Sex, Girlfriends and Shit VII: "Power Moves For High Quality Women" - General

Have you at least talked to her over skype or something? Just to actually see her and know she at least looks like who she claims to be?

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dirty talk took an interesting turn when it went from "fuck me harder" to "i want you to marry me" that was a fun conversation

Looks like my issue is still a thing. Gonna call my doc next monday about it. I have to go anyway since I found a lump on my lower leg. It's been there for about a month or longer for all I know. So yeah... I honestly don't feel like talking about it with my doc tho.

I've been out for drinks a few times with a girl and need an idea for a next date since I don't want to keep doing that over and over. I'd take her to the movies if there was anything worth seeing but there isn't. It's a small town and winter is too miserable to do anything outside. Any ideas? Budget is tiny.

[QUOTE=Dirty_Ape;51626999]I've been out for drinks a few times with a girl and need an idea for a next date since I don't want to keep doing that over and over. I'd take her to the movies if there was anything worth seeing but there isn't. It's a small town and winter is too miserable to do anything outside. Any ideas? Budget is tiny.[/QUOTE] Bowling? Any plays, museums, tourist attractions, etc in the area?

[QUOTE=_Axel;51619245]I use manix or durex gels, is that what you're referring to? Should I put it outside only or does putting some inside around the tip help? It feels kinda uncomfortable around that area, like a small Indian burn. I also feel kind of... compressed? I'm trying not to use too small ones but the ones I use are already about 56 mm width, are there alternatives that are a bit bigger? I don't want the thing to slip off at the first occasion either.[/QUOTE] Man, I've never, ever had luck with condoms. Just like you, they feel too small, too tight, too constricting. They always end up stretching way the fuck out over the tip and never reach the base of my dick, leaving me unprotected from skin to skin contact for the last inch or so. I don't feel shit when I use them even when I lube the fuck up (which is an absolute necessity with them imo) and I've broken more than I can count during sex, especially vaginal. While it's poor practice, if you're super impatient about waiting for her to get her birth control, and are both okay with it, ditch the condom for one night and buy her a Plan B for the next day. This isn't something you should do often or at all if you can avoid it, but hell, I think it'd be worth it to finally have the experience.

[QUOTE=Aetna;51628420]Man, I've never, ever had luck with condoms. Just like you, they feel too small, too tight, too constricting. They always end up stretching way the fuck out over the tip and never reach the base of my dick, leaving me unprotected from skin to skin contact for the last inch or so. I don't feel shit when I use them even when I lube the fuck up (which is an absolute necessity with them imo) and I've broken more than I can count during sex, especially vaginal. While it's poor practice, if you're super impatient about waiting for her to get her birth control, and are both okay with it, ditch the condom for one night and buy her a [B]Plan B[/B] for the next day. This isn't something you should do often or at all if you can avoid it, but hell, I think it'd be worth it to finally have the experience.[/QUOTE] Just make absolutely sure that she knows there is a good chance for it to [I]fuck with her cycle hardcore[/I] for a good week or two

[QUOTE=S31-Syntax;51628548]Just make absolutely sure that she knows there is a good chance for it to [I]fuck with her cycle hardcore[/I] for a good week or two[/QUOTE] It varies from girl to girl. I've made many panicked CVS runs in my day and none of them had any issues after taking it, but yes, definitely discuss it with her and make sure she's comfortable. I feel like it's worth it, especially since he's been waiting a whole year to share that experience with her.

Plan B can have some pretty nasty side effects, depending. Made my fiancee feel quite ill on the few occasions we've needed it. Better than an unplanned pregnancy, though!

Plan B is pretty expensive too. If you're gonna do that, make sure YOU'RE the one buying it lol.

[QUOTE=Pascall;51628709]Plan B is pretty expensive too. If you're gonna do that, make sure YOU'RE the one buying it lol.[/QUOTE] Again - if you're planning on doing what I said above, it's all on you, with her permission. Don't be that guy who makes a girl buy the PB after you failed to use protection.

She's not very comfortable with trying without a condom yet, I really hope she will be eventually but in the meantime I think I'm going to try using lube inside and out and see if that changes anything. [editline]5th January 2017[/editline] She already bought a morning pill though.

[QUOTE=_Axel;51628753]She's not very comfortable with trying without a condom yet, I really hope she will be eventually but in the meantime I think I'm going to try using lube inside and out and see if that changes anything. [editline]5th January 2017[/editline] She already bought a morning pill though.[/QUOTE] Have you asked her why she's uncomfortable? The only risks are STD's and pregnancy, and the last resort pill works 99% of the time (in my experience). It'll greatly enhance the pleasure for both of you, trust me. It's like night and day. I remember being 15 and taking off a condom for the first time and just being blown away by how good it felt, and she felt the same way.

[QUOTE=Aetna;51628793]Have you asked her why she's uncomfortable? The only risks are STD's and pregnancy, and the last resort pill works 99% of the time (in my experience). It'll greatly enhance the pleasure for both of you, trust me. It's like night and day. I remember being 15 and taking off a condom for the first time and just being blown away by how good it felt, and she felt the same way.[/QUOTE] I think it's more of a gut feeling than a rational decision. She brought up STDs and pregnancy but when I told her that her pill's effects will kick in next Sunday and that I already got tested for STDs a month ago without anything cropping up, she just said she didn't know why. She's also afraid of me coming inside and is rather disgusted by sperm. (Though in the last few months she became okay with me coming on her during titjobs and handjobs as long as it's not on her face.) [editline]6th January 2017[/editline] To be more precise that conversation happened two days ago when I talked about trying without condom next week, and she was a bit surprised by that since she thought we'd wait at least two weeks before doing that. She also said she wasn't certain that she will be comfortable in two weeks (I guess you can't really predict that).

Sounds like you're both just in the learning process and she's slowly growing more comfortable. In this case, it's best to just wait for it to happen naturally. It'll be worth the wait. I'd consider both my girl and I rather seasoned before we met, but she was surprisingly tame. I was the kinky one. She didn't even want me to go down on her. But a year and a half later and she's giving me sloppy head, enjoying anal, 69, tying her up, choking, slapping. Shit she never ever thought she'd do, let alone enjoy. The one thing she did that shocked me was telling me to cum inside everytime after her pill kicked in. I was very nervous about it but it's been 18 months and not one scare, her cycle is very regular. So I got something nice out of it too, in addition to introducing her to so many things. Her last partners must have not been patient at all.

Wife is getting her iud out in a few months, ive never had sex with a condom before. Please recommend thin ass condoms because going bareback my entire sex life has spoiled me.

[QUOTE=insane taco;51629183]Wife is getting her iud out in a few months, ive never had sex with a condom before. Please recommend thin ass condoms because going bareback my entire sex life has spoiled me.[/QUOTE] Lifestyles thin worked best for me but were still miserable. Is she getting a replacement IUD?

[QUOTE=Aetna;51628793]Have you asked her why she's uncomfortable? The only risks are STD's and pregnancy, and the last resort pill works 99% of the time (in my experience). It'll greatly enhance the pleasure for both of you, trust me. It's like night and day. I remember being 15 and taking off a condom for the first time and just being blown away by how good it felt, and she felt the same way.[/QUOTE] >15 damn

[QUOTE=Kabstrac;51629453]I don't really masturbate much at all anymore, and if I do it's without porn, and since then I've never had issues with condoms. The Lifestyles Skyn ones are all I use pretty much. They are pretty tight at the base, but not uncomfortably tight. I've never ever had a condom break before either. [B]Could also look into Lambskin/sheepskin condoms[/B]. They are pricey, and it's a little gross to think about but they are supposed to be pretty good. They don't stop STD spread however, they are only a sperm barrier[/QUOTE] Ew. I've always found that idea repulsive for some reason. Wrapping the skin of an animal around my cock is a weird thought. [editline]6th January 2017[/editline] [QUOTE=E = MC Hammer;51629394]>15 damn[/QUOTE] What do you mean?

i just dont think i persoanlly was mature enough at 15 to be having sex in general, let alone have the confidence to be having sex frequently enough to decide not using a condom was worth doing

Sorry for the hugeness, but yeah - if anyone has insight into Bipolar, Depression / Anxiety and general advice, would be super appreciated even though I'm fairly certain I'm doing things right and doing everything I can to be supportive / a positive effect on her. Wrote a letter of encouragement last night for my girlfriend for today as she's starting her new job. She suffers from anxiety, depression and bipolar so it's going to be quite a challenge for her for sure, although she takes medication for the first two things - I don't think that her medication is as effective as it could be. I'm gonna try my best to be supportive of her. I wrote how I feel about her doing this stuff and how I'm proud of how she's trying her best, but I also said that she mustn't put pressure on herself or worry about making anyone proud or disappointing anyone - she just needs to try for herself and see where it goes. We have a good relationship, like, so far there hasn't been anything - which is odd, but I think that in general our relationship is quite an odd one, in the fact that we get along so well. Because usually I get annoyed or tired of seeing someone as often as we see each other, and she DEFINITELY does too, but it doesn't happen with us in general. But there's a little thing bugging me from yesterday; she told me she wanted to break up with me after asking me to come over to talk about something. But then after we talked about why, she took it back as she couldn't think of any real reason why we should break up besides the possibility of her having a dip (bipolar related mood changes) making her feel like that. I told her that maybe the fear she expresses to me somewhat regularly (of fucking everything up like she did with a past relationship) may also be why she felt like that, because she's scared of really hurting me. I told her that I understand that she can't control it sometimes and that I don't feel she should be sorry for saying it, because it didn't actually happen and we didn't argue or anything. I told her about my dad having medication after being undiagnosed for years and told her how it has drastically leveled out his mood so he doesn't really have the extreme ends anymore and she told me she's going to ask about it the next time she sees her therapist. >> A small insert about a friend of hers who is giving her negative thoughts towards men, possibly because she wishes to be together with her again even though she's an asshole and she's lucky that she's been able to remain friends. Basically, one friend of hers came over and hanged with her while I was working on some stuff for my job, and after she left I noticed how off my gf was being with me. She told me the next day that that friend of hers tried to convince her that she's not bisexual but is actually just gay, and she told me she knows it's not true but at the time she started to believe it and she thinks it's because she has massive trust issues with men - and her best friend from the Netherlands is on MY side, he told her that friend is pretty much trying to fuck with her (she told me herself that happens when they meet) and that he thinks I'm good for her and that it's very likely that it is because of the trust thing. That same friend came over on my birthday, we were chilling and she was fine but then towards the end of the night she started to get really fucking weird, playing songs with certain undertones, singing, being flirty and shit. The funny part is, since that talk with her best friend, my gf told me that she's not going to pay as much attention to what her friend says to her or does anymore because she finally can see how much it fucks with her head - she told me she almost fucked it up with us after that first night, but her best friend reassured her of us - and I noticed how that person affects her and how she says things - she's manipulative, and it makes my gf manipulative towards her because I guess when they were dating in the past they didn't have a good relationship - I have no fears or anything about her still talking with past partners, she always says if I want to read messages I can but I told her I don't need to because I trust her. Of course, if she gives me a reason not to trust her, I think that I would just have to sit down with her and talk about how I feel, but so far I believe there is no reason to worry. >> The thing which is bugging me is; if she doesn't get this medication, and it starts to be a reoccurring feeling during these dips, how am I supposed to handle it? I mean, I handled it pretty well when she said she wanted to break up, besides crying and rejecting hugs for a moment - I immediately asked her why she feels like this and what the reasons are, and she thought about it and realised then that it isn't what she wants and was immediately extremely apologetic. I also have some worries about her therapy, as she missed one over Christmas not by choice, but then the next one she decided not to go while telling me she knows she should go and that it'll help and she'll feel better about it after, but she doesn't want to go because fuck it. Those moments are where I notice how much she could benefit from medication for her bipolar because it's very apparent that there is a conflict in her head, she describes it as rational/emotional sides of thought, and it makes sense. She also told me that she spent the money for the therapy which she needed to pay (because if you miss it you still need to pay) on weed which made me a little bit sad, but I said to her (as she asked me to not allow her to smoke for a few days) that next time she has money which she needs to keep I'll look after it if she thinks she can't resist. I would've been able to prevent her from buying it if I had been at hers, but she wanted some time apart and of course I'm not going to stand in her stairwell waiting for her to go downstairs to the guy who is apparently a dealer or something. I have noticed she's had a little bit of a fallback recently with getting high and I think that I'm going to try to help her avoid smoking more from now, because especially with working she shouldn't be going there anything but sober. I don't think it's a problem she has, I think that it's helpful for her in the short term, but in the long term it's definitely not going to be something that helps her - which is why I told her it would be a good idea to persist at getting some medication sorted out. I just have to be careful how I word things I say to her because of emotional/rational conflicts and perception. Like with her therapy which she didn't go to; I told her I won't tell her she must go, and she said it's good because the emotional side of her would've told me to go and spend the day by myself, while rationally telling me that she will regret not going because it helps her. I'm not going to force her to do anything, because that's not the way to approach someone with this kind of issue. But positive reinforcement has helped me a lot, I think that I can influence her decisions to be best in her favour without her realising and immediately rebelling against it (which is rare, but in her extreme low end of mood she can be very quick to get annoyed) but of course, she is very aware of what her best interests are, it's just hard for her to want to make the start towards them sometimes. It's not like I'm still upset or something, but it's a really difficult thing to go through and to handle in the best way - I think that I handled it pretty well, reassuring her that everything will be okay and that I'm not upset with her or something for it. She finds it really odd how when she has the regular mood shifts I don't get annoyed or pissed off at her and instead just let her get on with it. We have spent a lot of time with each other, but we don't think that it's a bad thing because we just exist in the same space together without getting tired of each other, usually doing our own things) - but of course, now she's going to be working, I am glad that there's going to be forced space because I feel like she is starting to feel overwhelmed by spending time with me, even though she is the one who asks most of the time if she can come by or if I want to come and see her. Some things which she has told me many times, not only while high but while sober too; I help her anxiety and paranoia when we're out together; I make her happy* - on multiple occasions she has told me this and not only while high; She trusts me in some ways, but not all ways (trust issues with men, very understandable as she was assaulted); The fact that I can understand how she feels when she's used to people getting annoyed with her; Our relationship is just "easy", we don't have drama, we don't have disagreements over silly things, we just work; * The fact that she has said I make her happy is one which really hit home with me, because she doesn't feel happy very often. She surprised me one night when we walked outside because I mentioned about wanting to push her on the swings, and we went there and she told me while I was pushing her that she felt butterflies - that was the first time she has felt them. I think because our relationship started off as us being friends, so there was never a rush of feelings, but those little things are reassuring. This is a long ass post so I hope someone will take the time to read it and maybe give me some advice, but from my own perception I believe what she says to me is true, when she says she loves me she does, because sometimes she won't say it to me when I say it - she doesn't lie and say it anyway and I'm glad that she doesn't because I don't do that either. I didn't have to ask her about anything because she told me herself and I think it's important that I recognise these aspects. When she's having a good day, it shows, it really shows and with some encouragement and support I think that she's going to continue to get better, the Christmas period was a bit of a high point, so of course there's the January low point, finding that middle ground is the next step and I think that she recognises the importance of doing so.

[QUOTE=E = MC Hammer;51630983]i just dont think i persoanlly was mature enough at 15 to be having sex in general, let alone have the confidence to be having sex frequently enough to decide not using a condom was worth doing[/QUOTE] I began my first serious relationship when I was 15. Her mom put her on the pill immediately and within a couple of months we ditched the condom. We were both virgins and we learned quickly and were very comfortable with each other. Not everyone is the same. To be honest I started a lot of things early - by the age of 13 I could already cook, clean, budget, and pretty much take care of myself. My parents were incredible people who answered every question I threw their way and encouraged me to go for the things I wanted no matter how hard it seemed at the time. I graduated early, moved out when I was 17, and started my career at the same time where I've been working ever since. Things just kinda fell into place with a lot of things I tried. I think I'm just lucky. [editline]6th January 2017[/editline] [QUOTE=Legend286;51631307]*long-winded post*[/QUOTE] I took the time to read everything and all I think it boils down to is if you love her enough to stick around and continue to help her. Her condition isn't something that will ever be cured, only treated and possibly treated well enough to seem insignificant, but it's always going to be there and will spark up from time to time to remind you. I personally wouldn't want to have that level of responsibility in a relationship on my hands as I struggle enough with my own life that I can't picture helping someone hold up their own, but you have to make your own decision about that. The stuff about her psycho friend and weed and whatnot are really irrelevant in the grand scheme of things if you both truly care about each other.

[QUOTE=Aetna;51631740]I began my first serious relationship when I was 15. Her mom put her on the pill immediately and within a couple of months we ditched the condom. We were both virgins and we learned quickly and were very comfortable with each other. Not everyone is the same. To be honest I started a lot of things early - by the age of 13 I could already cook, clean, budget, and pretty much take care of myself. My parents were incredible people who answered every question I threw their way and encouraged me to go for the things I wanted no matter how hard it seemed at the time. I graduated early, moved out when I was 17, and started my career at the same time where I've been working ever since. Things just kinda fell into place with a lot of things I tried. I think I'm just lucky. [editline]6th January 2017[/editline] I took the time to read everything and all I think it boils down to is if you love her enough to stick around and continue to help her. Her condition isn't something that will ever be cured, only treated and possibly treated well enough to seem insignificant, but it's always going to be there and will spark up from time to time to remind you. I personally wouldn't want to have that level of responsibility in a relationship on my hands as I struggle enough with my own life that I can't picture helping someone hold up their own, but you have to make your own decision about that. The stuff about her psycho friend and weed and whatnot are really irrelevant in the grand scheme of things if you both truly care about each other.[/QUOTE] My life is quite simple, and to be quite honest with you, if she asked to move in with me in a few months I would say yes, because we spend enough time around eachother that we just don't realise. For the time we've been together we've spent as much time as a couple who have been together 5x longer, and while that sounds like it's bad, it's actually not. I care about her a lot and I want to see her succeed and I want to help her - I know it won't be cured, but I think that having some other kind of medication for it will help her feel better in herself. She called me on her break like I asked, she's loving her first day at work as a barista, and told me she really likes the person who is training her. I've never been so happy to hear of her success than today. I asked her to call me so I could ask if she wants to stay over and I'll cook us something and we can have a bath and spend time together and such and she sounded really excited to do that and asked me to go to her mum's for her meds and some other things she needs.

[QUOTE=Legend286;51631917]My life is quite simple, and to be quite honest with you, if she asked to move in with me in a few months I would say yes, because we spend enough time around eachother that we just don't realise. For the time we've been together we've spent as much time as a couple who have been together 5x longer, and while that sounds like it's bad, it's actually not. I care about her a lot and I want to see her succeed and I want to help her - I know it won't be cured, but I think that having some other kind of medication for it will help her feel better in herself. She called me on her break like I asked, she's loving her first day at work as a barista, and told me she really likes the person who is training her. I've never been so happy to hear of her success than today. I asked her to call me so I could ask if she wants to stay over and I'll cook us something and we can have a bath and spend time together and such and she sounded really excited to do that and asked me to go to her mum's for her meds and some other things she needs.[/QUOTE] Then you've got all the materials you need for a healthy relationship if she's willing to accept your help, which it sure sounds like it. You sound like a truly nice, caring person, respectful. Putting yourself on the line to ensure a future with her takes balls. I really hope it works out for you guys, and from everything you've said I see positivity in your future. Best of luck man.

[QUOTE=Aetna;51632372]Then you've got all the materials you need for a healthy relationship if she's willing to accept your help, which it sure sounds like it. You sound like a truly nice, caring person, respectful. Putting yourself on the line to ensure a future with her takes balls. I really hope it works out for you guys, and from everything you've said I see positivity in your future. Best of luck man.[/QUOTE] I think after several relationships full of bullshit, drama, and more recently abusiveness towards me in my last one, it's about time I found someone who actually fits. It's nice to care for and be cared about by someone equally, and without making me change myself in any way, or without forcing me to do things I don't want to do. I won't force her to do anything she doesn't want to do, but I also won't allow her to further worsen her health by making bad decisions, so far there has only been one potentially bad decision but even then I think it wouldn't have been so terrible. She listens to me especially when I simply don't tell her what she should do, but how I feel about the actions she could take regarding something. There was a questionable exchange one time with the weed guy and I expressed my concern regarding a pill he gave her as a gratis (he always gives way more than she pays for with weed, some acquaintance of his was there that time and had other things, he's just not that kind of guy to give a shit I guess) and she listened to me despite voicing that she would like to try everything once or twice and gave it to my roommate for new years (I heard his new years was incredibly eventful, heh, fun for him) but meanwhile we spent ours at a fancy ass hotel in the casino, watched live music, were high as balls after taking bong hits at home, drank free champagne and ate free food and had an amazing night. To be honest the way I see it, yes, I don't mind trying things once or twice either, but safety is important and we both didn't know the origins of that pill. I wouldn't have judged her for taking it either, I just think it's not a good idea especially as her medication basically does the opposite when she smokes too much. I think that as long as she communicates with me as well as she does, there shouldn't be any problems. I should probably begin planning the food which I'll be cooking tonight as she's leaving work in an hour and 20 minutes and I'm guessing it won't take more than 20 mins for her to get here after that.

[quote]You're a bit too young but let's see if a whippersnapper like you is groovy[/quote] How the fuck do I respond to this text? Do I even want to respond to it?

[QUOTE=axemunger;51633026]How the fuck do I respond to this text? Do I even want to respond to it?[/QUOTE] Tell her youll have to be careful in bed, she might break her hip.

[QUOTE=axemunger;51633026]How the fuck do I respond to this text? Do I even want to respond to it?[/QUOTE] Did you catch yourself a cougar? :P

[QUOTE=Legend286;51633369]Did you catch yourself a cougar? :P[/QUOTE] If he did, I'm jealous. When I was going through my online dating phase I attempted to pick up older women and only succeeded twice, and they were only about 10 years older. I was always curious about the experience and figured they'd blow my mind with their abilities (one of which did), but other than that I found that I prefer someone my age. Besides, it's nice having a beautiful 24-year old girlfriend who doesn't have a ton of stretch marks from childbirth.