I believe RayvenQ wants to commit suicide!!! Can someone please contact and help him !! - General

[QUOTE=Soriddo;48921473]Like I told someone else who went through a similar situation as you, I know I'll sound like an asshole when I say this, but[/QUOTE] Can't imagine why you'd [I]sound like an asshole[/I] by making that post. Hmm, wonder why. Seriously, if anyone else wants to post stupid, unhelpful shit like "hurr just man up, get over it." just don't, you're literally doing the opposite of helping.

If you can, stop caring, my impression is that you care but keep getting let down by your health and people around you. Caring about yourself, other people, your life, isnt really neccasarry, just survive and maybe retain some humor for self satisfaction, its in human nature to want to survive if you are at default. You may want to do more than you can, but sometimes all you can do is laugh, make a game of it. Get food, get rent, if you absolutely need to, get yourself imprisoned for the free shelter and grub. Theres a few other things you could do if you really have nothing better to do than die, depending on your interests things like volunteering overseas if you can find a group that will pay your way. If you successfully achieve not caring status, going around to somewhere you can publicly whine and bitch about various things might get you some attention, comments or help from someone who can actually do something rather than just some internet shmucks. most probably wont agree with this advice but i think it was worth posting my take. maybe it was helpful. Also rayvenq best moderator.

There aren't too many people I despise but those who suggest "Suck it up and grow some lol" are high on the list. It's disgraceful. I'm lucky enough to have a family I can talk to and even they don't seem to understand it's not easy to just take it on the chin and get over some issues.

Hey Raven, If you want to talk in PM, we share some similarities in regards to what is happening to you. It's just nothing I'm comfortable talking about on a public board. I mean, its cool if you don't want to chat with a total stranger but I think we could have something of a fruitful exchange. It's just, your story sounds so familiar to me and I can relate a lot to what you're saying

[QUOTE=draugur;48918928]You're doing this wrong mate. You don't give rough advice to people who are on the verge of suicide. That's not how it fucking works at all. Rough advice comes later when they're more stable.[/QUOTE] Sure. Don't be honest and straightforward with people on the verge of suicide. Feed them with false hopes and with what they want to hear so they can delude themselves even further. That sure fucking works. ________________________________ Look I just bothered enough to read through the essential here. You cannot hold someone to a promise they made on an early stage of a relationship. People change, projections of the future change as well. You spent all those years with her but she's not THE only woman. She's a woman. And I'm pretty sure there's a lot of other woman who would want to be there for you if they had the chance. I don't know if you were always this depressive, but for fuck's sake, a breakup isn't a reason to start getting all suicidal in an all out call for attention. It is also pretty evident that you're not going to kill yourself. I had a fair share of friends who committed suicide and none of them wrote about it to anyone. People who are really going to kill themselves don't usually cry out to the world that they're gonna do so, They isolate, to the point no one can talk to them and then it happens and no one sees it coming. You, my friend, need to pick yourself up. Deal with harshness, it sucks but it builds character. Get used to it. People are inconstant. They change their mind. Life's a surprise. So are people. Get over it. Learn to love yourself. [editline]17th October 2015[/editline] [QUOTE=loopoo;48918689]Unpopular opinion time: I don't know how you can get to the ripe old age of 30 and still handle a breakup this badly. It was only for two years as well? Calling your ex a fucking sociopath / psychopath because she chose what was best for her in her life (which I don't blame her for, you only live once, I'd do whatever is best for myself as well, and I definitely wouldn't act like I owe it to someone to stay with them forever just cause I'm dating them) is pretty unfair imo. It sucks super hard that you're depressed and having thoughts of suicide, but I think the best thing you could do right now is surround yourself with friends / family. Sitting in your room and just beating yourself up and drowning yourself out with all these self-damaging thoughts ain't gonna do nothing but keep you down. Suicide definitely isn't the way to go, either. There's still plenty to live for. Plus you've got all these people here trying to help you out, which means you've had a positive effect on their lives and it'd make them feel awful if you decided to go through with it. I'm sure it's not just these people on the forums, you've got close friends and family who'd really miss having you around. Sorry to sorta kick you when you're down, but genuinely, although what you had with that girl was the best two years of your life, you're still pretty young in the grand scheme of things. There's still so much more for you to experience and people to meet. You might meet someone a few months down the line in the most surprising way and get to have those 7 years of an amazing relationship that you wish you had with this girl. I think your pre-existing condition of depression is just making normal breakup shitty feelings 10x worse, and you gotta realise that if you just fight off these shitty feelings, you'll eventually go back to feeling how you were before (I dunno if I could say "happy" but maybe "indifferent"? At least that rather than wanting to commit suicide).[/QUOTE] Also this guy right here ^ Fucking A comment.

[QUOTE=Behemoth_PT;48922594]People who are really going to kill themselves don't usually cry out to the world that they're gonna do so, They isolate, to the point no one can talk to them and then it happens and no one sees it coming.[/QUOTE] I don't really have the balls to kill myself, I get that. Anything you would recommend?

[QUOTE=Behemoth_PT;48922594]Sure. Don't be honest and straightforward with people on the verge of suicide. Feed them with false hopes and with what they want to hear so they can delude themselves even further. That sure fucking works. ________________________________ Look I just bothered enough to read through the essential here. You cannot hold someone to a promise they made on an early stage of a relationship. People change, projections of the future change as well. You spent all those years with her but she's not THE only woman. She's a woman. And I'm pretty sure there's a lot of other woman who would want to be there for you if they had the chance. I don't know if you were always this depressive, but for fuck's sake, a breakup isn't a reason to start getting all suicidal in an all out call for attention. It is also pretty evident that you're not going to kill yourself. I had a fair share of friends who committed suicide and none of them wrote about it to anyone. People who are really going to kill themselves don't usually cry out to the world that they're gonna do so, They isolate, to the point no one can talk to them and then it happens and no one sees it coming. You, my friend, need to pick yourself up. Deal with harshness, it sucks but it builds character. Get used to it. People are inconstant. They change their mind. Life's a surprise. So are people. Get over it. Learn to love yourself. [editline]17th October 2015[/editline] Also this guy right here ^ Fucking A comment.[/QUOTE] that's really easy for you to talk about when you weren't in the same boat as he is. People act as though everything they say to depressed and suicidal people is gold bar tier advise, but asking them to 'man up' when they're too emotionally unstable and on the verge of offing themselves is usually as good as triggering themselves into going through with the suicide attempt. The basic rule of thumb is that you dont try to break somebody even further down than they already are when they're in a bad way because worse things can easily happen. Also remember that your friends are not always representative of all those who committed suicide tbh, since if a cry for help goes ignored, it can lead to trouble equally well as anybody who cuts themselves off from all communication. Nobody sees all attempts of suicide in coming because its humanly impossible to look out for all the involved factors, not because the fellow cuts themselves off from the world. And to reiterate; there's a time and place for brutal honesty. This isnt it.

I think Behemoth has stupidly forgotten that depression is subjective which means the experiences and potential acts throughout vary from person to person. Some suicidal people will call out of attention as a way to get help, others choose silence. There's no one true way to help each and every individual. And frankly, telling people to "deal with it" is not the most clever thing you can do. Don't do it.

[B]Samaritans ([URL="http://www.samaritans.org):"]www.samaritans.org):[/URL][/B] Voice: 116 123 (24/7 Free to call, will not appear on phone bills, formerly 08457 90 90 90) Text: 07725909090 Email: [EMAIL="emailjo@samaritans.org"]emailjo@samaritans.org[/EMAIL] [B]Helplines for Men from thecalmzone.net:[/B] Voice: 0800 58 58 58 (5pm to midnight nationwide, also 0808 802 58 58 London and 0800 58 58 58 Merseyside) Text 07537 404717 (5pm to midnight, start your text with CALM2) Online Chat: [URL]https://www.thecalmzone.net/help/get-help/[/URL] Please get in contact with any of these. I don't think anyone in this forums are really qualified for this sort of things. I don't want to hear about a fellow facepuncher killing himself, [B]especially[/B] you. [B]Please seek help.[/B]

Hey guys, can mods do anything to help?

[QUOTE=NiandraLades;48922678]Hey guys, can mods do anything to help?[/QUOTE] Last time we had this happen, IP addresses or anything else that helps emergency services find him if worst comes to worst. It was one factor in intervening in Sobotni's attempt

I really hope your doing fine RayvenQ. I can't do much to help, but I'm willing to help by being a friend if you ever need it. Really wish I could offer more to you.

[QUOTE=ScottyWired;48922694]Last time we had this happen, IP addresses or anything else that helps emergency services find him if worst comes to worst. It was one factor in intervening in Sobotni's attempt[/QUOTE] Yeah, no that'd absoloutely not help, calling the emergency services on me right now, I mean hell, I feel guilty as fuck that I've prompted someone to make this thread, and that this much attention has been brought to me. Having the emergency services come intervene would just make me feel much much worse. I'm out of imminent danger, for now, Just have to hope that nothing will happen that triggers me back into how I was last night or a couple of days before.

When the police stopped me that one time I was like really annoyed and embarrassed I probably would've stopped if I had more time to think it through, but no I had to be ~saved~ so I can tell whoever saved me that they're MY HERO~

[QUOTE=RayvenQ;48922732]Yeah, no that'd absoloutely not help, calling the emergency services on me right now, I mean hell, I feel guilty as fuck that I've prompted someone to make this thread, and that this much attention has been brought to me. Having the emergency services come intervene would just make me feel much much worse. I'm out of imminent danger, for now, Just have to hope that nothing will happen that triggers me back into how I was last night or a couple of days before.[/QUOTE] I don't know much about your life or situation, do you feel it would be possible to go therapy of some sort? [editline]17th October 2015[/editline] [QUOTE=fear me;48922742]When the police stopped me that one time I was like really annoyed and embarrassed I probably would've stopped if I had more time to think it through, but no I had to be ~saved~ so I can tell whoever saved me that they're MY HERO~[/QUOTE] I mean no offence but I have no idea what you're saying nor what this adds to the topic. That someone called the police on your suicide attempt and now you're mocking them or something?

[QUOTE=doommarine23;48922756]I mean no offence but I have no idea what you're saying nor what this adds to the topic. That someone called the police on your suicide attempt and now you're mocking them or something?[/QUOTE] yeah good point

[QUOTE=fear me;48922742]When the police stopped me that one time I was like really annoyed and embarrassed I probably would've stopped if I had more time to think it through, but no I had to be ~saved~ so I can tell whoever saved me that they're MY HERO~[/QUOTE] "ugh stupid emergency services doing their job, why can't they just leave me alone"

Can we please stop. This thread isn't about either of you or me. If you need or want to talk to someone about something, please PM me. But this isn't about us; this is about taking care of one of our own.

[QUOTE=Sokrates;48922672][B]Samaritans ([URL="http://www.samaritans.org):"]www.samaritans.org):[/URL][/B] Voice: 116 123 (24/7 Free to call, will not appear on phone bills, formerly 08457 90 90 90) Text: 07725909090 Email: [EMAIL="emailjo@samaritans.org"]emailjo@samaritans.org[/EMAIL] [B]Helplines for Men from thecalmzone.net:[/B] Voice: 0800 58 58 58 (5pm to midnight nationwide, also 0808 802 58 58 London and 0800 58 58 58 Merseyside) Text 07537 404717 (5pm to midnight, start your text with CALM2) Online Chat: [URL]https://www.thecalmzone.net/help/get-help/[/URL] Please get in contact with any of these. I don't think anyone in this forums are really qualified for this sort of things. I don't want to hear about a fellow facepuncher killing himself, [B]especially[/B] you. [B]Please seek help.[/B][/QUOTE] This. [QUOTE=RayvenQ;48922732]Yeah, no that'd absoloutely not help, calling the emergency services on me right now, I mean hell, I feel guilty as fuck that I've prompted someone to make this thread, and that this much attention has been brought to me. Having the emergency services come intervene would just make me feel much much worse. I'm out of imminent danger, for now, Just have to hope that nothing will happen that triggers me back into how I was last night or a couple of days before.[/QUOTE] You need to get help. Go to your GP or if you feel you may want to commit suicide, head to the hospital and talk to them. You need to engage with the NHS to get help. Think about all the support you've had in this thread and no doubt how many other people are concerned about you. We would all be devastated if you were to take your own life. We know you are suffering but we don't pretend to understand or know what it is like. Everybody has their demons, but your strength of character is what matters. If there's anything I know about you it is that you are determined and you get through this if you want to. It will not be easy and will be a gradual process but you can do it. If you start feeling low, please contact the Samaritans or head to the hospital. I've had a few people contact me recently and the last thing I want to do is send officers around to check on you. But I will if it is necessary.

Rayven, I encourage you to stay in contact with someone who can make sure you're alright. Even if it's someone you frequently talk to on here. I'm glad you're feeling better for now though. That's good news. Take care of yourself and take any negative posts here with a grain of salt.

[QUOTE=Hezzy;48922853] If you start feeling low, please contact the Samaritans or head to the hospital. I've had a few people contact me recently and the last thing I want to do is send officers around to check on you. But I will if it is necessary.[/QUOTE] Just to be clear, that is the worst possible thing you could do, because it won't make me want to seek help or anything, it'll just do the reverse, It'll make me not seek help and keep absoloutely silent on it, to the point where I'll become like the friends Behemoth mentioned. It's only really thanks to the thread that I'm even talking about it. And to Behemoth, and others that can't seem to get this point. It isn't about the breakup, but rather the breakup, more specifically how was the hammerblow to a keystone of an already teetering arch. It's like kicking the corner support out of a wall that is already on the verge of collapse, it's not the cause, it's just the thing that finally made it fall over. I can ignore the ones who are being harsh, because positive or negative isn't really impacting my mind. Like with people saying "lots of people care for you" I'm just thinking to myself "Good for them, care, or lack of, however, isn't the root cause of all this." My depression et al isn't based on a lack of care, it's based on suffering, suffering that only ever gets worse. People say things will be better, but they really wont, my back is worse all the time, the pain is worse, it impacts my joints and the rest of my body. I'm already fucking housebound and constantly evaluate on leaving the house based on whether or not i deem it worth the pain and suffering. I mean for fucks sake, my back fractures the vertabrae on a regular basis over, well, nothing, just how it is.

[QUOTE=RayvenQ;48922870]Just to be clear, that is the worst possible thing you could do, because it won't make me want to seek help or anything, it'll just do the reverse, It'll make me not seek help and keep absoloutely silent on it, to the point where I'll become like the friends Behemoth mentioned. It's only really thanks to the thread that I'm even talking about it. And to Behemoth, and others that can't seem to get this point. It isn't about the breakup, but rather the breakup, more specifically how was the hammerblow to a keystone of an already teetering arch. It's like kicking the corner support out of a wall that is already on the verge of collapse, it's not the cause, it's just the thing that finally made it fall over.[/QUOTE] I deal with suicidal people on a near weekly basis. They all think it is the worst possible thing that happened to them, they feel embarrassed, angry, upset, usually directing their emotions towards themselves. But it is necessary because it forces them to engage with the Mental Health Services. It is never pleasant being involved with the police but unfortunately it is sometimes necessary. This is why it is important you seek the help of your own volition, through your GP or the hospital. If you do that then we won't get to the point that the help is forced.

There is a lot of ways this can go but look at it like this, we're anonymous strangers on the internet with no faces nor identity, all of us even you. You could easily be lying. But we don't care about that, to us you're a person, human; a valuable life as any other and we don't want to see you in pain, nor do we want to see you end everything. Think about that, if a bunch of internet strangers care about you, others will too, surely something like a therapist would be helpful, there is always good people, always helpers out there.

Is there any kind of surgery or something that can make it more bearable? Sorry to ask, but I don't know much on the subject.

[QUOTE=Sgt. Khorn;48922903]Is there any kind of surgery or something that can make it more bearable? Sorry to ask, but I don't know much on the subject.[/QUOTE] I tried to get it int he past, but the doctor pretty much refused on the basis of he'd probably put me in a wheelchair or kill me, even though I was crying, begging and pleading telling him I'd sign any sort of form to absolve him of responsibility if it went wrong. But he still refused.

Have you gone recently to find more options? Physical Therapy or another doctor who may have another solution? I have a feeling that there has to be more than just that one doctor willing to help or offer something that may help alleviate the pain, if not get rid of it entirely.

[QUOTE=Pascall;48922926]Have you gone recently to find more options? Physical Therapy or another doctor who may have another solution? I have a feeling that there has to be more than just that one doctor willing to help or offer something that may help alleviate the pain, if not get rid of it entirely.[/QUOTE] I've pretty much tried everything possible. Nothings works, or at least to the point where they make things better rather than just change the precise nature of the physical suffering.

Well, like Hezzy said, getting in touch with Mental Health Services may prove to be beneficial. They may have connections to doctors and surgeons for people with physical ailments as well as mental. Maybe potential solutions that you wouldn't have access to otherwise. Look for professional help, Ray. Sometimes they're capable of doing a lot that we can't on our own or can help shove us in the right direction. I know it takes a lot to do so but it can help. It's worth the potential embarrassment, it really is.

[QUOTE=RayvenQ;48922947]I've pretty much tried everything possible. Nothings works, or at least to the point where they make things better rather than just change the precise nature of the physical suffering.[/QUOTE] So every doctor you've seen said no? And what kind of surgery would it be, if you don't mind me asking.

I just came into this thread after reading the OP and want to say this: When I was 15, I got a call telling me that someone I knew hanged himself with his belt because his ex was with someone else. He was found hanging from a tree at the place where he and his friends hanged out, drank and smoked cigarettes etc. If anyone close got a hold of him earlier, it would be possible to tell him that time heals everything. It didn't cause anything other than pain and suffering to his parents and everyone that he knew. He died at 15 because he felt unloved by a single person, but ignored everyone who cared about him in the process. I don't know how old you are or how long you've been together, but even when it seems like you're about to die from hurting, you have to understand that only time can heal these wounds. It will be a slow and painful process, and it probably won't be a long time before you're ready to start dating etc. again, but you will come out the better and stronger person in the end. [QUOTE=Sgt. Khorn;48923026]I think you guys are a bit too focused on one part of all this. Yeah, he's been emotionally hurt from his relationship, and he needs to recover from that. But the pain from his back is damaging him just as much. Feeling physical pain for years can get unbearable. He's hurt physically and emotionally.[/QUOTE] I apologize, I just typed my post after reading the OP, I didn't realize there were other factors involved.