Serious Zombie Survival Thread. - General

[QUOTE=johanz;18664011]You won't have enough hands.[/QUOTE] ill just put one on each appendage including penis.

Make or find a Fallout shelter. You'd be safe in the event a nuke goes off (presumabely to get rid of the zombies), or safe from the zombies because: 1. Zombies cannot break down a 6 foot thick metal blast door. 2. Its at least 10 feet underground, with about 3 feet of concrete. As for food and water - I'd like to have about 42 (3 1/2 years) worth of food, and I would have an underground well. Just wait them out - all things die, especially when there is no food or anything for them. Their bodies would eventually decompose so badly that the wouldn't be able to move. :smug: [editline]10:33AM[/editline] [QUOTE=Comtochus;18663785]I highly doubt most Facepunchers have access to firearms. Even in the United States, there are countless regulations that limit firearm sales to pistols (mainly 9mm) and shotguns (3 shells loaded max). In Florida, store owners, shooting ranges, hunters, and security guards seem to be the only ones who can buy firearms. What about during the zombie apocalypse? Unless you have people who trust you enough to hand you a gun, you're more likely to get shot.[/QUOTE] There are 4 guns to every American. Guns wouldn't be a problem, and that's not counting the ones in stores. But I do agree, most of us would shit ourselves if a zombie came near us. Thats why you sit underground and wait the bastards out. I mean, seriously guys, if one of your family members or friends started trying to kill you, would you be able to be like "Boom, headshot!"?

First of all, quit saying zombies aren't possible, be serious about their existance or gtfo thread. It's called serious zombie survival thread, but doesn't look like one, expect from the first post. Fix it. [b]How does the apocalypse start?[/b] If people would have been announced about a failed lab test about making humen immune to all swine to mammoth or whale -flu, shit, turning out to became z-virus or something, people would have prepared and stuff. Anyway, from my point of view, this was a surprise. Like the virus spread with mutanted giant mosquitos that hurt some people, who were taken to hospital where they lost their humanity and became flesh eating monsters. [b]What would I do?[/b] Anyway, it's day and my parents are at work and my littlebrother is still at school or with his friends. So, I wouldn't care about my family at this point, they would just panic and try to call police, which would be useless, since the police is already busy and the lines are full. First thing would be contacting my friends/hc airsoft team, for the gear and survival knowledge. I would just get all my useful gear and supplies around my house, all possible batteries I could find, rope and stuff. A little box filled with random spareparts from electric devices. Good flashlight, the Zombie Survival Guide ofcourse, sleepingbag, a small tent and other stuff. However not too much to carry, so I can still run a bit. I would also take all cash from the house (basicly my littlebrothers :P) because it would be more useful than a credit card. Then I would head to my friends houses, grouping up with them and finding more useful gear. When we would be all ready, with enought supplies for about week for everyone, expect drinks, since it's too heavy and pretty easy to get anyway. Ofcourse carrying it for atleast a day for everyone. Weaponry would be useless here, since no real firearms are avaible at our aparments or anything, however a realistic airsoft pistol would be useful, since it's fairly plausible we might have to scare people with it, like when looting grocery store or something. Then we would head out of capital city, to some place with less people, meaning less zombies and less attention. Also at country, older people may have firearms, like shotguns at farms or something. They would be handy, if we would encounter a treath. [b]Good to know[/b] It's nice to remember, that on a zombie apocalypse or any other great disaster, people don't give shit about laws and go to anarchy. When this happens, you won't be safe around unknown people, just that you are lost somewhere and find some people, doesn't mean rescue. They can rob all the stuff and supplies you have left and kill you, so don't trust them. Tho leaving city makes it a bit safer, you shouldn't go to wilderness, without any buildings nearby. Without proper clothing and tents and sleeping bags, you will face the cruel nature, decreasing your chances or survival. So it's good to sleep in a building or other cover from wind and weather. Also, never let everyone sleep at same time, have a pair to keep eyes on the surroundings while others can sleep confortable. You do not wan't to wake up getting eaten alive. ;)

[QUOTE=Nitro-Trucker;18645182]Precisely this: :suicide:[/QUOTE] Rather have fun and kill zombies and die by a zombie than not have fun and die early.

Stick with people who look like they could defend themselves quite well and try to be as helpful as I can.

How can a zombie thread be any serious considering zombies are imaginary?

12 gauge, gas, take a jeep into the shannondoah mountains and live it out peacefully. It also depends what zombies you're talking about, the cool, slow and dead zombies, or this dumb new age virus shit?

Most people who claim that they'll survive during a zombie apocalypse. Or the one's who cockily expose their weaponry/firearms to other people while boasting out their 'plan', are usually the one's who generally die first. The unexpected types of people usually survive events such as these, not the one's who show off their guns, plans, and think that they're practically invulnerable.

Uh. Zombies can't climb and I live in a second floor flat which have heavy, metal doors. I'm safe, even though it wouldn't happen - I'd probably think I was smoking too much weed....

[QUOTE=RagaMuffin;18666693]Uh. Zombies can't climb and I live in a second floor flat which have heavy, metal doors. I'm safe, even though it wouldn't happen - I'd probably think I was smoking too much weed....[/QUOTE] You need food to live

[QUOTE=Perfumly;18666758]You need food to live[/QUOTE] Since when?!

[QUOTE=varj;18666848]Since when?![/QUOTE] Exactly. Food is way overrated.

If shit hits the fan (Not exactly a ZS survival plan, but it would work for almost any situation other than natural disasters) Just go build up a cabin on my 85 acres take a couple guns and a select few friends and live off the land.

The biodome

I'm working on a guide now. I will put it on the internet somewhere and link to it. It outlines what I would do. [editline]04:38PM[/editline] Here it is: [url]http://www.mediafire.com/file/mntwo5mvj[/url]

[QUOTE=Mac2468;18645485]I hate you guys who are always reminding me that zombies are physically impossible.[/QUOTE] That's not totally true... If it was from an infection like L4D zombies then it could be possible. But the living undead? No. (Also note tanks boomers and other stuff like that MIGHT be possible if the virus were to mutate that much.)

What is up with everyone signing their posts?

:suicide:

Dear Mister B, I am not sure Sincerely, [indent]Perfumly[/indent]

[QUOTE=rosar098;18667213]I'm working on a guide now. I will put it on the internet somewhere and link to it. It outlines what I would do. [editline]04:38PM[/editline] Here it is: [url]http://www.mediafire.com/file/mntwo5mvj[/url][/QUOTE] [img]http://farm3.static.flickr.com/2694/4148017537_e7cc052214_o.png[/img] :c00lbert:

All right, I assume we're talking about the much more dangerous slow zombies than the fast zombies (which resemble more retarded vampires than anything else). In that case, the first thing I will assume that this is a Class 3 outbreak, as outlined in the Zombie Survival Guide. If that's the case, well, I'll probably try to stay within my apartment. I know almost everyone in my apartment so we'd work well together. We also have very diversified residents, each with their own different talents and skills. What I'd do. -Since we already have a LOT of supplies stocked up (not for the zombie apocalypse, but in the event of any kind of natural disaster...I do live in New Orleans after all), they wouldn't be a problem. Neither are guns and ammo, since a few of my apartment buddies owns a LOT of guns. So what to do first? Demolish the staircase to the first floor. Once that's done, the entire apartment is now secured. Next step? Buckle down and wait for it to end. (Did I mention I really don't like fast zombies/retarded vampires? K, just wondering.)

How the fuck are slow zombies more dangerous than fast zombies? [editline]06:03PM[/editline] Or retarded vampires. [editline]06:04PM[/editline] [sp]They're ZOMBIES, Francis.[/sp]

Step one: Find some Africans. Step two: Get seeds and some crap to remove the salt from salt water. Step three: Get a boat and take it to a nice tropical island. Step four: Have the Africans teach me to grow corn and how to survive in hot climates because they are just that way. Step five: Live a life of ease and wait it all out in peace.

[QUOTE=Mister B;18670880]How the fuck are slow zombies more dangerous than fast zombies? [editline]06:03PM[/editline] Or retarded vampires. [editline]06:04PM[/editline] [sp]They're ZOMBIES, Francis.[/sp][/QUOTE] In every zombie game, slow zombies always have more health points than their weaker but more agile counterparts, duh.

[QUOTE=Mister B;18670880]How the fuck are slow zombies more dangerous than fast zombies? [editline]06:03PM[/editline] Or retarded vampires. [editline]06:04PM[/editline] [sp]They're ZOMBIES, Francis.[/sp][/QUOTE] Oh, let's see, slow zombies can walk on the fucking ocean floor, you need goddamn headshots to kill them, otherwise they're nearly indestructible. I know there are exceptions (like the DOTD remake), but as a rule of thumb fast zombies are usually much more easier to kill since they're not, you know, really zombies (28 Days Later, L4D, Zombieland). Fast, sure. Easier to kill? Yes. Plus, they're just fucking stupid. Allow me to quote Simon Pegg, since he sums up my feelings perfectly: "I know it is absurd to debate the rules of a reality that does not exist, but this genuinely irks me. You cannot kill a vampire with an MDF stake; werewolves can't fly; zombies do not run. It's a misconception, a bastardization that diminishes a classic movie monster. The best phantasmagoria uses reality to render the inconceivable conceivable. The speedy zombie seems implausible to me, even within the fantastic realm it inhabits. A biological agent, I'll buy. Some sort of super-virus? Sure, why not. But death? Death is a disability, not a superpower. It's hard to run with a cold, let alone the most debilitating malady of them all. ..."Another thing: speed simplifies the zombie, clarifying the threat and reducing any response to an emotional reflex. It's the difference between someone shouting "Boo!" and hearing the sound of the floorboards creaking in an upstairs room: a quick thrill at the expense of a more profound sense of dread." "Zack Snyder's effective but pointless reboot (Dawn of the Dead remake) parlayed Boyle's "infected" (28 days Later) into the upgraded zombie 2.0, likely at the behest of some cigar-chomping, focus-group-happy movie exec desperate to satisfy the MTV generation's demand for quicker everything - quicker food, quicker downloads, quicker dead people. The zombie was ushered on to the mainstream stage, on the proviso that it sprinted up to the mic. The genre was diminished, and I think it's a shame." So yeah. That's why. ...Even if I think the ultimate zombie apocalypse would be having both [url=http://www.themorningstarsaga.com/thestrain.html]Sprinters and Shamblers.[/url]

The Amish people, the Amish. They live in isolation and are self-sufficient. Gotta think of the long-term goals.

[QUOTE=LiquidNazgul;18671117]Oh, let's see, slow zombies can walk on the fucking ocean floor, you need goddamn headshots to kill them, otherwise they're nearly indestructible. I know there are exceptions (like the DOTD remake), but as a rule of thumb fast zombies are usually much more easier to kill since they're not, you know, really zombies (28 Days Later, L4D, Zombieland). Fast, sure. Easier to kill? Yes. Plus, they're just fucking stupid. Allow me to quote Simon Pegg, since he sums up my feelings perfectly: "I know it is absurd to debate the rules of a reality that does not exist, but this genuinely irks me. You cannot kill a vampire with an MDF stake; werewolves can't fly; zombies do not run. It's a misconception, a bastardization that diminishes a classic movie monster. The best phantasmagoria uses reality to render the inconceivable conceivable. The speedy zombie seems implausible to me, even within the fantastic realm it inhabits. A biological agent, I'll buy. Some sort of super-virus? Sure, why not. But death? Death is a disability, not a superpower. It's hard to run with a cold, let alone the most debilitating malady of them all. ..."Another thing: speed simplifies the zombie, clarifying the threat and reducing any response to an emotional reflex. It's the difference between someone shouting "Boo!" and hearing the sound of the floorboards creaking in an upstairs room: a quick thrill at the expense of a more profound sense of dread." "Zack Snyder's effective but pointless reboot (Dawn of the Dead remake) parlayed Boyle's "infected" (28 days Later) into the upgraded zombie 2.0, likely at the behest of some cigar-chomping, focus-group-happy movie exec desperate to satisfy the MTV generation's demand for quicker everything - quicker food, quicker downloads, quicker dead people. The zombie was ushered on to the mainstream stage, on the proviso that it sprinted up to the mic. The genre was diminished, and I think it's a shame." So yeah. That's why. ...Even if I think the ultimate zombie apocalypse would be having both [url=http://www.themorningstarsaga.com/thestrain.html]Sprinters and Shamblers.[/url][/QUOTE] If it were the slow zombies then I could outrun an entire horde :colbert:

[QUOTE=LiquidNazgul;18671117]Oh, let's see, slow zombies can walk on the fucking ocean floor, you need goddamn headshots to kill them, otherwise they're nearly indestructible. I know there are exceptions (like the DOTD remake), but as a rule of thumb fast zombies are usually much more easier to kill since they're not, you know, really zombies (28 Days Later, L4D, Zombieland). Fast, sure. Easier to kill? Yes. Plus, they're just fucking stupid. Allow me to quote Simon Pegg, since he sums up my feelings perfectly: "I know it is absurd to debate the rules of a reality that does not exist, but this genuinely irks me. You cannot kill a vampire with an MDF stake; werewolves can't fly; zombies do not run. It's a misconception, a bastardization that diminishes a classic movie monster. The best phantasmagoria uses reality to render the inconceivable conceivable. The speedy zombie seems implausible to me, even within the fantastic realm it inhabits. A biological agent, I'll buy. Some sort of super-virus? Sure, why not. But death? Death is a disability, not a superpower. It's hard to run with a cold, let alone the most debilitating malady of them all. ..."Another thing: speed simplifies the zombie, clarifying the threat and reducing any response to an emotional reflex. It's the difference between someone shouting "Boo!" and hearing the sound of the floorboards creaking in an upstairs room: a quick thrill at the expense of a more profound sense of dread." "Zack Snyder's effective but pointless reboot (Dawn of the Dead remake) parlayed Boyle's "infected" (28 days Later) into the upgraded zombie 2.0, likely at the behest of some cigar-chomping, focus-group-happy movie exec desperate to satisfy the MTV generation's demand for quicker everything - quicker food, quicker downloads, quicker dead people. The zombie was ushered on to the mainstream stage, on the proviso that it sprinted up to the mic. The genre was diminished, and I think it's a shame." So yeah. That's why. ...Even if I think the ultimate zombie apocalypse would be having both [url=http://www.themorningstarsaga.com/thestrain.html]Sprinters and Shamblers.[/url][/QUOTE] Who's to say that the fast zombies couldn't walk (well, run) on the ocean floor and any of those? It could just be a slow zombie that runs. Most examples in the media just soften them up because they can't be all powerful.

[QUOTE=Swimbound;18671234]If it were the slow zombies then I could outrun an entire horde :colbert:[/QUOTE] Oh yeah, fun. Now you have an entire horde trailing you. And unlike you, they're not just gonna get bored and wander away, and they sure as hell aren't going to get tired, unlike you. See, if you're running from them, you'll probably be sweating (you'll probably be sweating anyway from running away from walking cannibalistic corpses). Guess what? They're going to keep track of your scent for miles. And miles. And miles. And miles.

[QUOTE=LiquidNazgul;18671299]Oh yeah, fun. Now you have an entire horde trailing you. And unlike you, they're not just gonna get bored and wander away, and they sure as hell aren't going to get tired, unlike you. See, if you're running from them, you'll probably be sweating (you'll probably be sweating anyway from running away from walking cannibalistic corpses). Guess what? They're going to keep track of your scent for miles. And miles. And miles. And miles.[/QUOTE] Because a car is so hard to come by.