Think you've read bad fan fiction? Take a look at these. The Gutwrenching Fan Fic thread
264 replies, posted
[QUOTE=DANKA;20222683]
[URL]http://www.toplessrobot.com/2009/07/fan_fiction_friday_the_pokemon_story.php[/URL]
[/QUOTE]
What the hell O.O :vd:
[QUOTE=DANKA;20222683]
[url]http://www.toplessrobot.com/2009/07/fan_fiction_friday_the_pokemon_story.php[/url]
[/QUOTE]
I really, really wish I could say I've read worse.
[quote=http://xana-william.deviantart.com/art/Eevee-TF-TG-97356898]One day, a boy named Phil walked to a park. Phil walked into the park and felt thirsty, and like he doesn't need any clothes. Phil walked to the drink stand and bought a drink, which looked like root beer. he saw a pink Eevee walk up and say "you can't stand while you drink that, come with me to the bathroom" the pink Eevee said and started walking towards the womans restroom. Phil followed the pink Eevee and said "why are you pink? why is everyone pink?". The pink Eevee said "you'll find out soon" and walked into the bathroom, Phil walked in as a pink Eevee walked out bleeding from the pussy. Phil flinched and sat on a chair which was covered in pink Eevee fur. Phil didn't mind and took a sip of his drink, not noticing that the brown fluid was turning pink. the Pink Eevee said "my name is Sam. I guess your Phil". Phil nodded and felt something push out of his spine, he checked his spine to find a small bump at the base of it. Phil jumped up in suprise as Sam said "you don't have to worry, your going to be cute" and walked over to Phil's cock with a pair of gender change sissors. Phil freaked out a bit and took another sip as Sam put his penis through the hole in the sissors. Sam said "once I snip your penis off, you'll become completely a girl like me. well, not like me till you finish your drink off" and pressed on the sissors, Phil's penis falling to the floor. Phil flinched as his cock disappeared into a female clit, crying that he has a clit. Phil became completely a girl, tail growing a bit longer with pink fur growing on it. Phil gasped "I gotta get out of here" she said, finnishing her drink and running into a mirrored stall. Phil started shaking as her tail finished growing with pink fur and a light pink tail tip. "why did I have to walk into this park" she said, shaking as her legs reformed into the hind legs of an Eevee, her hips also reforming. Phil fell off the toilet and grabbed her Eevee hind legs. Phil screamed as she watched her hands and arms reform into the front legs and paws of an Eevee as pink fur engulfs her body, a light pink tuff of thick fur growing around her neck. Sam said "your almost done, if you need to pee. sit on the toilet made for Eevees" as Phil went over to the toilet and sat on it, letting her pee come out and down the toilet. Phil's head started reforming, gaining Eevee ears covered in pink fur and a small muzzle with sharp fangs. Phil said "looks like my human form.......is gone". THE END[/quote]
:wtc:
[QUOTE=Dank Dave;20223816]The pokemon one....[/QUOTE]
I almost cried manly tears.
What the fuck am I reading
[QUOTE=DANKA;20222683]I DONT EVEN WANT TO FUCKING TALK ABOUT THIS WHAT THE FUCK[/QUOTE]
I saw this and thought "Bloody hell, now I must read that".
[B][I]I regret that.[/I][/B] :geno: [I][B]Very, very much.[/B][/I]
And then John was a zombie.
[quote]The radio said "No Bella, you are the vampires."
And then Bella was a whore.[/quote]
Strangely, that was more interesting to read than the actual Twilight series. And just about as intellectually beneficial.
Nostalgia Critic / Angry Video Game Nerd slash:
[URL]http://www.fanfiction.net/s/4578896/1/A_Special_Truce_AVGN_vs_Nostalgia_Critic_Slash[/URL]
[QUOTE][B]A Special Truce[/B]
As the day came to an end, The Angry Video Game Nerd, James went back to his hotel room to retire for the rest of the day. He spend his whole stay at Comic Con, mingling with his fans and talking about shitty video games. The whole con should have been a blast but it wasn't for AVGN. His booth was right across from the Nostalgia Critic, his seemingly worst enemy. He was dogged with fans instigating a fight with him, a fight he didn't want to start. James was quite upset that NC wanted to fight him as well. See, the AVGN don't hate NC. In fact...he is madly in love with him. When he first saw NC, he fell in love with his unshaven look and his sexy glasses. His big, potty mouth gave him shivers down his spine every time he talks. So he was very hurt when he learned NC made an video calling him out.
"Why does he hate me?" James said as he plopped down on his bed.
James never knew he was gay until he meant That Guy with the Glasses. His sexual desires just bloomed and he have been attracted to men ever since. He is a virgin and he dreams of the day he might lost it to the Nostalgia Critic.
Then the AVGN sprang up from his bed, "Wait a minute! Why am i just laying here complaining? I need to know! I need to know why he hates me!" James got up and walked to NC's hotel room down the hall. He didn't understand. He was a nice guy, he had feelings. He never mean any harm when he insults people in his videos. He was just a random victim of the man he loves ever so deeply.
Silently, James knocked on the door. "Why am I doing this?" he thinks to himself, wondering if his knocks was loud enough to hear. Suddenly, he felt a hand on his shoulder from behind which scared the daylights out of him.
"What the fuck?!" he turned and saw the Nostalgia Critic himself. the AVGN's legs started to go weak as he stare into NC' s glasses. He couldn't help but grow an erection at his presents. He was just so manly.
"Well well, Mr. Angry Video Game Nerd. We meet again!" the man with glasses says while glaring into James's glasses.
"Nostalgia Critic, I want a word with you."
"Then come on in. You had a long day. Come inside for a beer." NC says while opening and walking inside on his hotel room.
The Nerd follows the Nostalgia and sits on his bed. "Got any Rolling Rock?"
"Of course!" Nostalgia Critic says while pulling out a beer in his suitcase.
James couldn't believe he was this close to NC with out confrontation. He started drinking his beer while Nostalgia Critic sat on his bed with James, watching the nerd.
"So...what did you want to talk to me about?"
James looked down and placed his beer on the floor. He didn't respond for a minute or two.
"Well, I was wondering what the deal with you disliking me. We never met before hand and you just decided to be a jerk to me."
The Nerd looked at NC and continued, " I am a big fan of yours, NC. I told you I was a big fan on my forum and you thought it was a secret message insulting you. Why do you want to fight me when I idolize you?"
Nostalgia Critic was silent for a while, "You really like me, don't you buttfucker?" He laughs but the AVGN was somewhat offended by this comment because he was homosexual. James hung his head low and NC placed his hand on his back. "You think I really hate you?"
James looked up quickly, "You don't"
"Of course not! I was just messing around. I like you very much, Nerd. You are awesome."
AVGN blushed and looked away. "Well, gee...I..."
"And you want to know a secret?"
"What secret?" the Nerd says baffled.
"I...am gay. And...I find you...attractive. In fact, I even...love you." Nostalgia Critic looked away with a huge blush on his face. James couldn't believe what he was hearing. Its like a dream come true. He met his love and his love loves him, too.
"R-r-really?"
Yes," Then the Nostalgia Critic leaned in and kissed James on the mouth. The kiss sent shivers down his spine and aroused him greatly. AVGN returned the kiss and they both started kissing passionately. The Nerd's head almost exploded of the unbelievability of this. He was kissing his lover and he loved it. They parted later, panting for air.
"I love you too, Nostalgia Critic" James says with powerful bedroom eyes.
"You don't know how much I wanted to hear that."
The Nostalgia Critic grabbed AVGN and slowly pulled him down on the bed while kissing him. His arms wondered up and down the Nerds scrawny chest as he grows more and more aroused. Slowly, Nostalgia Critic striped James shirt off and started licking his nipples. He teased around the nipples and then started sucking on the nerd's Milkdud colored tit.
"Ohhhhh, Nostalgia...don't stop."
The critic started to pull off James's pants and was shocked to find his Nightmare on Elm's Street boxes.
"Hehehe, I thought you hated this game? Heh heh heh!"
Nostalgia Critic slowly slit his hand down the Nerds boxers and grabbed his huge member and started to stroke it while kissing him. The rhythm started slow at first and slowly worked his way up until he was jerking him off violently. The AGVN was having the time of his life. NC was very good at this. He must have done this a million times before on other guys. The Nerd held his breath and was about to shoot when Nostalgia Critic stopped.
"What the fuck are you doing?" James said disappointed.
"I don't want you to come this yet. " Nostalgia Critic says evilly. He pulled off the Nerd's boxers and told him to sit on the edge of the bed, and he did. NC got on his knees and put James huge dick into his mouth. Nostalgia Critic was also a very good cocksucker. In less then a few minutes, He was ready to cum again when NC stopped.
"Dammit, stop doing that!" The Nerd was getting very frustrated.
"Shut up, slave. its time to see how your ass feels!" And with that, the Nostalgia Critic stripped off all his clothes and forced James to get on his hands and knees on the bed. NC crawled up there with him and split Nerd's small, flat pale ass and placed his cock between his cheeks. NC took his dick and slowly teased poor James asshole until he was moaning and begging NC to fuck him.
"Oooooo, baby, stop messing around and put it in already!" James said gripping the sheets.
"Beg for it." Nostalgia Critic said looking at the Nerd with lustful eyes.
"Please, put it in."
"I don't like your begging. Try harder."
"PLEASE, NOSTALGIA, FUCK ME!"
NC liked to hear his little sluts beg for his huge cock but he didn't hesitate to do what the Nerd wanted. NC spit on his dick so he won't get cock burned and slammed his dick in AVGN's tiny asshole.
"AHHHH, GOD!" The Nerd screams while enjoying the feel of the Nostalgia Critic's cock in his bum. NC spend no time pounding his huge cock in AVGN's ass. He was slamming his dick hard while listening to James moan and groan. Harder and harder, NC fucked until they were both sweaty. He liked how James screamed in pain when he knew he really liked it. The Angry Video Game Nerd was in total bliss. His dream of fucking the Nostalgia Critic finally came true. Oh, he can certainly die happy and this moment.
It seemed like forever but after a good 20 minutes of hardcore fucking, NC was ready to cum. And so was James. He slammed his cock in AVGN's ass one more time and let on a loud moan. James rouse his head up and ejaculated all over the bed sheets. Nostalgia Critic came so much, his jizz squirted around his dick and on the bed. They both fell back down on their own cum, panting. Then they started to cuddle.
"That was amazing, my love." Nostalgia Critic says kissing and nuzzling the Nerd.
"Oh...yes it was." James said, returning the affection.
They laid silent like this, basking in our own love and heat when AVGN broke the silents.
"Does this mean we have a truce?" He lifted his pinky up with a grin on his face.
Nostalgia Critic grabbed his pinky with his own and kissed him, "Truce".
[B]The End.[/B]
[/QUOTE]Here's a dramatic reading of it:
[URL]http://thatguywiththeglasses.com/bt/the-sage/fanfic-theatre/4835-episode-1-doug-and-james[/URL]
I also should mention that the author has also written some Bush/McCain slash (yeah, like we really want to see two very old guys doing it):
[URL]http://www.fanfiction.net/s/4587860/1/A_Meeting_Between_Friends[/URL]
[QUOTE=juhana;20302251]Nostalgia Critic / Angry Video Game Nerd slash:
[URL]http://www.fanfiction.net/s/4578896/1/A_Special_Truce_AVGN_vs_Nostalgia_Critic_Slash[/URL]
Here's a dramatic reading of it:
[URL]http://thatguywiththeglasses.com/bt/the-sage/fanfic-theatre/4835-episode-1-doug-and-james[/URL]
I also should mention that the author has also written some Bush/McCain slash (yeah, like we really want to see two very old guys doing it):
[URL]http://www.fanfiction.net/s/4587860/1/A_Meeting_Between_Friends[/URL][/QUOTE]
Sage actually read it? :psypop:
The pokemon one...:smithicide:
Disgusting rubbish
Oh dear god, the pokemon story...
Oh, oh dear god...
OH DEAR GOD, GOD DAMMIT WHAT THE FUCKING HELL FUCK YOU
Did you assholes have to quote those? I'm more traumatized by this than anyone could ever be by the Offended page on ED.
I sat with my mouth permanently agape while reading the second half of the Dry Bones one.
I never hated someone With the Passion I have against the writer of the Pokemon one
I was fucking roaring at the pokemon story, whats your guys' problem?
stfu b4 i stick it in yo pokevagina
[QUOTE=Triumph Forks;20308775]I was fucking roaring at the pokemon story, whats your guys' problem?[/QUOTE]
That's because you're too far off the deep end to be affected by it. Don't worry though, we'll probably be joining you there soon.
all fan fiction is bad and both its authors and intended audience are human trash
I think doctor c should post the stories he wrote in the goldmembers forum
[quote]He plunged his rock hard cock deep inside of her anus. It was white hot.[/quote]
:frown:
[QUOTE=Reaver1991;20308811]stfu b4 i stick it in yo pokevagina[/QUOTE]Fuck me, daddy
I read that pokemon story last summer. Words cannot describe how I felt afterward.
But I remember a few years back reading some horrendous star fox fan-fic where some character had their character derailed (It was said that some character became a porn star :psyduck:) and was apparently tortured grotesquely, but I never finished it because it was so disgusting. I only got to chapter 4 before chickening out. It was so terrible that half of the fiction was the author saying in italics "Its disgusting, don't send hate mail plz". I can't find it nowadays, but trust me, it was the worst thing I ever read.
Now I'm addicted to Hans Von Hozel.
I posted the first part, now here is the second.
[b]Darkening Dusk - A Twilight Fanfiction: [/b]
Chapter two - This Is How You Remind Me
[quote]Edward was decamped, the discomfort was abhorrent! I wept and I wept little tears of tear liquid from my eyeballs. My husband had marooned me for two hours! Those tears trickled down my face and leaked into my gaping mouth that hung wide like a trout preparing to ingest a lone mayfly on the surface of a lake s water. That salty taste reached my tongue and I was filled with warmth and adoration. I was instantly reminded of Edward s jizzum that I had just consumed previously. Suddenly, A spark of hope flickered through my brain; I could feel a nice lump of phlegm had gathered in the back of my throat forming a sticky safety net for anything precious which may dive down my mouth hole! I still had some precious pre-Renesmoo clogging my windpipe to remember him by!
I must feel it! I need to hold my husband s man-milk!
Poking gently with my finger, I attempted to cough up this phlegm. It gurgled and stuck to the interior of my throat, spreading thinly and coating the pink slimy surfaces in a thick layer of man-goo, toast crumbs, traces of butter and regular phlegm. This was going to be tougher than I thought. Sucking in as much air as I could, I heaved as strongly as I could, trying to power my throat muscles into bringing up this slippery treasure. The tears that were still slithering down my throat softened the phlegm making my task easier. I gagged, my eyeballs bulging in their sockets as I inserted a finger down my throat as if I were inserting it into Edward s anus. It explored my slime covered interior flesh, scooping the lining of my throat for any precious Edward deposit that I could reach. Sadly, my fingers were not quite right for the task.
I ran into the kitchen, snotty mucus began trickling down my throat and mingling with the already gathered phlegm. Some of it was bouncing off my lower lip and and slopping onto the floor with a delightful squelch. It was like the great snottites of Mexico s Cueva de Villa Lulz, colonies of bacteria with that gluey and slimy consistency were forming from my nostrils like a cave s stalactites. In the cutlery draw I grabbed a teaspoon. It was a haut couture teaspoon that I had received as a wedding gift from Alice. It was black with small geometric shapes cut out of the handle. It slipped into my mouth almost as smoothly as Edward s sex-pupa. I wretched, heaving onto the floor as that little fashionable spoon shoveled out the contents of my windpipe. Soon my kitchen floor was covered in beige toasty phlegm with traces of glitter mixed in. I ran my fingers through it with glee and laughed hysterical tears of joy!
In situ on the kitchen floor I gingerly frolicked with my Edward s lucky panties that I had pulled out from the laundry basket. Have you In situ on the kitchen floor I gingerly frolicked with my Edward s lucky panties that I had pulled out from the laundry basket. Have you ever seen a fine pair of herculean buttocks hanging out from a baby pink thong that has tease written on the front in swirly purple font? Imagine it seriously, imagine it. Imagine him grinding those fine alabaster butt cheeks into your nose. He might flick that tight little asshole upwards a few times; you can see some dark red hairs creeping out from beneath the thong strap like trapped spiders flailing their legs in a futile attempt to escape. Picture his balls slapping gently onto your chin as he flicks those tight buttocks. They re fuzzy and scratch a bit with an ecstatic itching.
Tenderly stroking the skidmark that had been left on his thong strap after a bad bout of diarrhea (and licking it a little) I just realized that I could not go on without him any longer! That was it! I must venture to the supermarket and show Edward my love by killing myself and stopping this pain I feel every time we are torn apart by the cruel twists of life! I cursed the empty milk bottle for snatching my darling husband from my warm embrace into the cold and unwelcoming depths of Aldi! Groping my phone I called Jacob to come and watch Renessmoo unattended in my house with her wearing a rather sexy looking baby vest I might add, it showed off her feminine curves delightfuly! Squee! I wept tears of tearjuice once more as I ventured outside.
An old man asked me if I was ok upon seeing my distress. I spat at him, then kicked him in the nuttsack. Dirty regular humans have no right to talk to me and it was quite obvious that he was going to follow me around like an adoring puppydog giving me all that unwanted attention. I hoped he wasn't going to try and ask me out to his retirement home's prom either. Nobody could steal me from my Edward. With the taste of his sparkling Eddy-juice still lingering on my lips...I left the old man curled up on the floor prepared to prove my love![/quote]
[url]http://cogsdev.110mb.com/cwcipedia/index.php/Sonichu_Comic_Collection[/url]
I'm sorry I have exposed you to this terrible series.
I read a pretty terrible fanfic about how the Arbiter got it on with Miranda Keyes. Can't find the link...
Holy fuck the pokemon one jesus oh god im scared for life sweet holy shit fuck
Oh hey, I remember this thread. I'm going to say this: "Awesome job, bumper."
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