Why be happy? ("Happiness is a moral obligation"). - General

I don't get why "depressed" people are so damn aggressive when it comes to things like these. Like, the original message was simple and direct enough, and had no ill intent behind it. Why does everyone have be so repulsive? I think it's more unhealthy to assume that depression has some underlying super secret cause beyond just what a person thinks and how he thinks(besides the rare cases involving biological factors). Every single time someone pops up on FP, saying something like, "I had depression and I got over it this way", everyone just aggressively jumps on that person and basically just invalidates his depression. Does depression even have a defined threshold ? How much negative emotions must one feel in order to be considered "depressed"? They are just saying that a common trait between people who claim to be or who are depressed is that they tend to ruminate excessively, and I think it's a good piece of advice to get rid of that behavior. I'm not saying it's simple, as depression can be caused by many different reasons and may be riddled with many many layers in a complex manner. I'm not saying that. It's just that I believe that it would be a step in the right direction.

[QUOTE=GisG56;50470611]Well, complaining about it on here certainly doesn't do any good for yourself. Yes. I never said that being depressed is immoral though. Morally obligated to be happy- like the guy in the video said, having control over your emotions. I seriously cannot be bothered to fight my case anymore (it's boring), I've said all I want to say. Have fun everyone.[/QUOTE] Yeah, see ya man. I can only hope you can consider what I say when you approach depressed people. Sometimes, complaining about things does provide some use. Sure, when someone decides that they're going to post every day in the Shit That Gets You Mad thread, that's a problem, but talking to others about the problems that are bothering them can actually be a method of dealing with the problem. I'm the kind of guy that wants shit taken care of ASAP. No fucking around. No "I'll deal with the problem later." I want to process the situation in my head and talk it over with others if necessary. And that does sometimes require some complaining. Some people need their vent. I think it's far more selfish for people to say, "I don't like going on the internet and see people complaining." "Hey, you'd be better off just not telling me what's bothering you. I don't want the sanctity of my happiness to be hindered by your chosen emotion, man." "Just get off the internet you sad person." They're applicable in a few situations, but not this one and not in some of the threads on this forum, like the Depression thread. [editline]7th June 2016[/editline] [QUOTE=Rainboo;50470622]I don't get why "depressed" people are so damn aggressive when it comes to things like these. Like, the original message was simple and direct enough, and had no ill intent behind it. Why does everyone have be so repulsive? I think it's more unhealthy to assume that depression has some underlying super secret cause beyond just what a person thinks and how he thinks(besides the rare cases involving biological factors). Every single time someone pops up on FP, saying something like, "I had depression and I got over it this way", everyone just aggressively jumps on that person and basically just invalidates his depression. Does depression even have a defined threshold ? How much negative emotions must one feel in order to be considered "depressed"? They are just saying that a common aspect of people who claim to be or who are depressed is that they tend to ruminate excessively, and I think it's a good piece of advice to get rid of that behavior.[/QUOTE] I never watched the original video, and probably won't. I've merely responded to claims made in the thread. Please don't take what I've said as aggression in response to the video, or in general.

Whilst sure, putting on a happy facade is going to make other people around you feel better, you have to consider whether it's actually going to be a good thing for you personally. There's [URL="www.jpsychores.com/article/S0022-3999%2813%2900303-6/abstract"]evidence[/URL] to suggest that doing so can negatively affect your [I]physical[/I] health. Personally I'd place avoiding that as a moral priority over temporarily bringing down someone else's mood.

The whole concept of everyone having the social obligation to act happy even if you aren't, is totally fucked up. That's why Robin Williams killed himself. Because he acted "Happy" as a comedian, and was so good at hiding his depression, that everybody thought he was fine.

[QUOTE=Samson0722;50477818]The whole concept of everyone having the social obligation to act happy even if you aren't, is totally fucked up. That's why Robin Williams killed himself. Because he acted "Happy" as a comedian, and was so good at hiding his depression, that everybody thought he was fine.[/QUOTE] I think you should take yourself off your pedastool, and stop assuming that you know EXACTLY why someone took their life when you do not even know them. Media coverage is never accurate in reporting these sorts of events for celebrities. I am not going to discuss this too much as I feel that it is not my business to discuss the death of a much loved figure, and his poor family have probably dealt with enough of the public ruminating as it is. However, you have to consider he was suffering from Parkinsons/Lewys-body dementia, and suicide can be very common with people who suffer from this, it is a difficult thing to live with. He was a very respectable man, and I am pretty sure he does not want to be remembered for his illness'/taking his own life. Have some respect. That aside, he probably was happy being a comedian, just like someone could be happy with any aspect with their life. Doesn't mean they are happy overall though. Everyone has nooks and crannies in their life that causes them to not be happy overall or even depressed. Just because they have depression, doesn't mean that some things cannot make them feel a bit better, and distract them from their depressive thoughts and feelings. Like I said before, this video is highlighting the importance of being considerate of others around you, even if you feel like shit. It is about taking responsibility for your own actions, and it actually reminds people with depression that they have power, and gives encouragement that they are in fact in control, even if they think they are not, instead of saying "Hey, it's okay, you're not in control of this" - by saying they aren't in control makes them worse, and does not help them to get better and take control over their own mind. Highlighting that they have the choice and power of taking responsibility is in fact a part of Cognitive Behavioural Therapy (CBT) which is actually one of the most effective methods of beating the illness. I didn't post this video in direct relation to depression, I posted it as a general positive message to everybody. When someone brought it up in relation to depression, I suggested that it would probably be of particularly good use to someone who struggles from it because they could apply it, and encourage them to get themselves better. As Rainboo also stated a few posts back, I don't know why people feel the need to get so aggressive, my intention was to spread a simple positive message (and if you wanted to relate it to depression, it is actually useful).

[QUOTE=Melnek;50470414]yes i fucking had depression. i dont parade it around like some special snowflake and how "nobody understands the severity of it" and it has nothing to do with the discussion you can ask yourself the same questions that a psychotherapist may ask you -- they're not some divine being that asks unfathomable riddles that magically cure you of depression when you start thinking about them. they're just there to ask you how you're feeling. that's it. you can ask yourself the same and how honest you will be depends, again, on oneself. and depression never directly causes severe disrupted brain chemistry. it causes mild to low disrupted brain chemistry that almost has no effect on the person whatsoever. the main factor and the most detrimental one remains the persons conscious attitude towards his situation. our brain chemistry changes all the time fucking daily. it changes when we eat something we like, see something we like, or experience something good or bad. so don't try to play the "its not out fault, its the chemicals in our brain" card that, btw, heavy smokers also use to absolve them of their addiction. (and the same one i like to use also but whatever) you are severely undervaluing logicality and a persons ability to rationalize his thoughts, there are extreme cases of course, where a person has been distressed and depressed for the past few decades and self treatment is almost a monumental task by that point -- but for the majority of 20 something year olds and teenagers that frequent this forum, i assure you severe depression almost never exists. severe depression is something you develop down the line along the years, and not something you get when you're mistreated by schoolmates or dont know what to do after college or university or lack of a purpose or have some babbys first existential crisis.[/QUOTE] It irks me that so many people confuse depression with grieving. In response to the video: I definitely agree, in certain contexts. [B]I'm talking about people who are upset because they've had an argument with their wife or been drenched by a car passing through a puddle or had a bad day at work:[/B] If you're in a bad mood for no good reason and you walk into the room, you bring everyone else down. Don't pass your misery on to other people who have nothing to do with the situation. Stop being a moody git, it's not fair on anyone else. I lived with a housemate for a few months. Most of the time he'd be neutral, but sometimes he'd come home all grumpy, even before I properly knew him. Usually because he had an unproductive day or something equally meaningless. Every time he did, it'd make everyone else feel glum. With minor things, bottle them up and deal with them in your own time, or with someone appropriate who you can confide in. Don't just be rude to the cashier because you stepped in a puddle on your way to the shop.

Well, sure being happy is not a moral obligation, yet i think it's an obligation to try to get out of this depressed mindset for the sake of yourself and people you care about. Like, i'm totally familiar with how it feels when you can't even get up from your bed to cook some shit and eat it, yet eventually i always come to the point where i understand that it's simply meaningless to continue acting like some helpless weak idiot, that it's just miserable and won't make the situation any better. This logic always helps me to fight that stone of emotions dragging me to the bottom, not sure if it will work for anyone though, as i just hate being miserable, and understanding that i'm turining into one of those whining guys i despise so much helps me to move forward.

why does this shitty channel keep getting posted here

[QUOTE=antianan;50479322]Well, sure being happy is not a moral obligation, yet i think it's an obligation to try to get out of this depressed mindset for the sake of yourself and people you care about. Like, i'm totally familiar with how it feels when you can't even get up from your bed to cook some shit and eat it, yet eventually i always come to the point where i understand that it's simply meaningless to continue acting like some helpless weak idiot, that it's just miserable and won't make the situation any better. This logic always helps me to fight that stone of emotions dragging me to the bottom, not sure if it will work for anyone though, as i just hate being miserable, and understanding that i'm turining into one of those whining guys i despise so much helps me to move forward.[/QUOTE] I disagree. You shouldn't be in the mindset of, "I'm still alive so my death doesn't hurt others" or "I have to stay put together for others". You've gotta maintain a healthy amount of selfishness. You've gotta rethink the world around you so that you're living [I]because[/I] you enjoy others. The idea that your life and happiness is a moral obligation is very weird.

[QUOTE=Mining Bill;50479495]why does this shitty channel keep getting posted here[/QUOTE] Because all the wingnuts on FP have a hardon for literal conservative propaganda

[QUOTE=Rusty100;50470466]GisG56 watched a bunch of conservative videos on youtube and now hes an expert in depression[/QUOTE] Depression is caused by Syrian refugees thank you GisG56

Alright guys. Of Course anybody that's depressed doesn't want to be depressed. They don't want to be. It feels absolutely terrible and makes life just completely suck. You don't want to do or feel anything because the depression continues on. It's a sickness and if you're sick you can't care for others. It's not selfish. There's no change in your life while you're depressed so you're stagnantly living, or slowly dying. Depression also can be easily hidden. You might never know someone is depressed and they can seem to be very much happy. Being obligated to be happy is a strange mindset where people have to output a positive energy at all times. People generally enjoy to soak themselves in their own thoughts or the thoughts of others. That doesn't always include happiness and it's good enough. Happiness is a goal. Everyone wants to be happy. It's not something that can be forced, sold, or performed at all times. It's to be enjoyed at the time. Other emotions are important also. The true destination is growth. The development of you. All emotions help with that. They give you signs on where you need change. They generate change in your life to direct you to better living. If you're obligated to do anything, it's to change, for yourself, because with change comes a wider variety of life and more growth. And with your growth you allow yourself to share it to others which can simply help them also find their path to growth. Even your success or failure can indirectly affect others to grow. It's all a learning process. It's not just about happiness. It's about wisdom.

Happiness is just so important, and a lot of the time, if you're not happy yourself, then you will struggle to bring positivity to someone elses life. I think people get so caught up in trying to impress others, or make others happy, that they actually end up doing that injustice, and hurt more people than intended because they aren't looking after themselves, and making sure that they are in a positive, secure place beforehand. Whilst it is important that we are compassionate, show empathy, supportive, honest, loyal, and bring positiveness to people we love lives, it is crucial to not forget about yourself, and to take care of yourself too. [highlight](User was banned for this post ("Dumb bump" - Novangel))[/highlight]