How to Win an Argument on Facepunch: A Handy Guide by Noss™

[SgtTupelo]

Lots of people overusing the term "russophobia" seem to be using that lmao-style.

[Rangergxi]

[QUOTE=Zukriuchen;45486724]srs talk tho its silly when people disregard your arguments just because you're not writing properly

i've had people try to use "you're not even capitalizing your i's" as an actual argument[/QUOTE]

12 paragraphs of no capitalization and periods. This is pain.

[Rocâ„¢]

[QUOTE=code_gs;45475471]Make sure to throw an ad hominem in there by saying something such as:

[i]How can your opinion of ice cream have any credibility when you only have 50 posts, are a blue member, are a 2014'er, play Rust, and already have two bans?[/i]

Always remember, join date and post-count elitism.[/QUOTE]

And don't forget to call out the other user for backpedalling!

[Steamswitch]

Don't forget this as your ace when all other tactics have failed:

What the fuck did you just fucking say about me, you little bitch? I’ll have you know I graduated top of my class in the Navy Seals, and I’ve been involved in numerous secret raids on Al-Quaeda, and I have over 300 confirmed kills. I am trained in gorilla warfare and I’m the top sniper in the entire US armed forces. You are nothing to me but just another target. I will wipe you the fuck out with precision the likes of which has never been seen before on this Earth, mark my fucking words. You think you can get away with saying that shit to me over the Internet? Think again, fucker. As we speak I am contacting my secret network of spies across the USA and your IP is being traced right now so you better prepare for the storm, maggot. The storm that wipes out the pathetic little thing you call your life. You’re fucking dead, kid. I can be anywhere, anytime, and I can kill you in over seven hundred ways, and that’s just with my bare hands. Not only am I extensively trained in unarmed combat, but I have access to the entire arsenal of the United States Marine Corps and I will use it to its full extent to wipe your miserable ass off the face of the continent, you little shit. If only you could have known what unholy retribution your little “clever” comment was about to bring down upon you, maybe you would have held your fucking tongue. But you couldn’t, you didn’t, and now you’re paying the price, you goddamn idiot. I will shit fury all over you and you will drown in it. You’re fucking dead, kiddo.

[Thelurker1234]

[quote][IMG]https://yourlogicalfallacyis.com/assets/FallaciesPosterHigherRes.jpg[/IMG][/quote]

Remember to print this out and put it on your wall, if anyone uses any fallacy, scream about it.

[_jack]

[QUOTE=Reagy;45480265]u wot m8? i swer u are one cheky cunt m8, u won sai dat to me face and not online m8? we'll fokn see wat appns 2 u m8. i swer 2 christ I'll fokn deck u in the gabba. you betta shut yer mouth or im geetn me homebois rite now, preparin 4 a propa rumble. tha rumble thall make yer nan sore jus hearin bout it. yer in proper mess ya nob head.[/QUOTE]

[media]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eB5VXJXxnNU[/media]

every time i see people talking like a glaswegian Slim Shady it reminds me of this.

Ali G was doing "roight propah rumbles" in the 90's as a response to the rise of chav culture.

reagy

reagy

ya aint got no techmolology in ya house

[Blackha7]

[QUOTE=JPlus;45487187]lol man i'm part of anonymoose we got ur dox and ur bsns ur guna get hacked lmao[/QUOTE]

JPlus DOX
[img]http://i.imgur.com/nXaWqA3.png[/img]
Name: Jack Wedgwood
Date of Birth: December 28, 1997 (16)
City: London
Country: England
Email: [email][e-mail][/email]

:v:

[highlight](User was permabanned for this post ("Personal Info" - Craptasket))[/highlight]

[FS]

[QUOTE=Blackha7;45506529]JPlus DOX
[img]http://i.imgur.com/nXaWqA3.png[/img]
Name: Jack Wedgwood
Date of Birth: December 28, 1997 (16)
City: London
Country: England
Email: [email][e-mail][/email]

:v:[/QUOTE]

[IMG]http://i.imgur.com/KfvArKw.jpg[/IMG]

[highlight](User was permabanned for this post ("Quoting personal info / Gimmick" - Craptasket))[/highlight]

[JPlus]

[QUOTE=Blackha7;45506529]JPlus DOX
[IMG]http://i.imgur.com/nXaWqA3.png[/IMG]
Name: Jack -blanked-
Date of Birth: December 28, 1997 (16)
City: London
Country: England
Email: -blanked-

:v:

[highlight](User was permabanned for this post ("Personal Info" - Craptasket))[/highlight][/QUOTE]

Close but that's not my picture :p My face isn't on the internet, also all of that info is available either on my twitter or steam
also yorkshire tea wow lol standards much
2/10 didn't even try

EDIT: Also what did you hope to prove by posting my city? There's literally a post on this very forum where I was talking about how I was in green park

[highlight](User was banned for this post ("Quoting own personal details" - Craptasket))[/highlight]

[Killuah]

[QUOTE]When in doubt just quote the post you want to argue against and add[/QUOTE]

sources?

[FunnyGamer]

[QUOTE=thelurker1234;45502238]Remember to print this out and put it on your wall, if anyone uses any fallacy, scream about it.[/QUOTE]

But isn't that the fallacy fallacy?

Though since you are then protected by the fallacy fallacy, you're still the winner.

[Electrocuter]

Remember, when you eventually can't argue back because you're wrong and everyone has proven you wrong but you're too stubborn to accept it, just rate everyone against you dumb(if you haven't already been doing that through the course of the thread) and disappear from the thread like nothing ever happened, convinced that you're right and everyone else is stupid.

Then when another thread of a related topic shows up rinse and repeat.

Bonus points if you point out that you're going to sleep/eat/some other reason to leave the thread without looking like you lost the argument before disappearing.

Oh also remember to state that everyone counter-arguing you are just jumping in a bandwagon, because if there's more than one person disagreeing with you it's a bandwagon and therefore their arguments are invalid.

[Хум]

I personally don't like ice cream. I understand people like it but I don't see the appeal.

[megafat]

[QUOTE=HumbleTH;45508868]I personally don't like ice cream. I understand people like it but I don't see the appeal.[/QUOTE]

Jesus Christ Hitler, calm the fuck down.

[Ntzu]

remember if you want to seem like a 12 yr old trying to be serious

Type very properly and be sure to include dots, ok?... without the dots... it just isn't the same...............

Alternatively You Could Just Type And Captialize Every Word For Extra Internet Points

[Noss]

what the fuck happened here?

[AnonTakesOver]

[QUOTE=Noss;45510680]what the fuck happened here?[/QUOTE]

What did you expect?

[fritzel]

[QUOTE=ntzu;45510539]remember if you want to seem like a 12 yr old trying to be serious

Type very properly and be sure to include dots, ok?... without the dots... it just isn't the same...............

Alternatively You Could Just Type And Captialize Every Word For Extra Internet Points[/QUOTE]

use multiple question marks and exclamation marks to increase the effect manifold.

??????????????????

!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[mochisushi]

[QUOTE=fritzel;45512122]use multiple question marks and exclamation marks to increase the effect [B]manifold[/B].

??????????????????

!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!![/QUOTE]

manifold????? lmao

[JPlus]

[QUOTE=ntzu;45510539]Alternatively You Could Just Type And Captialize Every Word For Extra Internet Points[/QUOTE]

Remember That Jaden Smith Is Loved By Many People Just By Using This Easy Guide To Tweeting
But How Can Caps Be Real If Our Eyes Are Real

[.Lain]

the best way to look smart is to use semicolons for no particular reason in the middle of any given sentence

[CWalkthroughs]

[QUOTE=.Lain;45518111]the best way to look smart is to use semicolons for no particular reason in the middle of any given sentence[/QUOTE]

Give us; an example.

[Hervey]

[QUOTE=CWalkthroughs;45518231]Give us; an example.[/QUOTE]

Nah, you have to use it in place of a comma; that's the way you do it.

[StrawberryClock]

[QUOTE=Lonestriper;45484330]Compile a list of everyone who has voted you dumb and leave them passive-aggressive visitor messages on their profiles.[/QUOTE]

Oh fuck I do this sometimes, is that what my life amounts to now?

[editline]27th July 2014[/editline]

Also, remember to use the dumb rating instead of the disagree rating, because they must be stupid for not sharing your opinion!

[HiddenReptilian]

Here's a good example of a proper Facepunch argument, demonstrated by the late Radical Rebel.
[URL="http://facepunch.com/showthread.php?t=1412793&page=3"]http://facepunch.com/showthread.php?t=1412793&page=3[/URL]

[JPlus]

[QUOTE=Rantosaurus;45521214]Here's a good example of a proper Facepunch argument, demonstrated by the late Radical Rebel.
[URL="http://facepunch.com/showthread.php?t=1412793&page=3"]http://facepunch.com/showthread.php?t=1412793&page=3[/URL][/QUOTE]

This is a good example, using ad hominems to support your point, and making no sort of compromise with the opposing side. Unsure as to why this perfectly legitimate and contributing user was banned but, I guess the admins work in mysterious ways.

[Unkle Dada]

Remember to rate good arguments winner/zing and bad arguments dumb. Agree and disagree are for casuals.

[Noss]

[QUOTE=Rantosaurus;45521214]Here's a good example of a proper Facepunch argument, demonstrated by the late Radical Rebel.
[URL="http://facepunch.com/showthread.php?t=1412793&page=3"]http://facepunch.com/showthread.php?t=1412793&page=3[/URL][/QUOTE]

that entire thread is a cesspool

[StrawberryClock]

[QUOTE=UnknownDude;45522058]Remember to rate good arguments winner/zing and bad arguments dumb. Agree and disagree are for casuals.[/QUOTE]

geez do you think you know better than the rest of us lmao

[Lenny.]

7 posts to 1k, I feel like I will be able to win arguments soon