• Daily Life V3 - Shit Nobody Cares About Edition
    10,311 replies, posted
So I've been taking 38mg of concerta, and moved up to 54mg today. Also for the past one and a half months my parents have been trying to "make up" after my fucked up dad cheated on my mom and started drinking again. The summer was two-thirds over when we found out about the affair. I was on 38mg of concerta at the time (to deal with my aspergers and ADHD), and apparently that mixed with the cocktail of stress juices released at the time made me hallucinate like all hell. I saw strange black spider-like things move in sickening patterns across the walls, either heard a soft sort of whimpering sound or a fucked up moaning cry. Also whenever I was in a dark room i'd see this asshole [img]http://shocktillyoudrop.com/nextraimages/Bedfellows.jpg[/img] [b]FUCK OFF[/b] I'm not going to lie, I broke down and cried because I thought I was going insane (too much Lovecraft imo). It took me a while to realize it wasn't real, because my perception of reality was school fed up the bone bulge. This went on for two days because I knew they were hallucinations. Most of the shit I saw was something from a scary movie or whatever, so in my masterful Vulcan nature I thought I would get used to it eventually. Mind over matter(mind?). [h2]THAT DIDN'T FUCKING WORK[/h2] I went with it for 5 days before I realized that wouldn't do shit. So I told my parents I wouldn't take that shit anymore, and after some hassle I got my way. Two weeks later my dad guilt his way back inside the family, and my sister moved to college a week or so later (only sane person in the house). For the next three weeks (total of six weeks and five days since I got off the durgs), my dad fucked something up somehow and fucked up everyone's shit. I never trusted people beforehand, and because I was born with a fucked up body I came to the conclusion of there being on god, in any way, shape, or form, when I was around 9. This philosophy helped like you wouldn't believe. Even though it was still the summer I got four hours of sleep on average due to familial shit, my friends being dicks, bitches being bitches, and medical shit. After those three weeks were up, I had one week to buy all my school supplies. I didn't really give a fuck because I could get out of the house. Shit seemed to be getting better between my mom and dad, I felt it might actually work, despite how much I wanted to detach myself from the whole situation. I started to talk to both my parents about what was happening. My sis and I always thought dad had ADHD, but like me he refused to take the label. And I've been diagnosed with everything fucking possible (assburgers), and I had my left teste surgically removed. Most of my life was spent either in a hospital, in physical therapy, or at a psychiatrists office. Even I didn't want to be diagnosed with that because of society's stigma of ADHD. Someone who has ignored it for fifty years isn't going to accept it. He did though, and he really listened to me. I told him my perception of the situation and he was shocked. I guess he needed to hear it from his son's point of view to realize how bad it was. I explained how this kind of thing happens all the time (just look at the fucking divorce rate), and ADHD is really common. I had to get it from someone, right? After my parents had a discussion, a discussion that has a tendency to become a shouting match where shit gets broken. After an hour of pointless blaming, my dad left on a trip to san diego (he goes on business trips every other week, he's gone for 1 to 3 days usually). I decided to get more involved for some reason (I thought I could help), so I went upstairs to find my mother crying that kind of defeated, whimpering cry. Being the stone man I am, I tried to comfort her as best I could. Eventually I told her I talked to dad about him maybe having ADHD and saying he'll get evaluated and will take meds if given them. She was thrilled, apparently she shared my belief in the possibility of him having ADHD. Things were actually looking up. Involving myself in this had taken a toll on my academics, I had an F in Biotech, math, english, a C in history, and an A in an upper level art class because I draw anyway. I told my mom this and instead of getting pissed (well she got a little pissed) she recommended I get back on the concerta. Me, believing the hallucinations were caused due to the high dosage and the initial anxiety of the situation, agreed. I started out on 16mg, to ease my way into it. My grades improved a bit over the course of two and a half weeks, i was routinely taking the role of the intermediary if some shit happened between my parents. I got mood swings pretty often, but we thought htat was because of the medicine. Things were actually looking good. I started to believe shit would work out. They would say they loved each other, and they started to do more recreational things together, to work things out peacefully. I focused on my academics and got fair grades. I moved up to 38mg and went with that for a week. Things were looking a lot better. Only recently have I noticed how yhings have affected my physical apperence. I ate only one meal a day, got five hours of sleep a night, and was either working or dealing with my batshit parents. My eyes are a bit sunken in. I have big black circles around my eyes. My tendonitus has been getting progressively worse. I looked in the mirror a while ago and it looks like I lost 30 something pounds. I look like fucking christian bale in the machinist. I am not exaggerating Two days ago they got into another big fight. My dad kept assuring me this was part of the healing process. Things have to be sorted out like this. I believed him. Today was when shit hit the fan. I'm not sure what my dad did but he fucked up big. I moved up to a larger dose of 54mg. The hallucinations came back. [img]http://shocktillyoudrop.com/nextraimages/Bedfellows.jpg[/img] [b]GOD DAMMIT[/b] My intestines fucking froze up, i had the worst fucking migraine I've ever gotten, my tendonitus got so bad I couldn't write. I had no idea what the fuck was going on. Like a cunt i decided to muscle through it. Not tell my parents, they had enough problems. I don't remember, but I said something that set my mom off. She threw some shit against the wall, yelled at me about the same incoherent shit over and over again and I just wanted to be alone. The drugs started to wear off (it was four hours since my last dose) and I got a grip on the situation. I would simply agree and try not to make things worse. Neither of us were in our right minds. After screaming at me and taking my xbox and phone away, she stopped and I just agreed and left. Fuck this shit. They're getting a divorce as I type this. I've still got some concerta in my system so this post probably isn't coherent at all. The hallucinations came back about five minutes ago and I'm crying for some reason. Once I calm down and regain sanity I'mgoing to find out what happened. shit nigga wall o text
I've taken concerta before, hate the stuff; makes me feel nauseous as hell and wanna ball up in the corner of my room also wtf is this shit, 6sh92 vest is sold out EVERYWHERE on sites I know but the moment I look up google translated Russian Sites: [img]http://img571.imageshack.us/img571/8233/srslythisisbull.png[/img]
fitting song [media]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DzD1O7zZryM&feature=channel_video_title[/media]
the fuck Russia sites, y u no have US market
[QUOTE=Kill001;32035121]I've taken concerta before, hate the stuff; makes me feel nauseous as hell and wanna ball up in the corner of my room also wtf is this shit, 6sh92 vest is sold out EVERYWHERE on sites I know but the moment I look up google translated Russian Sites: [img]http://img571.imageshack.us/img571/8233/srslythisisbull.png[/img][/QUOTE] what the fuck i thought they discontinued the ruble
Well I'm pretty sure I've never really heard of any other form of currency Russia uses so... I'm may buy the 6sh92 from that weird Russian site anyone want me to be bait?
[QUOTE=Tark;32034950]i'm actually getting that from a few people and yeah, it's surprising me[/QUOTE] Lots of people in the closet.
Fuck, anyone here know Russian? I'll gladly send money through paypal if you order from this site to my address.... [editline]31st August 2011[/editline] [url]http://www.kalibr603.ru/shop/UID_1394.html[/url]
[QUOTE=Big Orca;32035131]what the fuck i thought they discontinued the ruble[/QUOTE] Nah, i remember when i ordered my ushanka from a place outside moscow they sent in some rubles for the foreign factor. Was neat.
[QUOTE=Kill001;32035014]Interesting.... Zeta Lab is making an AS VAL and SV98: [url]http://koko13121.militaryblog.jp/[/url] too fucking bad it's the same company that makes $1000 nuggets [editline]31st August 2011[/editline] They're working with ares to make it apparantly: [img]http://www.militaryblog.jp/usr/koko13121/long-range-1.jpg[/img][/QUOTE] Not sure if excited or not. Never found out how their gold trimmed mosin nagant performed, but yeah given their price tag and ARES' complete lack of quality control this could be very bad.
[QUOTE=Kill001;32035014]Interesting.... Zeta Lab is making an AS VAL and SV98: [url]http://koko13121.militaryblog.jp/[/url] too fucking bad it's the same company that makes $1000 nuggets [editline]31st August 2011[/editline] They're working with ares to make it apparantly: [img]http://www.militaryblog.jp/usr/koko13121/long-range-1.jpg[/img][/QUOTE] Zeta Labs was the guys who made $300 Mosins, not the $1000 ones.
Steam works on my computer again. It was ridiculous why it was broken in the first place...
Steam is too much of a pain in my ass. I gave up on it, it always gives some stupid rare error.
[QUOTE=Kman1;32041546]Steam is too much of a pain in my ass. I gave up on it, it always gives some stupid rare error.[/QUOTE] The problem with mine was this: Almost all Asus laptops come with some Creative Audio Suite software installed. This means that there's not one, but two sound drivers installed. So every time I'd start Steam, it would lock up and freeze my entire computer. Did some research and I found out that everyone who uninstalled that software, had no problems running Steam again. So in essence, something completely unrelated to Steam, broke Steam.
Yeah, that's what happens with me. Steam has too many negative interactions on my computer that cause it to crash.
At least I can play Killing Floor again. The only thing that sucks is that I use my cell phone's internet connection to play, which means I lag a lot. [editline]31st August 2011[/editline] Also, I need a good war playlist. Something to get amped to. Any suggestions? [editline]31st August 2011[/editline] Also, found a new font I have fallen in love with. [IMG]http://i223.photobucket.com/albums/dd134/CPTYLER/Facepunchair.png[/IMG]
My AP lang class just completely pissed me off today. Some girl told me that Muslims don't belong in America and that Christianity = morals and that separating church and state would remove all morals from the country.
[QUOTE=Dark Descent;32044413]My AP lang class just completely pissed me off today. Some girl told me that Muslims don't belong in America and that Christianity = morals and that separating church and state would remove all morals from the country.[/QUOTE] Today, I overheard a girl in my physical science class discussing the fact that everything Bush did was %100 justified, no matter what, and after the person she was talking with said he respected her opinion, but did not share it, she snapped, nearly slapped him, and started yelling that she knew more than him because her father was a soldier. :smithicide:
[QUOTE=Psycoace2;32044542]Today, I overheard a girl in my physical science class discussing the fact that everything Bush did was %100 justified, no matter what, and after the person she was talking with said he respected her opinion, but did not share it, she snapped, nearly slapped him, and started yelling that she knew more than him because her father was a soldier. :smithicide:[/QUOTE] and that's why i stopped arguing about politics you never make any friends, your opponent never changes their view, and most of the time you're talking out of your ass.
[QUOTE=Big Orca;32044851]and that's why i stopped arguing about politics you never make any friends, your opponent never changes their view, and most of the time you're talking out of your ass.[/QUOTE] I'm the same way. Doesn't mean I can't eavesdrop. :v:
[QUOTE=Psycoace2;32044542]Today, I overheard a girl in my physical science class discussing the fact that everything Bush did was %100 justified, no matter what, and after the person she was talking with said he respected her opinion, but did not share it, she snapped, nearly slapped him, and started yelling that she knew more than him because her father was a soldier. :smithicide:[/QUOTE] i find it pitiful that some of amurika's youth gets dumber each day
Dark, tell her I'm kicking her ass. And Fish, what was that band you showed me a while back?
Anddddd I can no longer airsoft, hang out with my junior/senior friends, or see my girlfriend. Apparently it contributes to my "attitude problem". I'm a 95+ student, perfect conduct, but just because I haven't been too happy the past few days, my mom thinks I'm changing. This is totally gonna help...
Believe me, you could snap the bitch over your knee. She's a dumb close-minded selfish bitch and I hate that I have to basically cover for her in band too since she can't play tuba worth a damn. I want her to go back to clarinet.
Nevermind Fish, it was Deer Tick.
[QUOTE=Psycoace2;32044947]I'm the same way. Doesn't mean I can't eavesdrop. :v:[/QUOTE] I only argue about civil rights and easy shit like that.
I'm extremely political. Hence, I'm taking AP Gov/Politics.
I'm probably going to take that my senior year since I already took the usual senior history class, AP European History.
I never argue, I present a neutral point of view and if someone is extremely stupid about something, I take their opinions into consideration and then I present opposing facts and information and see how they react if they start making personal attacks then my job is done :v:
Most people at my school, well, at least in the Health Sciences Academy, take AP Euro or Human Sophomore year, AP US History Junior Year, and AP Gov/Politics Senior year.
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