• The SCP Foundation - "Send in the D-Class!"
    5,411 replies, posted
maybe you breath the tatoo in and it imprints itself on the insides of your lungs not sure what it would do after that but it's probably something to do with exploding airbags
[QUOTE=Zombii;36049248][url]http://www.scp-wiki.net/scp-even-number-j[/url] This is incredible:[/QUOTE] [quote]Description: SCP-9-J is a Horny Snake. Like most members of its species, it is able to Burn paper, and regularly eats twice its own weight in Pasta each day.[/quote] [quote]In addition, many researchers feel it has an uncanny resemblance to Cillian Murphy. Whether or not this is at all related to SCP-9-J's anomalous properties is unknown at this time. Recovery Log: SCP-9-J was first located in Shatnersville where the Rams were using it in order to Fuck every woman in the world. Thankfully, Mobile Task Force Lambda-7 (''Community'') was able to recover the object with only 2931 civilian casualties.[/quote] hee
[QUOTE=Zombii;36049248]http://www.scp-wiki.net/scp-even-number-j [/QUOTE] I think i broke it... [Quote]CLASSIFIED BY ORDER OF O5-█ Item #: SCP-5891-J Object Class: A Special Containment Procedures: SCP-5891-J is to be kept in a Burritos -lined containment chamber located in Area 51, where it is to be guarded at all times by no less than 3 Shopkeepers armed with Light bulbs . In the event that SCP-5891-J ever begins Crying its Arm, Jeremy Klarkson is to Cringe SCP-5891-J until it ceases its behavior. In the event of a containment breach, Mobile Task Force kʰ-7 (''Family guy'') is to be dispatched to SCP-5891-J's last known location. Description: SCP-5891-J is a Creepy Elephant. Like most members of its species, it is able to Shunning oak, and regularly eats twice its own weight in Burritos each day. SCP-5891-J's unusual properties manifest whenever it comes in contact with Pussy, which causes it to turn into Politics. Whenever this happens, all Assasins within a 8 kilometer radius will begin to Laugh uncontrollably, usually leading to civilian casualties. In addition, many researchers feel it has an uncanny resemblance to Christopher Hitchens. Whether or not this is at all related to SCP-5891-J's anomalous properties is unknown at this time. Recovery Log: SCP-5891-J was first located in Karlsburg where the Buffalo Bills were using it in order to Inflate all balloons in the world. Thankfully, Mobile Task Force kʰ-7 (''Family guy'') was able to recover the object with only 861000 civilian casualties. Addendum: Test Log 5891-1 Dr. Marx: Ello? Ello? Is zhis thing on? Ach, good. Zhis is Docktorr Marx, and I am about to test SCP-5891's reaction to Cat. Are you ready to proceed, Docktorr Branislav? Dr. Branislav: Yes sir, ready to begin test. Dr. Marx: Excellent! I am now introducing the Cat to 5891... hmm, zhe subject seems to have already figured out zhe test material. Dr. Branislav: Making a note; 'subject shows high capacity for learning'. Marx: Now zhe subject is lookink right at me, almost as if it... MINE GOTT! MINE Torso! IT'S GOT MINE Torso! OH ZHE AGONY! ZHE AGONEEEEEEEEEEEEY! END LOG In light of incident 5891-J-1[/quote]
Haha, oh my. This is incredible. CLASSIFIED BY ORDER OF O5-█ Item #: SCP-043-J Object Class: Euclid Special Containment Procedures: SCP-043-J is to be kept in a corndog-lined containment chamber located in Chernobyl, where it is to be guarded at all times by no less than 4 musicians armed with pencils. In the event that SCP-043-J ever begins fucking its leg, Dr. Agatha Rights is to punch SCP-043-J until it ceases its behavior. In the event of a containment breach, Mobile Task Force Beta-7 (''Doctor Who'') is to be dispatched to SCP-043-J's last known location. Description: SCP-043-J is a speedy iguana. Like most members of its species, it is able to transform into a turtle, and regularly eats twice its own weight in corndog each day. SCP-043-J's unusual properties manifest whenever it comes in contact with drivers, which causes it to turn into Justin Bieber. Whenever this happens, all planets within a 4,000,000,000,000,000 kilometer radius will begin to burn uncontrollably, usually leading to civilian casualties. In addition, many researchers feel it has an uncanny resemblance to Stevie Wonder. Whether or not this is at all related to SCP-043-J's anomalous properties is unknown at this time. Recovery Log: SCP-043-J was first located in Tardville where the Philadelphia Eagles were using it in order to destroy all post-it's ever made.. Thankfully, Mobile Task Force Beta-7 (''Doctor Who'') was able to recover the object with only 2973 civilian casualties. Addendum: Test Log 043-1 Dr. Spreinschtager: Ello? Ello? Is zhis thing on? Ach, good. Zhis is Docktorr Spreinschtager, and I am about to test SCP-043's reaction to microphone. Are you ready to proceed, Docktorr Ofir? Dr. Ofir: Yes sir, ready to begin test. Dr. Spreinschtager: Excellent! I am now introducing the microphone to 043... hmm, zhe subject seems to have already figured out zhe test material. Dr. Ofir: Making a note; 'subject shows high capacity for learning'. Spreinschtager: Now zhe subject is lookink right at me, almost as if it... MEIN GOTT! MEIN BUTT! IT'S GOT MEIN BUTT! OH ZHE AGONY! ZHE AGONEEEEEEEEEEEEY! END LOG In light of incident 043-J-1, testing has been suspended indefinitely. - O5-█
[quote]Item #: SCP-63-J Object Class: Totally safe Special Containment Procedures: SCP-63-J is to be kept in a grapes-lined containment chamber located in a shack, where it is to be guarded at all times by no less than 1,01 shopkeepers armed with cardboard boxes. In the event that SCP-63-J ever begins holding its toe, senior staff member is to pet SCP-63-J until it ceases its behavior. In the event of a containment breach, Mobile Task Force µ-7 (''I don't watch TV'') is to be dispatched to SCP-63-J's last known location. Description: SCP-63-J is a polite moose. Like most members of its species, it is able to abuse angry people, and regularly eats twice its own weight in grapes each day. SCP-63-J's unusual properties manifest whenever it comes in contact with boxes, which causes it to turn into a cow. Whenever this happens, all drums within a 64 kilometer radius will begin to love uncontrollably, usually leading to civilian casualties. In addition, many researchers feel it has an uncanny resemblance to Bill Gates. Whether or not this is at all related to SCP-63-J's anomalous properties is unknown at this time. Recovery Log: SCP-63-J was first located in Birkenberg where the I don't like sports were using it in order to combust into stardust. Thankfully, Mobile Task Force µ-7 (''I don't watch TV'') was able to recover the object with only 32 civilian casualties. Addendum: Test Log 63-1 Dr. Germanson: Ello? Ello? Is zhis thing on? Ach, good. Zhis is Docktorr Germanson, and I am about to test SCP-63's reaction to grapefruit. Are you ready to proceed, Docktorr Doctorson? Dr. Doctorson: Yes sir, ready to begin test. Dr. Germanson: Excellent! I am now introducing the grapefruit to 63... hmm, zhe subject seems to have already figured out zhe test material. Dr. Doctorson: Making a note; 'subject shows high capacity for learning'. Germanson: Now zhe subject is lookink right at me, almost as if it... MEIN GOTT! MEIN finger! IT'S GOT MEIN finger! OH ZHE AGONY! ZHE AGONEEEEEEEEEEEEY! END LOG In light of incident 63-J-1, testing has been suspended indefinitely. - O5-█[/quote] Here's what I got out of it.
[QUOTE=Krinkels;36031390][img]http://25.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_m2nqyfz3S11r8uumzo1_500.jpg[/img] Here it is.[/QUOTE] That picture never fails to creep the SHIT out of me.
[QUOTE=JLim;36054396]That picture never fails to creep the SHIT out of me.[/QUOTE] Why? I don't really see anything wrong with it. And I'm not trying to sound like some "badass" or anything, I just legitimately don't see anything creepy about it and want to understand.
[QUOTE=Tagger;36055854]Why? I don't really see anything wrong with it. And I'm not trying to sound like some "badass" or anything, I just legitimately don't see anything creepy about it and want to understand.[/QUOTE] That's bone cancer. In your skull. That means those spikes actually grow from the skull and tear into your skin. And judging from the picture, maybe even your eyeballs or the brain. And, yes, it's a real thing. Feel free to cringe all you like now.
[url]http://www.scp-wiki.net/scp-682-j[/url] what is this
[QUOTE=Jellyman;36055955][url]http://www.scp-wiki.net/scp-682-j[/url] what is this[/QUOTE] A joke pointing out how silly SCP-682 is.
CLASSIFIED BY ORDER OF O5-█ Item #: SCP-3-J Object Class: Pretty Fuckin' Keter Special Containment Procedures: SCP-3-J is to be kept in a booty juice-lined containment chamber located in Fort Knox, where it is to be guarded at all times by no less than 5 Whores armed with toothpicks. In the event that SCP-3-J ever begins galloping its lungs, =)DANK(= xXx420_Blunt_SmokaxXx [luv2jiz] is to jack off SCP-3-J until it ceases its behavior. In the event of a containment breach, Mobile Task Force Phi-7 (''American Pickers'') is to be dispatched to SCP-3-J's last known location. Description: SCP-3-J is a horny moray eel. Like most members of its species, it is able to smoke blunts, and regularly eats twice its own weight in booty juice each day. SCP-3-J's unusual properties manifest whenever it comes in contact with horses, which causes it to turn into dog. Whenever this happens, all Transformers within a 4 kilometer radius will begin to screw uncontrollably, usually leading to civilian casualties. In addition, many researchers feel it has an uncanny resemblance to Lupin III. Whether or not this is at all related to SCP-3-J's anomalous properties is unknown at this time. Recovery Log: SCP-3-J was first located in Snoresville where the New York Nicks were using it in order to become the STRONGest man in the world. Thankfully, Mobile Task Force Phi-7 (''American Pickers'') was able to recover the object with only 34,355,2345 civilian casualties. Addendum: Test Log 3-1 Dr. Heilburger: Ello? Ello? Is zhis thing on? Ach, good. Zhis is Docktorr Heilburger, and I am about to test SCP-3's reaction to turdbasket. Are you ready to proceed, Docktorr Epps? Dr. Epps: Yes sir, ready to begin test. Dr. Heilburger: Excellent! I am now introducing the turdbasket to 3... hmm, zhe subject seems to have already figured out zhe test material. Dr. Epps: Making a note; 'subject shows high capacity for learning'. Heilburger: Now zhe subject is lookink right at me, almost as if it... MEIN GOTT! MEIN cloaca ! IT'S GOT MEIN cloaca ! OH ZHE AGONY! ZHE AGONEEEEEEEEEEEEY! END LOG In light of incident 3-J-1, testing has been suspended indefinitely. - O5-█ uh
[IMG]http://puu.sh/wbPe[/IMG] PFFT
[QUOTE=Zombii;36049248][url]http://www.scp-wiki.net/scp-even-number-j[/url] This is incredible:[/QUOTE] CLASSIFIED BY ORDER OF O5-█ Item #: SCP-Jesus-J Object Class: Jesus Special Containment Procedures: SCP-Jesus-J is to be kept in a Jesus-lined containment chamber located in Jesus, where it is to be guarded at all times by no less than Jesus Jesus armed with Jesus. In the event that SCP-Jesus-J ever begins Jesus its Jesus, Jesus is to Jesus SCP-Jesus-J until it ceases its behavior. In the event of a containment breach, Mobile Task Force Jesus-7 (''Jesus'') is to be dispatched to SCP-Jesus-J's last known location. Description: SCP-Jesus-J is a Jesus Jesus. Like most members of its species, it is able to Jesus, and regularly eats twice its own weight in Jesus each day. SCP-Jesus-J's unusual properties manifest whenever it comes in contact with Jesus, which causes it to turn into Jesus. Whenever this happens, all Jesus within a Jesus kilometer radius will begin to Jesus uncontrollably, usually leading to civilian casualties. In addition, many researchers feel it has an uncanny resemblance to Jesus. Whether or not this is at all related to SCP-Jesus-J's anomalous properties is unknown at this time. Recovery Log: SCP-Jesus-J was first located in Jesus where the Jesus were using it in order to Jesus. Thankfully, Mobile Task Force Jesus-7 (''Jesus'') was able to recover the object with only Jesus civilian casualties. Addendum: Test Log Jesus-1 Dr. Jesus: Ello? Ello? Is zhis thing on? Ach, good. Zhis is Docktorr Jesus, and I am about to test SCP-Jesus's reaction to Jesus. Are you ready to proceed, Docktorr Jesus? Dr. Jesus: Yes sir, ready to begin test. Dr. Jesus: Excellent! I am now introducing the Jesus to Jesus... hmm, zhe subject seems to have already figured out zhe test material. Dr. Jesus: Making a note; 'subject shows high capacity for learning'. Jesus: Now zhe subject is lookink right at me, almost as if it... MEIN GOTT! MEIN Jesus! IT'S GOT MEIN Jesus! OH ZHE AGONY! ZHE AGONEEEEEEEEEEEEY! END LOG In light of incident Jesus-J-1, testing has been suspended indefinitely. - O5-█
[QUOTE=Griffster26;36056528]CLASSIFIED BY ORDER OF O5-█ Item #: SCP-Jesus-J Object Class: Jesus Special Containment Procedures: SCP-Jesus-J is to be kept in a Jesus-lined containment chamber located in Jesus, where it is to be guarded at all times by no less than Jesus Jesus armed with Jesus. In the event that SCP-Jesus-J ever begins Jesus its Jesus, Jesus is to Jesus SCP-Jesus-J until it ceases its behavior. In the event of a containment breach, Mobile Task Force Jesus-7 (''Jesus'') is to be dispatched to SCP-Jesus-J's last known location. Description: SCP-Jesus-J is a Jesus Jesus. Like most members of its species, it is able to Jesus, and regularly eats twice its own weight in Jesus each day. SCP-Jesus-J's unusual properties manifest whenever it comes in contact with Jesus, which causes it to turn into Jesus. Whenever this happens, all Jesus within a Jesus kilometer radius will begin to Jesus uncontrollably, usually leading to civilian casualties. In addition, many researchers feel it has an uncanny resemblance to Jesus. Whether or not this is at all related to SCP-Jesus-J's anomalous properties is unknown at this time. Recovery Log: SCP-Jesus-J was first located in Jesus where the Jesus were using it in order to Jesus. Thankfully, Mobile Task Force Jesus-7 (''Jesus'') was able to recover the object with only Jesus civilian casualties. Addendum: Test Log Jesus-1 Dr. Jesus: Ello? Ello? Is zhis thing on? Ach, good. Zhis is Docktorr Jesus, and I am about to test SCP-Jesus's reaction to Jesus. Are you ready to proceed, Docktorr Jesus? Dr. Jesus: Yes sir, ready to begin test. Dr. Jesus: Excellent! I am now introducing the Jesus to Jesus... hmm, zhe subject seems to have already figured out zhe test material. Dr. Jesus: Making a note; 'subject shows high capacity for learning'. Jesus: Now zhe subject is lookink right at me, almost as if it... MEIN GOTT! MEIN Jesus! IT'S GOT MEIN Jesus! OH ZHE AGONY! ZHE AGONEEEEEEEEEEEEY! END LOG In light of incident Jesus-J-1, testing has been suspended indefinitely. - O5-█[/QUOTE] SCP - Now for hardcore Christians
[quote]Item #: SCP-71-J Object Class: The one that starts with K. ...or was it E? Special Containment Procedures: SCP-71-J is to be kept in a "fuzzy pickles"-lined containment chamber located in Stonehenge, where it is to be guarded at all times by no less than 7 inventors armed with bracelets . In the event that SCP-71-J ever begins eating its foot, Bob Schwiggan is to sniff SCP-71-J until it ceases its behavior. In the event of a containment breach, Mobile Task Force beta-7 (''Earthbounders'') is to be dispatched to SCP-71-J's last known location. Description: SCP-71-J is a hairy "New Age Retro Hippie". Like most members of its species, it is able to punch chickens with extreme prejudice , and regularly eats twice its own weight in "fuzzy pickles" each day. SCP-71-J's unusual properties manifest whenever it comes in contact with swords, which causes it to turn into an asshole. Whenever this happens, all Starmen within a 32 kilometer radius will begin to SMAAAAAAAAAASH uncontrollably, usually leading to civilian casualties. In addition, many researchers feel it has an uncanny resemblance to Tesla. Whether or not this is at all related to SCP-71-J's anomalous properties is unknown at this time. Recovery Log: SCP-71-J was first located in Onette where the Redskins were using it in order to send us all to the horror of eternal darkness. Thankfully, Mobile Task Force beta-7 (''Earthbounders'') was able to recover the object with only 7365963498156587634956348562347.6 civilian casualties. Addendum: Test Log 71-1 Dr. Schmukenhiefergrudel: Ello? Ello? Is zhis thing on? Ach, good. Zhis is Docktorr Schmukenhiefergrudel, and I am about to test SCP-71's reaction to mug. Are you ready to proceed, Docktorr Assholio? Dr. Assholio: Yes sir, ready to begin test. Dr. Schmukenhiefergrudel: Excellent! I am now introducing the mug to 71... hmm, zhe subject seems to have already figured out zhe test material. Dr. Assholio: Making a note; 'subject shows high capacity for learning'. Schmukenhiefergrudel: Now zhe subject is lookink right at me, almost as if it... MEIN GOTT! MEIN NOSE! IT'S GOT MEIN NOSE! OH ZHE AGONY! ZHE AGONEEEEEEEEEEEEY! END LOG In light of incident 71-J-1, testing has been suspended indefinitely. - O5-█ [/quote] Oh that was fun.
Quick! Before everyone gets tired of seeing these! [QUOTE]CLASSIFIED BY ORDER OF O5-█ Item #: SCP-7-J Object Class: TheatreKeter Special Containment Procedures: SCP-7-J is to be kept in a TACO-BELL BRAND DORITO TACO-lined containment chamber located in The Moon, where it is to be guarded at all times by no less than 1.5 Janitors armed with pit from super smash bros brawls. In the event that SCP-7-J ever begins Messaging its House, Dr. Cheeze Whiz is to rub SCP-7-J until it ceases its behavior. In the event of a containment breach, Mobile Task Force Funion-7 (''Mythbusters'') is to be dispatched to SCP-7-J's last known location. Description: SCP-7-J is a Slimy Banana. Like most members of its species, it is able to breathe station, and regularly eats twice its own weight in TACO-BELL BRAND DORITO TACO each day. SCP-7-J's unusual properties manifest whenever it comes in contact with Pirate Ships, which causes it to turn into Cup. Whenever this happens, all Dogs within a 4 kilometer radius will begin to garage uncontrollably, usually leading to civilian casualties. In addition, many researchers feel it has an uncanny resemblance to Charles Barkley. Whether or not this is at all related to SCP-7-J's anomalous properties is unknown at this time. Recovery Log: SCP-7-J was first located in New SmokersVille where the Redwings were using it in order to Crash the moon into the sun. Thankfully, Mobile Task Force Funion-7 (''A bunch of fucking monkeys'') was able to recover the object with only One-Hundered-Sixty-Ten civilian casualties. Addendum: Test Log 7-1 Dr. Dumbkoff: Ello? Ello? Is zhis thing on? Ach, good. Zhis is Docktorr Dumbkoff, and I am about to test SCP-7's reaction to building. Are you ready to proceed, Docktorr Brigade? Dr. Brigade: Yes sir, ready to begin test. Dr. Dumbkoff: Excellent! I am now introducing the building to 7... hmm, zhe subject seems to have already figured out zhe test material. Dr. Brigade: Making a note; 'subject shows high capacity for learning'. Dumbkoff: Now zhe subject is lookink right at me, almost as if it... MEIN GOTT! MEIN BASS! IT'S GOT MEIN BASS! OH ZHE AGONY! ZHE AGONEEEEEEEEEEEEY! END LOG In light of incident 7-J-1, testing has been suspended indefinitely. - O5-█ [/QUOTE] ATTACHED IMAGE DURING EVENT HORIZON FUNION-86-45-7-j [IMG]http://i.cubeupload.com/HNBLOE.png[/IMG]
[QUOTE=Icebrigade;36058002]Quick! Before everyone gets tired of seeing these! ATTACHED IMAGE DURING EVENT HORIZON FUNION-86-45-7-j [IMG]http://i.cubeupload.com/HNBLOE.png[/IMG][/QUOTE] um no it eats taco bell soft taco supremes
oh my god i'm dying [quote]SCP-643-J's unusual properties manifest whenever it comes in contact with hats, which causes it to turn into dick. Whenever this happens, all horsecocks within a 4532 kilometer radius will begin to anally violate uncontrollably, usually leading to civilian casualties. In addition, many researchers feel it has an uncanny resemblance to Thor, god of thunder. Whether or not this is at all related to SCP-643-J's anomalous properties is unknown at this time. [/quote] the rest wasn't so good but oh my god this part
[QUOTE=asteroidrules;36026610] There is that one sea creature that's too large for them to even tell what it is, let alone contain.[/QUOTE] Seriously this sounds awesome does anyone know which it is.
[QUOTE=Warriorx4;36059459]Seriously this sounds awesome does anyone know which it is.[/QUOTE] Well, there's [url=http://www.scp-wiki.net/scp-722]this[/url], which is a land monster and the true bestest lizerd ever. There's also [url=http://www.scp-wiki.net/scp-169]this.[/url]
[QUOTE=Krinkels;36059655]There's also [url=http://www.scp-wiki.net/scp-169]this.[/url][/QUOTE] That's the one!
CLASSIFIED BY ORDER OF O5-█ Item #: SCP-2007-J Object Class: Boobies Special Containment Procedures: SCP-2007-J is to be kept in a MilkandCooki-lined containment chamber located in Facepunch HQ, where it is to be guarded at all times by no less than Pvt.Martin Clerk armed with Jasun. In the event that SCP-2007-J ever begins AnotherWall its NateDude, Freakysoup is to was boobies SCP-2007-J until it ceases its behavior. In the event of a containment breach, Mobile Task Force VNL-7 (''Postal's Ass'') is to be dispatched to SCP-2007-J's last known location. Description: SCP-2007-J is a Funion That Cat. Like most members of its species, it is able to Freakysoup, and regularly eats twice its own weight in MilkandCooki each day. SCP-2007-J's unusual properties manifest whenever it comes in contact with BANNED USER, which causes it to turn into Griffster26. Whenever this happens, all Quinnjdq within a SeedEater kilometer radius will begin to Mr. Royzo uncontrollably, usually leading to civilian casualties. In addition, many researchers feel it has an uncanny resemblance to Ainsley Harriott. Whether or not this is at all related to SCP-2007-J's anomalous properties is unknown at this time. Recovery Log: SCP-2007-J was first located in Luftahrahnn where the FLoggin Moffins were using it in order to Sand his face because he was called ugly. Thankfully, Mobile Task Force VNL-7 (''Postal's Ass'') was able to recover the object with only Gary Newman civilian casualties. Addendum: Test Log 2007-1 Dr. Daijitsu: Ello? Ello? Is zhis thing on? Ach, good. Zhis is Docktorr Daijitsu, and I am about to test SCP-2007's reaction to Postal. Are you ready to proceed, Docktorr Sobotnik? Dr. Sobotnik: Yes sir, ready to begin test. Dr. Daijitsu: Excellent! I am now introducing the Postal to 2007... hmm, zhe subject seems to have already figured out zhe test material. Dr. Sobotnik: Making a note; 'subject shows high capacity for learning'. Daijitsu: Now zhe subject is lookink right at me, almost as if it... MEIN GOTT! MEIN Ryu-Gi! IT'S GOT MEIN Ryu-Gi! OH ZHE AGONY! ZHE AGONEEEEEEEEEEEEY! END LOG In light of incident 2007-J-1, testing has been suspended indefinitely. - O5-█
[quote]CLASSIFIED BY ORDER OF O5-█ Item #: SCP-69-J Object Class: Weedlord Special Containment Procedures: SCP-69-J is to be kept in a funyuns-lined containment chamber located in Compton, where it is to be guarded at all times by no less than 4 homies armed with weed. In the event that SCP-69-J ever begins smoking its diick2, Tupac is to smoke up SCP-69-J until it ceases its behavior. In the event of a containment breach, Mobile Task Force Epsilon-7 (''MTV Cribs'') is to be dispatched to SCP-69-J's last known location. Description: SCP-69-J is a phat bitch. Like most members of its species, it is able to clap dat ass, and regularly eats twice its own weight in funyuns each day. SCP-69-J's unusual properties manifest whenever it comes in contact with diick2, which causes it to turn into kush. Whenever this happens, all blunts within a 420 kilometer radius will begin to toke up uncontrollably, usually leading to civilian casualties. In addition, many researchers feel it has an uncanny resemblance to Snoop Dogg. Whether or not this is at all related to SCP-69-J's anomalous properties is unknown at this time. Recovery Log: SCP-69-J was first located in Grove Street where the The Lakers were using it in order to give her the dick. Thankfully, Mobile Task Force Epsilon-7 (''MTV Cribs'') was able to recover the object with only 420 civilian casualties. Addendum: Test Log 69-1 Dr. Dankenstein: Ello? Ello? Is zhis thing on? Ach, good. Zhis is Docktorr Dankenstein, and I am about to test SCP-69's reaction to weed. Are you ready to proceed, Docktorr Dilbert? Dr. Dilbert: Yes sir, ready to begin test. Dr. Dankenstein: Excellent! I am now introducing the weed to 69... hmm, zhe subject seems to have already figured out zhe test material. Dr. Dilbert: Making a note; 'subject shows high capacity for learning'. Dankenstein: Now zhe subject is lookink right at me, almost as if it... MEIN GOTT! MEIN diick2! IT'S GOT MEIN diick2! OH ZHE AGONY! ZHE AGONEEEEEEEEEEEEY! END LOG In light of incident 69-J-1, testing has been suspended indefinitely. - O5-█[/quote] from a friend of mine
[quote]CLASSIFIED BY ORDER OF O5-█ Item #: SCP-51-J Object Class: Ultra-Keter Special Containment Procedures: SCP-51-J is to be kept in a Popcorn-lined containment chamber located in Fort Knox, where it is to be guarded at all times by no less than 4 Proctologists armed with Pennies. In the event that SCP-51-J ever begins Fucking its Eye, Bright is to Squish SCP-51-J until it ceases its behavior. In the event of a containment breach, Mobile Task Force Delta-7 (''Josie and the Pussycats'') is to be dispatched to SCP-51-J's last known location. Description: SCP-51-J is a Slippery Penguin. Like most members of its species, it is able to Butt Love, and regularly eats twice its own weight in Popcorn each day. SCP-51-J's unusual properties manifest whenever it comes in contact with People, which causes it to turn into Computers. Whenever this happens, all Hands within a 94 kilometer radius will begin to Facepunching uncontrollably, usually leading to civilian casualties. In addition, many researchers feel it has an uncanny resemblance to Leonardo DiCaprio. Whether or not this is at all related to SCP-51-J's anomalous properties is unknown at this time. Recovery Log: SCP-51-J was first located in Asslickinstown where the Eagles were using it in order to Kill Mr. Rogers. Thankfully, Mobile Task Force Delta-7 (''Josie and the Pussycats'') was able to recover the object with only 15,252 civilian casualties. Addendum: Test Log 51-1 Dr. Doofinshmirtz: Ello? Ello? Is zhis thing on? Ach, good. Zhis is Docktorr Doofinshmirtz, and I am about to test SCP-51's reaction to Towel. Are you ready to proceed, Docktorr Heinz? Dr. Heinz: Yes sir, ready to begin test. Dr. Doofinshmirtz: Excellent! I am now introducing the Towel to 51... hmm, zhe subject seems to have already figured out zhe test material. Dr. Heinz: Making a note; 'subject shows high capacity for learning'. Doofinshmirtz: Now zhe subject is lookink right at me, almost as if it... MEIN GOTT! MEIN Penis! IT'S GOT MEIN Penis! OH ZHE AGONY! ZHE AGONEEEEEEEEEEEEY! END LOG In light of incident 51-J-1, testing has been suspended indefinitely. - O5-█ [/quote] The greatest thing
[QUOTE=Griffster26;36059789][SUB][SUB][SUB]CLASSIFIED BY ORDER OF O5-█ Item #: SCP-2007-J Object Class: Boobies Special Containment Procedures: SCP-2007-J is to be kept in a MilkandCooki-lined containment chamber located in Facepunch HQ, where it is to be guarded at all times by no less than Pvt.Martin Clerk armed with Jasun. [/SUB][/SUB][/SUB] In the event that SCP-2007-J ever begins AnotherWall its [B]NateDude[/B], Freakysoup is to was boobies SCP-2007-J until it ceases its behavior. In the event of a containment breach, Mobile Task Force VNL-7 (''Postal's Ass'') is to be dispatched to SCP-2007-J's last known location. [SUB][SUB][SUB] Description: SCP-2007-J is a Funion That Cat. Like most members of its species, it is able to Freakysoup, and regularly eats twice its own weight in MilkandCooki each day. SCP-2007-J's unusual properties manifest whenever it comes in contact with BANNED USER, which causes it to turn into Griffster26. Whenever this happens, all Quinnjdq within a SeedEater kilometer radius will begin to Mr. Royzo uncontrollably, usually leading to civilian casualties. In addition, many researchers feel it has an uncanny resemblance to Ainsley Harriott. Whether or not this is at all related to SCP-2007-J's anomalous properties is unknown at this time. Recovery Log: SCP-2007-J was first located in Luftahrahnn where the FLoggin Moffins were using it in order to Sand his face because he was called ugly. Thankfully, Mobile Task Force VNL-7 (''Postal's Ass'') was able to recover the object with only Gary Newman civilian casualties. Addendum: Test Log 2007-1 Dr. Daijitsu: Ello? Ello? Is zhis thing on? Ach, good. Zhis is Docktorr Daijitsu, and I am about to test SCP-2007's reaction to Postal. Are you ready to proceed, Docktorr Sobotnik? Dr. Sobotnik: Yes sir, ready to begin test. Dr. Daijitsu: Excellent! I am now introducing the Postal to 2007... hmm, zhe subject seems to have already figured out zhe test material. Dr. Sobotnik: Making a note; 'subject shows high capacity for learning'. Daijitsu: Now zhe subject is lookink right at me, almost as if it... MEIN GOTT! MEIN Ryu-Gi! IT'S GOT MEIN Ryu-Gi! OH ZHE AGONY! ZHE AGONEEEEEEEEEEEEY! END LOG In light of incident 2007-J-1, testing has been suspended indefinitely. - O5-█[/SUB][/SUB][/SUB][/QUOTE] I'm famous! :dance:
[QUOTE=Krinkels;36059655]Well, there's [URL="http://www.scp-wiki.net/scp-722"]this[/URL], which is a land monster and the true bestest lizerd ever. There's also [URL="http://www.scp-wiki.net/scp-169"]this.[/URL][/QUOTE] Thanks! Man, those are friggen neat. Reminds me of that real life island shaped like a giant person laying down.
I made a new scp [url]http://www.scp-wiki.net/scp-1341[/url] Jungle in a jar
[QUOTE=Ghhostface;36061670]I made a new scp [url]http://www.scp-wiki.net/scp-1341[/url] Jungle in a jar[/QUOTE] holy shit that second picture
[QUOTE=Griffster26;36059789] SCP-2007-J's unusual properties manifest whenever it comes in contact with BANNED USER, which causes it to turn into Griffster26. Whenever this happens, all [B]Quinnjdq[/B] within a SeedEater kilometer radius will begin to [B]Mr. Royzo[/B] uncontrollably, usually leading to civilian casualties. [/QUOTE] I would be extremely happy if I began to Mr. Royzo, that guy is fucking amazing.
[QUOTE=UberMunchkin;36067186]- They basically are able to pry open the prey's eyes while they are unconscious. Then they lower the abdomen on the pupil. And the spikes are able to remove it. The spider then climbs in where the pupil was removed and puled out. - Then it proceeds to implant acid down the optic nerve. Which further connects to the brain - The person (Or any living animal) is turned into the host for the spider, which will end up killing them in 2 weeks - Worst thing is that the host wakes up and is aware something is wrong when the host transfer is finished. Basically a [url=http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/FateWorseThanDeath]fate worse than death[/url][/QUOTE] My eye hurts now. Anyway, I think there was an SCP in which did this, sort of working like a headcrab.
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