Sex, Girlfriends and Shit VII: "Power Moves For High Quality Women" - General

[QUOTE=A Glitch;51563199]Guys, I could really use some advice. So after many years of being single I've tried my hand at online dating, I've been talking with somebody and we've agreed to meet up for a date, one of the initial bumps I'm picking up is that she's shy - which is understandable but I'm not the greatest conversations on the first meetups. The only reason I say this is that I'm writing a short paragraph of information on the stuff I like asking open questions etc, and I'm getting a sentence or two back, even when it's coming to organising the date itself. (normally I'd take this as a sign of disinterest but the opening line of her profile is "I'm shy" which is the only thing keeping me trying) I'm thinking of just meeting up for a coffee or something for the first date but if we're both not great at conversations I think we might need a "distraction" as it were (take a tour of somewhere or something?). Any tips for keeping the conversation going on the first meetup? Any suggestions for how to tread carefully and not scare her off?[/QUOTE] Just to update you guys, we're now organising a 3rd date, just seems to be her nature that she's shy/indecisive. [QUOTE=Boss;51564407]Dont be worried about silence just because there's a gap in the conversation doesn't mean you've gotta go out your way to fill it.[/QUOTE] this has been the most useful advice, admittedly i'm bricking it inside every time there's a silence that seems to stretch on for that littttle bit too long but this kept coming back to me, so, seriously, thanks for that little gem. the next bit of advice is, I'm rather crap at texting in between the dates, I want to avoid the "Good morning/how was your day - [I]fine, how was yours?[/I] good." sort of texts, they just seem so...mundane and boring and they'll almost never lead anywhere. Habitually I never text anybody at all with smalltalk sort of stuff because I'd rather talk in person but I want to keep her interested so I'm struggling with what to say in between the dates (which are usually on the weekends)

[QUOTE=Birdman101;51633063]Tell her youll have to be careful in bed, she might break her hip.[/QUOTE] I was going to use this, but I don't think I can. I just don't feel comfortable meeting up with random people online Thanks anyway

Night went perfect with my GF, she loved my food and got really happy with everything. She also really enjoyed her first day at work! She left at half 6 to go get ready for work, and yeah last night was pretty perfect.

[QUOTE=Legend286;51631307]*huge text*[/QUOTE] Wow. Just came in this thread because I was feeling conflicted about my relationship with my GF and read your post. Are you me ? Nearly everything you said can apply to my relationship. Nearly three months ago I started a relationship with a girl from my class whom I fell in love deeply with. She's also bipolar, even tho she self diagnosed (family with bipolar disorder) and more like cyclothymic. Your post hit close to home and we seem to handle things the same way. I love her and want her to feel good and happy but when she has "dips" as you call it I don't really know how to help other than being with her and reassuring her everything is okay. She is sometime impulsive and make small bad decisions I don't really agree with but I try not to be upset with it. One night after a party (she went with some of her friends) she told me someone gave her a pill and she swallowed it without questioning and I felt bad about it, not because I'm anti-drugs, just because it was an unknown pill with god knows what inside and I prefer to quality control everything I take. Like you we haven't been long together but during these 3 months we were together nearly all the time (even at school since we are in the same class) and it feels like we have been together for a really long time. She also has trust issues due to an abusive relationship that lasted 3 years (manipulative asshole that hit her). She's been with many guys before but according to her our relationship is very different, she loves me way more than she ever had loved anyone. Even tho she doesn't like protective BF, she tells me she feels safe with me and that I made her happy, something she did not feel in a long time. Her best friend also told me she was glad she was with me since I was "stable" (not put in that way, real meaning lost in translation) and she needed it. Her friend told me too that it was good to see her smiling again, and seeing how she talked about me when not there, that she really loved me. However when she has her "dips", it hurts to see her sad and depressed, thinking she isn't worth anything. I don't know what to do during these times. When we are together I try to make her feel worthy and try to lift her mood but that's mostly ineffective (or maybe it isn't and she feels a bit better, I dunno). It's way harder when we aren't together, we normally are always chatting on fb but when she isn't feeling alright she cuts off communication (with everyone I suppose) for a day or two but that hurts not being able to talk to her and try to make her feel better. It's conflicting because I love her and want to share things with her but at the same time I have to learn to "let her go" and wait for her to get better. So yeah, she's currently not responding and I'm feeling bad seeing she doesn't want to talk to me. Stay strong friend because bipolar disorder is not an easy piece of cake to handle. And while I'd preferred she wasn't, I still love her more than anything and I will have to learn how not to get hurt when she has her moments.

[QUOTE=autodesknoob;51616082]Ok so i have a question i cant really seem to answer: So we were at a new years party last night with a group of friends of my cousin, at a cute girl's house. I currently live with him and his parents, so all the area is filled with friends and contacts and all from him. We were like 7-8 people. They know each other a long time ago and all the group origins started from two friends who are a couple, and then the others started coming. Well, the party was pretty lit, lots of games, drinks and weed. Never got that fucking drunk and felt that good as that night, became instant friends with all those guys and from drinks to games the things started getting fun. The couple of the the group is very open, and from that group, theres another girl (the one who owned the house) who i saw a couple times at other reunions but never got to talk her too much. Well, shes like a third wheel in the couples relationship, probably trios and all that from time to time. And not gonna lie, kinda liked her since the last reunion. So, i kinda looked after her this party but seemed like she had no interest, so i desisted, and eventually she started making out with the other girl in her boyfriends face. The dude was just happy so i could tell he was into it, and very used to it. The shit got even stranger when the third-wheel girl actually started making out with me. For a moment it seemed out of nowhere, but everyone cheered up for us (yeah we made out in front of everyone). She and everyone else where all like "duuuude read the signs" and then yeah, seems like she did say a couple things pointing in that direction, although her attitude is very neutral and it seemed like she had no interest from moment to moment. Well...after that it was them, the couple making out, then the girls, then the girl with me, then the girls with the girl still holding my hand and derivations from that (i even got enough signs to tell even the guy was into me). Then we all went to the bathroom, and well, the girls started making out and suddenly i realized to myself ".....am i really gonna have a fucking foursome right now?" and to put it into context, i have only have one serious relationship for two years, it ended in the beginning of 2016 and in all year i just dated one girl for a month, thats it, we didnt have sex or anything, so you can tell how after a year without it all the situation seemed like some exploding overcompensation for the lack of it. For my "luck" my cousin got pretty wasted and needed the bathroom, so we all went outside. And, as a good cousin, i stayed with him to make sure he didnt fucking die from all the puke. I stayed for a good hour and then went outside to pick up something warm for him to drink. The couple was sleeping in the owners room, where there were two beds, so they were in one and in the other was the cute girl and her little sister. Outside the bathroom, in the living room, the other guys were sleeping in the floor. So, when i went out the girl was walking towards me and asked if i needed something. Tried to tell her if she had some aspiring or something and i dont know how but i just started making out with her right there. I must admit, i missed all those feelings, even if they were just superficial at that moment. The moment was so hot i even grabbed her hand and just straight up putted it in my pants. She grabbed firmly, and after a minute she laughed a bit and said "come on dude the guys are right there ahah" and yeah, they were like a meter away, sleeping, but they were there. So i laughed it off and went back to my cousin. After that, we all woke up and i started cleaning all the mess. We had breakfast, said goodbye and all. Looked at my phone on my way home and through the party the girl added me on facebook and i added the couple too. Then they added me in a chat group where all the friends were. Thing is, and this is were i wanted to go, the girl is actually pretty cool. Shes nice, living through similar processes, her family was great with me, cute, funny, likes vydia as much as i do and shes also a bi, like me, but i get shes in another state of her life. She broke up a couple months ago with her ex from a toxic relationship and now shes probably looking for fun, sex, all that stuff. I wouldnt say im not at this point, but..is it too silly to fool around with the idea that maybe, from all the illusions of a great night and all the alcohol that was involved in this story, that is not too crazy to think that we could start to know each other better from now on? maybe something in the future...? I dont know, i mean, i dont want to be that innocent and try to give more of a meaning the night deserves, but aside from that, would it be to stupid to start talking with this girl and see what happens? even knowing all the crazy stuff that goes between those three i really dont care..the only person i have actually been jealous about was with my ex and it was after we broke up, because when she started another relationship i still was inlove with her and hurt a lot, but now i really dont give a fuck about all that mambo jumbo, this girl seems actually great. What do you think guys? sorry if i went into TOO much detail, but i cant help it.[/QUOTE] update on this: Kinda dating now with her e.e

[QUOTE=RenegadeCop;51639730]What's the hardest part of moving in with your significant other?[/QUOTE] Having a routine that's fair for both of you. (Dishes, laundry, cooking)

[QUOTE=RenegadeCop;51639730]What's the hardest part of moving in with your significant other?[/QUOTE] when I had a girlfriend move in with me, the main thing was losing pretty much all of my personal space. because I live with my parents, the only space we had to share that was our own was my bedroom, and she wanted some room for her stuff. I had a computer at my desk that had to move so that she had somewhere for her mirror so that she could get ready in the mornings, I had to do some serious rearranging of my guitars so that she could fit in storage for her miscellaneous stuff (underwear, jewelry, various lady things). just about the only thing I had space ready for was her clothes as I have a built in wardrobe and since I wore work uniforms most of the time, I didn't have many other clothes. the trade off for that was that I got to spend so much more of my time with my best friend and partner, we could chill out and relax and watch TV or a movie, or just go and jump in one of our cars and go somewhere. shame it all ended the way it did but I wouldn't trade that experience for anything.

Um i could need some advice. My friends girlfriend broke up with him for the second time and he keeps crying about what to do abut he won't listen. So basically he is an idiot when, he goes for other girls when he is already with her and I keentelling him to fucking decide and when he "suspects" that she do he same he goes apeshit and they fight where he pushes her. He is a fucking idiot. He begged her that he will be better and she told Him "if you want me to change my mind so we can work things out, go buy a ring and ask my father" and he does so and they talk again. 2 days ago they fight again and he pushes and tosses her again and she had enough of it and I totally agree with her. He behaves like an idiot and then cry about her leaving him. What should I tell him? He is my best friend. I'm getting tired of him calling me about help when he refuses to listen. I even told him it's his fault and I totally agree with her decision. Thing is he moved to Norway so I can't be with him and I'm pretty worried he will do something retarded.

Get better friends

Wait a second. That he manhandles her is bad enough, that he's insecure is also worrying, but then she broke up with him and then told him "get a ring and marry me"? This sounds like some daft slice of life drama. Get him to sort himself out, if he's left the country he's not bothering you or her. Do you know why he went to Norway?

[QUOTE=cyclocius;51644485]Wait a second. That he manhandles her is bad enough, that he's insecure is also worrying, but then she broke up with him and then told him "get a ring and marry me"? This sounds like some daft slice of life drama. Get him to sort himself out, if he's left the country he's not bothering you or her. Do you know why he went to Norway?[/QUOTE] I would guess she wanted to see if he means it, I know everything sounds so silly. He lives and works there and she's from Norway, they've been together for more than 3 years. Also the post above "get better friends" are you serious?

Your friend is a moron and while no one can really tell you to get better friends, we can tell you that your friend's stupidity is not your problem and should never be your problem. If he wants to act like a child, then that's on him and most of the time your words will hold literally no sway, especially if you're inexperienced to the point of having to ask for advice yourself. Let him work out his own issues like an adult. Otherwise he'll become reliant on someone else to do it for him.

[QUOTE=Bucketboy;51644667]I would guess she wanted to see if he means it, I know everything sounds so silly. He lives and works there and she's from Norway, they've been together for more than 3 years. Also the post above "get better friends" are you serious?[/QUOTE] I meant it as a joke, although honestly I get that he's your best friend, but he's the cause of his problems and it's his responsibility, you can't really do anything about it, nor should you share some of his burdens

I know it's not my problem and I'm not sharing his burden, most retarded thing he did is lay his hands on her and he somewhat deserves the consequences because I told him many times to behave like a normal human being but I gave up in the end. When he talks about what happend I just want to be harsh on him like in "you caused this now you have to accept it" but I don't want to make it worse for him. I just let him talk and I listen I guess.

If he's hurt her, then he's beyond chastising from a friend at this point. You either let him sort it out himself or eventually the police will.

absolutely no relationship is obligatory. Love and trust has to be earn and you cannot learn for others, let them make their mistakes if they are blind to the point they dont see it. I had a friend that didnt get me at all when i was going through a hard phase, he was mean and dumb, so i got away from him and he knew i did that. After a while i can still talk to him and everythings good, but if you arent comfortable with someone...who says you HAVE to endure that? friendship goes both ways.

I'm not sure how you could call someone who is physically abusive to their romantic partners your best friend. Then again, I guess it's easier to ignore when you're not the one being abused.

[QUOTE=Bucketboy;51644768]I know it's not my problem and I'm not sharing his burden, most retarded thing he did is lay his hands on her and he somewhat deserves the consequences because I told him many times to behave like a normal human being but I gave up in the end. When he talks about what happend I just want to be harsh on him like in "you caused this now you have to accept it" but I don't want to make it worse for him. I just let him talk and I listen I guess.[/QUOTE] Why are you still friends with someone who physically abuses women

I remember one saturday at my old job, the workshop manager was chatting with myself and my colleague about how things used to be here a couple of decades ago with regards to that sort of thing. he told me there were a couple of instances of mechanics finding out that one of their colleagues had hit their wife or girlfriend or something, and every other bloke in the place would lock the doors and batter the guy. whilst I can't say I'd go as far as battering a cunt with tools, if I found out that one of my friends was hitting his partner, there might be a punch or two back at them.

Man, I dunno about you guys, but I do everything I can to avoid situations where I run into exes. Just don't like it. There's a few I'm really cool with and we get along well, but some of them it's like an open wound on their end, or my end, or both. Just sucks. My girlfriend is fucking awesome and treats me so well and I never want to hurt her - but it takes every ounce of my self control to not send a text I shouldn't sometimes. Or to not reply to the ones sent to me... I figured by the time I hit my mid-20's my hormones would chill the fuck out but NOPE.

[QUOTE=Guy Mannly;51646097]I'm not sure how you could call someone who is physically abusive to their romantic partners your best friend. Then again, I guess it's easier to ignore when you're not the one being abused.[/QUOTE] Because we've known each other for over 15 years. Then again he lives in Norway and i'm in Sweden, would have been different if he was actually here and also i just found out about the physicall part because he told me about it. Apparently she was physicall with him too and please, don't even think that i'm ignoring it because he's my friend. I condemnd him as soon i found out about this.

i get really depressed and mad after sex maybe it is because i cannot go fast at first (when i lost my virginity a month ago) i came really fast, but now i've slowed my strokes down (so like one in-out every 3 seconds). even then, i still have to pull out and take a small break from time to time. i keep doing this until my girlfriend makes herself come and then i speed up and i come along with her. i just wish i could stay at that speed for more than two strokes before having to pull out and calm myself down (or just come early) also how the fuck do you do missionary without having to hold yourself up in a pushup position? it just seems really claustrophobic and i want to seem more in control as opposed to gravity and my dick making me not have fun at all. i just get sad because i feel worthless after sex. it's not because i think my girlfriend doesn't like it (i have expressed these thoughts to her and she says she feels great when we have sex, and one time she could barely move her legs afterward so that's good). it's just because i want to last longer and make the experience better because now it just sort of makes me feel weak

I have your same problem, I can cum too fast for my taste My solution was to cum earlier before sex (like 30 seconds before penetration so I have enough time to put a condom on and keep it hard enough to penetrate, after that the vagina keeps me erect all the way till I cum again 10 minutes later) but it's not the best way I feel

Practice, my friends. Sex doesn't end when you cum. After you're done, please her a bit with your fingers or mouth until you're ready to go again. Second time will feel just as good, and you'll last a lot longer.

[QUOTE=dcalde78;51646139]I remember one saturday at my old job, the workshop manager was chatting with myself and my colleague about how things used to be here a couple of decades ago with regards to that sort of thing. he told me there were a couple of instances of mechanics finding out that one of their colleagues had hit their wife or girlfriend or something, and every other bloke in the place would lock the doors and batter the guy. whilst I can't say I'd go as far as battering a cunt with tools, if I found out that one of my friends was hitting his partner, there might be a punch or two back at them.[/QUOTE] That sounds like it would end up with him taking it out on her even more, calling the police is probably the better option.

[QUOTE=NixNax123;51646712]i get really depressed and mad after sex maybe it is because i cannot go fast at first (when i lost my virginity a month ago) i came really fast, but now i've slowed my strokes down (so like one in-out every 3 seconds). even then, i still have to pull out and take a small break from time to time. i keep doing this until my girlfriend makes herself come and then i speed up and i come along with her. i just wish i could stay at that speed for more than two strokes before having to pull out and calm myself down (or just come early) also how the fuck do you do missionary without having to hold yourself up in a pushup position? it just seems really claustrophobic and i want to seem more in control as opposed to gravity and my dick making me not have fun at all. i just get sad because i feel worthless after sex. it's not because i think my girlfriend doesn't like it (i have expressed these thoughts to her and she says she feels great when we have sex, and one time she could barely move her legs afterward so that's good). it's just because i want to last longer and make the experience better because now it just sort of makes me feel weak[/QUOTE] i wish i had that seeing as i dont climax at all no matter what i do

My problem solved itself. Turns out 4 hours is the magic number :sex101:

[QUOTE=NixNax123;51646712]i get really depressed and mad after sex maybe it is because i cannot go fast at first (when i lost my virginity a month ago) i came really fast, but now i've slowed my strokes down (so like one in-out every 3 seconds). even then, i still have to pull out and take a small break from time to time. i keep doing this until my girlfriend makes herself come and then i speed up and i come along with her. i just wish i could stay at that speed for more than two strokes before having to pull out and calm myself down (or just come early) also how the fuck do you do missionary without having to hold yourself up in a pushup position? it just seems really claustrophobic and i want to seem more in control as opposed to gravity and my dick making me not have fun at all. i just get sad because i feel worthless after sex. it's not because i think my girlfriend doesn't like it (i have expressed these thoughts to her and she says she feels great when we have sex, and one time she could barely move her legs afterward so that's good). it's just because i want to last longer and make the experience better because now it just sort of makes me feel weak[/QUOTE] I personally kneel upright, knees pointed outward to get my junk in position for their hips to fit within mine, and hold their legs up from behind the knees or by their ankles. Gives me a good angle to thrust at, and the view's amazing. I'm sure it would be for my GF as well if I wasn't a fat fuck :^) As for cumming too quickly, I try not to flex my penis too much when I'm thrusting. I do it in spurts; I'll flex hard for a couple of seconds, then relax it for a minute or two. I can last quite a while when I do this. It might not work for you (some women have mentioned that I'm harder than other men, so idk if that'd effect how well this technique actually works or not, personally didn't even know variance in erection hardness was a thing) but it's worth a shot regardless.

youre gonna have to elaborate on that positon

sex is fun when you're 6'7 and your girlfriend is 5'2