[QUOTE=Bacongrave;23615073]I'm working for an estate agent and my co worker (from the employment agency) goes to the toilet everyday after his lunch break. I've already spoken to him about it, but he says its a basic need and I don't know what to do. Allegedly he often has flatulences, so he told me. :mad:
Can he really go to the shitter for 2 hours every day? Of course he is paid by the hour. I need him, otherwise all the work sticks to me.
Just wanna make him understand that it can't be like this.[/QUOTE]
I think you'll find he's sleeping.
[QUOTE=Bacongrave;23615270]Then he tells me how its not his fault that he has diarrhea.[/QUOTE]
Oh boo fucking hooo.
Fuck him them! Tell him to fuck off and quit, if you're having to do his stupid work because he has to take a shit everyday! Who cares about him, just tell you're boss!
If he shits at the exact same time everyday, obviously something is happening. Either he has medical problems, is wanking, or is sleeping. Confront him about it, but try to be more serious and egg the conversation on.
Tell him to go to the doctor and come back with a fucking reason why he has to sit in the fucking toilet for 2 hours.
Tell him to quit being such a [I]shitty[/I] employee.
but seriously, you should play a prank on him or something.
Punch him in the guts. If he really is taking a 2-hour shit daily, his large intestine may rupture and kill him, causing him to vomit and void his bowls with a combination of both blood and stool.
sounds like you've got yourself in a [I][B]stinky[/B][/I] situation
:haw:
How do you have 2 hours of diarrhea for a month and live?
Maybe he's smoking? Drugs?
[QUOTE=magicalKC;23617235]I think I found this on urban dictionary once. It was the definition for some word. "having your dick sucked while shitting." Can't remember the word though.[/QUOTE]
I think its called a "Blumpkin"
[QUOTE=CoolCorky;23615554]Go in there and make sure it's really quiet, so the only sound you hear is the "plop plop plop" of him taking a shit.
Then let out a war cry and throw yourself against the stall door like "RAAAAAAAAARGH *THUD*" and that will be sure to get him out (you probably won't win any points with the janitor though).[/QUOTE]
Fuckin' charge'n'targe Demos.
He's your co worker, cover him. I assume you're not working at a nuclear facility so there's nothing to be worried about - your boss will probably notice you're working harder and promote you*
[spoiler]*highly unlikely that your boss gives a shit, about you or your shitty shitting coworker[/spoiler]
Call from an external line and pretend to be the maintenance crew. Say that his shit is backing up the line and if it takes any more of your time you are going to talk to him personally. Do so with an accent.
[QUOTE=Metalcastr;23655199]Call from an external line and pretend to be the maintenance crew. Say that his shit is backing up the line and if it takes any more of your time you are going to talk to him personally. Do so with an accent.[/QUOTE]
What will that solve?
I used to work with a guy like this. He'd conveniently go into the washroom any time he knew some work was coming our way and he'd be in there for 20 minutes or more. Then he'd criticize me if I took more than five minutes.
[QUOTE=AlexT;23655261]What will that solve?[/QUOTE]
It will atleast get him off of his shitting ass.
[QUOTE=Grabigel;23655388]It will atleast get him off of his shitting ass.[/QUOTE]
If I need to take a crap, I won't let some maintenance guy with an accent stop me. What kind of a punishment is him just talking to him anyway?
Reverse gravity so he shits on himself for 2 hours
Who wants to guess how long it will take for MAX STEEL to post here?
Nevermind MAX STEEL is banned.
[QUOTE=devon_wargod;23687055]Who wants to guess how long it will take for MAX STEEL to post here?[/QUOTE]
He's permabanned so I'm going to guess "all eternity". At least, under that specific alias, that is.
Your coworker is either sleeping or having a really good wank. Good for him. If you tell your boss then you're essentially cockblocking his hand, and we all know what cockblockers are. :jerkbag:
[QUOTE=ZuXer;23620077]Well he is your COWorker, what do you except?[/QUOTE]
This begs the question: Will he be blown to smitheroons?
AGH AUTOMERGE BREAKING FAGGOTS
He's not shitting, he's jerking off
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