[QUOTE=Encryption;27309749]ITT: General Facepunch demographic says "lul give him everything he wants to avoid a fight :downs:"[/QUOTE]
OK Mr Internet Hardarse.
Good luck fighting off some violent criminals and dying young.
[QUOTE=SamRinny;27309720]You get in a fight and the first thing you think is to bite the fucker's ear off?[/QUOTE]
That'd be a tricky move to be honest. You'd have to get up close to the enemy, meaning he could easily grab hold of you and toss you to the ground, where you would be very vulnerable should he sit on you.
[QUOTE=Encryption;27309749]ITT: General Facepunch demographic says "lul give him everything he wants to avoid a fight :downs:"[/QUOTE]
Pretty much. Or you could like risk your life for no real reason, and possibly get killed, right?
Here's how you do it:
Option 1) Cover your face with your hand, and make sure your elbow is facing straight ahead. Then, stick your other arm through the "hole" behind your forearm, make a fist, and flail with it. Your attacker will be like "What the fuck is this guy doing? He must be fuckin' crazy" and run off. Congratulations! You have succeeded in fending off your attacker.
Option 2) Scream as loud as you can for about 10 seconds. Immediately after you finish screaming, drop your pants. Then, shit on the ground right in front of your attacker and resume screaming. He will react the same to this as he did to Option 1, and you will have won that encounter. Congratulations! You have succeeded in fending off your attacker.
[QUOTE=Encryption;27309749]ITT: General Facepunch demographic says "lul give him everything he wants to avoid a fight :downs:"[/QUOTE]
Probably because the general Facepuncher is a scrawny nerd who couldn't win a one-on-one fight with a shotgun.
Rape whistle
protip: no matter how good you think you can fight, if they have a knife, run away.
I know it was in the OP but it's important.
I found the OP quite interesting. I have never been in a fight even at school before, probably due to my height - only 6ft but most chavs here are pretty short. :v:
Thanks though OP, I'll try and keep that stuff in mind if I am ever out late or something and someone tries to harm me for whatever reason. I liked the idea of the hands out with the dominant hand more outwards, cheers.
Though in certain circumstances, a guy can be killed from a punch to the nose, this includes my dad. However the probability of finding someone else with my dad's injury is probably pretty low.
Very interesting. I will keep all this in mind (Hopefully)
[QUOTE=Andaeeee;27309677]What if he comes at you with a pointed stick?[/QUOTE]
If you're not sure how to counter it without possibly getting jabbed in the gut, do what he says. It also kind of boils down to how long/sharp it is. If it's a tiny branch that could only give you a flesh wound it'd obviously be way safer than a long spear.
[editline]montypythonreference[/editline]
Oh god I completely missed the reference.
[QUOTE=Murkat;27309859]That'd be a tricky move to be honest. You'd have to get up close to the enemy, meaning he could easily grab hold of you and toss you to the ground, where you would be very vulnerable should he sit on you.[/QUOTE]
Exactly. Just imagine biting someone's ear off anyway. You'd feel like you're trying to chew through hairy warm slightly sweaty jello.
[QUOTE=Ali Legend;27309638]So you would risk your life for the $40 in your wallet?[/QUOTE]
I currently have 100 quid in my wallet.
I dunno bout you, but I'm a student, that is my life blood for a month.
[QUOTE=Murkat;27309890]Probably because the general Facepuncher is a scrawny nerd who couldn't win a one-on-one fight with a shotgun.[/QUOTE]
proposterous
If i would get into a fight, i would smash the fucking skull! :v:
[QUOTE=bravehat;27310198]I currently have 100 quid in my wallet.
I dunno bout you, but I'm a student, that is my life blood for a month.[/QUOTE]
And fighting the hypothetical mugger means you might lose your literal life blood.
[QUOTE=Aman V;27309699]
[editline]9th January 2011[/editline]
Lol Europe you so...shitty.[/QUOTE]
I'm actually pretty glad guns are illegal here. The rules on guns are really strict, but atleast I can go outside and not worry about people having guns with them. Crimes involving a gun is also pretty rare here.
[editline]9th January 2011[/editline]
[QUOTE=SamRinny;27310192]Exactly. Just imagine biting someone's ear off anyway. You'd feel like you're trying to chew through hairy warm slightly sweaty jello.[/QUOTE]
I agree on it not being the best move, but it's more for if you have the chance to do it, you should.
[editline]9th January 2011[/editline]
[QUOTE=bravehat;27310198]I currently have 100 quid in my wallet.
I dunno bout you, but I'm a student, that is my life blood for a month.[/QUOTE]
Then don't carry that much money?
[QUOTE=Encryption;27309749]ITT: General Facepunch demographic says "lul give him everything he wants to avoid a fight :downs:"[/QUOTE]
Oh you're going to have a blast getting mugged, and by blast I mean they're going to blast you full of lead. If some guy in a dark alley says "Give me your wallet" and you try to punch him or something equally stupid 9 times out of 10 he's going to shoot you. The 1/10 chance is that he's just going to stab you instead.
In life threatening situations you fight dirty.
[QUOTE=SamRinny;27310192]Exactly. Just imagine biting someone's ear off anyway. You'd feel like you're trying to chew through hairy warm slightly sweaty jello.[/QUOTE]
That's why you don't chew.
Think about it, Your teeth slice through meat like a knife through butter, an ear ain't got no chance, only thing stopping you from doing it is your brain gets signals saying "Yo holmes this is some bitches ear you be gnawing on n shyeet we should stop" all you gotta do is decide you don't like the person and your brains all like "Fuck yeah we're gonna rip this bitch apart like a chavs pitbull terrier rips apart kids!!!" :pcgaming:
[QUOTE=BrQ;27309649]Illegal in most places in Europe.[/QUOTE]
Well since I'm in the US where in certain States it is legal to carry a concealed weapon with a permit, this does not apply to me.
[QUOTE=OutOfExile2;27310298]Oh you're going to have a blast getting mugged, and by blast I mean they're going to blast you full of lead. If some guy in a dark alley says "Give me your wallet" and you try to punch him or something equally stupid 9 times out of 10 he's going to shoot you. The 1/10 chance is that he's just going to stab you instead.[/QUOTE]
Here's a question.
Why the fuck is he in a dark alley in the first place?
See that's never explained in these scenarios and it really pisses me off, it's like saying there's no fire extinguisher in my house and saying "Oh well I bet if you were in a volcano you'd wish you had one to keep the fires off you"
It's barely fucking relevant and an incredibly unlikely scenario that you construct with the sole purpose of serving your point and it's not likely to happen.
[QUOTE=space1;27310391]Well since I'm in the US where in certain States it is legal to carry a concealed weapon with a permit, this does not apply to me.[/QUOTE]
Probably. Some basic self defense can't hurt though.
[QUOTE=bravehat;27310348]That's why you don't chew.
Think about it, Your teeth slice through meat like a knife through butter, an ear ain't got no chance, only thing stopping you from doing it is your brain gets signals saying "Yo holmes this is some bitches ear you be gnawing on n shyeet we should stop" all you gotta do is decide you don't like the person and your brains all like "Fuck yeah we're gonna rip this bitch apart like a chavs pitbull terrier rips apart kids!!!" :pcgaming:[/QUOTE]
I would say unless you're Mike Tyson biting someone's ear probably isn't the best course of action.
[QUOTE=bravehat;27310411]Here's a question.
Why the fuck is he in a dark alley in the first place?
See that's never explained in these scenarios and it really pisses me off, it's like saying there's no fire extinguisher in my house and saying "Oh well I bet if you were in a volcano you'd wish you had one to keep the fires off you"
It's barely fucking relevant and an incredibly unlikely scenario that you construct with the sole purpose of serving your point and it's not likely to happen.[/QUOTE]
Of course it's unlikely. The point of having a fire extinguisher is for the case a little fire breaks out. No one says it's going to happen, but it might happen and when that time comes, you better be prepared for it.
A dark alley scenario is also not unrealistic. Sure, people avoid them, but sometimes it can be a great shortcut. It also doesn't have to be a dark alley. It can also happen on the street, or when you walk out of a place or something.
[QUOTE=Andaeeee;27309677]What if he comes at you with a pointed stick?[/QUOTE]
[B]OH GETTING ALL HIGH AND MIGHTY?
FRESH FRUIT NOT GOOD ENOUGH FOR YOU?[/B]
[img]http://img833.imageshack.us/img833/4122/151820bananal.jpg[/img]
or you can whip your dick out and jizz on the aggressor
[QUOTE=killover;27309483]what is the best martial arts[/QUOTE]
From my experience, Judo. Mainly because I only practiced this.
Anyway, if you're strong and quick enough, you can get your opponent to the ground in no-time, then deal with shit there further on, for example break his arm or leg when you apply enough force.
[QUOTE=Toasticle;27310713]or you can whip your dick out and jizz on the aggressor[/QUOTE]
He'd probably cut it off, kick you in the testicles and steal your wallet.
Seriously, don't try to disarm people.
I've been doing martial arts for 9 years now and I still don't really know how to disarm people.
If you absolutely have to, wrap your arm around their arm and twist, if they aren't trained they should loosen their grip.
[QUOTE=NorthernFall;27309525]If you've got someone pinned say on the ground or a lock and they really can't get out of it but are still mad as fuck, what do you do? If you let go, they're just going to go on the offensive again, but you can't walk around attacthed to them forever.[/QUOTE]
Yeah, one time my brother was being a dick and attacking me so I got him in a head lock, and when I let go of him he punched my in the mouth.
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