Depression, anxiety, suicidalism and similar disorders, issues and troubles V5 - General

[QUOTE=Pascall;51753930]Totally possible. Social stamina isn't a set thing, it's fluid depending on age, health, environment, etc. You may just be at a point in your life where socializing is a lot more desirable than being alone. Nothing wrong with that.[/QUOTE] These past few years have been rough and I think I've grown as a person because of it. Makes sense that I'm more my self around people instead of just spending all my time inside my own head being miserable. I guess things really can get better!

anyone take viibryd? it's been better for my mood than lexapro (pretty good in fact) but it's been giving me insane dreams... they used to just be vivid and sweaty but lately they've evolved into really disorienting stuff + rocky sleep that leaves me feeling foggy and disconnected in the morning. residue from that gave me a good 10 minutes of panicked state today around noon, which hasn't happened to me in quite a while. seeing my medical dude in two days I'll talk to him about it.

[QUOTE=HWECQI;51750961]You are not the first person to go through being bullied in school for things you did early on. I definitely experienced something very similar cuz back in school I was incredibly awkward socially, and I also had a major problem with masturbation addiction, so that kinda lead to like 8 years of being called a fat weirdo faggot who jerked off too much. Most people saw me as an idiot weirdo and often wanted almost nothing to do with me. Here's the thing though, as awful as that is, no one really hates you or wants you to die. They're being gigantic assholes, for sure, but frankly in middle school that's the age when people tend to be the shittiest. And frankly, you can pay attention all you want, but if you already have a heavy bias against yourself as a person, you're gonna find every reason you can to think they hate you, even if that's not really the case. So, you kinda have to talk to people to get a better idea of what they truly believe. But, who cares what they think, honestly? You certainly should not. I know that's a very hard thing to buy, but you wouldn't believe how little a lot of that stuff in middle school matters later on. Your personality being abnormal or different is not enough grounds to assume you have no reason to live, or that no one wants you to live. I'm in college and I'm going to classes with a man in his 80s that's going into the same level of math that I am, and he's having trouble with a lot of simple things that are just straight up normal to me. But neither I or anyone in my class are thinking anything poor of the man, because he's trying. He's trying to learn, so it doesn't mean anything bad about him. I can't tell you what to do with your life sadly, so if you genuinely wanna ignore everything I'm saying here and just off yourself, I can't do much about that. But I really really really really really do not want you to do that, and I'm sure there are plenty of people in your life or on here who feel the same way. Suicide is never an answer for anything and I feel like you completely ignored my whole paragraph about it. I'm telling you from experience, it's incredibly hard to do, and you feel way worse for it rather than any kind of relief. I was fortunate that I failed at it, but that bit of horror when I thought I wasn't gonna make it was the worst thing in the world. Please don't do this to yourself.[/QUOTE] Even if they don't want me to die, any person with eyes and ears can see that those people are disgusted at me and wish that I'm not around. Believe it or not, school life where I live in is so complicated and difficult and I will need to interact with people here sooner or later and need to make friends, which is not working at all. It does matter because no one can live alone at all. I'm afraid that I will make the same mistake again if I go to college, which I probably won't get into. Unrelated, but I've got to vent about this as well. I don't know how the system works anywhere else in the world so this can get a bit confusing with the translation. My father is a graduate of a very high-classed university in my country. My brothers both did not follow in his steps and now he's leaving it up to me to apply for that same university. It is very very hard to get into and thousands of students from all over the country fight to get into that same university. The thing is, I know I'm not going to be able to get in there and I don't want to. I am academically behind and is not a great learner. Either that or he asks me to go to another high classed university and study economics (a subject I did not take in high school not have any interests of, NONE). All I want is to apply at an easier, yet good college and study something else but my father isn't supportive about it. He forces me to go to that university just so one of his children can follow his steps and bring a good name to the family, that's it. Even though he knows of my disabilities he still forces me to do so. But even then I don't think I'll pass the entry to that easier college and would probably be a jobless, uneducated, fat, old loser who does nothing but play video games terribly and jerk off to the same internet porn for years and a soon to be homeless, murderer and rapist. Back to my condition. I do everything incredibly slowly, sure many people are like that, but in my case it just sounds stupid and retarded. I'm still learning basic things and I believe kids younger than me can do so much more than me (basic and specific traits) which I won't be able to do until at least many many years. It's embarrassing when you see kids and they can read, write, play, create stuff better than an old man. You wouldn't know what that 80 year old guy in that college you're in may be thinking. Just because it happens, doesn't mean it's acceptable. Even if I can learn something at 80 years old, it's just impossible and unacceptable. I don't know what miracle motivation can push me to studying one thing for many many years (in that same time generations start learning and finish sooner than I do) and nobody would pay for my education (especially if it's the same thing for many years) and even If I do learn something at 80 years old, I wouldn't get a job or live long enough to use whatever I learned. It's useless, time and money wasting. I'm not ignoring you, I'm just saying even if there is a chance that life can get better or miss out on some opportunities if I don't die, which is unlikely and life would quickly turn against me again and throw shit at me, I wouldn't feel the regret of not doing it because I wouldn't feel anything, at least the pain is gone. Life is going nowhere but downhill despite all I do to hold on and I'm sorry but no one had made me change my mind at all. I have no will to live and I have no one anymore. Honestly, I don't think professional help such as seeing a therapist or doctor would help me. I need is a person who would listen and care for me. I did have that person, who was my only reason for living, but due to my stupidity, I made her very mad at me and it looks like she will never come back and I can't contact her at all. I always say stupid things to people that I care and I always only realize the wrongs when it's too late. I can never find anyone like her again and honestly I don't want to. I don't think anyone can be like her or replace her (not that I want to) but now all is gone and I'm saving the heartache and just staying alone. [QUOTE=darksoul69;51753828]Lots of people have problems in school. You just don't know it because they don't show it in public... this is especially true for college. Everyone learns at their own pace. If you're slower then other people, it's no big deal. And based on how well written your post is I would not call you mentally retarded. You may be challenged in some areas but you are by no means stupid. And you think your pace is slow?? In seventh grade I couldn't do basic multiplication. Period. Every time I tried learning in class I couldn't focus on the subject or comprehend the process involved in how the equation was done. And I was too nervous to ask the teacher for help. [/QUOTE] If you knew me in real life, you would say that I'm retarded in one way or another. Many of my teachers and friends share the same opinion. I've hold myself back from being retarded and doing stupid things but even that people still laugh at me or be disgusted and with that I sacrificed any personality and I'm just a quiet nobody. No, I could not do basic math at middle school either and pay attention at class. Even now when I get my private tutor I still have problems paying attention even when he's right next to me talking directly at my ears. I'm still behind on so many things now which I should not be behind in. My teacher would always call me and my parents to talk about my bad grades and stupid mentality.

i really regret ever drinking so much now im stuck with hallucinations that wont go away probably for the rest of my life

[QUOTE=Crpto2007;51755154]i really regret ever drinking so much now im stuck with hallucinations that wont go away probably for the rest of my life[/QUOTE] At least are they good hallucinations?

[QUOTE=SweetShark;51755251]At least are they good hallucinations?[/QUOTE] I have a deadbeat uncle who threw away a promising career as a lawyer by turning to the bottle and becoming abusive as a result. He drank so hard that one day when he decided to go cold turkey, it didnt take long before he ended up nearly dying due to delirium tremens and the accumulated damage from decades of alcoholism. The doctors, and myself, both told him that turning to the bottle again would kill him dead. That put the fear of god into him and he stayed clean since.

Don't kill yourself. It's not worth it at all, Just wait till you meet something after they break up with you so you can say, and I thought about suicide, but bitch you aren't worth it something like that, the moral of the story is suicide is not the answer, inner peace and understanding of how valuable your life is, and that you can say how bad it is and all, it can get a lot worse than you really think it is now.

[QUOTE=SweetShark;51755251]At least are they good hallucinations?[/QUOTE] It depends sometimes their good and the voices say good things about me or ask me questions like how are you doing. Sometimes their bad though and say bad things about me

I've been living alone as a student for about half a year now, and I just feel trapped. I keep in touch with my friends with a group chat, but it mostly comes down to me lurking as they make plans among themselves that I can't partake in because I'm halfway across the country. My classmates here are nice, but they can be hard to talk to and I don't feel like I'm forming any meaningful connections. I don't have a car or a driver's license and the place where I live is far away from the city, so I can only spend most of my time at my computer. I work out regularly but get no results. My drawing skills refuse to improve. I should be making a portfolio in preparation for further education, but I just can't find any motivation to do it. I wouldn't be able to get a girlfriend even if I was physically able to meet one. Dating scares me, there's no doubt that even if I ended up going on one it wouldn't work. I'm just not fun to talk to. I'm completely unable to carry an interesting conversation if it doesn't involve stupid shit like video games or something. I tried Tinder for five minutes before deleting it out of fear of rejection and embarassment. I haven't been in a relationship for five years; I miss the feeling so much and I fear I'm about to grow out of that phase and the window will be gone forever. In addition, I don't really have anyone that I trust enough to talk about these things, not even my family, so I have to resort to venting on online forums. I've gone the route of dumping my personal problems on friends before and it's not a good thing to do.

[QUOTE=GoldAssassin;51754943]If you knew me in real life, you would say that I'm retarded in one way or another. Many of my teachers and friends share the same opinion. I've hold myself back from being retarded and doing stupid things but even that people still laugh at me or be disgusted and with that I sacrificed any personality and I'm just a quiet nobody. No, I could not do basic math at middle school either and pay attention at class. Even now when I get my private tutor I still have problems paying attention even when he's right next to me talking directly at my ears. I'm still behind on so many things now which I should not be behind in. My teacher would always call me and my parents to talk about my bad grades and stupid mentality.[/QUOTE] So? I was the quiet kid at school and it didn't bother me any. People may or may not have thought I was retarded - didn't give a shit. I put myself out there and made some friends by being persistent. Not many - but the ones I did have were worth the effort. There was a time in jr high where I sat at an all girls table during lunch constantly, made friends with some of them and dated a couple of them. A quarter of the table thought I was disgusting, half of them tolerated me and the other quarter liked me. You said above that you had ADHD and other disorders, but then you said that you didn't want to see a psychiatrist. Are you self diagnosing or were you diagnosed by a professional? Are you taking any meds at all? Because untreated ADHD can ruin your life.

Everyone's been really supportive of me and helping out in anyway they can since my diagnosis. I probably would of given up if not for the amount of support I'm getting from my counsellors and social workers. I think I've come a long way since being practically suicidal a few months ago. I'm learning to cope with my mental illness and manage my symptoms better than before. I think I'm getting a lot better.

First time I showered for one and a half month today, only meet one person a month anyway. Now I should try to eat more than 4-6 meals a week.

How can you go a month without showering holy hell :/ I dunno what's wrong with me, I randomly started feeling lonely and sad and s good bit of chest tightness about half an hour ago. Today went fine so I'm not sure what triggered it and if it'll happen again.

Medication won't help you if you can't help yourself, If you don't feel happy as it is pills won't magically make you feel happy. Don't kill yourself, give the universe the satisfaction it deserves by letting something else take your life! Also it seems like a bunch of people venting thinking nobody cares just waiting to hear that someone does, how bad have your lifes really been, a lot of people seem to think they have it so bad, that must end it all, why? I grew up with my father leaving my life at an early age, I grew up with a drug affected abusive mother, abusive childhood, went through 12 years of bullying at school, from pre-primary school to high school, changed schools twice, had online bullying and physical, verbal and social isolation from people at school on purpose, even after school. I didn't self harm, or commit suicide, and I had people telling me I would die a virgin, they were wrong, I had people telling me a bunch of things, they were wrong about a lot of the shit they talked, I had my first girlfriend tell me that she didn't love me, I didn't kill myself over it though, I had a lot of abuse, I've been homeless, and I've been broke, they are not reasons to end my life are they though, I've been depressed, I've been on a heap of medication, ranging from abilify, sodium valporate, epilim, olanzapine, benzotrapine, lithium, xeroquel, and got myself off all of it. None of it helped, I didn't want any of it, and never did, I got myself unprescribed from the medication that over 5 years of mental health got wrong, and got paid to do so, I manage myself, and I lost all the weight olanzapine put on my body, and kept going, a lot of this woe is me bullshit that people spill, not thinking they can ever achieve anything, or even learn how to feed themselves, you have to learn to be independant, not a baby suckling out other human emotions. Don't kill yourself, give the universe the divine satisfaction it deserves.

[QUOTE=kijji;51757713]How can you go a month without showering holy hell :/ I dunno what's wrong with me, I randomly started feeling lonely and sad and s good bit of chest tightness about half an hour ago. Today went fine so I'm not sure what triggered it and if it'll happen again.[/QUOTE] Zero motivation since I see nothing to come out of it except to prevent diseases.

[QUOTE=The bird Man;51757645]First time I showered for one and a half month today, only meet one person a month anyway. Now I should try to eat more than 4-6 meals a week.[/QUOTE] Holy sh*t. This is unhealthy.... take at least one shower after two days. [editline]1st February 2017[/editline] [QUOTE=Crpto2007;51755950]It depends sometimes their good and the voices say good things about me or ask me questions like how are you doing. Sometimes their bad though and say bad things about me[/QUOTE] Are these voices base from old discussions you had with people you care or dislike?

[QUOTE=Crpto2007;51757433]Everyone's been really supportive of me and helping out in anyway they can since my diagnosis. I probably would of given up if not for the amount of support I'm getting from my counsellors and social workers. I think I've come a long way since being practically suicidal a few months ago. I'm learning to cope with my mental illness and manage my symptoms better than before. I think I'm getting a lot better.[/QUOTE] That's really great to hear. Keep up the good work.

This is a general message to everyone who is brave enough to post about themselves and their problems in here. I've got some sort of mood disorder and I know how hard it is to even post about anything when you are going through deep depressions and have a rough life. You probably think to yourself, no one will listen, no one will actually care. Well I care, even with as little as I care about my own life and often times want nothing more than the balls to pull the trigger. I won't tell you that suicide isn't the answer, because honestly for some people I think it is. It's a horrible thing and loss of life is never good, but when you've suffered as some of these people have, not having to go through it anymore is as much heaven as not having problems anymore is. It hurts the people who care for them (although some don't even have that much), but I think people who care more about how their suicide affects them over WHY they committed the act are the truly selfish ones. Suicide isn't a selfish act, it's an escape from a frankly grey and dark life. It might not always be the correct choice, but it is a choice and anyone who downs you for that choice without going through what you have is ignorant and naive, and NO ONE has gone through what you have. I also won't tell you it will get better because I am a realist not an optimist. Sometimes it doesn't get better, and sometimes in reality, people's lives are garbage until the day they draw their last breath. I think some people even get so absorbed in the illusion that it "always gets better" that when it doesn't get better, it shatters their expectations and pushes them in to an even further depression. It's a dangerous thing to tell someone that it always gets better. It got better for you, that isn't the case for everyone else who struggles. Everyone is different and people try to "help" by expecting you to be like they are. The first step to helping anyone is understanding just how different one person is to the next. If you can't even be bothered to do that, you shouldn't be helping anyone. What I will tell you is that this life we've been gifted with is a beautiful thing, even with all of its problems and struggles. Every day I go through a depression (sometimes lasting weeks and months) I always try to keep in mind the beauty of everything. Fuck what people expect of me, fuck what society wants. I focus on the here and now, and what I should be thinking about that makes everything okay, even if only for a moment. We owe nobody but ourselves anything in truth, maybe with exceptions for your family and friends who have done everything they can for you. I haven't gone to college or have even really learned anything that will give me a career and what many would consider a dream life, and I'm completely okay with that. It took a long time to not feel like a piece of shit because I hadn't accomplished anything that most other people would appreciate. Constantly worrying about these societal obligations is one of the biggest things that made my life unbearable and when I finally freed myself of them, I felt liberated. I live with my mother at the age of 22 and I'm completely okay with that. I don't do much but play games and try to stay happy in this small town where I can't work or socialize, and for me right now, that's a fine life. I can't even get help with my mood problems because I have no access to a therapist or psychologist in the area that I live. Every day I can't control how I feel is another day I struggle to accept everything, but I've done everything I can in other areas of my life to make everything comfortable, and it has worked out well enough so far, haven't killed myself yet. [b]The base of what I'm saying is[/b], do whatever you can to make yourself happy and don't let other people's opinions of that hold you back from enjoying your life. Nobody on this planet has life completely figured out, and we all struggle from day to day (some more than others). You owe nobody but yourself anything, and truly the only thing that actually matters to each of us, is our happiness and what we desire. Treat yourself best and everyone else good. I know this post probably won't help much of anyone, but if even one person reads it and it helps even the tiniest little bit, I'm glad I took the time to write it out. Everyone have a great day, you are all beautiful in your own ways.

[QUOTE=darksoul69;51756006]So? I was the quiet kid at school and it didn't bother me any. People may or may not have thought I was retarded - didn't give a shit. I put myself out there and made some friends by being persistent. Not many - but the ones I did have were worth the effort. There was a time in jr high where I sat at an all girls table during lunch constantly, made friends with some of them and dated a couple of them. A quarter of the table thought I was disgusting, half of them tolerated me and the other quarter liked me. You said above that you had ADHD and other disorders, but then you said that you didn't want to see a psychiatrist. Are you self diagnosing or were you diagnosed by a professional? Are you taking any meds at all? Because untreated ADHD can ruin your life.[/QUOTE] Even if I don't care if I'm quiet or not, people still think I'm retarded. Everytime I put myself out there I get shit on instantly, being thought of as nothing but a loser trying to feel as if he could get a friend and it made people look at me worse. At least you were still able to make worthy friends and even go on dates with 2 of them. I once also sat with only girls circle during break time, as much as I try not to make them hate me, they just thought I was a creepy stalker and I definitely didn't go on dates with any of them. I'm a loveless idiot, No one really truly ever liked me and each time I try to get close with a girl it's nothing but a fuck up and we end up being nothing but strangers again afterwards. I took an online survey on mental illnesses. I'm not taking any meds because I don't have prescription.

why does it have to be everyone but me. it's getting worse and worse i don't know how much longer i can hold on i want to end this now

[QUOTE=GoldAssassin;51760140] I took an online survey on mental illnesses. I'm not taking any meds because I don't have prescription.[/QUOTE] Yeah, bipolar and ADHD is something you don't want to fuck around with. Get tested and get on meds for it ASAP.

I had an alright day I just got home from my program. I think I'm going to miss going there when it's done. It's only a short term partial hospitalization so I only got another 2 or 3 weeks left. They have other programs after this I'm going to do though but I don't know how long those are

[QUOTE=darksoul69;51761686]Yeah, bipolar and ADHD is something you don't want to fuck around with. Get tested and get on meds for it ASAP.[/QUOTE]As someone who has an extremely high chance of having bipolar due to genetic reasons and what I've experienced, this is very serious. Bipolar is one of those mental illnesses that are just so extreme that it makes life nearly unlivable. Please get help as soon as possible Assassin. I'm unlucky enough to be in an area where I can't even see a psychologist for my issues. [editline]1st February 2017[/editline] [QUOTE=GoldAssassin;51760140]Even if I don't care if I'm quiet or not, people still think I'm retarded. Everytime I put myself out there I get shit on instantly, being thought of as nothing but a loser trying to feel as if he could get a friend and it made people look at me worse. At least you were still able to make worthy friends and even go on dates with 2 of them. I once also sat with only girls circle during break time, as much as I try not to make them hate me, they just thought I was a creepy stalker and I definitely didn't go on dates with any of them. I'm a loveless idiot, No one really truly ever liked me and each time I try to get close with a girl it's nothing but a fuck up and we end up being nothing but strangers again afterwards.[/QUOTE]I probably go through a lot that you do man. You definitely aren't the only one with girl problems. Not even two years ago I had a girl break my heart because we were kicking it off I felt and then she just stopped talking to me out of nowhere. I still haven't heard from her and probably never will. People probably think less of you than you think they think of you. Not in a negative way, I mean that they just really don't care as much as you think they do. Even if someone does get negative thoughts, they probably won't remember them even 2-3 hours after they think them the first time. Also putting yourself out there is honestly a risk for people with mental issues like ours. But you have to realize that life is full of risks, and we have to deal with what we've been dealt. The more you expose yourself to uncomfortable situations and risk, the better you will become and handling and dealing with it. You probably are going to come off as awkward to a lot of people at first, but everyone has to start somewhere. Imagine what people with autism have to go through when they have to learn all the social cues and speech norms that most people inherently understand. They literally have to learn to understand emotion in other people. Not that I'm trying to make you feel worse or discredit what you go through or anything, just offering a little perspective to show it really isn't just you. Even people who have been gifted with little to no mental illness struggle from day to day. Life is just a bitch.

[QUOTE=coyote93;51758299]This is just blatantly wrong. Meds can help you. Sometimes, when people are so stressed and filled with anxiety, that they simply cannot think clearly, they might do stupid things. If they get help and the right kind of meds at the right time, that might help them relax and cut down enough on the stress to actually work in society again. Sometimes people just need a little break from feelings, stress and their typical reactions. Some things can be hard to wrap your head around, and if you slow down your phase to a level where you actually can manage to think things over, that can be very helpful. Not magically, but they can change your thinking pattern and your health. Say, as an example, that you got hypothyroidism, that is something that can lead to depression if your values are wrong, but with the correct treatment you can get your hormones back on track, which probably will help with the depression, if you got one. This might just be my thinking, but this statement, to me, looks just as unhelpful for someone who is feeling suicidal as saying things like; killing yourself equals, eternity in hell, egoism or giving up. People are different, if they want to live, they will find their own motives and reasons for doing so. Trying to persuade someone from doing something by putting your own beliefs over their head helps very little. Are you really going to complain about people venting? And on their reasons to vent? Do you think you will make anyone feel better by saying that their reasons to be depressed ain't as legit as yours or someone else's? If anything, they will probably feel even worse for feeling bad in the first place when people like you come and ask questions like that. You should remember that people have different weaknesses, different lives, different beliefs. Something that seems mundane to you might mean the world to someone else. It's not really fair, or very nice, to enter a thread like this, and start asking questions like that, or to come with accusations. You do know it is possible to get depressed even if you are living what seems to be the perfect life? Depressions, disorders and health problems comes in many forms, and not all of them necessarily have anything to do with past experiences. But of-course, you are right, there might be people here, or on places like this who posts things to get a response telling them how wonderful & valuable they are, but you don't actually know anyone's real reasons for posting. And by asking if their problems really are that bad, and then to make their problems seem petty by comparing them to someone else's; how do you actually think that's going to affect them? I can tell you one thing, it won't make many go [I]"oh hes right, people have it much worse than me other places, so I don't deserve to feel sad or depressed![/I]". I can partially agree with you on this one. The people who have the chance to be independent humans should go for it, but for some people it's not just about overcoming their own feelings, issues or past experiences. Also, a high amount of the population enters one form of depression or another at one point in their life, and when they do, there is nothing wrong with venting out a bit, or asking for help. By this logic the universe wins no matter what one chooses to do, as the plan for everything is to die at one point or another. I, for one, simply cannot see how that is supposed to motivate anyone. You took your time to write a long post here, where you on more than one occasion seem to direct your post at the thread generally. So I'd like to give an answer to your post, even thought parts of it are not directed at me, to go over some of your points where I strongly disagree with you. Oh, btw, let me ask you, do you really think this is the right thread to come and call people with emotional and other similar issues for "[I]Babies suckling out other human emotions[/I]"?[/QUOTE] So what I'm saying is that I can see people talking about being depressed over very trivial things, some of them do indeed seem mundane and not such a big deal as some of them like to make it out, thinking that they have it worse than others, when in fact I don't think that they actually do. I was happy to share my story in terms of just a few things I've been through and showing it as a sign of strength, not giving up, to keep going and doing things when things are bad, to show that there is a chance of things getting better. I have read just a few stories, skim read them, about people thinking about committing suicide, this is wrong, and I've posted that I could be homeless and have no money, and some people have a house and money and they want to kill themselfs, and even if they haven't ever been in a situation like that, like I have they seem to think they have it so bad. I think a lot of people are over stimulating, looking for issues and problems where there are none. I have to disagree with you on the disagree that you said. No pity for a coward. Suicide is a cowards way out. It's not worth it, and what I said makes sense, go and live your life to the fullest you can, have fun and go out and enjoy it, why would you want to think that just because you post on a forum on the internet that people can't see what you write, or how some people think that their family doesn't care about them or love them, I think some of it is indeed attention seeking for some that just want to see if something will care about them when they say they think about suicide, so they say, no don't do that, and that is something they are seeking. Some of these stories, don't seem to me like any reason for suicide, there is none. From what I've posted just a snip of my life I haven't done that, and I don't want to. Take it as a sign of strength and determination that things can get better.

[QUOTE=Van.;51764420]No pity for a coward. Suicide is a cowards way out.[/QUOTE]A disgusting point of view.

[QUOTE=Revelificent;51764431]A disgusting point of view.[/QUOTE] Not at all. [video=youtube;O3Cgpiszvr8]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=O3Cgpiszvr8[/video]

[QUOTE=Van.;51764442]Not at all. [video=youtube;O3Cgpiszvr8]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=O3Cgpiszvr8[/video][/QUOTE]There aren't many people who have much of a right to call anyone a coward, especially considering if they actually went through what most people who end up killing themselves have, they wouldn't be saying something so absurd. Sorry but it's a very ignorant opinion and in my opinion, also disgusting.

[QUOTE=Van.;51764420]No pity for a coward. Suicide is a cowards way out.[/QUOTE] It's not. Putting aside the fact that suicide is usually caused by mental illness I can see legitimate reasons to commit suicide that has nothing to do with depression. Such as medical reasons. Maybe someone has terminal cancer and a month to live. Rather then go through the last couple of weeks getting weaker and slowly dying they choose to commit suicide. Nothing cowardly about that.

Feels like i'm going crazy again. Didn't sleep one fucking bit. I just don't get how i can go from functional to [I]"nothing makes sense"[/I] in 24 hours.

[QUOTE=Van.;51764420]So what I'm saying is that I can see people talking about being depressed over very trivial things, some of them do indeed seem mundane and not such a big deal as some of them like to make it out, thinking that they have it worse than others, when in fact I don't think that they actually do. I was happy to share my story in terms of just a few things I've been through and showing it as a sign of strength, not giving up, to keep going and doing things when things are bad, to show that there is a chance of things getting better. I have read just a few stories, skim read them, about people thinking about committing suicide, this is wrong, and I've posted that I could be homeless and have no money, and some people have a house and money and they want to kill themselfs, and even if they haven't ever been in a situation like that, like I have they seem to think they have it so bad. I think a lot of people are over stimulating, looking for issues and problems where there are none. I have to disagree with you on the disagree that you said. No pity for a coward. Suicide is a cowards way out. It's not worth it, and what I said makes sense, go and live your life to the fullest you can, have fun and go out and enjoy it, why would you want to think that just because you post on a forum on the internet that people can't see what you write, or how some people think that their family doesn't care about them or love them, I think some of it is indeed attention seeking for some that just want to see if something will care about them when they say they think about suicide, so they say, no don't do that, and that is something they are seeking. Some of these stories, don't seem to me like any reason for suicide, there is none. From what I've posted just a snip of my life I haven't done that, and I don't want to. Take it as a sign of strength and determination that things can get better.[/QUOTE] You know nothing about depression , don't speak on it again. Like are you fucking trolling?