, apparently it's just a bunch of Self absorbed "Holier than thou" sperglords
[QUOTE=Agent766;39316361][img]http://puu.sh/1R7YJ[/img]
I feel not stupid for once. I had a 2.44 GPA in high school and passed one class my first semester in college.[/QUOTE]
wait what, 86th percentile
i didnt realize mensa was so plebeian
[QUOTE=kaze4159;39316427]My friend got invited to Mensa, apparently it's just a bunch of Self absorbed "Holier than thou" sperglords[/QUOTE]
well considering they are an organization founded on good old-fashioned eugenics that's not a surprise
I can't even
[media]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0dD3dz44Xf8[/media]
God damnit. With my father on a diet, I'm forced to eat that weight watchers recipe crap all the time. It's like I'm eating nothing at all, just filling my stomach. Damnit, I'm already scraping underweight, I need energy for my workout and to get through the fucking day without being all tired and weak and shit.
[QUOTE=H4ngman;39316315]No Gastric flu is not your body going "Oh, a virus thingie, better purge the system from every orifice of your body" it's your body going "OH CHRIST WE LOST COMMUNICATION TO THE GASTRIC SYSTEM" and your gastric system is going rogue and all like "REPLACE HIS ARSE WITH HIS DICK! WE'RE NOT A APRT OF YOUR SYSTEM FUCK DA POLICE" so you piss liquid from it and when you run out of shit and virus to piss and puke you just vomit and shit every possible liquid from your body and then you run out of that and in the end all you shit and puke is your pure life essence that is rapidly escaping your body as you sleep on the toilet floor, tormented by stomach cramps and violent, painful vomiting.
fun times[/QUOTE]
sounds like when i had swine flu.
that was not fun
[QUOTE=Slowbro;39316245]
[/QUOTE]
Goddamn I love Peter Serafinowicz
[video=youtube;h7xWLOwRVEA]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=h7xWLOwRVEA[/video]
the rap part of the karaoke bar was my old avatar
it was actually pretty great and I think I will use it again
[QUOTE=H4ngman;39316581]God damnit. With my father on a diet, I'm forced to eat that weight watchers recipe crap all the time. It's like I'm eating nothing at all, just filling my stomach. Damnit, I'm already scraping underweight, I need energy for my workout and to get through the fucking day without being all tired and weak and shit.[/QUOTE]
tell him weight watchers doesn't work well because it's not the kind of food that will help you lose weight it's just tiny portions then take away his bread and sugar, replace with meat and fruits and vegetables only
[QUOTE=H4ngman;39316581]God damnit. With my father on a diet, I'm forced to eat that weight watchers recipe crap all the time. It's like I'm eating nothing at all, just filling my stomach. Damnit, I'm already scraping underweight, I need energy for my workout and to get through the fucking day without being all tired and weak and shit.[/QUOTE]
Then cook for yourself. It's not hard.
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