• Stories of badass teachers
    262 replies, posted
I had an amazing teacher throughout High School. He taught Communications Technology (Photography, slight Photoshop and InDesign, Screenprinting, Vinyl Cutting, etc) but was a total badass. If you were caught texting, he'd take your phone and call who was texting you so he could tell them to stop texting his student while their in class. If you made him mad you'd either have a stapler thrown at you or if he liked you then he'd pick you up and put you into a trash can. Unfortunately, he had a bad motorcycle accident so he couldn't lift things after that. If you fell asleep and had a water bottle, he'd take it and put a reasonably sized hole near the top of the lid and then wake you up to say "If you don't drink the rest of this water in 30 seconds you're getting a referral." Then everyone watches as the student spills water all over him or herself. His best prank of all was the day he decided that he was going to fake a heart attack in the middle of class. While talking to a student or two, he clasped his hands over his heart and fell out of his chair shaking. The students freaked out, all the girls started crying while the boys started calling 911 and ran for help. Of course before things got too out-of-hand he got up with a huge grin. I'm not sure if he got in trouble for it, but he never did it again. If you're wondering how a teacher could do this and not be fired, he already taught long enough to retire at this point so it wouldn't have mattered to him. Sadly though, he finally did retire the year I graduated because of a stroke. Still alive, just not teaching.
"Today we will make nitroglycerin, Outside. With 6 foot sticks. And plastic beakers, With a wall nearby" We did and we detonated it. The teacher estimated that we made enough to blow up a sizable tiger into a Bengal smoothie.
I had a science teacher that made raps on the spot all the time to help teach his lessons that's it though
Our school's physics and chemistry teacher is a former Afghanistan peacekeeper. Cool guy.
I had a scottish physics teacher who crashed a harrier while he was in the RAF. also would come in on mondays hung over.
My form tutor went to this 'school party' we had wearing a John Travolta suit.
[QUOTE=Lemmiwinks!;26998735][url]http://www.thisisgloucestershire.co.uk/news/Paedophile-teacher-Cheltenham-jailed/article-2159678-detail/article.html[/url] I'm not joking. It says in the article he had almost 190,000 CP images.[/QUOTE] 190,000, and that was after he burnt 2 HDDs
There were two computer administrators at my primary school. One uptight dick who seemed to do nothing, and the guy who actually did all the work and never talked. One day I decided to talk to him. We ended up playing Call of Duty 2 LAN on the 2 gaming computers he had set up in a massive empty supply closet. And last year I had a science teacher who caught a kid throwing paper planes, he then grabbed the plane out of the air, deconstructed it and explained all the physics around why it flew. Then lit it on fire and threw it on the kids desk as punishment. There was also an exchange in my English class once: Annoying student: (to someone in class) "Shut up you cunt!" Teacher: "(Student's name), I'm fairly sure you wouldn't know what a cunt was if it slapped you in the face." Oh and I also have a music teacher who teaches us valuable life lessons, such as not to have unprotected sex or else you will get syphillis like Schubert, and if you become a jazz musician not to take TOO many drugs.
[QUOTE=Louis;26999330]I had some cool old teacher, dead now or something. Let me and my friend get away with ANYTHING. Like, we were having a maths test and he just came over, told me and my friend to step outside and gave us his briefcase full of playing cards and other random shit a teacher shouldn't have, whole class was doing a test and we were playing cards. Too bad he's dead.[/QUOTE] Some crazy wacky shennanigans in 2nd grade ey? Fuckin rebels.
I had sub with one arm. At the beginning of class he told us we were going to watch a shark movie, he claimed he knew more about sharks than anyone in this class. I thought it was because his arm was bitten off by a shark, turns out he had just watched the first half hour of the movie before class.
Our chemistry teacher was a small, quiet mom-type woman that noone like or respected until the day she showed us thermite in the school backyard.
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[QUOTE=PunchedInFac;27022115]A stick or two broke and a pussy-ass student said he got hurt. Teach leaned down next to him and then said: [b]"Pain is weakness leaving the body. [/b]Now get up before I set you on horse duty for the rest of the period"[/QUOTE] Is your PE teacher the Soldier?
Every Friday in Info Tech, we are allowed to bring in our game consoles/games or whatever and we play games all class. Our teacher usually brings in his Xbox so we usually bring in a "school-appropriate" game like Blur and play it. Pretty fun way to end the week since it's my last block.
back in 9th grade, our teacher caught the class stoner asleep in class, so he decided to tie his shoelaces to the chair, yell FIRE, slam the door, and lock it funniest fucking thing I have ever seen in my life
My Computer teacher Mr.Gomez was an honest to God Channer. The first thing he taught us was how to "triforce" He explained to us the rules of the internet. While using moodle, his username was Moot. He created pop ups on computers like "System Error: Replace User" He referded to freshman as "Newfags". He told us the story about he contributed a 5 dollar donation on Something Awful to the creation of SWAP.avi. And then encourage everyone else to go watch it. Every once in a while he would send us and email as to what to refure to him that day. Like Captain Insano, Bill S. Preston, Mr. Spock to name a few. And if you didn't, he would not respond to you. One day he taught the entire class...in the third person. And then there is Mr. Brice, History Teacher. One day this kid was on his cell phone. Mr. Brice grabbed the phone out of his hand. Student: What the hell, that my dad on the phone! Mr. Brice: On really? Is the Doug's dad? Yeah, this is Mr. Brice, yeah his history teacher. Listen I hate to break this to you but your son is failing History. I would sugest taking away his computer and video game priviges for a few weeks. Thank have a nice day. *click* Mr. Brice: Sucks to be you. Lucy(annoying girl in my history class he would never accept a grade below an A. Lucy: THAT IS NOT FAIR! I GOT AN A!!!! Mr.Brice: You got an 83. That a B-. You keep debating to me about your grade and I will deduct a point every time you speak. Lucy: You cant do that! Mr.Brice: 82. Lucy: what? Mr.Brice: 81. Lucy: but! Mr.Brice: 80. Lucy: you suck. Mr.Brice: 79. Lucy: you're being mean! Mr brice: 78. What you got? I can go all day baby! I'm just getting warmed up. I will drop your GPA faster than the bullet that killed Kennedy. Student: Mr. Brice, why are all the Kennedy's dead? Mr. Brice. Because God hates them. Assinations, heart failures, plane crashes. God has a vendeda out on the Kennedy's.
my ap gov teacher would openly cuss in class and tell us how awesome it was when most drugs were legal like cocaine and maryj and one time she just yelled from her desk "THERE ARE TO MANY FUCKING LAWS", she also had mascara tattooed on her face so she would never have to apply it again
My 7th grade History teacher had us reenact ancient battles. One time, he brought in a box full of foam swords and just let the class fight each other.
Two or three years back someone came into my school with a knife on the first day of the term and the head of the Tech department pinned him to the wall until the police came. Cool guy.
My old geometry teacher said "Just believe in the heart of the cards" while teaching a lesson. I was the only one who got it :smug:
my old english teacher ended up in porn this is her in action: [url]http://www.google.com/images?hl=en&safe=off&&q=cougar%20amber%20blossom[/url]
My auto-tech teacher last year, Mr. Lloyd, has got to be my favorite teacher. He showed me how to get around school website blocks, let me use his netflix account, and let me take a custom made "gun" into the computer "sciences" class next door and shoot the teacher in the head with a plastic soda bottle with 120 psi behind it. He got suspended this year for a quarter for letting a compressed air tank spin in circles on the ground.
I had a substitute school teacher who yelled whenever he was teaching,.
[QUOTE=Jmir 54;27042557]I had a substitute school teacher who yelled whenever he was teaching,.[/QUOTE] Yeah, well I have a substitute who is named Mr. Kelly, was a Lieutenant in the Army, and looks like Colonel Sanders. He also sleeps during class.
I remember my 7th grade science teacher Mr. Mert was a huge Star Wars nerd he had posters and had a bunch of figures on his desk. He also used a large heavy grey replica of the human brain as a paper weight. I remember at the end of one lesson about chemical reactions he poured rubbing alcohol all over a desk and set it on fire with this "Yay" expression on his face. Later in the year he gave us a project where we had to create a device that would keep an egg from breaking. The first test was dropping it off a small tower on our football field to the ground, the second test was throwing it off the tower, the third test was using his 9 iron slamming it off the tower, and if it somehow survived all of that he would run over it in his jeep. Someone managed to get to the 9 iron and one of the things they used in their protection for the egg was red Jello, was pretty great watching red particles fly everywhere after you're somewhat crazy science teacher hits a box with a 9 iron.
The same teacher Mr. Dodson, he once got a air cannon, (a loooong tube compressed with air, and released to form a air cannon; very fucking powerful), and he put a golf ball into it, and shot it into the hallway, creating a bouncing death ball. He also doesn't have a index finger because his dad cut it off to teach him to use his middle finger for yo-yos.
I've got this pretty awesome Algebra Honors teacher. He's in his mid 60's and rides his bicycle for miles at a time. Besides riding his bicycle, he's also got a motorcycle that he rides around the country every now and then. He also used to brag about his yo-yo tricks. Eventually, he brought it to class and showed everyone how awesome he was with it. He's also going to Haiti to rebuild an orphanage this January.
[QUOTE=Coffee;27001450]Is it just me or do all Maths teachers never admit when they're wrong?[/QUOTE] This teacher had the wrong answers on the quiz, so I failed the test. I corrected her on one of the answers, and so she changes my grade. I'm still failing, so I ask her to check the others but she just throws my paper in the grading bin. At this point, I want to scream, "BITCH I'M ASIAN, YOU THINK I FAILED YOUR MATH TEST?"
[QUOTE=acidcj;26998328]I had this awesome physics teacher: PA: Teachers, please excuse the following announcement... Badass teacher : NO! PA: Will the following students-- And then he ripped the PA box off the wall[/QUOTE] This made me laugh so much I had to recreate it in paint. [IMG]http://i52.tinypic.com/6eq260.jpg[/IMG] I personally had a teacher that had a ps3 and sattelite tv in his classroom. He would just chill and game when we werent there. He was a bastard about homework though.
Mr.B An Economics/Geography/History teacher who jumped off his loft (the room was two stories) onto a student's desk with a saber, completely crushing the table and the students work, and yelled "fall asleep one more time, I dare you."
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