Sex, Girlfriends and Shit VII: "Power Moves For High Quality Women" - General

I dunno if I really feel "used" though, I mean to me it's just a little harmless fun, and we both enjoy it. Even when I'm just doing stuff for her, I enjoy the time. Like it's fine with me if all she wants sex-wise is occasional drunken hookups. I think we can reasonably do that as friends and not have it be too complicated. I'd feel a hell of a lot more "used" if she asked me for rides all over the city or wanted me to pay for her food and stuff all the time. But sex acts are easy and free. I just kinda need to know where her head is when she repeatedly initiates these hookups then apologizes and basically tells me they should never have happened. I'm pretty sure neither of us want a serious committed relationship with the other or anything. But I guess I should ask her for some answers next time we're talking. I think I'm entitled to know what's going on.

So I managed to open up a conversation with my ex. I asked about going to see a live band play now she's old enough, she doesn't hate the idea but she's unsure. However she did tell me if we did meet again she wants to give it some time untill we do, I don't want to keep pushing it but I know we could sort out meeting. The only thing is, I don't think it would be comfortable going on to drink like that when we're still apart. If we do arrange some meeting, do you think it would be wise nearer or possibly on the day to talk about going out as a couple. Any advice is welcome.

Is this your ex from a couple days ago? I'd say get some space if so.

[QUOTE=psychojake;49703388]Is this your ex from a couple days ago? I'd say get some space if so.[/QUOTE] Yeah we broke up Friday, how long do you think I should leave it? We normally talk constantly but it's obviously awkward now. I've managed to get her to think about meeting so should i give her the rest of the week to think?

Loofiloo, everyone has already given you great advice. The one thing that is super bugging me is: did she really DUI home that night? Did you stop at 3 beers or did you have a hell of a lot more to drink. People who DUI piss me off

[QUOTE=Jame's;49703414]Yeah we broke up Friday, how long do you think I should leave it? We normally talk constantly but it's obviously awkward now. I've managed to get her to think about meeting so should i give her the rest of the week to think?[/QUOTE] If you're both hurting, seeing each other or going to a concert together might not be a great idea. I mean, she's your ex, not your girlfriend.

[QUOTE=Jame's;49703414]Yeah we broke up Friday, how long do you think I should leave it? We normally talk constantly but it's obviously awkward now. I've managed to get her to think about meeting so should i give her the rest of the week to think?[/QUOTE] How long should you leave it alone for? Forever, preferably. Theres a reason you 2 broke up, even if she broke up with you because of bullshit reason. Thats not a relationship you want to immediately charge back into, it all. Dont talk to your ex. Ever. Unless you forgot your xbox or your favorite t shirt at your ex's place, dont ever comtact your ex.

[QUOTE=Cyke Lon bee;49704793]How long should you leave it alone for? Forever, preferably. Theres a reason you 2 broke up, even if she broke up with you because of bullshit reason. Thats not a relationship you want to immediately charge back into, it all. Dont talk to your ex. Ever. Unless you forgot your xbox or your favorite t shirt at your ex's place, dont ever comtact your ex.[/QUOTE] Uh Im still friends with heaps of my Ex's. I mean sometimes its unwise to depending on what happened but if you act like an adult you can still be friends.

Tried that, didn't work out for 2 of my exs. Granted one went batshit nuts and the other was a mormon chick who married a guy with [I]serious[/I] trust issues. [I]oh yeah i bet you're real happy is this the fairy tale marriage you were convinced it'd be when you got engaged after a month?[/I]

[QUOTE=loopoo;49704210]Loofiloo, everyone has already given you great advice. The one thing that is super bugging me is: did she really DUI home that night? Did you stop at 3 beers or did you have a hell of a lot more to drink. People who DUI piss me off[/QUOTE] I kinda doubt it. I mean I'm pretty sure she drank less than me, and I didn't drink any more than 4. And the drinking stopped when the fooling around started.

[QUOTE=Cyke Lon bee;49704793]How long should you leave it alone for? Forever, preferably. Theres a reason you 2 broke up, even if she broke up with you because of bullshit reason. Thats not a relationship you want to immediately charge back into, it all. Dont talk to your ex. Ever. Unless you forgot your xbox or your favorite t shirt at your ex's place, dont ever comtact your ex.[/QUOTE] Do people actually do this? Unless the breakup was on genuinely bad terms I wouldn't go out of my way to cease contact ~forever. If a relationship just wasn't the way then I think two mature people can move past it and still enjoy each others' company without getting hung up on emotions. Just my 2c, it's a bit brash to tell the dude stop don't pass go etc. She might just feel that it's too soon to be spending time with him, or that he might want to get back with her (and so quickly after a breakup, I'd probably be hesitant too given that thought)

So the latest news is she's removed me from social media, I take it she wants to just try and forget about me for now. I messaged her stating I want to keep to myself for a few days but I would appreciate it if you didn't try to block me completely. I think it's all I can do right now, I'm thinking I'll message her on the weekend to try and talk.

[QUOTE=Milkdairy;49706391]Do people actually do this? Unless the breakup was on genuinely bad terms I wouldn't go out of my way to cease contact ~forever. If a relationship just wasn't the way then I think two mature people can move past it and still enjoy each others' company without getting hung up on emotions. Just my 2c, it's a bit brash to tell the dude stop don't pass go etc. She might just feel that it's too soon to be spending time with him, or that he might want to get back with her (and so quickly after a breakup, I'd probably be hesitant too given that thought)[/QUOTE] my first gf left me for a raging cunt and broke my heart, I spoke to her when I went through the airport here on my way south in November (she boarded my flight), before that it was about this time last year when I needed her to sign paperwork related to a housing application. we don't speak any more. second gf ended on mutual terms, neither of us seemed really into it after about 5 months but we still post glorious memes on each other's facebook, we speak occasionally too it's entirely dependent on circumstances and the individual.

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[QUOTE=Milkdairy;49706391]Do people actually do this? Unless the breakup was on genuinely bad terms I wouldn't go out of my way to cease contact ~forever. If a relationship just wasn't the way then I think two mature people can move past it and still enjoy each others' company without getting hung up on emotions. Just my 2c, it's a bit brash to tell the dude stop don't pass go etc. She might just feel that it's too soon to be spending time with him, or that he might want to get back with her (and so quickly after a breakup, I'd probably be hesitant too given that thought)[/QUOTE] Sure, you can have a decent friendship with your ex's very easily assuming that the both of you are 2 mature and fully sane adults. Obviously thats not always the case, and if it is, is it worth it? To me, it's not worth the potential stress or heart ache to my current GF by me talking to an ex. I trust my girlfriend fully and completely and she is the same way with me, but I wouldn't talk to my ex out of respect for her.

[QUOTE=Jame's;49706626]So the latest news is she's removed me from social media, I take it she wants to just try and forget about me for now. I messaged her stating I want to keep to myself for a few days but I would appreciate it if you didn't try to block me completely. I think it's all I can do right now, I'm thinking I'll message her on the weekend to try and talk.[/QUOTE] It sucks but man you really gotta just hop off her nuts. [editline]10th February 2016[/editline] She's giving you some pretty clear signals dude

[QUOTE=Jame's;49706626]So the latest news is she's removed me from social media, I take it she wants to just try and forget about me for now. I messaged her stating I want to keep to myself for a few days but I would appreciate it if you didn't try to block me completely. I think it's all I can do right now, I'm thinking I'll message her on the weekend to try and talk.[/QUOTE] Just leave it buddy. It's done.

[QUOTE=Jame's;49706626]So the latest news is she's removed me from social media, I take it she wants to just try and forget about me for now. I messaged her stating I want to keep to myself for a few days but I would appreciate it if you didn't try to block me completely. I think it's all I can do right now, I'm thinking I'll message her on the weekend to try and talk.[/QUOTE] Dood you're done. You trying to talk to her any further is just harassing her. Man up and move on because you pushing this is just straight up inconsiderate to her. She's very bluntly and plainly laid out that she wants no contact with you what so ever, and thats her decision to make, not yours.

I think i got fucked by gifts and shit. February is valentines day, march is our anniversary, and april is her birthday. fuck me right in the ass, so many presents to buy.

[QUOTE=RidingKeys;49713198]fuck me right in the ass[/QUOTE] that could be one of her presents, getting to do that

[QUOTE=RidingKeys;49713198]I think i got fucked by gifts and shit. February is valentines day, march is our anniversary, and april is her birthday. fuck me right in the ass, so many presents to buy.[/QUOTE] It's all about research and planning man, last year I scheduled a tinder date with my now girlfriend for valentines day so I've been lucky enough to combine our anniversary with valentines day festivities As anyone with a birthday on christmas can tell you, you generally get less presents from both events being on the same day. That's the logic I am aiming for, for economic consideration

[QUOTE=Squidman;49713914]It's all about research and planning man, last year I scheduled a tinder date with my now girlfriend for valentines day so I've been lucky enough to combine our anniversary with valentines day festivities As anyone with a birthday on christmas can tell you, you generally get less presents from both events being on the same day. That's the logic I am aiming for, for economic consideration[/QUOTE] "We got together on the most romantic day of the year..." -swoon- But in reality its like "heh hehhh thats one less present day to take into account, one less date to forget, fukin genius."

[QUOTE=Jame's;49703414]Yeah we broke up Friday, how long do you think I should leave it? We normally talk constantly but it's obviously awkward now. I've managed to get her to think about meeting so should i give her the rest of the week to think?[/QUOTE] You leave it until you've moved on. "Moved on" means not needing her and not complaining about how you can't do normal things like go to social events without her there. Based on your last post, it sounds like she realized you can't set these limits yourself and is setting them for you.

[QUOTE=Guy Mannly;49714279]You leave it until you've moved on. "Moved on" means not needing her and not complaining about how you can't do normal things like go to social events without her there. Based on your last post, it sounds like she realized you can't set these limits yourself and is setting them for you.[/QUOTE] Guy is a winner as always

me and the ex have been chatting about various things this evening, we got onto the topic of sex and whatnot, and she tells me this [quote]Your problem isn't what to do when you manage to get a girl into bed, it's the getting the girl into bed[/quote]

So that girl and I talked a bit yesterday about how we both should really get to know each other better first before either of us consider anything serious. I agreed and I'm completely clear on it, basically we just want to feel this out a bit more before we dive into something we regret. She's still interested in me, as when I asked her "so are we still on for food Friday?" (I suggested making reservations for a nice place a few days ago), she said "hell yes". And she got a joystick preloaded with retro games and we're going to play Galaga together and we both swear we're going to beat the hell out of eachother. Just to clarify, we're still talking, not just friends. Seems like I'm in a good place with her right now. Everything that happened, happened, and I've learned to put that in the past because theres no sense dwelling over it. Learned a lot from all this. Thanks for the help, guys. Wish me luck with all this. haha

[QUOTE=dcalde78;49715368]me and the ex have been chatting about various things this evening, we got onto the topic of sex and whatnot, and she tells me this[/QUOTE] alright well that sounds like you know what you need to work on at least

So me and my girlfriend, the parapalegic one, were going to do something for valentines day, but her doctors appointment at a hospital 2 states away was reschedueled for monday morning, so she has to leave early on Sunday. She wants to stay in and rest the day before, so anyone have any suggestions on something ~~romantic I can do?

how parapalegic are we talking

Ahh bugger me backwards guys. So she messaged me yesterday morning telling me to have a nice day and that there are people here for me. We talked for a bit but I can't do it, I'm so Confused right now I just want to try and forget about her for a little while until my tests are over. I'll tell you what, it does turn your whole world upside down. I've gotten used to smoking a joint and listening to music to chill out up until last weekend. I tried doing it Saturday but it made me just panic, I don't want to risk it again. It's so tough resisting striking up a conversation, I know it won't do me any favours.