Depression, anxiety, suicidalism and similar disorders, issues and troubles V5
4,919 replies, posted
[QUOTE=Deathtrooper2;51610892]Well for the past few days. Had a number of frantic "existential crisis" moments. Being raised Christian and then realizing that there is nothing but Eternal Oblivion after death is a pretty huge shock to your reality. I had a moment like this about a year ago, but nothing as severe as the one im having recently.
So, hopefully i can live until 2030-2070 when they have something to "Cheat" death. Right now the thought of it is absolutely terrifying.[/QUOTE]
Nobody really knows if there is anything after death. On a biological level I agree with you - but for all we know the world is one giant simulation and we may move on to the "next" simulation or "wake up" after dying.
Even if we managed to stop/reverse the aging process we will still be able to die from illness, stroke, murder etc.
And even when the technology is there to prolong our lifespan it will likely be outlawed by the government because of our current population growth. In the last one hundred years alone our population has gone from ~1.5 billion to 7 billion.
Our future is pretty grim right now. Either we start colonizing other planets and/or put in population control on a global scale or we are all going to die from the lack of resources and the wars that follow.
[QUOTE=Deathtrooper2;51610892]Well for the past few days. Had a number of frantic "existential crisis" moments. Being raised Christian and then realizing that there is nothing but Eternal Oblivion after death is a pretty huge shock to your reality. I had a moment like this about a year ago, but nothing as severe as the one im having recently.
So, hopefully i can live until 2030-2070 when they have something to "Cheat" death. Right now the thought of it is absolutely terrifying.[/QUOTE]
I do really understand what you mean. I do not think there's any hope, at least for me, to recover from that shock entirely. The only thing one can do is accept our fate, and embrace it looking forward to the next day.
And yet I still fail to. At least I know there's one thing in this world that will certainly wait for me.
If you believe in nothing after death, then being dead should feel exactly the same as not being born yet. Hopefully that eases your mind a bit.
[QUOTE=elevate;51611199]If you believe in nothing after death, then being dead should feel exactly the same as not being born yet. Hopefully that eases your mind a bit.[/QUOTE]
But neither of those things would put anyone at ease, while it won't really matter once you essentially stop existing, the thoughts of the now are what's important, because they still drive those fears, to stop existing is an extremely scary thought, you as a sentient being don't want to go back to simply not existing.
It'll happen, it's an eventuality that is just a common fact of life, but to be terrified of it's eventual progression is a natural response, however you should never let that fear overwhelm you, you could die at [I]any[/I] time, so don't let it bother you, life is too short to worry over it.
the only thing we can do is make the most of the time that was given to us. so what if our lives are just a blip compared to the eternal oblivion that may await us. we did all that we could with what we had. and that's all that matters.
Thanks for the replies guys, it helps.
Maybe im an optimistic fucker, i have some hope we can "reverse" death. But, one can dream eh?
[QUOTE=Glitch360;51609221]Anyone else feel like they're not meant to have love?[/QUOTE]
Maybe. But I can't let it get to me. I'm 21 and on the same road you are. The guys on my team in the military give me shit every month when they ask if I've found a girl yet. Even though people say that im pretty attractive. But deep down I can tell that they really don't care. they like and respect me for who I am.
I admit there are times when I feel lonely and want to hug someone. but when I have my friends and they communicate to me by saying things like how I'm a good person who is brave, kind and has a big heart, I don't feel lonely or afraid anymore. I feel happy right where i am. when I'm gone, people won't care when they look back and don't see any relationships in my life. If they look back and find reasons to believe that I was a good person who left a positive impact on people and the world, I'll be satisfied forever.
I always wanted my life to be a special adventure. And I feel like I'm on that adventure is when those around me support and admire me for the things that I've done.
I feel like I was completely robbed of my adolescent years. I've been forced into a position where I was a completely independent adult by age 18... which on the surface is great and I feel like an asshole for saying this. But I just never get a break from constantly working for my own survival. I want to just rest and let someone else take charge of my life for just one day but that's just not an option.
You ever feel like you're bored of people you like talking to even though you love talking to them and have been for a decade? I get that feeling every other day. I just feel apathetic for no reason.
[QUOTE=milktree;51612209]Maybe. But I can't let it get to me. I'm 21 and on the same road you are. The guys on my team in the military give me shit every month when they ask if I've found a girl yet. Even though people say that im pretty attractive. But deep down I can tell that they really don't care. they like and respect me for who I am.
I admit there are times when I feel lonely and want to hug someone. but when I have my friends and they communicate to me by saying things like how I'm a good person who is brave, kind and has a big heart, I don't feel lonely or afraid anymore. I feel happy right where i am. when I'm gone, people won't care when they look back and don't see any relationships in my life. If they look back and find reasons to believe that I was a good person who left a positive impact on people and the world, I'll be satisfied forever.
I always wanted my life to be a special adventure. And I feel like I'm on that adventure is when those around me support and admire me for the things that I've done.[/QUOTE]That's a good way of looking at it. I wish I had friends that told me things like that lol, you're lucky; I mean, they're not bad friends, but they don't exactly tell me nice things. And yeah, you can't let it get to you. I let it get to me, and now I'm stuck in a pit and don't want to do anything and I just want to stop feeling like this.
It's hard though, man. All it takes is one small thing to put me in that state of mind. Eventually I get over it and things are back to normal, relatively speaking. It never stops happening though. It's just this constant stupid fucking cycle of pretending everything's okay, then crumbling apart, then slowly getting myself back to a decent state. Same shit over and over and over again
[QUOTE=jonex3;51610859]I'm currently going insane and I was wondering what are this thread's views on therapists?[/QUOTE]
Potentially really helpful, but make sure you like and feel comfortable with your therapist(s). If you can't talk to them then it's not gonna help.
Honestly, in the beginning I really liked therapy, but even though I would still say I'm in some sort of a spiral, therapy just isn't right for me now. It's definitely worth a shot, but you gotta be patient.
Anxious as fuck tonight. I keep thinking about Accutane. I took this shit for 3 years before stopping 7 months ago. I'm afraid that this is the reason of my sudden depression & anxiety.
I'm also afraid that all of this is out of my control and that this will push me to suicide. And of course, since suicide is scary to me i keep thinking about it therefore making it a successful loop.
[QUOTE=Drk;51614507]Anxious as fuck tonight. I keep thinking about Accutane. I took this shit for 3 years before stopping 7 months ago. I'm afraid that this is the reason of my sudden depression & anxiety.
I'm also afraid that all of this is out of my control and that this will push me to suicide. And of course, since suicide is scary to me i keep thinking about it therefore making it a successful loop.[/QUOTE]
Have you tried any distractions at all? Mindfulness, meditation, writing, colouring, calling a helpline etc.?
I'm afraid my social anxiety is affecting my job. I've been working there for 7 months now, but I still feel super uncomfortable around everyone for some reason. I try my best to socialize like a normal person, but I usually make it awkward because I don't know how to partake in small talk.
I feel like a completely different person in public / at work. It's like my mind goes into safe mode and I turn into this dull, awkward loser. I wish I knew how to just relax and be myself.
-snip-
Welp, not even a week of 2017 and I'm already sick of it! Just got news that my Gran's bowel cancer has spread and she's got at least 3 months left to live. These past few months have already been terrible due to anxiety and now this.
Oh and I changed my FP avatar to the St. Patrick's cross, cause she's Northern Irish
After moving I've felt so much more lonely than I usually do. It makes sense, I am all alone in here, but I didn't expect it to feel this bad or even feel bad at all? I have nothing here, my only source of entertainment and human contact is through this PC. but I'm tired of having all of my distractions and friends on a flat screen, I want to get outside this house and do something you know? I wouldn't mind walking around in a forest with a good friend, go camping with friends, just fool around with a football or whatever, I'd love to do all of this, but I can't. I have no one to do this with. I feel like I've missed out on so much fun stuff to do when you're younger. I'm not old yet, but moving out and becoming an independent adult feels way too scary and I feel like whatever I could do when I lived at home as a "youth" is stuff I can't do anymore. soon it's going to be work, then all my free time is gone, and all I'm gonna do is work, lift weights, eat, sleep and repeat.
I'm only 21 and I'm already thinking, "where did all of these years go?". I've been absent from any meaningful social relations since I was 15 and every now and then I'd have some "casual" friends who I've met every now and then. Am I socially functional? Am I capable of creating any meaningful social relations? I don't know. I haven't felt any connection to anyone in a good while so it's starting to feel like no.
Then there's my SO, the only person in my life. I don't even know if I love her. don't think I ever did. I don't mean to diss her, but all she does it sleep, complain about not having money, not having smokes or swedish snus, dreaming out loud about food and just not caring for herself at all by dropping personal hygiene way too often. I want to go out there in the world, I want to wake up early and take a refreshing shower to do stuff, but she'll just complain that she wants to sleep or can't be bothered to do anything if it involves walking at all. She just wants to play games or sit in the backseat of a crowded car with music blasting, or sleep. i don't want this in my life, I want someone who is down to do anything without complaining about it before trying it, someone who is capable of using their legs to walk longer than the distance from a house to a car.
i feel alone and i feel unused. my SO doesn't cover my social needs as much as I'd hope and when she's here, I sit on the computer and she sleeps. She doesn't feel like my "soul mate" as cliche as it sounds and it's almost a burden to have her over. I don't know what to do with my life at this point, I have nothing to fill my time with and I feel so lonely. it's a whole other experience to be alone in this cramped home than at my parents with a huge house and 3 cats
Haven't had a decent night's sleep in a week. Keep getting taken advantage of as a free babysitting service for when my sister wants to go out with friends at night.
I'm tired and don't feel like I'm in a position to assert myself when I'm suffering from insomnia anyway and I'm always up late anyway but throwing a baby into the mix to stress me out and make me stay up even later doesn't really help.
I'm going out today to try to find somewhere where I can treat myself, I might just go back to the mall or something I don't know.
I'm very tired.
You could just try mentioning that you aren't available for a while, and try to get some rest, you can't always help others out without pushing yourself past your limit too. I understand you feel too tired to try, but you should try before you run yourself any more ragged.
I'll probably do that. My second semester of senior year is starting next week too, and I'd rather have some energy left over for that.
I want to invite my boyfriend to go with me today but I feel like I'm in such a bad mood from no sleep and super cranky that I won't be very good company. I don't really feel like talking to anyone. I hope that's not weird.
I might drive down to the big flea market on the other side of town and wander around to see if I can find anything cool.
[QUOTE=PredGD;51627361]After moving I've felt so much more lonely than I usually do. It makes sense, I am all alone in here, but I didn't expect it to feel this bad or even feel bad at all? I have nothing here, my only source of entertainment and human contact is through this PC. but I'm tired of having all of my distractions and friends on a flat screen, I want to get outside this house and do something you know? I wouldn't mind walking around in a forest with a good friend, go camping with friends, just fool around with a football or whatever, I'd love to do all of this, but I can't. I have no one to do this with. I feel like I've missed out on so much fun stuff to do when you're younger. I'm not old yet, but moving out and becoming an independent adult feels way too scary and I feel like whatever I could do when I lived at home as a "youth" is stuff I can't do anymore. soon it's going to be work, then all my free time is gone, and all I'm gonna do is work, lift weights, eat, sleep and repeat.
I'm only 21 and I'm already thinking, "where did all of these years go?". I've been absent from any meaningful social relations since I was 15 and every now and then I'd have some "casual" friends who I've met every now and then. Am I socially functional? Am I capable of creating any meaningful social relations? I don't know. I haven't felt any connection to anyone in a good while so it's starting to feel like no.
Then there's my SO, the only person in my life. I don't even know if I love her. don't think I ever did. I don't mean to diss her, but all she does it sleep, complain about not having money, not having smokes or swedish snus, dreaming out loud about food and just not caring for herself at all by dropping personal hygiene way too often. I want to go out there in the world, I want to wake up early and take a refreshing shower to do stuff, but she'll just complain that she wants to sleep or can't be bothered to do anything if it involves walking at all. She just wants to play games or sit in the backseat of a crowded car with music blasting, or sleep. i don't want this in my life, I want someone who is down to do anything without complaining about it before trying it, someone who is capable of using their legs to walk longer than the distance from a house to a car.
i feel alone and i feel unused. my SO doesn't cover my social needs as much as I'd hope and when she's here, I sit on the computer and she sleeps. She doesn't feel like my "soul mate" as cliche as it sounds and it's almost a burden to have her over. I don't know what to do with my life at this point, I have nothing to fill my time with and I feel so lonely. it's a whole other experience to be alone in this cramped home than at my parents with a huge house and 3 cats[/QUOTE]
I was in your exact position in your age. What improved a lot in my life was saving a big friendly dog. He's my soulmate, and he's the only one who makes me go out and do stuff. Camping, running, some occations meet other people in the park. Yes, there's lots of work taking care of him, but damn I love him so much. I felt very lonely and terrified living with my parents, and worse when I moved out. I still do feel terrified but not lonely. At least consider this, because there's a reason having a pet is a good and common therapy method. And don't buy a dog, save one from a shelter. Better connection with the dog, and you do a good deed, and save lots of money.
[QUOTE=The bird Man;51627725]I was in your exact position in your age. What improved a lot in my life was saving a big friendly dog. He's my soulmate, and he's the only one who makes me go out and do stuff. Camping, running, some occations meet other people in the park. Yes, there's lots of work taking care of him, but damn I love him so much. I felt very lonely and terrified living with my parents, and worse when I moved out. I still do feel terrified but not lonely. At least consider this, because there's a reason having a pet is a good and common therapy method. And don't buy a dog, save one from a shelter. Better connection with the dog, and you do a good deed, and save lots of money.[/QUOTE]
This was my big goal of moving out actually, but then somehow I ended up renting a place that disallows animals :( I have a feeling I won't live here for too long with this in mind, having a dog was the one thing I hoped would help me and here I won't have the chance to have one
So my mom is pulling the card that I don't care about being with the family when I'm home from uni, and I've kinda gotten on the suicidal thought route again. Although not far, I just wanna go and fall asleep, and never wake up again.
I gave them tomorrow as full family day so I could go and say goodbye to one of my bestfriends, but now my mom is fucking pissed at me for not being there to dinner and I don't know what the fuck to do...
I'm about calling the quits and tell her if she keeps treating me like that I won't be coming home next Christmas or anytime soon. She can destroy my PC, my Vinyls, I have come to far to fucking care anymore.
I wish I could like her... Understand her and so on. Also still glad I didn't get diagnosed with something, as she half ranted about mental people are crazy and so on...
Ugh...
[editline]6th January 2017[/editline]
That sly fucker, she have turned on the washing machine and left the house, meaning she knows I can't leave because I worry about it...
I need advice real bad. living alone is driving me insane. It's okay during the day when I have some shit to do, like lifting weights, doing dishes, making food and so forth, but then there's that period between dinner and bedttime that fucks me up real good. I don't think I've ever felt so much loneliness crush down on me before, this is beyond anything I've experienced before. thoughts that I'll always be alone, that I won't find anyone to connect with, that my SO will disappear very soon, that a future drug addiction will fuck me up, it circles around in my head. I've never been so desperate to make this feeling go away before. I went ahead and prepared some MDMA for myself because that makes me happy right? I know, it hasn't been 6 weeks since last time which means it might be damaging to my brain but this is a once in a lifetime scenario, I promise you that. One time can't hurt? Fuck me? I didn't have enough so I dropped it and now I'm feeling even worse. What did I just think of doing? I've never used drugs to cope before, what am I thinking? This is the sixth day and I'm already reaching for terrible coping mechanisms, how is this going to evolve?
I don't know what to do guys. I've always been able to just let it sink in without resistance, which is bad but so much more comfortable than this. Now every little cell in my body is screaming at me for how lonely I am and I feel so bad. I'm scared I'll do something stupid, I'm scared I'll be too tempted by drugs to cope, I'm scared of being alone. i'm so scared, please help
[editline]6th January 2017[/editline]
I feel a little better now, it comes and it goes.. it helps to occupy myself by googling for things or reading reddit, but it's only temporary. Looking away from my computer and into my living room is a grim reminder that I'm all alone here. dunno how to deal with this really, I'll run out of distractions and it's back full force
[editline]6th January 2017[/editline]
where do I go when the pain follows me wherever I go? there's no beast or predator to hide from, there's no one who wants to hurt me, there is no danger I can run from. it's all in my head, tainting everything I do and touch. I haven't felt this kind of pain since 2014 where my mental health was at its worst. I thought I had gotten further ahead than that by now. I didn't think I'd sit in my office chair with such a crushing loneliness while visualizing my own suicide in a panicked state of mind where time starts to lose meaning. I thought I was past this, or at least the most painful parts. it is when I experience this that I realize what I've been through in the past is just a stroll in the park compared to what might be ahead. I lived at home, my family was very supportive, I always had a safety net. it felt shit, but I always had them. now I have none of that. they're a phone call away but it's not good enough. if I fall now, I'll go beyond what I considered rock bottom back then. I don't believe there's such thing as rock bottom anymore. it keeps going until you're dead or get back on your feet, death is the bottom.
I learned the hard way that SH probably isn't the best place to talk about bullying and shit that hurts to recall
I fucking hate everything.
Can I just crawl into a hole and disappear for the next year please.
[QUOTE=Systema;51629596]
[url]http://www.wikihow.com/Act-After-a-Car-Accident[/url][/QUOTE]
Oh I know this one. Lie still and don't move your broken back for at least two weeks.
I tried it out in late November last year:
[t]https://puu.sh/sxtt4.jpg[/t]
Was going to drive down 3 hours to see someone I haven't seen in a while, we have had it planned for two weeks and she cancelled it on me tonight (the night before) due to a friend emergency. I get it, I really do but it doesn't stop it from hurting so fucking badly, I even packed to go and spend the night and everything and I don't even want to unpack, its only like two outfits and my toothbrush and toothpaste but when I got through two horrible fucking weeks of shitty situations just to get to the one thing that would put a smile on my face it falls through.
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Depression, anxiety, suicidalism and similar disorders, issues and troubles V5
