Well Autumn, how can you explain the hundreds of people who are now married/together because they met online? It's not like they all instantly met on first contact, I bet due to money/family/sexuality, most of them could not meet right away.
which was my point...
so i'm not quite why you managed to come across as an ass and felt the need to try and tell me that my opinion on the subject is not valid. oh well!
[editline]17th December 2011[/editline]
[QUOTE=~Myst;33766650]Well Autumn, how can you explain the hundreds of people who are now married/together because they met online? It's not like they all instantly met on first contact, I bet due to money/family/sexuality, most of them could not meet right away.[/QUOTE]
because eventually, they have met.
what i'm saying is that i do not believe that two people that have never met can claim to be in love.
Can't imagine one remaining abstinent for extended long distance relations
[QUOTE=Autumn;33766656]
because eventually, they have met.
what i'm saying is that i do not believe that two people that have never met can claim to be in love.[/QUOTE]
Well if they eventually met then their long distance relationship more or less worked out, did it not? It's not like the relationship doesn't start until physical contact.
but just now you've said that you "couldnt be more in love" and that you "can tell its meant to be"
and you've never met. if you'd met, even just the once, then i'd be more inclined to believe you. as it stands though, i don't think it's true.
I don't believe in long distance relationships unless you have actually met.
You know my story.
[QUOTE=Autumn;33766656]which was my point...
so i'm not quite why you managed to come across as an ass and felt the need to try and tell me that my opinion on the subject is not valid. oh well!
[editline]17th December 2011[/editline]
because eventually, they have met.
what i'm saying is that i do not believe that two people that have never met can claim to be in love.[/QUOTE]
But now you're back to saying the emotions I felt during the first 7 months of my relationship are fake though. I have been in more "less-loving" relationships that meant half of what the (Long distance) months of my current one did. I think the feelings are genuinely the same thing (again, speaking about the "mature" couples) but I just think if they don't meet eventually, they won't be able to sustain their feelings due to being deprived of basic perks of being in a couple. (yes, the physicality)
Clarification: I think they can claim to be in love during the "planning to meet" stage of it, but their feelings will eventually go away/can't sustain it. Think of it this way: if you met your dream partner, you still love them if you're talking to them on the phone and texting/facebook. But if that's all you do, you couldn't possibly be or STAY happy/satisfied. But initially it's just like any relationship, and it's very real. (if it feels any different you're a crap couple)
[QUOTE=FPtje;33766859]I don't believe in long distance relationships unless you have actually met.
You know my story.[/QUOTE]
In majority of "e-date" situations, people meet at the same time they're moving in with each other. It's not really "long distance" anymore is it
[QUOTE=Stick it in her pooper;33766860]
In majority of situations, people meet at the same time they're moving in with each other. It's not really "long distance" anymore is it[/QUOTE]
If it's not long distance anymore then it's not within the scope of this thread anymore.
A long distance relationship ends when people meet. A normal relationship starts instead. If they move away again, well then at least they met.
[QUOTE=FPtje;33766902]If it's not long distance anymore then it's not within the scope of this thread anymore.[/QUOTE]
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[B]edit:[/B] caught you mid-edit
My friend ( and yes, my actual friend, not me ) has been dating a girl he met online for about 3 years, so yeah I think it's possible.
They met in real life this year during the summer, however. Eventually you'll have to actually meet up in person like autumn said.
From experience, I believe that you don't necessarily [I]need[/I] to meet someone in person ASAP in order to be in love with them. You can learn an awful lot about a person through text alone, and there's little stopping people from using Skype, or making international phone-calls to bridge the gap somewhat. But yes, physical visits need to happen (the same way "regular" couples need to test the waters before outright moving in together), and eventually one will have to move closer if the relationship is to have a chance of surviving.
I've been in my current long-distance relationship for two years now, going on three in April. I was able to visit Minnesota last year and the year before, but money woes thwarted my chances of visiting again this year. But we're in constant contact with each other, and we do our best to be honest. I think that being able to talk about problems and concerns is what keeps a long distance relationship healthy. Same with trying to do things together, despite the distance. (working on creative projects, gaming, watching movies/MST3K, etc)
Internet relationships are often emotional roller coasters. They are often very intense. During the online relationship you build an image of the other person with the limited knowledge that you have about them. Since you have feelings for that person, the image in your mind will be way better than it is in reality.
Do you know how easy it is to manipulate someone in an internet relationship? Have you heard the many stories of people getting other people to buy them games through internet relationships?
I've heard many of those stories.
[editline]17th December 2011[/editline]
[QUOTE=3noneTwo;33767035]From experience, I believe that you don't necessarily [I]need[/I] to meet someone in person ASAP in order to be in love with them. You can learn an awful lot about a person through text alone, and there's little stopping people from using Skype, or making international phone-calls to bridge the gap somewhat. But yes, physical visits need to happen (the same way "regular" couples need to test the waters before outright moving in together), and eventually one will have to move closer if the relationship is to have a chance of surviving.
I've been in my current long-distance relationship for two years now, going on three in April. I was able to visit Minnesota last year and the year before, but money woes thwarted my chances of visiting again this year. But we're in constant contact with each other, and we do our best to be honest. I think that being able to talk about problems and concerns is what keeps a long distance relationship healthy. Same with trying to do things together, despite the distance. (working on creative projects, gaming, watching movies/MST3K, etc)[/QUOTE]
Once you've met, you can be sure of the other person's identity, and the situation will improve loads. Even if you've just met once or twice in total over a long time period.
It works if you're both independent and very understanding people willing to make sacrifices to see each other
Definitely, I'm in one now. She lives up in Yorkshire and I live down south in Basingstoke, we've met up together once in the year and a bit we've been together and it's still going strong. As long as you love each other it doesn't really make a difference.
Also met my girlfriend on the Zombie Master HL2 mod, go figure.
[QUOTE=FPtje;33767071]Internet relationships are often emotional roller coasters. They are often very intense. During the online relationship you build an image of the other person with the limited knowledge that you have about them. Since you have feelings for that person, the image in your mind will be way better than it is in reality.
Do you know how easy it is to manipulate someone in an internet relationship? Have you heard the many stories of people getting other people to buy them games through internet relationships?
I've heard many of those stories.
[/QUOTE]
Oh trust me, it certainly is a roller-coaster, but it just bothers me when people just say "oh they're not really in love/that relationship will never last" as soon as they hear of it, because I could say the same thing about 90% of teen relationships these days. Just because it's unconventional people feel the need to assert their unwanted cynicism.
I guess I got way lucky, but I was confident that a girl from Estonia that didn't have access to their own computer at home yet wouldn't later try to seduce me into buying her games on steam, so I didn't really question her legitimacy or her identity. Buying things was never even brought up until Christmas/my birthday, she was the spender. It all worked out in the end, but yeah I have heard many crazy stories, while I was still planning my trip, two of our (adult) German friends who were living separated for months (in a relationship) finally met up -- later moved in and now they have a baby together.
I've also seen girls play guys on the internet just for rebound reasons or as an emotional punching bag just to leave them one day out of nowhere because they were desperate and found someone IRL despite saying she loved the online partner.
I actually met my boyfriend here on facepunch of all places, we're both from different countries (I'm from England, he's from Denmark). We live together now, have done for ten months and been together over three years now.
So yeah, it can work out, it's not easy and you have to make sure you make time to see eachother as much as you can but it can be done.
They can work. I was with a girl from 14-16, broke up not because of the distance but because I knew she liked someone else so left her. I only got to see her one week a month because we couldn't drive. But when we did see each other, lots of great anticipation sex.
[QUOTE=JustExtreme;33767188]It works if you're both independent and very understanding people willing to make sacrifices to see each other[/QUOTE]
Pretty much this. If nor you, nor the other person are willing to lose some time with friends, school or something else, you won't be able to be together. However I have found that the moments when you finally see that person are much more filled with passion and emotion then the everyday feel you get in a normal relationship.
Long distance relationships just don't work ultimately, you can't have a relationship without physical interaction
Personally met my girlfriend through playing Diablo 2, I actually met her father first. We played WoW together for a year or so and then got into a relationship. We met eachother a year or so afterwards and then visited eachother every summer / winter, now she lives with me and visits her family every summer / winter. It's been 7 years coming up this Dec that we've been together.
So, yeah, I think they work in some cases.
[QUOTE=Butthurter;33768045]you and h2o met?[/QUOTE]
nope they live in the same house but make sure they're never in the same room together
[QUOTE=Shadaez;33768406]
nope they live in the same house but make sure they're never in the same room together[/QUOTE]
It gets really awkward at times, I mean we only have one bed so whoever isn't fast enough to run to the bedroom after skype chatting has to sleep on the sofa :(
I think they are possible. However a relationship has a terrible, terrible chance of lasting unless you meet/plan to meet up in life.
They are possible, but they are indeed hard.
My mom succeed in one, but yet she and my step dad sees each other every two weeks.
But then I believe that to create any relationships, the best thing is to meet the person first hand and make your opinion after. My last relationship was a LDR(Yes we met, slept together, been together), but we broke up because we sorta figured out that in our current state of life, low income and low time, would make it too hard. But I still believe that they are possible.
In all honesty, 'Possible' was probably a bad way to ask the question, as obviously they are possible.
'Functional' would of been a better way to phrase it.
Well they can be functional if both parties have the means to see once in a while.
When I studied abroad, I met and dated a girl for about 9 months. We really loved each other, so when we had to leave we tried to keep things going in a long distance relationship. Skype and technology made it a lot easier than the old days probably had it, but it was still tough.
Because we had no sure future together, it fell apart. I feel a LDR can work if you have a common goal or something to look forward to. A plan I guess. And it's something after you meet in real life. If you meet on the internet you're doing it wrong.
I am for about half a year in relationship with my man (yeah I am male myself), who lives in western Canada, myself living in Prague, Czech Republic.
We are almost on the opposite ends of the planet, yet I still believe in this relationship powerfully, and am willing to hold it over distance as long as it's necessary. I am planning to move to Canada to live with him, once I finish my studies here.
Mine is going well, I visited her last July. Good times.
People who have never had a decent relationship say long distance relationships can work.
People who have or have been in a decent relationship know they won't.
The only time I can ever really see them working out as fulfilling is when you are together with someone for an amount of time and then are separated but still seeing eachother periodically. You can't have that same connection with someone you've never met whom you speak with over a phone or webcam that you can with someone you spend time with and get close to.
The internet is a tool for meeting new people, albiet a bit of a sad way of going about it but you need that physical contact to maintain a proper relationship.
I was in one with someone who went to school in Auburn, Washington. Ended rather horribly since I kinda told her off because of her religion. It was rather annoying tho since we kept in contact for like 20 hrs a day.
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