Sex, Girlfriends and Shit VII: "Power Moves For High Quality Women" - General

[QUOTE=S31-Syntax;49804774]If it's first bday, keep it small but thoughtful. My gf's last birthday was our third together, so I went big. Got her a rifle.[/QUOTE] True MURICAN love :v:

[QUOTE=RenegadeCop;49804974]It probably doesn't cost Flamingoes 50 dollars for one bottle of temporary self-esteem booster[/QUOTE] I'm not saying all makeup is good, I'm saying the concept is sound and cannot possibly be sexist. If your girl is spending 50 bones a pop on containers of makeup stuff, then there is another problem at play. Obviously there is a line before it becomes excessive, I'm saying that someone using makeup isn't suffering from the sexism of society, they're doing what is biologically programmed to make themselves look more attractive. Men shave, use hair products, some use makeup, some pluck eyebrows, wear nice clothes, bathe in nice smelling stuff, and use cologne. But point me to anyone who looks at that and calls that sexist. If women using makeup or related things is sexist and shouldn't happen, then men shouldn't use them either. Equality, right?

How do you deal with nervousness?

[QUOTE=S31-Syntax;49805030]I'm not saying all makeup is good, I'm saying the concept is sound and cannot possibly be sexist. If your girl is spending 50 bones a pop on containers of makeup stuff, then there is another problem at play. Obviously there is a line before it becomes excessive, I'm saying that someone using makeup isn't suffering from the sexism of society, they're doing what is biologically programmed to make themselves look more attractive. Men shave, use hair products, some use makeup, some pluck eyebrows, wear nice clothes, bathe in nice smelling stuff, and use cologne. But point me to anyone who looks at that and calls that sexist. If women using makeup or related things is sexist and shouldn't happen, then men shouldn't use them either. Equality, right?[/QUOTE] it's sexist because only women are encouraged to wear make-up, and risk getting mocked when they don't. it's not trying to look good that makes it sexist, it's the pointless double standard

I need to learn to talk to strangers. I made an okcupid account and a girl mesaaged me within a few minutes of making my account, and I was pretty nervous and took a while to think of a reply, doesn't help that she didn't started with a question :v The conversation kind of took off after a few messages but I think that if I have to talk to a stranger I would not be able to think of a reply for 30 minutes, what can I do to relieve the anxiety and be more spontaneus?

[QUOTE=Zukriuchen;49805099]it's sexist because only women are encouraged to wear make-up, and risk getting mocked when they don't. it's not trying to look good that makes it sexist, it's the pointless double standard[/QUOTE] I think makeup is okay as itself, but the sexism starts when it is socially requiered to wear makeup and high heels on certain situations.

[QUOTE=Disseminate;49804865]I think they're exactly the same as makeup. With makeup you spend money (weekly or monthly) and apply it daily. With plastic surgery you spend a lot of money and apply it once and go for checkups every few years. Both are body modification. That being said (and this is probably an unpopular opinion) I think makeup/surgery is inherently sexist - I don't believe you can apply makeup "for yourself". Yeah, you might feel better when applying it, but that's because it's been ingrained in the vast majority of people that self-worth is based on physical appearance (tons of people valuate other people based on it). It's not like we can easily change this in ourselves, and it's nobody but society's fault if you feel better doing makeup/surgery, but it's something to be aware of.[/QUOTE] I'm personally a huge makeup addict, and for me, I partly enjoy it just because I can change my style on a daily basis and reflect how I feel through it. The "applying it for yourself" part has to do with feeling more confident because of your physical attractiveness, which definitely ties back into social expectations. I agree that the reasoning behind it is based on our social worth depending on our physical appearance. It is definitely an issue of sexism because for women, success and our perceptions of our ability to succeed are based much more heavily on physical attractiveness. When it comes to employability, women are more heavily judged based on their levels of attractiveness. There have also been some studies showing that women applying for "masculine" jobs tend to be judged in the opposite direction - attractive women are viewed as more "feminine" and less capable for these jobs ("beauty is beastly" effect). On the other hand, men are judged more based on interview performance. [url=http://nw-assets.s3.amazonaws.com/pdf/NW-General-Public-Beauty-Poll.pdf]Here's[/url] a survey that addressed some of these issues. [editline]24th February 2016[/editline] [QUOTE=S31-Syntax;49805030]Obviously there is a line before it becomes excessive, I'm saying that someone using makeup isn't suffering from the sexism of society, they're doing what is biologically programmed to make themselves look more attractive.[/QUOTE] The act itself of putting on makeup isn't the issue. The issue is how society necessitates that behavior for women to succeed.

[QUOTE=Zukriuchen;49805099]it's sexist because only women are encouraged to wear make-up, and [B]risk getting mocked when they don't.[/B] it's not trying to look good that makes it sexist, it's the pointless double standard[/QUOTE] I've never seen that happen TBH. Is it something that is common? From what I've seen it's often the opposite, people saying women who wear lots of make-up do it because they would be ugly without it, that kind of thing.

[QUOTE=Solodris;49804446]The love of my life's birthday is coming up, this is my first girlfriend so does anyone have any tips on what to give her?[/QUOTE] If its the first Bday you've 2 have spent together, keep it small and simple, but thoughtful. A dozen (good) roses and a personalized card never fails, but you could buy her an inexpensive bracelet or necklace as well. If she wants to spend her birthday with you alone, taking her somewhere nice to dinner (longhorn or any other chain restaurant doesn't count) and some flowers and a card is a good idea. Don't go all out. My girlfriends birthday is coming up so I'm making her a ring out of some nice wood I have leftover from another project. [editline]24th February 2016[/editline] [QUOTE=JohanGS;49805036]How do you deal with nervousness?[/QUOTE] Just talk to people, it fades over time. Getting a job in retail helps as well. You'll be awkward for the first few months but you'll start to make friends and what not eventually. You're not gonna get over your nervousness by sitting at home reading self help guides; the best way to get rid of it is to just get out into the world and talk to people. Find a local club or join a gang.

[QUOTE=Cosa8888;49805133]I think makeup is okay as itself, but the sexism starts when it is [B]socially requiered to wear makeup and high heels on certain situations.[/B][/QUOTE] And I'm socially required to wear slacks and dress shoes when I go to work/wedding/other not casual event. In a lot of social events, [I]especially[/I] super public and/or televised things, men will at the very least have some kind of makeup to even their complexion in addition to having their hair done, beard well kept if applicable, dress shoes/nice clothes. I honestly don't understand how any of you can say that women are pressured all the time about their appearance and men aren't. Does it happen to a far different degree? Yes. but it does happen a lot. If I'm going to a party and I'm breaking out really bad, I get my GF's help in using some kind of mild concealer to at least make it less obvious.

[QUOTE=Cosa8888;49805121]I need to learn to talk to strangers. I made an okcupid account and a girl mesaaged me within a few minutes of making my account, and I was pretty nervous and took a while to think of a reply, doesn't help that she didn't started with a question :v The conversation kind of took off after a few messages but I think that if I have to talk to a stranger I would not be able to think of a reply for 30 minutes, what can I do to relieve the anxiety and be more spontaneus?[/QUOTE] Keep your messages short and simple. If you respond with an essay, it's just going to convolute the conversation. The nice thing about dating websites is that you've got time between messages to think of a witty or funny reply, just don't overthink it. Be yourself and see where it takes you.

I wear makeup cuz I don't like lookin at my acne or skin issues so idk I'm not wearing it b/c I think someone's gonna be attracted. I feel better physically if I don't constantly look tired in the mirror. I'm also sick a lot. When I put makeup on, I appear less sick to myself and I'm able to fake it til I make it through the day. I can't say I've never worn makeup to attract someone else but I'm pretty sure like 90% of the time I'm wearing it to trick myself into thinking I'm feeling better than I am and it works as a placebo.

[QUOTE=RenegadeCop;49804974]It probably doesn't cost Flamingoes 50 dollars for one bottle of temporary self-esteem booster[/QUOTE] real flamingos will get it for a better price and most likely know when to use it, making it last way more. unlike those #FAKEFLAMMINGOS.

Also more expensive makeup can be much better quality and is less likely to give you... unpleasant results. I don't have the money for that shit but I can understand why someone would want something of a certain quality or make.

it is still purely optional and no one should be judged for wearing or not wearing it. you should be judged however if you made an waful choice of colors, like anything else aesthetically-wise.

Would be nice if that's how it worked.

[QUOTE=Pascall;49805481]I wear makeup cuz I don't like lookin at my acne or skin issues so idk[/QUOTE] Same here, pretty much. Most days I wear very light makeup unless my skin is acting up. The issue is that since so many women wear makeup, we think that any skin imperfections we have are abnormal - lots of people look more "tired" without makeup, but we only consider it abnormal because wearing makeup is the norm. [editline]24th February 2016[/editline] [QUOTE=Pascall;49805599]Also more expensive makeup can be much better quality and is less likely to give you... unpleasant results. I don't have the money for that shit but I can understand why someone would want something of a certain quality or make.[/QUOTE] For me, just wearing primer under my foundation has stopped me from breaking out because of it. The primer I use is just a cheap drugstore brand as well.

after breaking up i`ve been on shitty porn sites and little by little i started sexting with another person. After sending one video, i realized i had an old video i didnt remember. It was me and my ex, playing along naked in her apartment, probably after sex or something. I was pocking her butt with an old xmas sock on my foot while she smiled and tried to fight back. Dammit it hit me hard. We looked so happy and inloved (probably blinded by nostalgia now) and i felt just disgusted for sending a fucking video to a stranger i dont even care. I do have a question though. After that rollercoaster of feels i questioned myself for having the video. Is cute, and a surprise, but i can imagine her feeling uncomfortable knowing i have that kind of material (she knew i was recording but probably doesnt remember/care), even so if shes going out with someone or something, i mean, i dont really have the right of having it (not like i ever had it but you get what i mean). I have pics of her in intimate situations too but nothing close to what i described. Should i delete it? i think i will.

the only thing you shouldn't do(unless you really dont care about her) is to upload it somewhere without her consent(wich of course you lack). other than that, if it bothers you to have it delete it. if not, keep it.

FWB broke it off with me but I still have her Netflix logged in on my computer, you'd better believe I'm not giving that up ;)

[QUOTE=Metaru;49810590]the only thing you shouldn't do(unless you really dont care about her) is to upload it somewhere without her consent(wich of course you lack). other than that, if it bothers you to have it delete it. if not, keep it.[/QUOTE] No matter how little you care about others, spreading photos you have been sent in confidence by a girlfriend or whatever should never be shared with others, no matter what they did to you. Even if they did exactly the same to you, go to the police, not lowering your standards and doing the same. I deleted all photos I had from exes and such, no need to keep those things. If you are ready to remove photos, you are ready to move on.

I'd remove intimate photos because it's just a respectful thing to do.

[QUOTE=Cyberuben;49810828]No matter how little you care about others, spreading photos you have been sent in confidence by a girlfriend or whatever should never be shared with others, no matter what they did to you. Even if they did exactly the same to you, go to the police, not lowering your standards and doing the same. I deleted all photos I had from exes and such, no need to keep those things. If you are ready to remove photos, you are ready to move on.[/QUOTE] some people simply don't care, hence why half of the amateur porn exists, and while we might condone it, if he doesnt care there is nothing we can do other than provide a sugestion. I still keep some content from my exs because well, I can. if I ever feel like erasing it, then I will.

[QUOTE=S31-Syntax;49805452]I honestly don't understand how any of you can say that women are pressured all the time about their appearance and men aren't.[/QUOTE] who the fuck even said this? christ, i'm so tired of this idiotic trend on fp of assuming that if someone defends something, they [I]must[/I] be attacking the opposite side. get real. and lay off the persecution complex.

Felt pretty great to walk into our living room on Sunday and have this exchange with my girlfriend: Me: I have a proposal for you. Her: Uh...go on... Me: Let's get a pizza...then fuck. Her: That sounds great. And so it happened. We got a XXL half and half Papa John's pizza. A nice end to the weekend. Living with your SO gives you some nice freedom...such as walking in and proposing pizza and sex.

Update 3 that no one cares about probably GF spent the night for the first time, we did some stuff, everything is good. She seems to be over her fear of contact or intimacy or whatever it was, because she was just happy and didn't seem hesitant or shaky or anything. All good. Woke up at 8, got out of bed at 12. Now I'm eating chipotle. Good Thursday.

[QUOTE=Dominic0904;49811304]Felt pretty great to walk into our living room on Sunday and have this exchange with my girlfriend: Me: I have a proposal for you. Her: Uh...go on... Me: Let's get a pizza...then fuck. Her: That sounds great. And so it happened. We got a XXL half and half Papa John's pizza. A nice end to the weekend. Living with your SO gives you some nice freedom...such as walking in and proposing pizza and sex.[/QUOTE] Least-possible-reason sex is the best sex. GF and I fucked a while ago 'cause she had to change out of her pajama-pants to go to the store and since her pants were off anyway, she figured 'might as well'.

This probably seems like a really weird request for advice, but does anyone have any tips on [I]reducing[/I] sex drive? I feel like it gets in the way.

Honestly staying really busy with studying, video games, and hanging with friends complete halts my libido. So I guess find ways to distract yourself?

jerk off more