Super Friendly Social and Love Advice v8 - Stop spamming her with texts. - General

I had an idea the other day. Basically, my sister has a really, really big social circle. I would ask her if she knows someone to hook me up with, but we wouldn't go on a real date, we would go on a "practice date". Basically, we would go through the motions of a real date, but she would give me advice and tell me what I'm doing wrong. This seems like a pretty bad idea to me, but I keep going back to it. What do you guys think?

sounds like the next big rom com

[QUOTE=Ardosos;52001519]I had an idea the other day. Basically, my sister has a really, really big social circle. I would ask her if she knows someone to hook me up with, but we wouldn't go on a real date, we would go on a "practice date". Basically, we would go through the motions of a real date, but she would give me advice and tell me what I'm doing wrong. This seems like a pretty bad idea to me, but I keep going back to it. What do you guys think?[/QUOTE] You can always just ask your sister for advice, too. That's like a free girl best friend at your fingertips.

So the date went great I think, we just sat and talked about all kinds of stuff, a lot of politics actually, and when I had to leave for work she asked if I want to go to a party with her tomorrow.

[QUOTE=MrJazzy;52001708]So the date went great I think, we just sat and talked about all kinds of stuff, a lot of politics actually, and when I had to leave for work she asked if I want to go to a party with her tomorrow.[/QUOTE] If she's immediately planning to meet up again, it went well for sure.

[QUOTE=NixNax123;52001038]was it a good date? set up another. 2 days is fine. was it meh? chill[/QUOTE] Alright I just messaged her, asking if she was interested in going out again. Tinder people can be so flaky, so I think that's why I'm over thinking everything.

[QUOTE=SataniX;52001726]If she's immediately planning to meet up again, it went well for sure.[/QUOTE] Yeah, I figured, I feel pretty excited and proud of myself for doing this despite my lack of self-confidence.

[QUOTE=Ardosos;52001519]I had an idea the other day. Basically, my sister has a really, really big social circle. I would ask her if she knows someone to hook me up with, but we wouldn't go on a real date, we would go on a "practice date". Basically, we would go through the motions of a real date, but she would give me advice and tell me what I'm doing wrong. This seems like a pretty bad idea to me, but I keep going back to it. What do you guys think?[/QUOTE] Personally I'd say no to this idea. If you indeed do it, and this friend gives you advice. Your next genuine date isn't going to be natural for you anymore. Instead of focusing on having a fun time and getting to know your date, it's going to be about going over everything this girl told you as advice. Which will lead to you spending more time in your head than with the date. Just my 2 cents

Texted her for almost 3 hours talking about stuff. I'm really surprised I found someone that's just like me. She said I can text her anytime. I really wonder if she's into me

[QUOTE=Ardosos;52001519]I had an idea the other day. Basically, my sister has a really, really big social circle. I would ask her if she knows someone to hook me up with, but we wouldn't go on a real date, we would go on a "practice date". Basically, we would go through the motions of a real date, but she would give me advice and tell me what I'm doing wrong. This seems like a pretty bad idea to me, but I keep going back to it. What do you guys think?[/QUOTE] You seem to have this idea that dates are something definitive and something you practice for, which is the wrong conclusion to come to with these sort of things. Don't treat dates like they're an especially sensitive and special occasion. They're just outings with someone who you're interested in getting to know. Treat it like hanging out with a friend- functionally, they're not much different.

[QUOTE=ZombieWaffle;52002216]You seem to have this idea that dates are something definitive and something you practice for, which is the wrong conclusion to come to with these sort of things. Don't treat dates like they're an especially sensitive and special occasion. They're just outings with someone who you're interested in getting to know. Treat it like hanging out with a friend- functionally, they're not much different.[/QUOTE] I get that there aren't scripted template "perfect dates" but come on now, don't try to tell me that there aren't things you shouldn't do.

I've been in at least one date in my life. So I can assure you the best thing to do is just be yourself and let conversation flow naturally. The more casually you take things the more likely you're to make your date more comfortable.

[QUOTE=SoftHearted;52002326]I've been in at least one date in my life. So I can assure you the best thing to do is just be yourself and let conversation flow naturally. The more casually you take things the more likely you're to make your date more comfortable.[/QUOTE] This is the conclusion I've made after todays date, which was my first ever.

[QUOTE=Crpto2007;52002199]Texted her for almost 3 hours talking about stuff. I'm really surprised I found someone that's just like me. She said I can text her anytime. I really wonder if she's into me[/QUOTE] Too early to say anything.

[QUOTE=Ardosos;52002235]I get that there aren't scripted template "perfect dates" but come on now, don't try to tell me that there aren't things you shouldn't do.[/QUOTE] When you go on a date, let go of your previous concept of what a date should be, and just try to have a good time- enjoy spending time with another person. Forget about the expectations that popular culture instills through overtly romanticized movies and TV shows. Certainly, there are actions one shouldn't take on a date, but they really aren't any different from actions you wouldn't take were you with a normal friend. Don't make it weird.

[QUOTE=Ardosos;52002235]I get that there aren't scripted template "perfect dates" but come on now, don't try to tell me that there aren't things you shouldn't do.[/QUOTE] The things you shouldn't do are generally the same things you wouldn't do under other circumstances. Like have decent table manners, don't jump into extremely personal topics, don't make rude comments/jokes. I agree with the people who say you don't need to treat it like a big formal occasion, and if you want to practice trying it out, don't even make the practice session a formal occasion. Think about going out for lunch with a guy friend, especially if there's a guy friend you don't know very well yet. Are there things that you would do in this context that you think you shouldn't do on a date? Can you give any examples? To me, I think the biggest difference between a date and "just hanging out" would be that you (and hopefully the other person) are trying a little harder than normal to make a good impression, which isn't a far cry from the process of making a new platonic friend.

[QUOTE=fritzel;52002334]Too early to say anything.[/QUOTE] I know it's still to early but I found myself really liking her. do you think I should text her tomorrow or is it to much if I try to talk to her a lot?

Saw them again today. I showed her and her bf my record that arrived in the mail today. I lucked out the other night, they had a rehearsal for a play to go to, so she didn't see me singing that song and put 2 and 2 together. I'm trying not to notice her and just talk to other people, hopefully this will lead me towards focusing on another girl.

I gave up on Tinder one day because everything that came from it seemed fake to me. I lurk here pretty often, so I decided to follow the #1 piece of advice given here for a girl that I met a few weeks ago: "JUST FUCKING ASK HER OUT." I'm pretty much a nervous wreck when it comes down to it (especially in person but asking someone out over text feels wrong imo), but I manned up and did it, and she said yes and we have a date for next weekend :dance: Thanks to the regulars here for continuing to give good advice, just know there's people like myself benefiting from it even if they don't post about it

Well, I've beeb home from hospital for past 2 days and while struggles continue with my back - it feels great. I am off work for another week then I am working from home. This was a life lesson for me, I clearly cant handle alcohol so I am quitting it. + I've quit smoking as I was in hospital for a month and didn't smoke and now wish to smoke is gone. Guess I am extremely lucky to be alive considering list of incidents that occured. Here is my time line if anyone is interested: 24th of Feb: I went to party, got drunk and walked home on hard shoulder, got ran over by car with 4 people inside. (At this point injuries: Skull fracture, fractured left shoulder, two fractured ribs on right side, multiple head wounds requiring stiches). 24th - 25th Feb: I was in induced coma due to injuries, I briefly remember opening my eyes while on operation table and seeing bright lights (this was when doctors awoke me to ask where I live) I soomehow mumbled where I live and I was put back into coma, police was sent to my place to get in and find ID to contact somebody from my family. 26th of Feb: I woke up but I dont remember anything due to head damage. 27th of Feb: Somebody at hospital decided to discharge me, so I went home. 28th of Feb: I am getting sick all day and feeling extremely weak and bad, called ambulance and they made decision to take me back into hospital. 28th of Feb - 2nd of March: I am in intensive care unit in hospital just sleeping all day pretty much. 2nd of March: I get transfered to general hospital and put into room with other patients as they consider my condition less serious now. 2nd of March night: They give me tramadol and apparently I get hallucination side effect from it (this is where it gets bizzare). I dream: I awake in hospital which is some weird drug house apartment and it looks like place where your organs would get harvested, I try to leave but I get stopped by security, so I make decision that only way to escape this place is via balcony, so I open balcoony, climb over railing and jump down from 2nd/3rd floor, apparently this wasn't fully dream, I was hallucinating, I was sleep walking while seeing completely wrong things, in reality I fell from 2nd/3rd floor and sustained additional head damage and spine fracture. At this point to my list of injuries I get added: T12, T11, L1, L2 spine compression fractures + skull damage again requiring additional stiches as I landed on my head. 2nd of March - 5th of March: I am asleep. 5th of March - 10th of March: I woke up but my memory is gone and mind is fucked, according to my memories: *I live in US. *I quit my job in Ireland. *I got 14 million from youtube royalities. *I bought multiple apartments in US for 14 million and rented them out and just was gonna sit home for rest of my life and receive rent from my apartments. *I had weird sub-dream where I was stuck in somebodies body and felt all their pain, I saw them being killed and tortured by bunch of low-life scumbags and I felt all their pain and couldn't leave their body, it was weird, then I commited suicide to escape this pain but after I shot myself in head - I woke up in another persons body and felt their pain too (I guess this was pain that I was feeling in reality while my back was broken) *I wrote to all my friends on fb that I moved to US, because I genuinenely thought that. 10th of March: I caught back to Reality after talking to psychiatrist, I kept telling them statements and they kept saying if it's true or not, after a while I caught back to reality and was glad nothing changed and I still have my job. 10th of March - 16nd of March: I was just in bed lying horizontally. 16th of March: I get back brace which helps me move and I can walk and sit with my back. 22nd of March: I get discharged and go home. So yeah, that was definetely weird experience, all these weird dreams, mixed realities etc... Now it's just a matter of time, I was told 2 weeks for pain to go away and 6-8 weeks for back to heal up, it could've been worse, I could've been paralyzed considering I landed on my head.

[QUOTE=Crpto2007;52003019]I know it's still to early but I found myself really liking her. do you think I should text her tomorrow or is it to much if I try to talk to her a lot?[/QUOTE] Sure, you can but don't rely too much on texts and talks over cell to make any judgments. Try to arrange a meetup after few days if she is willing. You will know if she is interested. Sometimes, girls find it "convenient and safe" to be with someone without meaning anything seriously about love. You should not be investing so much at any point that it becomes difficult to bailout. A healthy relationship is where you can go about your day even without her and still be able to enjoy.

[QUOTE=arleitiss;52005587] This was a life lesson for me, I clearly cant handle alcohol so I am quitting it. + I've quit smoking as I was in hospital for a month and didn't smoke and now wish to smoke is gone. Guess I am extremely lucky to be alive considering list of incidents that occured. Here is my time line if anyone is interested: 24th of Feb: I went to party, got drunk and walked home on hard shoulder, got ran over by car with 4 people inside. (At this point injuries: Skull fracture, fractured left shoulder, two fractured ribs on right side, multiple head wounds requiring stiches). 24th - 25th Feb: I was in induced coma due to injuries, I briefly remember opening my eyes while on operation table and seeing bright lights (this was when doctors awoke me to ask where I live) I soomehow mumbled where I live and I was put back into coma, police was sent to my place to get in and find ID to contact somebody from my family. 26th of Feb: I woke up but I dont remember anything due to head damage. 2nd of March night: They give me tramadol and apparently I get hallucination side effect from it (this is where it gets bizzare). I dream: I awake in hospital which is some weird drug house apartment and it looks like place where your organs would get harvested, I try to leave but I get stopped by security, so I make decision that only way to escape this place is via balcony, so I open balcoony, climb over railing and jump down from 2nd/3rd floor, apparently this wasn't fully dream, I was hallucinating, I was sleep walking while seeing completely wrong things, in reality I fell from 2nd/3rd floor and sustained additional head damage and spine fracture. At this point to my list of injuries I get added: T12, T11, L1, L2 spine compression fractures + skull damage again requiring additional stiches as I landed on my head. 5th of March - 10th of March: I woke up but my memory is gone and mind is fucked, according to my memories: *I live in US. *I quit my job in Ireland. *I got 14 million from youtube royalities. *I bought multiple apartments in US for 14 million and rented them out and just was gonna sit home for rest of my life and receive rent from my apartments. *I had weird sub-dream where I was stuck in somebodies body and felt all their pain, I saw them being killed and tortured by bunch of low-life scumbags and I felt all their pain and couldn't leave their body, it was weird, then I commited suicide to escape this pain but after I shot myself in head - I woke up in another persons body and felt their pain too (I guess this was pain that I was feeling in reality while my back was broken) *I wrote to all my friends on fb that I moved to US, because I genuinenely thought that. 10th of March: I caught back to Reality after talking to psychiatrist, I kept telling them statements and they kept saying if it's true or not, after a while I caught back to reality and was glad nothing changed and I still have my job.[/QUOTE] [video=youtube;FhXz60f0HLU]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FhXz60f0HLU&app=desktop[/video] But seriously, you're lucky to be alive and that is a hell of a story to tell when you're older. I hope things get better for you. Don't work too hard ok?

[QUOTE=fritzel;52005955]Sure, you can but don't rely too much on texts and talks over cell to make any judgments. Try to arrange a meetup after few days if she is willing. You will know if she is interested. Sometimes, girls find it "convenient and safe" to be with someone without meaning anything seriously about love. You should not be investing so much at any point that it becomes difficult to bailout. A healthy relationship is where you can go about your day even without her and still be able to enjoy.[/QUOTE] I'll text her again after she gets out of program. I was thinking of asking if she wanted to meet up one day. We both have nobody else to talk to and she seemed interested in me when we talked. i think I'll wait a bit longer before asking because I don't know if it's to soon or not

[QUOTE=RenegadeCop;52006832]Does anyone have job interview advice? I'm going to interviewing with the Tennessee Comptroller of Treasury State Audit Department. Cool as shit, yo, and I'm pretty excited just to interview for a chance at getting the audit position.[/QUOTE] Dont have your hands in your pockets, make eye contact, look like you're excited for the job. Think before you speak too, you don't need to respond right away. Try to be articulate and just natural, don't try to force stories/explanations or words. Best advice is to just relax, hype yourself up and tell yourself you're gonna get that job cause you're ready, qualified and deserve it.

Also always ask for the position at the end of the interview [editline]24th March 2017[/editline] Make sure you ask them questions too, shows you're legitimately interested

Give a firm handshake before and after the interview. And make sure to have the ability to learn names unlike me - it's really helpful apparently.

[QUOTE=RenegadeCop;52006930]Man, I am hyped. I'm an accountant that hates corporations. Working for the state is the ideal job for me. I am going to practice my "Tell me about yourself" answer.[/QUOTE] Make sure you talk about hobbies outside of work

[QUOTE=The Rifleman;52006957]Make sure you talk about hobbies outside of work[/QUOTE] Also make sure you don't list the hobbies they don't want to hear! Things like writing. reading, playing guitar : Good! Taking LSD, and having a threesome with mexican hooker: Bad!

[QUOTE=Kirbyfactor;52006981]Also make sure you don't list the hobbies they don't want to hear! Things like writing. reading, playing guitar : Good! Taking LSD, and having a threesome with mexican hooker: Bad![/QUOTE] Unless you're going for a porn job. I think they'd appreciate the threesome experience :smug:

I mentioned doing peyote (not that I did it, just in context to a question) in my interview and I still got the job!