Super Friendly Social and Love Advice v8 - Stop spamming her with texts. - General

[QUOTE=maeZtro;51963425]Good for you but yeah you should have gotten her number instead. I don't know what it's like in the US but here people generally really dislike talking on the phone and are super awkward even when texting with someone they don't know very well. I once gave my number to a girl who had a crush on me but she couldn't build up the confidence to call or text and it was years before I found out.[/QUOTE] welp thanks alcohol

[QUOTE=PredGD;51963289]I'm scared that if I pile that worry on top of all the other worries I have that she knows about, she might feel like I don't trust her at all. Maybe she'll be offended that I'm having the thought to begin with. It would be nice to hear from her that there's nothing to worry about but then again, if my worry is legitimate I'll most likely get a lie out of her which means I probably shouldn't expect any other answer but "there's nothing to worry about". Do you want to share the signs you experienced? Everybody is different of course so the signs could be wildly different but it would be nice to hear anyway, if you want to share.[/QUOTE] I've read a few of your other posts and it sounds to be like your in a fairly co-dependent relationship. I can relate because the relationship I had before this one was co-dependent and when we started to spend more time apart it felt really bad like we were falling apart. Spending 6 out of 7 days with your SO is a lot of time to be together and can put a strain on your relationship (I only spend 2 out of 7 days with my current lady). Your going to have to learn to be independent, and be okay with not being around your SO. Understand that you should only conclude for what is actually going on, and that these imaginary fables are only imaginary. Only worry about something when it actually presents itself (such as lying or cheating). Worrying over things that have never happened yet will only put strain on your relationship and yourself. I would suggest when those thoughts come up try exercising, meditation, or reading a book.

Doctors showed me distance I flew out of window. [url]http://i.imgur.com/rBfHzPS.jpg[/url] I am not surprised anymore why my back is fucked.

[QUOTE=Loofiloo;51962499] And if you WANT to date this person, why not TRY to date them? If they want to date you, they'll say yes to the date. If they don't want to date you, you're not going to change that by asking them out to a bunch of one-on-one outings that you don't refer to as dates. Plus, asking them out on non-dates when you have another intention is arguably dishonest.[/QUOTE] ye this is what ive been thinking, that i might as well ask them on a date to make it clear if shes interested in going on one-on-one outings as a date or just as friends

[QUOTE=Loofiloo;51962499]I don't think it's really super important whether you call it a date or you're just trying to spend one-on-one time with somebody. Because that's basically what a date is. A date isn't this huge intimidating formal event, it's literally just spending time alone with someone. [/QUOTE] Oh my god. If I went by this logic, I've actually been on a date before and didn't know it! It was finals week and we studied together for an hour. Her boyfriend was in another country and I wasn't aware I had a crush on her until after I went home. So I guess I went on a date with a girl who already had a boyfriend... I guess that makes me a scumbag.

[QUOTE=Mr. Sarcastic;51966799]Oh my god. If I went by this logic, I've actually been on a date before and didn't know it! It was finals week and we studied together for an hour. Her boyfriend was in another country and I wasn't aware I had a crush on her until after I went home. So I guess I went on a date with a girl who already had a boyfriend... I guess that makes me a scumbag.[/QUOTE] I mean... You usually do something FUN together. But crazier things have happened

I'm honestly freaking out. I have been talking to this one girl from college and asked her out once but she said she was busy that week. She said if I had invited her sooner she might've been able to make it. now after like a week or so since our last talk I can't see her profile picture on what's and when I go to her profile all it appears is invite to what'sapp and her number. I still have her last messages on my phone but still. My best guess she probably blocked me for whatever reason. If that's the case than I'm beyond crushed right now. Our last messages ended up in such a good note too. I'm really sad right now.

[QUOTE=JeSuisIkea;51964302]welp thanks alcohol[/QUOTE] My buddy works at the same place as her and I was out with a friend, and we both decided to visit him. I figured she wouldn't even be in since I never saw her there at that hour. I walked in and I locked eyes with her immediately and she more or less ran for the hills into the back room. Guess she thought I was there to stalk her. Then went to the cashier and asked if my buddy was there and she looked at me like I was a dick and told me he no longer worked there as of this morning. Guess I'm never showing my face at that store again. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

dannysketch wheres the update!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! [sp]boy cant update bc hes drowning in the pussy after the magic show with his mom and sister[/sp]

Magic show date...lol

I'll be switching programs because the one I'm in don't qualify for free cabs so I won't be in the girls group anymore but I would still see her during lunch. I'm going to ask for her number before I leave

I'm going to follow my friend's advice and not let this girl keep me from doing things I enjoy. There's a swing dance club meeting tonight that I'm going to, even though that was where I first met her (and she might be there). Wish me luck [sp](at ignoring the melancholy thoughts I'll feel if I see her.)[/sp]

What do you mean by that? She doesn't let you do things you enjoy because that's not good at all

[QUOTE=Crpto2007;51972518]What do you mean by that? She doesn't let you do things you enjoy because that's not good at all[/QUOTE] Exactly. Id be dancing my ass off out of pure spite. :dance:

[QUOTE=Crpto2007;51972518]What do you mean by that? She doesn't let you do things you enjoy because that's not good at all[/QUOTE] No, I mean that I limit the social situations where I might run into her. She hasn't been going for a while anyway, so I didn't see her. Although, that means I'm going to have to find another girl that I'm comfortable dancing with now.

I didnt know love advice was still around :>

[QUOTE=HookerVomit;51973371]I didnt know love advice was still around :>[/QUOTE] Still with MaverickIB laying some common sense into idiots on occasion too.

[QUOTE=Mr. Sarcastic;51973368]No, I mean that I limit the social situations where I might run into her. She hasn't been going for a while anyway, so I didn't see her. Although, that means I'm going to have to find another girl that I'm comfortable dancing with now.[/QUOTE] You shouldn't let her keep you from doing anything, go out and enjoy man!

[QUOTE=Kirbyfactor;51973641]You shouldn't let her keep you from doing anything, go out and enjoy man![/QUOTE] Agreed it's not a really good relationship if you feel controlled by her. You both should be able to do whatever you want

He's not in a relationship with her. It's a friend he's crushing hard on who is dating someone else who he hangs out with.

[QUOTE=OvB;51973854]He's not in a relationship with her. It's a friend he's crushing hard on who is dating someone else who he hangs out with.[/QUOTE] Where's the bad reading rating when you need it?

how do you guys feel about "reminding" things to girls, like I cant tell if she didnt do what she said she will because she meant it as an excuse or just forgot about it. Play it safe and leave it be?

So she and her bf sat down with me and some friends at dinner today. A rather awkward conversation started about where our parents went for their honeymoon, and from there it moved to where we think we were conceived. I mentioned that my parents went to Gettysburg for their honeymoon (technically it was their second honeymoon because my mother was already pregnant with me). The girl said something to the effect of, "Do you think it's possible that he (me) was conceived at Gettysburg? That would explain everything about Zach" *thoughtful grin* (I'm obsessed with history.) I responded sarcastically saying "I'm not sure whether I should take that as a compliment or an insult." That was when she said "Zach...I love you...as a friend." The way she kind of paused confused me, but I played it off like she was making a joke. After that the rest of the conversation went smoothly and soon we were all back to making witty remarks at each other, but the way she said that is bothering me. I'm probably just double-thinking that she both has some feelings for me and doesn't have feelings for me.

[QUOTE=Mr. Sarcastic;51977420]So she and her bf sat down with me and some friends at dinner today. A rather awkward conversation started about where our parents went for their honeymoon, and from there it moved to where we think we were conceived. I mentioned that my parents went to Gettysburg for their honeymoon (technically it was their second honeymoon because my mother was already pregnant with me). The girl said something to the effect of, "Do you think it's possible that he (me) was conceived at Gettysburg? That would explain everything about Zach" *thoughtful grin* (I'm obsessed with history.) I responded sarcastically saying "I'm not sure whether I should take that as a compliment or an insult." That was when she said "Zach...I love you...as a friend." The way she kind of paused confused me, but I played it off like she was making a joke. After that the rest of the conversation went smoothly and soon we were all back to making witty remarks at each other, but the way she said that is bothering me. I'm probably just double-thinking that she both has some feelings for me and doesn't have feelings for me.[/QUOTE] She just said she likes you as a friend. By the sounds of it, it looks like she immediately realized how it sounded when she started off that sentence, which is why the qualifier "as a friend" got tacked in really quickly. Assume no feelings (plus, she has a boyfriend, so don't even go there) and move on.

Man I swear every time I go out drinking with work friends I come into these revelations I semi-wish I didn't have. Like tonight I was able to confirm that some co-workers (former and current) including one manager pretty well know that I was involved with one of the girls there (whom I STILL work with). Tonight it was just me, that manager, and one former co-worker left at the end of the night and I had to go through the line of questioning of "If she showed up here, RIGHT now, dropped her pants and grabbed her ankles, would you be like 'ok, this is happening' or would you tell her to go to hell?" I had to tell them "uhh she has a boyfriend now so I'm not really considering shit like that, and in fact I barely talk to her now." But they had to press on, going "ok, what if she did that AND she told you she just broke up with her boyfriend?" I guess it's safe to assume at this point that most everyone at work knows that this girl and I had a thing for a while. Now I know that several of them basically ship us, and now they want us to get back together. My manager told me he's proud of me for all I've been through in that regard.

hmmmmmmmmmmmmm Beginning of last semester there was a girl I was interested in, so maybe 5 weeks in I worked up the courage to move over next to her in one of these giant lecture auditoriums(i had other smaller classes w/ her too) and tried to start a conversation with her. She mentioned earlier that she was into web design and app design so I thought 'wow perfect I can start a conversation based on that' and the conversation went like this: "Hey you're into web design right?" "Yeah" "Have you made any websites yet?" "No I'm still learning" and that was followed by ten seconds of silence until I broke it by saying "I'm going to sit over there now" and then I got up and moved 5 seats over and stared ahead for the next few minutes. It's mostly repressed now but the cool thing is I'm working w/ her and some others in a design competition, and her and I are supposed to be doing the branding portion together. The conversations haven't been that terrible either so I guess that earlier approach didn't matter all that much.

Well, the girl which I haven't talked in 4 years that I used to like accepted my friend request on FB. I'm glad she still likes me enough to consider out of the blue friend requests but I'm kinda lost on what to do. I want to be her friend but I don't want her to think I still have feelings for her. I probably try talking to her some time next week after I'm done with college work. But I honestly have no idea what to say.

[QUOTE=LaughingStock;51977651]hmmmmmmmmmmmmm Beginning of last semester there was a girl I was interested in, so maybe 5 weeks in I worked up the courage to move over next to her in one of these giant lecture auditoriums(i had other smaller classes w/ her too) and tried to start a conversation with her. She mentioned earlier that she was into web design and app design so I thought 'wow perfect I can start a conversation based on that' and the conversation went like this: "Hey you're into web design right?" "Yeah" "Have you made any websites yet?" "No I'm still learning" and that was followed by ten seconds of silence until I broke it by saying "I'm going to sit over there now" and then I got up and moved 5 seats over and stared ahead for the next few minutes. It's mostly repressed now but the cool thing is I'm working w/ her and some others in a design competition, and her and I are supposed to be doing the branding portion together. The conversations haven't been that terrible either so I guess that earlier approach didn't matter all that much.[/QUOTE] For what it's worth, be careful when you try to work with women you're interested in - sometimes it's a massive breach of trust for them to discover that stuff while they're focused on work and things, so maybe kick it up after your design competition is done. [editline]18th March 2017[/editline] [QUOTE=SoftHearted;51977661]Well, the girl which I haven't talked in 4 years that I used to like accepted my friend request on FB. I'm glad she still likes me enough to consider out of the blue friend requests but I'm kinda lost on what to do. I want to be her friend but I don't want her to think I still have feelings for her. I probably try talking to her some time next week after I'm done with college work. But I honestly have no idea what to say.[/QUOTE] "Hey, how have you been doing? I was just thinking about <common event the both of you were a part of> and just wondered if you were on Facebook." You sent her a request (I'm assuming) because you share common interests and want to reconnect, so do that. Don't try to assume what other people feel when they're talking to you, man, that shit gets in the way of an honest conversation. Just chit-chat, make no assumptions and that's it.

[QUOTE=snookypookums;51977448]She just said she likes you as a friend. By the sounds of it, it looks like she immediately realized how it sounded when she started off that sentence, which is why the qualifier "as a friend" got tacked in really quickly. Assume no feelings (plus, she has a boyfriend, so don't even go there) and move on.[/QUOTE] That's what I assumed. This is kind of new territory for me, because most of the girls I had crushes on before were partially based on appearance. With this girl, I think I fell for her purely because of how similar our personalities and interests overlap. I guess it's sort of an intellectual crush.

[QUOTE=Mr. Sarcastic;51978275]That's what I assumed. This is kind of new territory for me, because most of the girls I had crushes on before were partially based on appearance. With this girl, I think I fell for her purely because of how similar our personalities and interests overlap. I guess it's sort of an intellectual crush.[/QUOTE] You have my sympathies - everyone can "Bingo Little" women, but it's kinda hard to get over someone you sorta feel a connection with, but the circumstances and timing aren't right. I know I've had it a fair few times already, but eh, c'est la vie. :smile: