Depression, anxiety, suicidalism and similar disorders, issues and troubles V5 - General

I feel really bad right now. I've had some small improvements in my life, but I feel like I'm running out of friends and it's my fault because I pretty much pissed off anyone who knew me. I got to a point where I feel like it just ain't worth try meeting new people because I already know they will get tired of me. I don't know what to do or who to talk to. My therapist is gone and it's gonna take a while before I find a new one. Sometimes I just feel like giving up, but what would that achieve? It won't give me my friends back, it won't make my life better, it won't make me a better person, it won't give me the job I want, it won't let me experiencie the things I want. My father always told me about doing the most out of things. The greatest thing you can do in life is achieving the most with so little. Right now my life is bad, I've got close to no friends, a partir time job, a couple of dogs who love me, a college to go to and a roof over my head. I might not have as much things as my friends have, I might not have as much friends as they do, I might not have as much things as they do, I might not be as good and worthy as they are, I might be mentally ill, lost, sad and confused, but I'm gonna make the most out of the little that I have. I don't know where it will take me or if anyone will ever really notice my progress, but at the least I will live in peace knowing that I never lied to myself

[QUOTE=iggy650;51214346]Not sure what happened the last few pages and I don't care, back on track Do you guys have severe motivational problems when it comes to cleaning and chores? My dorm room is messy as hell and I'm out of clean clothes. I know I need to do it but I just have so much trouble bringing myself to clean for some reason.[/QUOTE] I get that all the time, just quit thinking about it and start into it, it doesn't take too long if you keep on top of it and do a bit daily, it's when you leave it a week or two and there's a huge pile of shit to take care of that it's a pain in the ass.

Hey guys, genuinely not sure what to do here. I got a friend that, while I believe to actually be depressed, is [I]constantly[/I] making "I'll just go kms" jokes and its beyond old at this point.

[QUOTE=S31-Syntax;51217358]Hey guys, genuinely not sure what to do here. I got a friend that, while I believe to actually be depressed, is [I]constantly[/I] making "I'll just go kms" jokes and its beyond old at this point.[/QUOTE] Sometimes comments like that are a way people cope. It's not easy to deal with as a friend and it's definitely worrying if not downright alarming. If you can't handle the jokes, do let him know that you're not comfortable with them. If you're still willing to provide support, specify that too. As a friend, you're not obligated to put up with everything that someone will toss your way as someone suffering from mental illness. If he pitches a fuss about it, then you'd likely be better off distancing yourself.

Is there anything to do to calm down when having a panic attack?

[QUOTE=jp_rsardeto;51217409]Is there anything to do to calm down when having a panic attack?[/QUOTE] Me? Headphones. Noise isolating ([B]not[/B] noise [I]cancellation[/I]) Piano music. Physical isolation, and laying down. If I am to calm down from those, I can't see or hear anybody.

I go outside for a walk during mine. I need to be in fresh air if I'm having an anxiety or panic attack. If I'm inside, it's worse. Getting out in the sun is especially helpful. Taking some steps down the street and back. Listening to some calming music and things like that. There are also phone apps that are helpful to encourage proper deep breathing techniques. I'd do some searching around for that.

[QUOTE=jp_rsardeto;51217409]Is there anything to do to calm down when having a panic attack?[/QUOTE] [url]https://www.calm.com/[/url] Maybe? Never used this for that but I've been on here earlier and it's really relaxing. Controlling my breathing has always been a surefire way to calm myself down. Works so well that I've begun doing it by reflex as soon as anything kicks in and it always works. [editline]17th October 2016[/editline] In other news, I snapped yet again from my sisters music. In my eyes, it's not okay to blare off music when you're sharing walls with another person. So tiring. I'm definitely overreacting since I get pissed as a reaction but can I really be blamed when I have so little energy and I've been bothered by this for years on end? I've tried to find solutions so many times and my mother has said we need to sit down to talk about it but it never happens. Of course I get frustrated. I'm always walking around with this thick mental fog. No matter how much sleep I get and no matter how healthy I am, I'm always tired. No one seems to understand just how much this impacts me. No matter how little it is, it is still incredibly tiring to tolerate when I don't have the excess energy to spend on tolerating it. Can barely be arsed to listen to my own music, play games or watch videos since I don't have the energy for that either. Is it not understandable that I have no tolerance for loud music in the room next door then?

for me it's just sitting in the shower, I can spend an hour or two there pretty often

I'm always fucking pissed at myself for feeling like this 24/7. I legit cannot remember the last time I felt happy anymore, and even if I did, I know it'd feel like such a long time ago anyway. I feel like all I do is upset my friends/people around me with my energy and ultimately accomplish nothing. So I've come to the conclusion that every feeling I have is illogical and irrelevant. If I can't be like everyone else, then I just won't be anything at all.

[QUOTE=S31-Syntax;51217358]Hey guys, genuinely not sure what to do here. I got a friend that, while I believe to actually be depressed, is [I]constantly[/I] making "I'll just go kms" jokes and its beyond old at this point.[/QUOTE] I had a classmate who didn't go overboard with these jokes, but he was silent/cautious enough about it that we didn't catch a thing about it. And then he hung himself. And there was nothing we could do about it. It was the worst of the nights with me shaking as hell, being speechless and listening to other classmates skype conversation as they discussed what happened. I was the one sitting next to him for years and it tore a hole where it shouldn't. All I could think is that I was an idiot not listening enough or not being a very good friend, or being something that he wouldn't trust with such information. I don't want to let fear run over you, but I hope you get around and console him in an appropriate time. If he has serious issues then please do something that he doesn't want to just escape the world as a solution.

Thank you for the advices everyone. I can't go for a walk bc I slept for like 3 hours last night and I walked all over town the whole day in this hot and dry day. I can't bear to walk around again. I'll try to sleep on the kithcen though. It's bigger than my bedroom and more colorful too. I think smaller rooms are a little more claustrophobic

I'm finally learning to deal with being a [url=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=K9GH78goOFw&t=9m52s]freak[/url]

[QUOTE=iggy650;51214346] Do you guys have severe motivational problems when it comes to cleaning and chores? My dorm room is messy as hell and I'm out of clean clothes. I know I need to do it but I just have so much trouble bringing myself to clean for some reason.[/QUOTE] This is me. So bad. My depression makes me lose motivation to do anything in general, and even when I do get started it is hard to keep on track for whatever task I'm doing. Like for the last month I have been feeling particularly meh and now I have an assload worth of cleaning to do. Dishes (I've only been doing them like every 3 days instead of after I cook, ehhhhh), laundry (which has piled up in the clean basket from me not folding them and putting them in the drawers), scrubbing the floors and shower and sinks (which is like a 1 hour thing wtf is wrong with me), organizing, hanging shelves, cleaning the fridge, etc. Today I had a list of things. I was supposed to do some dishes and prune aquarium plants that died from moving and hang the clothes line up to do laundry. The clothesline thing took me like 2 hours because I had to find the energy to walk to the store and then my shitty patio was being hard to drill into (plus my drill bits got lost in the 67th dimension because I'm so disorganized). I also ended up taking like a 3 hour nap right after that from being exhausted from just stress and moving my aquariums from my parents house yesterday. I wasn't able to see my bf when he came home from lunch and lost a ton of time to do this shit and that makes me want to procrastinate more like I'm doing right now. Ugh. For me the lack of motivation makes me tired and then being tired makes me lack motivation. Then once I get off track it makes me feel like an even bigger failure and then I don't want to even move. Fuck.

I find myself coming back to this thread and spending +40 minutes typing up a post before deleting it. I'm not even feeling depressed, just sort of somber. Regardless I think it's therapeutic in a way. I hope that if you're reading this now you're feeling okay.

Got some good news: After getting a tip from a neighbor earlier today, I sent my niece and her friends who stay over here quiet a bit to the area, and somehow, a miracle of the lord himself, our cat found his way home, and almost tore my window screen apart. :cry:

I'll never be happy

[QUOTE=Crpto2007;51220228]I'll never be happy[/QUOTE] It feels that way now but try to work out what is getting in your way. What thoughts, beliefs or conditions are making you unhappy. Then try to figure out how to change them. If you cannot change them then you must try to accept that and accept that things are out of your control for the time being. I found/find myself comparing myself to others a little too much, the times when I'm happiest are the times when I can manage to get out of that mindset.

[QUOTE=Crpto2007;51220228]I'll never be happy[/QUOTE] You can try to reach a tangible goal, which is what I tried when I felt like that. Is there a language you want to learn? Book to read? Some skill or talent to develop? It doesn't even matter if you don't feel like it, just pick one at random and say "I want to be able to do this thing" (whenever it be playing a particular song, to be fluent in one language, etc) Try to make a go at it daily, at your own pace, some small steps here and there - and keep track of your progress too. If you don't feel like you are going anywhere in life and won't be happy, try to make discrete and tangible goals you can directly aim for and can make progress on. If you keep that up, you'll start feeling the confidence to make progress towards other goals. Much like learning a language, you won't realise when you're finished - but you'll know you'll be feeling like everything is starting to come together and the pieces are falling in once you keep going.

[QUOTE=The bird Man;51208128]I need music that helps with depression, such as Giles Corey, and Have A Nice Life. I want more with the same style. [/QUOTE] May i suggest Silver Mt Zion? I always listen to them when i feel at my worst. [video=youtube;hQZfGa5t4e8]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hQZfGa5t4e8[/video]

I might have to buy a house since my landlord doesn't seem like he wants us to renew our lease and buying a house is a lot cheaper in the long run than renting. One house I really like is 875 a month as far as the mortgage is per month, but I have to put down a 49 thousand down payment, which is a few thousand away from what I already have. And I don't know if I can talk a real estate agent down like I can a car salesman as far as the down payment is concerned. So I could buy the house, but I'm a few numbers off from being able to afford the down payment. And even if I do manage to buy the down payment, that's all the money I have.

[QUOTE=The bird Man;51208128]I need music that helps with depression, such as Giles Corey, and Have A Nice Life. I want more with the same style. [video=youtube;sGL5SXrCFXk]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sGL5SXrCFXk[/video][/QUOTE] Look up ambient folk punk, lots of good stuff out there in that category, and if you are looking for just some folk in general: [media]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8StJq2DNmaE[/media]

Hey there everyone! First timing posting in this thread. Just have a simple question, does anyone have a family member who is schizophrenic and lives with them? Might seem odd, but very curious as I am dealing with something similar.

A friend linked me to this page when I was feeling incredibly stressed, so I decided to write that I've been harassed so many times by not one person but three people. I will list them down: The first one was a toxic 4chan brony who seems to harass by saying slander to people like "Kys or kill yourself to those of you who don't know what it means) who made a weapon with c_models for the first time seen in this video: [video=youtube;Sfflhk5GHgU]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Sfflhk5GHgU [/video] The second one is a very negative man (according to my very close friend) who's name ironically means "The black n!gger" (if you want to you can read the conversation my friend Moshiko and "Niggarato El Negro" here it is [url]http://pastebin.com/iiKSrxKx[/url]) He pretty much cyberbullied me and TFE (the frosty engine not to be confused with TFA or the forgotten architect) or phanto especially. He called us "pathetic" he called me a girl even though I'm actually a man [IMG]http://i.imgur.com/Pw5M16M.jpg[/IMG], he lies saying that phanto wants this guy to look bad after he reuploaded it without her permission [IMG]http://image.prntscr.com/image/e7df4988dd6a4c5b971b6bc4a29f1f8b.png[/IMG] which Phanto responding privately: [IMG]http://i.imgur.com/dcaj3Xt.jpg[/IMG] and [IMG]http://i.imgur.com/CJA83Ac.jpg[/IMG] And lastly the third one is this adult as well as a husband (because on his profile he mentioned his wife) streamer who not only harassed me on this official YAW (You always win) workshop mod for black ops 3 [IMG]http://i.imgur.com/JqBCXgb.jpg[/IMG], but he harassed a 19 year old teen [URL="http://steamcommunity.com/profiles/76561198189438183"]http://steamcommunity.com/profiles/76561198189438183[/URL], I mean just look at this video: [video=youtube;S9gZE4KRkJU]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=S9gZE4KRkJU[/video] I mean what is wrong with him?? He also harassed a player on this tf2 trade server according to this guy: [URL="http://steamcommunity.com/id/N4than"]http://steamcommunity.com/id/N4than[/URL] In my personal opinion these people are just absolutely unforgiving, stressing and just hurtful that they really should just grow up and think about what they said. I hope for the best of those who are dealing with harassment, cyberbullying, anxiety and depression.

I got my shit together and applied for a few jobs today, a couple of hours later I got a call about one of them and now I have an interview tomorrow. I hope I get the job but I also hope I don't hate it, it can't be worse than waitering but it's still a restaurant job, cleaning and washing dishes.

[QUOTE=MrJazzy;51227231]-new job-[/QUOTE] I think you might wind up enjoying it. It should let you interact with a few co-workers without having to deal with nasty patrons, and from my experience washing dishes, it's pretty easy to phase out and relax.

Yeah the cleaning dishes part I think will be pretty chill, though boring but that's fine, but it's mostly gonna be cleaning the place as far as I understand and I don't see why that would be too much worse albeit a bit more physically demanding. We'll see, I need a job, I need money, I don't have to love it.

[QUOTE=Deikaeus;51227056]A friend linked me to this page when I was feeling incredibly stressed, so I decided to write that I've been harassed so many times by not one person but three people. I will list them down: - snip - In my personal opinion these people are just absolutely unforgiving, stressing and just hurtful that they really should just grow up and think about what they said. I hope for the best of those who are dealing with harassment, cyberbullying, anxiety and depression.[/QUOTE] This is [I]probably[/I] not the place to call out individual users, as you're really just gonna end up making yourself a further target. If you like doing what you're doing, then it doesn't matter what these people say or do. Keep doing what you enjoy doing and the more you ignore these people, the more likely it is that they'll get bored and move on.

[QUOTE=Pascall;51227783]-snip- If you like doing what you're doing, then it doesn't matter what these people say or do. Keep doing what you enjoy doing and the more you ignore these people, the more likely it is that they'll get bored and move on.[/QUOTE] well thanks for the advice I guess:smile:

[QUOTE=Deikaeus;51227903]well thanks for the advice I guess:smile:[/QUOTE] Lika Pascall said, [B]ignore them[/B]; it's the best strategy to get rid of trolls and bad people. The more and longer you do this, the easier it gets, and you'll get a lot happier because you know you're better than them. Stand up for yourself and be strong, don't put fuel in the fire. Psychological Internet Course #11