Depression, anxiety, suicidalism and similar disorders, issues and troubles V5
4,919 replies, posted
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[QUOTE=Dr. Kyuros;52150234]Relapsed back into feeling bad about [URL="https://facepunch.com/showthread.php?t=1529438&p=52044574&viewfull=1#post52044574"]my situation.[/URL]
Can't be the only one who would feel similarly after, despite our differences, repeatedly try to mend fences, give better advice and even defend them from a rather shitty pedo accusation, only to regardless be ousted as a nutcase and treated as such.[/QUOTE]
That's what you get when you argue with people online.
It's weird, it feels like the abuse I experienced by my mother when she raised me is affecting me more the older I get. Shouldn't it get better instead?
I always have to think about how she told me that she should've aborted me when I was like 6 or that it's my fault that she's going to quit her job and that I destroyed the family etc. Even though that happened a lot of years ago.
I also can't stop thinking about when I got hit for not doing my math homework fast enough in elementary school because I was joking around or how I got slapped and she drove away for several days because I accidently spilled some water when we had family dinner.
I don't have a lot of memories form my childhood and early youth, but the ones I have a mostly negative stuff like this and I can't stop thinking about it, it's just popping up in my mind all the time and I can't do anything about it.
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Ugh, this sucks. I have this feeling of tickling anxiety and fuzziness that comes up whenever I'm not totally distracted by something. I'm a lot better than I was, but sometimes I just feel out of it and strange.
[QUOTE=LordyLord;52150878]Ugh, this sucks. I have this feeling of tickling anxiety and fuzziness that comes up whenever I'm not totally distracted by something. I'm a lot better than I was, but sometimes I just feel out of it and strange.[/QUOTE]
I feel similar and I hate it so much. If I'm not distracted by games or youtube then I start thinking about myself and I get really negative, stressed out, and sad.
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Hey all, I just wanted to say that you should keep living.
3 months ago, I was so severely depressed and anxiety ridden that I literally couldn't stay awake or move in the middle of the day. I got so incredibly bad to the point where I couldn't even talk to someone without looking like a drugged out freak, falling asleep mid discussion. This was because of a combination of things... such as spraining both my ankles in the summer, family problems, suburban isolation, thinking I had carpal tunnel but never knowing if I really did (Turned out just to be my immense anxiety making my wrist numb, go figure.)
I'm not sure if you've ever seen Get Out, but there is a scene in that movie where the main character is hypnotized... and he is stuck in a void watching his life happen from far away. That's exactly how I felt, every day for months on end. I couldn't feel anything. Taking my own life seemed like the easiest way out of the situation. I was considering it 10 times a day, especially around high places.
I finally got help. I got a psychologist, who told me I needed a psychiatrist immediately. The first anti depressant I took didn't work... the second one (Setraline) did. Setraline has really set me back to being a functional human being. Like, I actually have the energy to move and want to talk to people now. I can actually enjoy the presence of my own brain. Everything isn't perfect, nor will it ever be. I obviously still have my days and hours of feeling like pure shit... but don't we all? The psychologist really helped put a perspective on the way my brain repeats itself. Now that I'm aware of it, I can notice the patterns and try my best to counter them.
At the very least... the next time you feel like you're falling... or when you want to just lay down and feel like pure shit for the rest of the day... Don't. Get up and do something. Play a musical instrument if you do, watch a movie that you know will cheer you up. Call someone. Talk to your family.
This shit really sucks... I know... [b]but it gets better.[/b] I don't have a perfect life right now. One of my ankles still makes it so I cant walk without pain on random days. The repeated thought process of still being a kissless virgin still eats away at me as well... but fuck man... at least I can still walk. At least I can talk to people now... at least I can be alive.
You can do it, get some help. If you can't call a psychologist or psychiatrist yourself, ask a family member or close friend to schedule it for you. This is what saved me.
Life is worth living.
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[QUOTE=Crpto2007;52150774]I got prescribed 2 new drugs for my depression and insomnia. Mirtazapine and escitalopram along with the seroquel still because the seroquel does help my psychosis but not the depression so much[/QUOTE]
Mirtazapine helped me tons with insomnia when I took it. Unfortunately the sedating effects would last thorughout the day too, here's hoping it works for you!
I don't know how to say this but I feel like I'm gonna explode but I got off the phone with my sister and turned out she has cancer of the thyroid and I am not sure how to take this news. My anxiety and depression have been all over the place recently and I feel like I've reached a new low at this point. I can't handle or deal with this I feel like I'm gonna shut down. It's real fucked up that I'm assuming the worst and I don't think I can handle it if it will get worse.
Does anyone know what that weird sensory sensation, almost like a mix of heat flashes and restless leg syndrome, you get when you're quitting an antidepressant is called? I can't quite properly explain it, does anyone know what I'm talking about?
[QUOTE=MrJazzy;52152775]Does anyone know what that weird sensory sensation, almost like a mix of heat flashes and restless leg syndrome, you get when you're quitting an antidepressant is called? I can't quite properly explain it, does anyone know what I'm talking about?[/QUOTE]
Antidepressant discontinuation syndrome? this happens most commonly with SSRIs and SNRIs
[QUOTE=mchapra;52152732]I don't know how to say this but I feel like I'm gonna explode but I got off the phone with my sister and turned out she has cancer of the thyroid and I am not sure how to take this news. My anxiety and depression have been all over the place recently and I feel like I've reached a new low at this point. I can't handle or deal with this I feel like I'm gonna shut down. It's real fucked up that I'm assuming the worst and I don't think I can handle it if it will get worse.[/QUOTE]
My friend had thyroid cancer as well. It's one of the more treatable cancers since for most cases they just make you take radioactive iodine and it destroys it, though you'll have to take synthetic thyroid hormones for the rest of your life.
Still, I hope they pull through. It's not fun hearing someone you care about get diagnosed with that.
[QUOTE=Live2becool;52151893]Hey all, I just wanted to say that you should keep living.
3 months ago, I was so severely depressed and anxiety ridden that I literally couldn't stay awake or move in the middle of the day. I got so incredibly bad to the point where I couldn't even talk to someone without looking like a drugged out freak, falling asleep mid discussion. This was because of a combination of things... such as spraining both my ankles in the summer, family problems, suburban isolation, thinking I had carpal tunnel but never knowing if I really did (Turned out just to be my immense anxiety making my wrist numb, go figure.)
I'm not sure if you've ever seen Get Out, but there is a scene in that movie where the main character is hypnotized... and he is stuck in a void watching his life happen from far away. That's exactly how I felt, every day for months on end. I couldn't feel anything. Taking my own life seemed like the easiest way out of the situation. I was considering it 10 times a day, especially around high places.
I finally got help. I got a psychologist, who told me I needed a psychiatrist immediately. The first anti depressant I took didn't work... the second one (Setraline) did. Setraline has really set me back to being a functional human being. Like, I actually have the energy to move and want to talk to people now. I can actually enjoy the presence of my own brain. Everything isn't perfect, nor will it ever be. I obviously still have my days and hours of feeling like pure shit... but don't we all? The psychologist really helped put a perspective on the way my brain repeats itself. Now that I'm aware of it, I can notice the patterns and try my best to counter them.
At the very least... the next time you feel like you're falling... or when you want to just lay down and feel like pure shit for the rest of the day... Don't. Get up and do something. Play a musical instrument if you do, watch a movie that you know will cheer you up. Call someone. Talk to your family.
This shit really sucks... I know... [b]but it gets better.[/b] I don't have a perfect life right now. One of my ankles still makes it so I cant walk without pain on random days. The repeated thought process of still being a kissless virgin still eats away at me as well... but fuck man... at least I can still walk. At least I can talk to people now... at least I can be alive.
You can do it, get some help. If you can't call a psychologist or psychiatrist yourself, ask a family member or close friend to schedule it for you. This is what saved me.
Life is worth living.[/QUOTE]
glad that you have a positive mindset, hopefully your ankle will heal completely, life is indeed worth living.
My dad was diagnosed with MDS a while back, its a rare blood cancer. It really sucks and it drives me crazy sonetimes too. Just wanna let you know you arent alone man.
today was okay. i'm happy about this.
[QUOTE=Live2becool;52151893]Hey all, I just wanted to say that you should keep living.
3 months ago, I was so severely depressed and anxiety ridden that I literally couldn't stay awake or move in the middle of the day. I got so incredibly bad to the point where I couldn't even talk to someone without looking like a drugged out freak, falling asleep mid discussion. This was because of a combination of things... such as spraining both my ankles in the summer, family problems, suburban isolation, thinking I had carpal tunnel but never knowing if I really did (Turned out just to be my immense anxiety making my wrist numb, go figure.)
I'm not sure if you've ever seen Get Out, but there is a scene in that movie where the main character is hypnotized... and he is stuck in a void watching his life happen from far away. That's exactly how I felt, every day for months on end. I couldn't feel anything. Taking my own life seemed like the easiest way out of the situation. I was considering it 10 times a day, especially around high places.
I finally got help. I got a psychologist, who told me I needed a psychiatrist immediately. The first anti depressant I took didn't work... the second one (Setraline) did. Setraline has really set me back to being a functional human being. Like, I actually have the energy to move and want to talk to people now. I can actually enjoy the presence of my own brain. Everything isn't perfect, nor will it ever be. I obviously still have my days and hours of feeling like pure shit... but don't we all? The psychologist really helped put a perspective on the way my brain repeats itself. Now that I'm aware of it, I can notice the patterns and try my best to counter them.
At the very least... the next time you feel like you're falling... or when you want to just lay down and feel like pure shit for the rest of the day... Don't. Get up and do something. Play a musical instrument if you do, watch a movie that you know will cheer you up. Call someone. Talk to your family.
This shit really sucks... I know... [b]but it gets better.[/b] I don't have a perfect life right now. One of my ankles still makes it so I cant walk without pain on random days. The repeated thought process of still being a kissless virgin still eats away at me as well... but fuck man... at least I can still walk. At least I can talk to people now... at least I can be alive.
You can do it, get some help. If you can't call a psychologist or psychiatrist yourself, ask a family member or close friend to schedule it for you. This is what saved me.
Life is worth living.[/QUOTE]
Sertraline is fucking awesome
It's not the fact that I got shit on by the bus driver today that get me mad.
Neither the fact that I was so sleepy I couldn't talk back at that asshole.
Or the fact that it all happened in front of my friend and love interest and made me look like a fucking nutty.
The thing that drove me insane today, to the point of breaking some of the shit I use at work, is that I simply [B]cannot explain whatever the fuck happened to anyone without messing up the sentences or mixing up the words.[/B] IT WAS A FIVE(5) WORD SENTENCE IN MY FUCKING HEAD I COULDN'T SPELL RIGHT.
After that, everyone just stopped talking to me. They probably thought I was crazy and mad at everyone, but I was only angry at myself.
And I had to head back home with that girl next to me on the train in the most awkward silence I've ever experienced in my fucking life.
I don't think she wants to hang around with me anymore. I really liked her and her company, but I don't want to be a charity case, so honestly I don't blame her if she doesn't.
The problem is always me, not even myself wants to deal with me.
God I hate myself so fucking much.
It's so fucking hard to get a job, especially when you have gaps in your CV from stress, burnouts and psychological tiredness. The last job I had, I worked my ass off but in the end I got daily anxiety attacks without even thinking of anything. Felt like I was constantly fainting and I had to quit.
If you even mention anything related to your psyche in job-interviews, you can bet your ass they will not hire you. Just happened to me last week, only I had to talk to a friend that works there to know. It fucking angers me that you have to fake it up and pretend, to get a job. And then there will be some schmuck with masters degree in sitting behind a desk at the groceries that will get it anyway..
[QUOTE=SebiWarrior;52149585]Is there something that can take your mind off things?
It's not a fix, but it can relieve the pressure so you can better focus later[/QUOTE]
I used to go to the gym in my town, but I don't live there anymore so today I just had to spend 20 bucks and 20 a month to get a planet fitness membership because that's all there is within walking distance.
It's a good 2 mile walk mostly uphill. I just got back from exercising and it felt okay. I mean it could be better. I just think it's sick that people (one person actually) lied to me telling me my ex best friend is suffering like they're trying to convince me karma struck her when it didn't.
This is a sad case of people telling me "what I want to hear" so if I do go off the deep end and kill myself from one trauma after the next (and they see it coming just like I do) that I'll "die peacefully" while my ex best friend lives on in a perfect life of luxury she doesn't even deserve.
[QUOTE=IJNOMED;52157689]I used to go to the gym in my town, but I don't live there anymore so today I just had to spend 20 bucks and 20 a month to get a planet fitness membership because that's all there is within walking distance.
It's a good 2 mile walk mostly uphill. I just got back from exercising and it felt okay. I mean it could be better. I just think it's sick that people (one person actually) lied to me telling me my ex best friend is suffering like they're trying to convince me karma struck her when it didn't.
This is a sad case of people telling me "what I want to hear" so if I do go off the deep end and kill myself from one trauma after the next (and they see it coming just like I do) that I'll "die peacefully" while my ex best friend lives on in a perfect life of luxury she doesn't even deserve.[/QUOTE]
Hey, I know you feel bad thanks to this, but always remember: even if somebody doesn't seem to be suffering now, that doesn't mean their good times will last forever either. Both the good and the bad will show up in almost everybody's life at some point, save for a lucky few insulated from the shocks of living a real life like most of us have to. Karma may take time to take effect, but when it does, she's a cold bitch.
My mom always used to tell me that some people suffer a lot when they're younger, often for no discernible reasons, but if they tough it out somehow, eventually the bad times end and they'll be rewarded. She also told me that it's always better to realize that the only thing we own are our actions, not the results thereof, otherwise we'll just be disappointed if our actions didn't yield an expected result. I can tell you this much, since I've suffered many disappointments in my own life that money doesn't really come close to making up for. When I came to this realization myself, it helped me to become a calmer, much more collected individual.
Please try to survive for as long as possible. You're a tough cookie, and I know you can survive even what you're going through now if you try. I know you're upset that they lied to you, but maybe they thought that saying this would make you feel a little better. Sometimes people don't know any better but believe they're doing good even if it backfires. You know how they say that the road to hell is paved with good intentions. On the other hand, if they maliciously did it to make you suffer more, they'll pay for that too soon enough. The law of boomerang is an inevitable part of life, sooner or later we'll be called to account for our actions, whether to be rewarded for them or punished for our mistakes.
[QUOTE=Zonesylvania;52157732]Hey, I know you feel bad thanks to this, but always remember: even if somebody doesn't seem to be suffering now, that doesn't mean their good times will last forever either. Both the good and the bad will show up in almost everybody's life at some point, save for a lucky few insulated from the shocks of living a real life like most of us have to. Karma may take time to take effect, but when it does, she's a cold bitch.
My mom always used to tell me that some people suffer a lot when they're younger, often for no discernible reasons, but if they tough it out somehow, eventually the bad times end and they'll be rewarded. She also told me that it's always better to realize that the only thing we own are our actions, not the results thereof, otherwise we'll just be disappointed if our actions didn't yield an expected result. I can tell you this much, since I've suffered many disappointments in my own life that money doesn't really come close to making up for. When I came to this realization myself, it helped me to become a calmer, much more collected individual.
Please try to survive for as long as possible. You're a tough cookie, and I know you can survive even what you're going through now if you try. I know you're upset that they lied to you, but maybe they thought that saying this would make you feel a little better. Sometimes people don't know any better but believe they're doing good even if it backfires. You know how they say that the road to hell is paved with good intentions. On the other hand, if they maliciously did it to make you suffer more, they'll pay for that too soon enough. The law of boomerang is an inevitable part of life, sooner or later we'll be called to account for our actions, whether to be rewarded for them or punished for our mistakes.[/QUOTE]
My heart tells me they did it with good intentions... I know all she does is play steam and trash talk me like a cocky pidgeon every now and then with her small possee of internet friends that dont know any better, I feel like we need less broken people. But at the same time we need less assholes so she needs to be kocked down some pegs for what she's done to me (and her mom because she abused her mom too)
So, in a sense it's immature of me to want to see her suffer for what she did to me and I realize that's a human reaction/feeling to have especially after seeing them live perfectly and happily ever after. I try to tell myself to block her out completely from my mind but the occasional night terrors I have of what she did to me pull me full circle back into the trauma I experienced and it results in anger towards her for sleeping comfortably after all she's done to me without suffering.
And thank you, and facepunch for listening to me endlessly ramble on about this really excessivley awful life that I was dropped into. I've counted every small blessing and milestone and learned some stuff (About the girlfriend problem, even though I wound up losing all the weight and getting strong I still couldn't find anybody, my girlfriend now is emotionally amazing for me and supportive/understanding, even though she isn't what I normally would have gone for she's beautiful in a different way.)
My gastro doctor prescribed me some imipramine for pain and for my lack of sleep. It's only like 25mg, but I'm not really sure what to expect because I've never taken any kind of antidepressant before.
If anyone has any experience with it, lemme know! I'm hoping that plus going back on B12 and D2 supplements will help while I'm stuck in this hell-house of no peace and quiet.
[QUOTE=Pascall;52157842]My gastro doctor prescribed me some imipramine for pain and for my lack of sleep. It's only like 25mg, but I'm not really sure what to expect because I've never taken any kind of antidepressant before.
If anyone has any experience with it, lemme know! I'm hoping that plus going back on B12 and D2 supplements will help while I'm stuck in this hell-house of no peace and quiet.[/QUOTE]
Important side effects you have to watch out for are mostly constitutional ones (dizziness, dry mouth, sweating, excitement, weight loss or gain, tiredness, sunlight sensitivity, etc.) You may wind up with nightmares if you're unlucky. If you're already on MAOIs, SNRIs, or SSRIs, dont take imipramine, it interacts negatively with all three categories of drug, though this is moot since you havent taken any antidepressants before. And be [I]especially[/I] careful if you've had suicidal thoughts recently because it can reinforce them heavily.
[QUOTE=Zonesylvania;52157865]Important side effects you have to watch out for are mostly constitutional ones (dizziness, dry mouth, sweating, excitement, weight loss or gain, tiredness, sunlight sensitivity, etc.) You may wind up with nightmares if you're unlucky. If you're already on MAOIs, SNRIs, or SSRIs, dont take imipramine, it interacts negatively with all three categories of drug, though this is moot since you havent taken any antidepressants before. And be [I]especially[/I] careful if you've had suicidal thoughts recently because it can reinforce them heavily.[/QUOTE]
Not sure if prozac can make suicidal feelings even stronger but I got the hell off of it. (I was on the generic named version fluxotene something) and it made me absolutely mental. I had tremors and wound up in the hospital panicking and shaking as if I was going to have a seizure and I had poor motor control over my hands and was shaky for a long week or so afterwards.
[QUOTE=Zonesylvania;52157865]Important side effects you have to watch out for are mostly constitutional ones (dizziness, dry mouth, sweating, excitement, weight loss or gain, tiredness, sunlight sensitivity, etc.) You may wind up with nightmares if you're unlucky. If you're already on MAOIs, SNRIs, or SSRIs, dont take imipramine, it interacts negatively with all three categories of drug, though this is moot since you havent taken any antidepressants before. And be [I]especially[/I] careful if you've had suicidal thoughts recently because it can reinforce them heavily.[/QUOTE]
I haven't taken any other antidepressants in the past or right now, nah. The only thing I take right now is Dicyclomine for abdominal pain as needed, plus my inhalers for asthma.
I'm hoping the low dosage won't yield too many side effects or anything. But I'm optimistic about it.
Depression, anxiety, suicidalism and similar disorders, issues and troubles V5
