Sex, Girlfriends and Shit VII: "Power Moves For High Quality Women"
5,001 replies, posted
don't
[QUOTE=_Axel;50633475]Apparently this week was supposed to be her "off the pill" week but nothing happened. [/QUOTE]
I'm not a women but is it really that bad to keep taking the pill? Of course it would be a good idea to have an "off the pill" occasionally but does it really matter if it only happens once/twice a year? My ex used to do that and she was so relieved that she didn't have to deal with a period every month, and I was glad as well.
[QUOTE=thermobaric;50638490]I'm not a women but is it really that bad to keep taking the pill? Of course it would be a good idea to have an "off the pill" occasionally but does it really matter if it only happens once/twice a year? My ex used to do that and she was so relieved that she didn't have to deal with a period every month, and I was glad as well.[/QUOTE]
I have no idea but being off the pill is part of her prescription, 3 weeks on 1 week off.
[QUOTE=thermobaric;50638490]I'm not a women but is it really that bad to keep taking the pill? Of course it would be a good idea to have an "off the pill" occasionally but does it really matter if it only happens once/twice a year? My ex used to do that and she was so relieved that she didn't have to deal with a period every month, and I was glad as well.[/QUOTE]
IIRC, the purpose of the placebo week is to mimic a normal cycle, and presumably also to prevent a complete suppression of the woman's own sex hormone production. It's not absolutely necessary (at least with monophasic pills) but you probably wouldn't want to have perpetually elevated levels of estrogen/progesterone.
[QUOTE=psychojake;50636897]On vacation back in the same town, same condo I went to with my ex last year. It feels super weird since that was one of the last super happy memories I had with her before things fell apart. Sleeping in the same bed we shared so long ago feels so strange.
Dunno how to handle these feelings, since I still think about her pretty often still. We broke up 9 months ago and haven't talked since November.
Mostly just a vent post, but any advice would be great. Should I reach out and talk to her as a friend or is this just nostalgia talking?[/QUOTE]
Never talk to an ex unless you're trying to get your favorite hoodie back. You guys broke up for a reason. Don't try and rekindle that shit just because you can only remember the good.
[QUOTE=psychojake;50636897]On vacation back in the same town, same condo I went to with my ex last year. It feels super weird since that was one of the last super happy memories I had with her before things fell apart. Sleeping in the same bed we shared so long ago feels so strange.
Dunno how to handle these feelings, since I still think about her pretty often still. We broke up 9 months ago and haven't talked since November.
Mostly just a vent post, but any advice would be great. Should I reach out and talk to her as a friend or is this just nostalgia talking?[/QUOTE]
Don't. Please. Don't. As others have said, nothing good ever comes from that and the bad outweighed the good and that's why you would break up in the first place.
[QUOTE=RenegadeCop;50639318]Do it.
Best case: You make a new good friend
Worst case: I guess your feeling may get hurt for a little bit but then you get over it later? I dunno, I can't really think of anything THAT bad that comes from trying to be friends with someone. Rejection I guess?
If it doesn't work out, move on. No biggie! She isn't an ex from hell or anything.
I'm facebook friends with an ex and it turns out well. She posts video game memes, I like them, and life goes on.[/QUOTE]
Literally the worst advice you could give. The doods clearly not looking for a friend when he's being nostalgic about sleeping in the same bed as his ex.
[QUOTE=RenegadeCop;50639475]Does it matter? What is the worst that could happen?
Most posts are saying don't because it could be bad, but what bad thing would happen?
If either one decides it isn't going to workout, they can tell the other "you know, I don't think this was a good idea/this isn't going to work out/I can do this, sorry" and life goes on[/QUOTE]
Whats the best thing that could happen? Some stagnant friendship based off good times they had a year ago? Whats the point? The doods pretty much said he's been stuck on her for the past 9 months, and they broke up 9 months ago and haven't said a word since, so it obviously wasn't on good terms that they broke up. What sort of good could come from dredging up all that bullshit back to the surface?
If anything he needs to move on and quit reminiscing on his ex since it's clearly doing him no good.
[editline]3rd July 2016[/editline]
Having the "Whats the worst that could happen?" mentality in life is just going to get you continuously fucked over.
Alright, update.
So we broke up, and right now it feels so surreal I might as well have been some thing in a Salvador Dali painting. But we talked it through and both agreed that this was the best course of action. We remained friends, kinda. It is obviously going to be difficult and awkward if I bump into her and stuff. I think I know that everything is going to be alright but right now it is just such a weird place for me.
Thanks to all who gave such good advice, having people to talk to feels incredibly good, even if it is people I have never met and will likely never meet. You people are super great, thanks!
Thanks for the advice, everyone. I made that post when I was half-asleep and super emotional, so I'm going to think on it for a few days before I decide on anything.
[QUOTE=RenegadeCop;50639539]There really wasn't that much bullshit, it wasn't a bad relationship from what I remember, they just didn't have time for each other and weren't happy.
If there's an opportunity for him to make a good friend, I think he should take it.
And "what's the worst that could happen" is your one way ticket to funsville[/QUOTE]
Again, whats the point of kindling a friendship with an ex you haven't talked to in 9 months. That would be like kindling a friendship with an ex you haven't talked to in 9 months.
I guess your mind a "ticket to funsville" is chock full of mono and hep.
[I]~Ex's ain't shit but hoes and tricks~[/I]
what do you guys think about really close friendships turning into relationships over time? like, does it happen normally? or does it vary situationally.
[QUOTE=NixNax123;50640685]what do you guys think about really close friendships turning into relationships over time? like, does it happen normally? or does it vary situationally.[/QUOTE]
Varies heavily situationally. You can be friends with someone from the opposite sex but never have chemistry. It depends heavily on how badly each friend wants to fuck the other too. Thats also really important for turning a friendship into a relationship.
[QUOTE=RenegadeCop;50644306]What's the point of kindling any friendship? What are the point of friends? You have a very negative attitude for ex's, when you cannot apply a blanket statement to them all.
Psychojake will know if it's worth it or not, he's the only one that really knows this person.[/QUOTE]
Yea he's the only one who can know if it's worth it or not but he asked for advice and I gave him my advice, which is to avoid an ex like they're the plague unless you want your xbox back or something. I've got nothing against friendships but it would be retarded to try and be friends with an ex that you haven't talked to in nearly a year.
I have a negative attitude towards ex's because ex's are almost always negative. People like you always seem to forget that the relationship ended for a reason. Just because you're nostalgic a year down the line about all the fun times you had doesn't mean that the bad times don't exist. The relationship is done, it's ended, leave it be and let it stay in the past so you can move on.
I need a little advice. There's a girl that I get along with really well, I've known her for several years, since before we graduated high school. We've always been on the same wavelength but nothing more than friends. She's admitted before that she was interested in me in the past, and I think I'm interested in her too. We've hung out before, but there's a bit of a problem. This would be a sure thing, I'd ask her out, we'd go see a movie yadda yadda, go from there. Except this girl smokes a lot of weed. Now, I have no problem with weed, I think it's fine, it should be legal, it's not bad for you, [i]but I hate the smell and I hate it when people around me are high.[/i]
Ever since I was first exposed to it many many years ago I've highly disliked being around intoxicated people and the stench of weed or booze or whatever. This isn't so much a weed thing as it is I'm not into any kind of intoxicant. I'm also highly sensitive to smoke. Now, I realize asking someone to change when I myself refuse to change is highly selfish, but I really think if not for that she and I would be perfect. We share everything in common, have the same goals, the same interests, all that stuff. Not to mention, she lives in a rather low-income situation working alone without help to support herself. What happens if she gets arrested? We live in Texas and the cops are obviously not that sympathetic here. Can I really ask her to make a change in her life like that? Or should I just wave goodbye and hope to meet another girl that I get along with as well who doesn't do anything like that?
[QUOTE=New Cidem;50645462]Can I really ask her to make a change in her life like that? Or should I just wave goodbye and hope to meet another girl that I get along with as well who doesn't do anything like that?[/QUOTE]
So if I understand it right, you do not want a relationship with her if she keeps smoking weed?
Asking for concessions in a relationship is hard but still manageable, asking for concessions in friendship is ehh... not a great thing to do. Since you are just 'friends' you can always bring it up and tell her you don't like being around her while she smokes / is high. She might tell you she'll try to smoke less while you are around. If you manage to get the ball rolling you might even be able to convince her to quit. But if she says that she doesn't want to, you are out of luck. Don't even try bringing it up again since it'll probably annoy you both. At that point you'll have to ask yourself if you wanna stay friends / have a relationship with a stoner.
[QUOTE=New Cidem;50645462]I need a little advice. There's a girl that I get along with really well, I've known her for several years, since before we graduated high school. We've always been on the same wavelength but nothing more than friends. She's admitted before that she was interested in me in the past, and I think I'm interested in her too. We've hung out before, but there's a bit of a problem. This would be a sure thing, I'd ask her out, we'd go see a movie yadda yadda, go from there. Except this girl smokes a lot of weed. Now, I have no problem with weed, I think it's fine, it should be legal, it's not bad for you, [i]but I hate the smell and I hate it when people around me are high.[/i]
Ever since I was first exposed to it many many years ago I've highly disliked being around intoxicated people and the stench of weed or booze or whatever. This isn't so much a weed thing as it is I'm not into any kind of intoxicant. I'm also highly sensitive to smoke. Now, I realize asking someone to change when I myself refuse to change is highly selfish, but I really think if not for that she and I would be perfect. We share everything in common, have the same goals, the same interests, all that stuff. Not to mention, she lives in a rather low-income situation working alone without help to support herself. What happens if she gets arrested? We live in Texas and the cops are obviously not that sympathetic here. Can I really ask her to make a change in her life like that? Or should I just wave goodbye and hope to meet another girl that I get along with as well who doesn't do anything like that?[/QUOTE]
If she was currently interested in you then yea, you could ask her to make that sacrifice to be in a relationship with you. But considering she [i]had[/i] feelings for you in the past but currently don't, as far as you know, it would be very unreasonable and selfish of you to start dating her then ask her to quit smoking.
You know fully that she's a pothead and you'd know what you're getting into if you started dating her. It'd be pretty fucked up for you 2 to get serious then you tell her to change her lifestyle if she wants to stick with you.
Those are both good points. I think she might be open to change, as she always asks if it's okay and requests permission when we hang out since she knows I don't smoke. I should mention that we're not dating, but we do flirt. I'd definitely ask her to dinner or something if it weren't for this complicated situation. It's the only thing holding me back right now. I can make concessions for her if that makes up for it.
[QUOTE=New Cidem;50646639]Those are both good points. I think she might be open to change, as she always asks if it's okay and requests permission when we hang out since she knows I don't smoke. I should mention that we're not dating, but we do flirt. I'd definitely ask her to dinner or something if it weren't for this complicated situation. It's the only thing holding me back right now. I can make concessions for her if that makes up for it.[/QUOTE]
If thats the case just be blunt. Tell her you're interested in her in a romantic capacity but the only thing thats stopping you is her being a pothead.
[QUOTE=Cyke Lon bee;50646864]If thats the case just be blunt. Tell her you're interested in her in a romantic capacity but the only thing thats stopping you is her being a pothead.[/QUOTE]
Please don't tell me you made that pun intentionally. Also yeah good plan.
[QUOTE=New Cidem;50645462]I need a little advice. There's a girl that I get along with really well, I've known her for several years, since before we graduated high school. We've always been on the same wavelength but nothing more than friends. She's admitted before that she was interested in me in the past, and I think I'm interested in her too. We've hung out before, but there's a bit of a problem. This would be a sure thing, I'd ask her out, we'd go see a movie yadda yadda, go from there. Except this girl smokes a lot of weed. Now, I have no problem with weed, I think it's fine, it should be legal, it's not bad for you, [I]but I hate the smell and I hate it when people around me are high.[/I]
Ever since I was first exposed to it many many years ago I've highly disliked being around intoxicated people and the stench of weed or booze or whatever. This isn't so much a weed thing as it is I'm not into any kind of intoxicant. I'm also highly sensitive to smoke. Now, I realize asking someone to change when I myself refuse to change is highly selfish, but I really think if not for that she and I would be perfect. We share everything in common, have the same goals, the same interests, all that stuff. Not to mention, she lives in a rather low-income situation working alone without help to support herself. What happens if she gets arrested? We live in Texas and the cops are obviously not that sympathetic here. Can I really ask her to make a change in her life like that? Or should I just wave goodbye and hope to meet another girl that I get along with as well who doesn't do anything like that?[/QUOTE]
I don't think you should enter serious relationships with addicts if you cannot put up with addicts. If she will quit for the relationship you'll also know she's serious and wants it too.
If she won't then you are probably not worth it from their perspective.
[QUOTE=New Cidem;50645462]I need a little advice. There's a girl that I get along with really well, I've known her for several years, since before we graduated high school. We've always been on the same wavelength but nothing more than friends. She's admitted before that she was interested in me in the past, and I think I'm interested in her too. We've hung out before, but there's a bit of a problem. This would be a sure thing, I'd ask her out, we'd go see a movie yadda yadda, go from there. Except this girl smokes a lot of weed. Now, I have no problem with weed, I think it's fine, it should be legal, it's not bad for you, [i]but I hate the smell and I hate it when people around me are high.[/i]
Ever since I was first exposed to it many many years ago I've highly disliked being around intoxicated people and the stench of weed or booze or whatever. This isn't so much a weed thing as it is I'm not into any kind of intoxicant. I'm also highly sensitive to smoke. Now, I realize asking someone to change when I myself refuse to change is highly selfish, but I really think if not for that she and I would be perfect. We share everything in common, have the same goals, the same interests, all that stuff. Not to mention, she lives in a rather low-income situation working alone without help to support herself. What happens if she gets arrested? We live in Texas and the cops are obviously not that sympathetic here. Can I really ask her to make a change in her life like that? Or should I just wave goodbye and hope to meet another girl that I get along with as well who doesn't do anything like that?[/QUOTE]
It stinks like a [bad smelling thing], amirite? I don't hate people being high around me but I can't stand the smell either. Glad I stopped tbh.
[editline]5th July 2016[/editline]
[QUOTE=Navarchus;50649614]I don't think you should enter serious relationships with addicts if you cannot put up with addicts. If she will quit for the relationship you'll also know she's serious and wants it too.
If she won't then you are probably not worth it from their perspective.[/QUOTE]
You can be addicted to a non addictive drug?
[QUOTE=Sylvie;50649775]It stinks like a [bad smelling thing], amirite? I don't hate people being high around me but I can't stand the smell either. Glad I stopped tbh.
[editline]5th July 2016[/editline]
You can be addicted to a non addictive drug?[/QUOTE]
Psychological addiction is a thing even with non-biologically addictive drugs.
[QUOTE=Sylvie;50649802]and it's not a common phenomenon either.[/QUOTE]
Everything pleasant or fun can become cripplingly addictive. Why would weed be magically exempt from this.
[QUOTE=Sylvie;50649802]and it's not a common phenomenon either.[/QUOTE]
What makes you think that? Take gambling for example, people get addicted to it very very frequently, and it isn't even a drug.
But yeah, we don't know more of her than "she smokes a lot", wich is not really enough to state that she has an addiction.
[QUOTE=Sylvie;50649821]My point is that it's uncommon and smoking it a lot doesn't necessarily correlate with dependency. But sure, let's just call this one girl we don't know an addict. :^)[/QUOTE]
If she smokes once a week, he wouldn't complain that she smokes a lot.
Excessive use does often refer to addiction.
ok jesus fucking christ what a goddamn story
so some of you may remember that girl from a WHILE ago, with the April Fool's text.
well, after not talking for 3 months, something happened!
a few days ago, i hung out with friends and she was there (most of our friends are mutual) and we had a good time. close friend told me that her and her abusive boyfriend (of around 3 years) had recently broken up. i played it cool.
two days ago, we go skating and hang out pretty much the entire day. she actually started crying about her ex while we were watching a movie, and i helped her through that. but other than that it was a really good day. she told me upfront that i'm the only person she really opens up to and talks with. i still played it cool, but i knew emotions might have been there.
then, yesterday, she asked me to come over to her house during the evening. we go into her room and she asked if i wanted to watch a movie. then we put one on (The Wall)... and suddenly cuddle up on her bed. like, holding hands, spooning, all that stuff. we didn't kiss (i could tell she wasn't ready for that so i didn't try after she turned her head from an obvious opportunity). but the point is, there was an obvious connection between us.
then we go for a walk in the morning and we talk about it a bit. she said that she liked me and didn't think i liked her, and it was the same for me. and she thought we had really amazing chemisty. she even said she liked hanging out with me more than she did with her boyfriend when they were dating.
we don't talk about it much until a few hours later, where she says she's not ready for a relationship right now because she feels really closed off and she thinks that she should get over her current feelings so as to not bring them into a new one (completely understandable, as i told her). but she told me that she does have feelings for me, and i told her that i am interesting in pursuing something with her, but only when she's ever ready. she was really receptive and she said she doesn't regret what we did, and that she still wants to hang out with me and stuff. i basically told her that i completely respect her feelings and i don't want to pressure her into doing anything she doesn't want to.
but i'm just really happy all that's out there now. hopefully things turn out well (i'm not expecting anything), but if they do, wish me luck (:
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