The SCP Foundation - "Send in the D-Class!"

[Pilotguy]

[QUOTE=Spycrabz;32585515]Secure, Contain, Penis[/QUOTE]

Seduction. Copulation. Pregnancy.

Straight from the "Things Dr. Bright isn't allowed to do at the foundation".

[Crimor]

[QUOTE=Someone4956;32585882]Done.

Yeah, I guess that'll work.[/QUOTE]

Though, we have no idea where it stores the items, and there might be 3 more safes, on the other hand it wouldn't be a good idea to put something dangerous in it :v:

[Missing User]

What was the name of the guy that made the statue 173 is based off again?

[Thoughtless]

[QUOTE=Spycrabz;32586312]What was the name of the guy that made the statue 173 is based off again?[/QUOTE]

Steven Moffat. The statues are called weeping angels and it's from the popular BBC program Doctor Who.

[editline]2nd October 2011[/editline]

But to be fair they where based on the big boos from the Mario games.

[Crimor]

[QUOTE=Thoughtless;32586432]Steven Moffat. The statues are called weeping angels and it's from the popular BBC program Doctor Who.

[editline]2nd October 2011[/editline]

But to be fair they where based on the big boos from the Mario games.[/QUOTE]

If I remember right there's a really old myth about statues moving when you're not looking, so it's probably taken from there rather than boos

[Zezibesh]

[QUOTE=Spycrabz;32586312]What was the name of the guy that made the statue 173 is based off again?[/QUOTE]

Izumi Kato

[jericokez]

Guys, what does Document # 162-D of SCP-216 sound like?

[Missing User]

[QUOTE=Thoughtless;32586432]Steven Moffat. The statues are called weeping angels and it's from the popular BBC program Doctor Who.

[editline]2nd October 2011[/editline]

But to be fair they where based on the big boos from the Mario games.[/QUOTE]

I mean the guy who made the statue in the picture of it.

[editline]2nd October 2011[/editline]

[QUOTE=Zezibesh;32586913]Izumi Kato[/QUOTE]

This guy

[Crimor]

216 is just intriguing me, there's so many experiments I'd try.

[matrix_1995]

[QUOTE=Kaizo45;32581777]I think most of the underground portion would look like the feed from 895, with the occassional room and hall filled with offices. I always had a mental image of a Chernobyl like exterior, but cleaner.[/QUOTE]

I always imagined the sites as being a mix of Aperture Science and the underground complexes from S.T.A.L.K.E.R. :v:

[Richard Longflop]

I request next thread title to be "Science for the Science God"

And, someone should start up a 1.8.1 minecraft server so we can all make an SCP foundation base or something.

[Egg]

-snip-

[Dead Madman]

[QUOTE=Egg;32588813]I have an idea for a new SCP.

It should be a mosquito that is so annoying that anyone that are near it for more than 1 minute will go instantly mentally ill, although killing it will make them normal again. It automatically "respawns" after 90 minutes of death, no matter what the death cause may have been.[/QUOTE]

Throw it in a box and chuck it in the ocean. Job done

[Egg]

-snip-

[Hakita]

I just had a little idea for an SCP.

Its an old computer screen that is not plugged into anything other than a keyboard.
Any question can be typed on the keyboard and the screen will tell the answer to the question, no matter how hard it is.
However, it hides subconscious messages into all the answers, that, after a long exposure will make the reader psychotic and kill anyone he can see, involving himself.
Because of the hidden messages, no logs can be kept from the discussions with the machine, meaning that none of the answers it gives will be known to more people than the person asking the questions.

[Blooper Reel]

[QUOTE=Hakita;32589395]I just had a little idea for an SCP.

Its an old computer screen that is not plugged into anything other than a keyboard.
Any question can be typed on the keyboard and the screen will tell the answer to the question, no matter how hard it is.
However, it hides subconscious messages into all the answers, that, after a long exposure will make the reader psychotic and kill anyone he can see, involving himself.
Because of the hidden messages, no logs can be kept from the discussions with the machine, meaning that none of the answers it gives will be known to more people than the person asking the questions.[/QUOTE]

You could make it so that a screenshot of the answer will not have the same anomalous effects as the genuine thing.

[Hakita]

[QUOTE=Blooper Reel;32589604]You could make it so that a screenshot of the answer will not have the same anomalous effects as the genuine thing.[/QUOTE]
The point of not being able to keep any of the answers is so that even though the computer knows all, the knownledge cannot be shared, so if someone finds out the meaning of life thanks to it, nobody else can.

[J.C.DentonUNATCO]

[QUOTE=matrix_1995;32587298]I always imagined the sites as being a mix of Aperture Science and the underground complexes from S.T.A.L.K.E.R. :v:[/QUOTE]

I like to imagine the common areas like the canteen and such are like the Men in Black facility.

[Aasokeo]

[QUOTE=Oink92;32584950]Holy fucking shit this is the best SCP ever.

[URL="http://scp-wiki.wikidot.com/scp-458"]http://scp-wiki.wikidot.com/scp-458[/URL][/QUOTE]

[QUOTE=]I would just like to remind all staff that just because we have a pizza box that can constantly create pizzas for you does not mean that you can just sit around and eat pizza all afternoon. If continued abuse of the box continues, coupled with reports of personnel gaining unhealthy amounts of weight, I may be forced to implement a mandatory physical training regiment following lunch hours.

-Dr. del Morrino[/QUOTE]

:v:

[Luminaut]

[QUOTE]Input: 1 lb. raw ground beef
Setting: Very Fine
Output: [DATA EXPUNGED]. Appeared to be [DATA EXPUNGED] ██████████ started mooing ██████████ bitten subject [DATA EXPUNGED] ██████████ escaped into ██████████ screaming ██████████ [DATA EXPUNGED] hungry for [DATA EXPUNGED]. Subject immediately terminated.[/QUOTE]

:ohdear:

[Zombii]

[url]http://sandbox.scp-wiki.net/zombiis-test[/url]

What do you guys think of "Footsteps"?

[Neat!]

Took Hakita's idea and ran with it.

Its an old computer screen that is not plugged into anything other than a keyboard.
Any question can be typed on the keyboard and the screen will tell the answer to the question, no matter how hard it is.
The effects of SCP-XXX on the reader vary depending on the question. For example, asking SCP-XXX "where is New York", results in 40° 30′ "N ,45° 1′ N......71° 51′ W , 79° 46′ W". No side-effects are observed when questions like this are answered.
However, if you ask SCP-XXX "What is [DATA REDACTED] (subject's name)", the answer effects the asker.
After a long exposure will make the reader obsessive compulsive and prone to seeking out any three-dimensional cube with at least two sides being squares.
Upon acquiring these shapes, the reader (now christened SCP-XXX-1) has been observed placing said shapes in a grid-like pattern in the area of containment. The attitude of the grid has so far been divorced from the attitude of the area of the containment (The grid seems to be in accordance to Earth's magnetosphere)
The reader will gradually cease communication with the outside world, excluding monotone "grinding" noises similar to that of a hard drive or a floppy disk. The noises seem to have patterns, yet it is unknown whether or not this is communication. Testing SCP-XXX-1 for intelligence is underway.
Because of the hidden messages, no logs can be kept from the discussions with the machine, meaning that none of the answers it gives will be known to more people than the person asking the questions.

Will work on it later

[mini me]

[QUOTE=Skittles7;32591476]:ohdear:[/QUOTE]
that machine is my fave SCP ever!

[Dead Madman]

I want to scrap my other idea and start with one that is somewhat similar

seriously

Prepare your anus

SCP-████

Appearance -
Height : 7"4
Weight : Weightless

[NOTE : The subject has a piano [built in 1934] grafted to his legs]

[ALSO NOTE : The subject appears to have knives forced vigorously into the mouth, creating the appearance that it is smiling]

[ALSO NOTE : The subject MUST hear no other noise than the piano of which is grafted to the legs, if sound of piano is broken, it stares into the victims eye's until the eyes fall out]

Encounters
---------------
The following Encounter took place on ██/█/████ :

[NOTE : The subject has had it's hearing orifice's plugged]

[COMMANDER] : D-Class, you are required to test how the subject reacts if the sound is broken

[D-CLASS ENTER ROOM]

[D] Unit 1 : Okay guys, I call dibs on not taking the plugs out

[D] Unit 2 : It's fine, I'll do it.

[UNIT 2 WALKS TOWARDS THE SUBJECT SLOWLY]

[D] Unit 3 : Easy there, █████

[UNIT 2 ATTEMPTS TO REMOVE THE PLUGS]

[D] Unit 1 : Wait! Before you do that, keep in mind, there must be NO noise.

[D] Unit 2 : Ok...

[UNIT 2 SUCCESSFULLY REMOVES THE PLUGS]

[UNIT 2 SLOWLY BACKS AWAY TO THE WALL]

[THE SUBJECT CONTINUES TO PLAY THE PIANO]

[10 MINUTES AFTER]

[COMMANDER] [TO EARPIECE'S] : Ok men, one of you must now make a noise

[D-CLASS UNIT 2 MAKES A THUMBS UP GESTURE]

[UNIT 2 NOW WALKS TOWARDS THE SUBJECT]

[D] Unit 3 : This is bullshit, fuck this!

[THE SUBJECT SLAMS THE PIANO AND LOOKS UP, THEN SLOWLY TWISTS IT'S HEAD AROUND TO UNIT 3]

[D] Unit 2 : Don't look into it's eyes, it'll fucking kill you!

[AS UNIT 2 SAYS THIS, THE SUBJECT QUICKLY TURNS IT'S HEAD TOWARDS UNIT 2]

[D] Unit 1 : That smile is so....O-

[THE SUBJECT NOW STARES INTO UNIT 1'S EYES, MAKING UNIT 1 UNABLE TO BREAK EYE CONTACT]

[D] Unit 1 : Guys...GUYS...GUYS IT'S....OH GOD....

[UNIT 1'S EYES ARE NOW DISLODGED FROM THE HEAD AND FALL TO THE FLOOR]

[D] Unit 1 : Guys, I can't see....MY FUCKING GOD I'M BLIND!

[D] Unit 3 : It's ok ███, it's taken your eyes...just stay calm, it's not going to hurt you..

[D] Unit 2 : Oh my god, what's that on your he-

[THE SUBJECT NOW STARES INTO UNIT 2'S EYES, MAKING UNIT 2 UNABLE TO BREAK CONTACT]

[D] Unit 2 : [Screams] MY EYES....THE BURN.... HELP ME PLEASE...MY FUCKING EYES!

[D] Unit 3 : What the fuck....

[D] Unit 2 : What? What's happening

[D] Unit 3 : Oh god it's...OH SHIT GET ME OUT OF HERE

[D] Unit 2 : What? I can't see shit what's happening?

[D] Unit 3 : Oh god the piano...it's...It's...IT'S.....

[SCP:// FEEDEND]

Encounter 2
--------------
THE FOLLOWING WAS EXTRACTED FROM THE JOURNAL OF █████ █████ ON THE ██/█/1939

My ███, ████, bought me a piano today, it's so good! It's got such a clear and crisp sound to it! I did notice one thing though, as I played it, when ████ watched me play, his eyes looked very odd, I mean, he never stares at me like that. His face appears dead, yet his eyes are something of a O. Very odd. But, ██. █████ should know what to do, after all, he IS a ██████. I must go now, I must gain sleep for my big day tomorrow at the pub!

2 hours later
---------------
My god...███ just did the STRANGEST thing...He just walked into the room and started scratching ████'s face, I turned over and saw him staring at her with his eye's like they are when I play the piano. I asked him "████, what on earth are you doing? Get back into bed. NOW."

He did nothing, just stared.

He's still standing at the end of the bed now, just staring, he won't move at all.

He keeps... wait.... by ███'s name.... he's...he's...He's....

[LARGE RIPS ARE NOW SEEN ON THE PAGE]

Encounter 3
---------------
Extracted from an e-mail sent by ████ ████ to his ███████████ on the ██/██/2003

Hey me-ma! I been waitin' to see ye' all damn month :)

Anyway, ████'s keepin' up the good ol' work. She's cleanin' the house as usual. That damn ███ from the music store keeps watchin' me as I pass on by. He has some sort of fetish for that ol' piece o' shit piano he keeps in that dang window. He's such an odd old feller' anyway....
[REMOVED DUE TO BEING UNRELATED TO SUBJECT]

Encounter 4
--------------
[A MOTHER, █████ ████, ██ YEARS OF AGE, TOLD SCP THE FOLLOWING] :

"My son has been talking to my piano, strange little fellow. But he's like that y'know, he's always been a bit odd. It was only when he was █ he started telling my daughter that she's "the last one left", little guy's just a bit disturbed, y'know, after living with his DAMN father..."

[SCP] So what did your son say to this piano?

"Well, he keeps grooming it, as if it's ill, saying stuff like "There there, it'll be alright, you'll get your silence one day""

[SCP] Thank you Mrs. ████, your words help us greatly.

What do you guys think?

[Aerkhan]

heh.

[quote]Input: 20 doses MDMA, 20 doses of LSD, and 20 doses "Viagra"
Setting: Very Fine
Output: One hundred (100) 17µg gel capsules, golden and luminescent. One (1) capsule administered to male D-class test subject, with effects identical to "Fine" output appearing after 30 seconds. Subject was very docile and, while coherent, would not answer questions. After 15 minutes, subject entered a catatonic state for a period of 74 hours during which time subject was observed to have seizures resulting in ejaculation. Upon awakening, subject displayed a marked deadening of emotion, showed no interest in pleasurable activities, and was unable to be sexually aroused. When interviewed, subject stated he "just didn't care anymore". Subject terminated and autopsied, show severe damage specific to emotional centers of the brain. More tests pending.

Note: While there may be possible therapeutic benefits to the "Fine" and "Very Fine" outputs, I suggest that more tests be run on subjects of both genders. The output results are to be kept in my office safe unless being tested. -Dr. Palmer

Wait, how does that even work? Viagra is a vasodilator, not an aphrodisiac.
~Dr. Trebuchet

This test may indicate that SCP-914 understands the use of input objects and not simply their function. Recommend testing with medicines reliant on the placebo effect to ascertain if outputs provide actual medicinal solutions to problems. -Dr. Pyrrhus[/quote]

[Hakita]

[QUOTE=Neat!;32591925]Took Hakita's idea and ran with it.

Its an old computer screen that is not plugged into anything other than a keyboard.
Any question can be typed on the keyboard and the screen will tell the answer to the question, no matter how hard it is.
The effects of SCP-XXX on the reader vary depending on the question. For example, asking SCP-XXX "where is New York", results in 40° 30′ "N ,45° 1′ N......71° 51′ W , 79° 46′ W". No side-effects are observed when questions like this are answered.
However, if you ask SCP-XXX "What is [DATA REDACTED] (subject's name)", the answer effects the asker.
After a long exposure will make the reader obsessive compulsive and prone to seeking out any three-dimensional cube with at least two sides being squares.
Upon acquiring these shapes, the reader (now christened SCP-XXX-1) has been observed placing said shapes in a grid-like pattern in the area of containment. The attitude of the grid has so far been divorced from the attitude of the area of the containment (The grid seems to be in accordance to Earth's magnetosphere)
The reader will gradually cease communication with the outside world, excluding monotone "grinding" noises similar to that of a hard drive or a floppy disk. The noises seem to have patterns, yet it is unknown whether or not this is communication. Testing SCP-XXX-1 for intelligence is underway.
Because of the hidden messages, no logs can be kept from the discussions with the machine, meaning that none of the answers it gives will be known to more people than the person asking the questions.

Will work on it later[/QUOTE]
I like it.
I'd love to read the rest of it when you're done.

[Mao II]

[QUOTE=Zakkin;32588196]I request next thread title to be "Science for the Science God"

[/QUOTE]

Or "Throw D-Class at it untill it stops".

[3mpty]

It's hard to choose the title :P

I didn't really get enough input for this thread to pick a good title.

[Aerkhan]

SCP v2: Science for the Science god! Throw D-Class at it until it stops!

[Hakita]

The SCP Foundation Mk.2 - D-Class for the D-Class God!