• My Little Fucked Up Childhood
    111 replies, posted
[QUOTE=IamTehKings;21911190]Well next time don't bring fake weed to school[/QUOTE] Yeah, bring the real stuff
Stop being a dumbass and things will get better.
Another quality shit thread by The Big Bomb, made of the best shit on the world
How old is The Big Bomb?
[QUOTE=The Big Bomb;21910770]It isn't THAT fucked up, but it's a story, here I go; When I was in fifth grade (I was about 10 or 11) I brought in a lighter, fake marijuana, and I showed some kids. They thought it was cool, "Dude thats real weed??!". The next day I get a call up to the office. "Louie, you're being dismissed". My mom is there (looking normal) and we walk to the car. She screams as loud as she can. She found out. Someone FUCKING ratted. They thought it was REAL weed. The next day after that, I went to a meeting with my mother, an officer, and the principal. They discussed blabla, and I overheard them talking about the social services. The next day, they came to my house, questioning everyone. The next day in school, they called me up to the office again. The cop was there. He took me down to the station to find out what a criminal was like. We went to the prison, and that was... interesting. He took me to a class about marijuana and substance abuse. It all fucking sucked. My mom yells and yells at me everyday, how my life is SO fucked up and how I'm such a burden on her. Anyways, oh well. I go home, sit in my bed, and read. And read. And read. PART 2: Same year, same grade, same place. One of my friends, Mitchell's birthday was coming up. I couldn't come to his birthday and I promised this kid a birthday present. I know you can't break promises, so I notified him of a present that I can give him. A firecracker. I give it to him the next day in the forest. He goes home, tells his dad. The cop comes the next day to the school. Takes me to the jail, and I have to spend the day in the jail. My mom is flipping fucking constant lids. She is screaming about how her life is fucked up. Oh well. [b]BONUS!![/b] My Cool Uncle I had this cool Uncle, "Uncle Phil". His real name was P.T. Blaine. He was fucking awesome, if you know what I mean. He's the guy who drove around in a brown van with his window rolled down and the beard, and the driving gloves. I remember his AC being broken, so we always had the windows rolled down. He was the leader of some google group "big breasted and mature women". He was sooo fucking cool to me. One day, after we saw some action movie in theaters, we drove around a little. (Did I mention we'd always go to the liquor store and he'd buy me a Mike's Hard Lemonade?) and we went past a house of a girl who's name was "Candy". Phil said that he shouldn't be doing this, and not to tell anyone. He took an ounce of maryjane and sold it to "Candy." He was awesome. Then one day in late 2008, he was put in the hospital. He was getting tired and tired. On January 1st 2009, he died and he was the closest thing to me for a father. My father always screamed at me all the time. He had fucking anger issues. RIP Phil Anyways, :what:[/QUOTE] Similar story to mine, but not as rough... Part 1: When I was in fith grade (I was about 10 or 11) I brought a lighter, fake crack cocaine, and I showed it to some friends. They thought I was bad ass, "Dude dat shit looks tite" they said. The next day I get a call from the office and they said "Richie, you're a big fat faggot, gtfo". My mom is there (with a smurk on her face) and we walk to the car. She laughs as loud as she can. She thinks I am fail. They knew it was fake crack! The day after that, I went to a meeting with my mother, an officer, and the principal. They discussed how much I like boys and Aerobics, and I overheard them talking about the gay porn stash I have. the next day, i came in my own mouth, and swolled without questioning anything. The next day in school, they called me up to the office again. the cop was there. he took me down to the gay bar and showed me how great the YMCA was too. We went to the shower room and fucked a little bit. Turns out he was my catholic priest. My mother laughs at me every day and how gay it is to be me. Anyways, oh well... I go home, sit in my bed, and read gay porn and do some aerobics.
[QUOTE=Doomish;21925408]His little fucked up childhood consisted of him being disciplined. oh no your life is so terribad you should just kill yourself :|[/QUOTE] Oh no adult figures in my life tried to make me less of an asshole someone sympathize me.
PART 2: same year, same grade, same buttplug. One of my friends birthday was coming up. I couldn't come to the birthday because he was straight and I promised this kid a birthday present. I know you can break promises, so I notified him of the present that I can give him. A vibrator. i give it to him the next day in the forest. He goes home and tells his mom. The cop comes the next day to the school and said "sweet gift". takes me to the jail, and I spent the entire day fucking all the inmates. My mom is watching me fucking. She is screaming "Go git em richie, you big homosexual". So the next day I found out I got the clap and crabs. I was flipping lids off the penicillin jars quicker than you can jerk off a goat.
This happen to me before, but I was like 7 years old and they thought I was doing crack. Took them a year to find out that it was just broken life savors in my backpack.
[QUOTE=Crazy Legs;21910842]This, to be honest. Schools these days are very touchy when it comes to drugs and explosives.[/QUOTE] A firecracker hardly qualifies as "explosives" :rolleyes:
[QUOTE=The Big Bomb;21910832]I was 11 and I didn't think right.[/QUOTE] No, you are 11 and you will never think right.
damn dude your life sucked so hard
HAHAHA, for a second I actually took this kid a little seriously... then I remembered it was the "Dan was boobs" kid, xD :downsbravo:
you need to sort your life out kid [img]http://j-walkblog.com/old/images/law4kids.gif[/img]
[QUOTE=SHOH;21928897]you need to sort your life out kid [img]http://j-walkblog.com/old/images/law4kids.gif[/img][/QUOTE] The mexican kid looks badass.
wow, I can't believe schools are so touchy where you live. Firecrackers and (fake) drugs weren't allowed in my primary school either, but over there they would never involve the police or a doctor.
funny how when a guy makes really dumb thread that becomes popular, he's forever known for that thread. The Big Bomb may as well get a title that says "and dan was boobies"
You should let your good pal Dan to distract people when you fucked up.
This was when Dan was just a wee AA?
I got bullied in primary school so much that I have an irrational fear of children. Other than that my childhood was pretty normal.
It's your own fault.
[QUOTE=SHOH;21928897]you need to sort your life out kid [img]http://j-walkblog.com/old/images/law4kids.gif[/img][/QUOTE] I wonder whose bright idea it was to make that. Moral of the story: Only uneducated ignorant white people succeed.
[IMG]http://dingo.care2.com/pictures/c2c/galleries/albums/48/294145378/Laffs/giveafuckometer.gif[/IMG]
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