Depression, anxiety, suicidalism and similar disorders, issues and troubles V4 - Discussion, help an - General

It was brown, poster-sized paper that was rolled up and taped to keep it rolled and I'm assuming because it was on some chairs that were somewhat near to the recycling bin - chairs that I usually put stuff on - that someone knocked it down and another person assumed it was something to recycle.

[QUOTE=Pascall;50196339]It was brown, poster-sized paper that was rolled up and taped to keep it rolled and I'm assuming because it was on some chairs that were somewhat near to the recycling bin - chairs that I usually put stuff on - that someone knocked it down and another person assumed it was something to recycle.[/QUOTE] Well, while your situations is more upscaled, you can at least reflect on improvements you'll have to make and reflect on the fact that what you're going to make will probably be better. I've lost countless music projects and have always written something better. I don't often go back to older music to finish them even if they weren't lost, and if I do return to them it always ends up far more changed than what I started with. In other words, you have a chance at getting a new teacher, better understanding ideas the second time around, and creating from the point of view of a slightly more matured Pascall. I always feel like my music is getting better, and if you're the same your art always gets better too.

See the issue is, I can't do the project over. The still-life we had was in class and there's only one class left. The previous one took me about six hours and the class is only about 2 and a half. Even if I did start a new one, I have no supplies left because they got destroyed in my car, no time to probably even complete half of a new project and will likely just be left with a grade that'll tank my GPA. It's not a sort of project that I was in love with or anything but I did need it to keep my GPA from going lower than the 2.6 that it is now.

I am suggesting you will have to take the class over again. Your GPA will be hurt for sure, but it can go back up if you want it to next class.

I could. But I've already been in college for 6 years with no Bachelor's degree to show for it so - The prospect of setback is not a comfort.

[QUOTE=Pascall;50196652]I could. But I've already been in college for 6 years with no Bachelor's degree to show for it so - The prospect of setback is not a comfort.[/QUOTE] I'm in the same boat, but we'll get there.

[QUOTE=Pascall;50196652]I could. But I've already been in college for 6 years with no Bachelor's degree to show for it so - The prospect of setback is not a comfort.[/QUOTE] I'm sorry about your project. I am woefully unprepared for a classroom presentation I'm doing tomorrow. My depression has been getting in the way of me working on it. It's mostly done I'm just going to awkwardly not know what to say. It's not even a graded thing, its a project I did outside of class, so best case scenario it goes well, and worse case I embarrass myself, graduate in a month, and never see these people again. I'm going to try my hardest now to work on it though.

Hey, I wasn't really sure where I should post this, either in the General Adulthood thread in GD, or making a new post in GD or FT, so if this is out of topic then sorry, but I just needed to get some outside input on something that's been weighing on me. I've lived a pretty sheltered life (no drivers license at 18, barely completed permit), and I've just now received my State ID. The thing that's been bothering me is that when we went to fill out the forms, my mom made a fit about checking yes on organ donation. Not once, but twice while we were there - and now that it's come in the mail, she made another fit about it, getting my older sister in on it too. And after consulting some friends, a few echoed the same sentiments. It's not like their arguments were compelling per se ("it's just creepy!", and "the doctors won't try as hard and save you since you're a donor!"), but it's compounded by the fact that my family and their input weighs a lot to me. I've just got a more pragmatic approach/viewpoint at it all I guess. If I'm dead, what good are they to me? If I can save even one other person's life, that'll do me good for a thousand lifetimes. I guess what I'm asking in the end is, how should I respond to their pressure? I can't challenge people very well, so I'm just not sure if I should agree with them and rescind the status or stick to my guns.

borderline personality disorder is not fun

[QUOTE=KillRay;50201574]borderline personality disorder is not fun[/QUOTE] Cognitive behavior therapy is pretty damn helpful for it. Personally I've found that finding an ego helps a shit ton too. Even though my personality are fragmented I've got it to where it all works together. Though I am also on ADHD meds and still have a lot of anger issues but that's due to environment. I've become a massive asshole as well which now I enjoy being a weird freak and just tell people to fuck off if they think I'm being too weird.

Fuckin' shit! I hate falling behind in school. it's like good quality work getting sleep getting work done on time pick two I doesn't help that I only have a half diagnosis for ADD. My former psych believes that there is a strong chance I have it, but due to extraneous circumstances I won't be able to gt a full diagnosis from her. The tools I need are just out of reach.

Guess who just failed another test which was supposed to be easy?

[QUOTE=GoldAssassin;50203847]Guess who just failed another test which was supposed to be easy?[/QUOTE] Your cousin?

I stayed up all night thinking about a lot of things. I should be happy but I'm not. everything is going good right now but I'm still depressed. It's not all day that I'm depressed my mood just changes a lot

[QUOTE=The bird Man;50204194]Your cousin?[/QUOTE] ME

i'm so happy, i'm getting halcion again for my next dental procedure. that stuff is the stuff of dreams

[QUOTE=DELL;50202360]Cognitive behavior therapy is pretty damn helpful for it. Personally I've found that finding an ego helps a shit ton too. Even though my personality are fragmented I've got it to where it all works together. Though I am also on ADHD meds and still have a lot of anger issues but that's due to environment. I've become a massive asshole as well which now I enjoy being a weird freak and just tell people to fuck off if they think I'm being too weird.[/QUOTE] i just got diagnosed with it, and she did recommend dbt. i kinda always knew though. official diagnosis just feels wierd.

So I have court tomorrow for a ticket issued because of a burnt out headlight. I can't even talk to the police without feeling like I have done something horribly wrong, I can only imagine the amount of freezing anxiety I will suffer when I have to stand in front of a judge.

Fuck, my tutor is coming in a few minutes. How am I going to tell him that I've been failing my tests? Out of all the tests, I think I've only scored good in 1 of them, and those are the ones I actually can understand. Fuck me, Why do I keep failing in everything? Unlike other schools, It's very easy to fail this grade and repeat the whole year, in if which that happens, I'm going to fucking kill myself.

For the past several months I've been engrossed by the realization that I'm going to die. Its gone from just a simple fact that I know, to a full blown realization that one day, something will happen, and I will begin dying. I'm not really scared of it, though. But that realization has drastically changed the way I look at life. I've been finding it difficult to muster any enthusiasm towards anything. I realized I was wasting my life at my crappy job, so I quit it. I think I want to go to college now, but I'm consumed by complete apathy. I don't see the point in doing anything anymore because in the end, I'm still going to die, and everything will go away. I can barely make myself do anything, because as soon as I start any activity, I remember that eventually, I'll dead. I've been depressed most of my life. I feel like I've gotten better over the past couple of years though, but this realization seems to have kicked it back into overdrive. None of my hobbies interest me anymore. Nothing seems to call to me. Nothing I do is fun. I feel nothing towards everything. I've grown distant with almost every person I know. And I just don't really care about any of that. I can almost see my life beginning to fall apart, and it doesn't bother me. It should, and I wish it would, so that I would be more motivated. I don't know. I feel like I'm ranting and going in circles and not making a lot of sense. I don't have anybody that I can talk to about any of this, and I feel the need to put it out there. At least somebody will know. I don't know where my life goes from here, and I'm scared and alone.

I fucked up again..

[QUOTE=KillRay;50209804]i just got diagnosed with it, and she did recommend dbt. i kinda always knew though. official diagnosis just feels wierd.[/QUOTE] Well the good news is with a whole lot of work you can pretty much get rid of it. Though I went all psychonaut at it which isn't the best idea as the medical research on it is quite lacking. Hopefully you too figure out something that will make you yourself. As well as the ADHD getting dealt with helped a lot in at the final end of tying up all the things inside my head.

[QUOTE=GoldAssassin;50211659]Fuck, my tutor is coming in a few minutes. How am I going to tell him that I've been failing my tests? Out of all the tests, I think I've only scored good in 1 of them, and those are the ones I actually can understand. Fuck me, Why do I keep failing in everything? Unlike other schools, It's very easy to fail this grade and repeat the whole year, in if which that happens, I'm going to fucking kill myself.[/QUOTE] It makes me angry beyond belief when someone says they will consider suicide over a test.....

not really sure whats up, but feeling surprisingly depressed. I feel lonely I think? sure, I do have one friend around but I feel like I need variety? I'm not really who I want to be either. I feel so incredibly dull and boring to be around. bad at conversations. yeah I don't know what to do really.

(She is 14 and in grade 8) My little sister has been thinking of killing her self/has been cutting herself for quite some time now. We've taken her to the counsellers, got her anti depression meds, put her in a sport, and tried to move her away from the bad crowd she seems to be hanging around with. Tonight I just heard that my mom was telling the counseller about how everything seems to be going a lot better with her, and she (sister) started bawling her eyes out saying she thought about killing herself again. Everything seems to be going a lot better but in spite of that she still thinks about killing herself. We have no idea what to think, I talked with my dad and the concept of killing yourself is just so forign that we dont know where to begin. We try, but what do you do? I think its the crowd she hangs with, they're all from broken homes and disfunctional families, they romanticize suicide and I think they encourage/facilitate my sisters behavior. My sister is awesome to talk to, funny, its just the way she dresses and the crowd she hangs out with doesn't let her really show this. We're trying to steer her to good kids. I dont know...

I just want to give up on living. I fucking hope that I dont wake up one day. I'm failing 11th grade so I'm probably going to have to repeat it, my parents hate me and think I'm an idiot, and I've been raped I'm probably just going to kill myself later this week. I have nothing to live for.

[QUOTE=Shaohs;50216338]I just want to give up on living. I fucking hope that I dont wake up one day. I'm failing 11th grade so I'm probably going to have to repeat it, my parents hate me and think I'm an idiot, and I've been raped I'm probably just going to kill myself later this week. I have nothing to live for.[/QUOTE] Highschool is a big pool of drama, you've got only one more year of it before you're free! Whats one year in the grand scheme of things? Then you're free to go off into the world, no more daily grinds with assholes picking on you or whatever the situation may be. I was never good at school either, I just skimmed by, it wasn't my thing, now that I'm graduated there's so much more to do, and much better people to meet. Why off yourself when your whole life has been in one location, theres a whole world out there! Maybe set a bucket list of things you want to do/experience and places you want to go, make that your goal in life. Finish that list. By the time its done, maybe you'll actually want to write more things down... extend it a bit! I rememher an old story, there was a man who was going to kill himself so he went down to mexico and banged hookers and did a lot of drugs, at the end of it he decided life was much too fun to leave now! What I'm kinda getting at is shrug off all those bad feelings the best you can, and hold on out a little longer!! (I'm trying the best I can here!) If you'd want to take a different approach... lets start with what do you like about yourself? What do you like to do! [editline]27th April 2016[/editline] [QUOTE=PredGD;50215841]not really sure whats up, but feeling surprisingly depressed. I feel lonely I think? sure, I do have one friend around but I feel like I need variety? I'm not really who I want to be either. I feel so incredibly dull and boring to be around. bad at conversations. yeah I don't know what to do really.[/QUOTE] Do you have any things you like to do or hobbies? See if you can find a local group of people who do the same thing, theres talking for the purpos of talking which you may be bad at, and the there is talking about something you're passionate about. Chances are you'd be really good at that, and through speaking about what you love and listening to others it may help you in general socializing

People have said that leaving me to bottle stuff up is like watching me kill myself, then again if i wanted to kill myself then i would have done it already. Forcing me into a corner and asking to spill my guts when i am bound so tight isn't going to make me want to say anything. As if what i feel or think is worthy of even contemplation. It hardly matters. It's as if people think there is an underlying superficial problem behind all of my behaviour and they can't understand that maybe that maybe things have taken it's toll already. 3 years, 5, years, 8 years too late. I don't know what people are trying to convince me to do even, like if i had even a single clue what the problem with me is and i've been to places for it. It still doesn't change how things are, i have to live like this for the rest of my life. Knowing. And i can't just off myself knowing that they'll be people like my family who will miss me, people who have sunk years and years and years of their lives into caring for me and teaching me. It's the one thing that has stopped me, everytime. From self harming, From even contemplating it. It still feels like torture on some days though, knowing. It hardly matters, whatever. Sorry.

[QUOTE=Daysofwinter;50215445]It makes me angry beyond belief when someone says they will consider suicide over a test.....[/QUOTE] Not just over a single test, but over my overall grades. Like I said, it's easy as hell to fail a grade here and repeat the whole year. That shit would affect your report, less likely to get you a job, and all that shit. You see your old friends in a higher grade looking down at you and your new classmates thinking how much of a failure you are, and your parents get very angry and take away everything you think is fun and distracting.

[QUOTE=Anti Christ;50211703]For the past several months I've been engrossed by the realization that I'm going to die. Its gone from just a simple fact that I know, to a full blown realization that one day, something will happen, and I will begin dying. I'm not really scared of it, though. But that realization has drastically changed the way I look at life. I've been finding it difficult to muster any enthusiasm towards anything. I realized I was wasting my life at my crappy job, so I quit it. I think I want to go to college now, but I'm consumed by complete apathy. I don't see the point in doing anything anymore because in the end, I'm still going to die, and everything will go away. I can barely make myself do anything, because as soon as I start any activity, I remember that eventually, I'll dead. I've been depressed most of my life. I feel like I've gotten better over the past couple of years though, but this realization seems to have kicked it back into overdrive. None of my hobbies interest me anymore. Nothing seems to call to me. Nothing I do is fun. I feel nothing towards everything. I've grown distant with almost every person I know. And I just don't really care about any of that. I can almost see my life beginning to fall apart, and it doesn't bother me. It should, and I wish it would, so that I would be more motivated. I don't know. I feel like I'm ranting and going in circles and not making a lot of sense. I don't have anybody that I can talk to about any of this, and I feel the need to put it out there. At least somebody will know. I don't know where my life goes from here, and I'm scared and alone.[/QUOTE] You can add me on Steam if you like. I used to be very afraid and it took me along while to be comfortable with it. Now it's the entire baseline for my life.