So I'm on the pantry area in the kitchen. No one is allowed in there except employees. While I'm working someone taps my shoulder, I turn around and it's this old lady.
She says
"Hello"
I say "Hi back"
She then asks, "Where's the restroom?"
...
I told her but goddamn that was weird, I don't know how long she was standing there. But what tells you to go in a employee only section and ask where the bathroom is?
She also put on this weird smile too.
I have worked for Circuit City and Best Buy. Never will I work retail again. These stories are of bad customers, and bad managers. People always assume it's the customers that are the issue, but management can make your life even worse.
Circuit City:
[b]Respect your elders[/b]
My very first week of working there, I had my first encounter with a bad customer. I worked in the media department (Video games, movies, music, small electronics, ect) and an elderly man walked into my department. I confidently approached him and simply asked "Anything I can assist you with sir?". He immediately replied "I'm not buying any Goddamn warranty". Having a pretty high tolerance, I brushed it off and replied "No sir, can I help you find something?". He was looking for a phone, and he had NO clue what he wanted. He was looking to replace an old 80's wireless phone. I began to ask questions about his setup, and almost EVERY time I asked him a question he'd interrupt asking me what he should get. I nicely told him "I need to get a better idea of what you have so you can get the right phone sir". He then flipped out "You little Goddamn prick, I'm not buying any $150.00 phone so you can make commission". That was my turning point...."Firstly sir, I don't work on commission, secondly there are phones clearly labeled at $30.00, and finally I don't appreciate your hostility". After ranting on and on how I am no help, he asks for my manager. I slunk off to my manager (mind you I wanted to seem independent) and tell him the situation. My manager goes to the customer and tells me to just go back to the department.
[b]Hello operator?[/b]
I had 3 phones in my department for answering calls. They all had separate lines for some stupid reason. I would always enjoy getting calls because I liked the good feeling people get when you say "Yes, we have that", but my God people are so stupid. Firstly, my most common call that just made me facepalm was "Hello thank you for calling [b]Circuit City[/b]! Can I help you?" only to have the reply "Is this the electronics department?". You've no idea how many times in the 8 months I worked there I had to say "The entire store is electronics Sir/Mam".
Getting calls to hold things was an entire headache. We had a pretty strict policy we cant hold large items or items that have limited stock. When GTA IV launched, we sold out of copies really fast. The first day we had it we almost ran completely out. When about 9:00PM came around, I had a caller who asked "Can you hold a copy of GTA 4 for a few hours?" In the nicest way I replied "I'm sorry sir, but we can't hold GTA 4 because many people are coming in to buy it and we would loose a sale if you didn't come." he immediately started to scream "Oh Jesus Christ is that bullshit! I've been looking all day long for a fucking copy, and you peons cant hold one copy!? I'll be there by 10 after I get out of work!". I replied "I understand that, but you're not the only one who has asked sir, there are other people who are going to try to get here after work as well" he jumps in "Well fuck that you cocksucker, I'm never buying from your fucking store". He hung up, and by 10 we sold every last copy.
I also had an angry mother who asked if I would hold a copy of the Rock Band 2 set. We had just gotten 6 or 7 units after much demand. I had people on a waiting list for weeks. She called up and asked for me to hold one. I reply "We can't hold any of these because they are in high demand and we only have 4 left". She raises a shitstorm that goes all the way to a manager (Just got the position 2 weeks after I started working there) who comes back to me and with the tone of a dickhead says "Why can't you hold this for a customer?" I reply with a smug grin "See how we only have 4 left? People are on their way as we speak for copies. We are not allowed to hold them". He looks at me as if his brain fried and goes back to his office. By the end of the night, that mother did make it in time for the last set.
[b]Rated B for bitch[/b]
If you don't know, for a video game salesman we are absolutely without a doubt [b]NOT[/b] allow to sell M rated games to minors. We have it posted EVERYWHERE and it is enforced beyond belief. I'd say I had at least 4 kids a day trying to buy M rated games. I always asked that they need their parents permission, and they would either A. Not come back or B. Get their parent. Whenever I had a parent come into the store I would thoroughly explain why the game was rated M, and what to expect. In this particular instance, a kid wanted to buy Gears of War 2. I explained EXACTLY what to expect. "Chainsaw killing, much gore and blood, swearing, and intense violence. I can't sell this game to him, but I can't stop you from buying it for him." She shrugs it off and off they go. The very next day she comes storming to my section with the kid dragging him and the game in his hand. She slams it down [i]screaming[/i] at me: "What the hell is wrong with you!? I watched him play this game and he was sawing people in half! Why in God's name would anyone buy this!" I explained how I told her just last night what was in the game, the rating system, and that this game isn't appropriate for her son. She just flew it back in my face that anyone who would play this is mentally ill. I explained that it was for adults, and we sell movies right on these racks that contain quite worse but you wouldn't buy your son an R rated movie. She of course like all assheads goes to the manager, and explains what happens. He issues a refund and she leaves.
[b]Ego's and you![/b]
No store is without it's managers. I had 4. One was an awesome guy who had a big heart, but he was always busy, a bitch who acted like she was the mother of the store but none liked her, the smartass douche who was actually having a thing with one of the employees, and the asshole who treated everyone who didn't carry Tim Horton's coffee at all times like shit.
First issue I ever had with one of these people was when a person in my department was very tired I let them take my break instead. She was very tired from working her second job the night before, and just needed to sit down. We had two 10 minute breaks a day and I thought that instead of me taking one, I'd just let her take it as I filled in. She was very greatful and headed to the back. I felt very good, it was a quite day, and I was just cleaning the racks when suddenly I hear the clip-clop of high heals heading right for me. "Page (my last name) what the hell do you think you're doing? You can't just let someone take a break!". I looked at her sincerely and replied "I figured that since I had two breaks left, I'd give her one to rest, she's tired an-" "I could care less what you figure. You're not a manager and you certainly have no authority to just let someone have a break." I reply "I was just trying to be nice, how is it hurting anyone?" she says "It's hurting your chances of staying here, do it again and you won't be here anymore." she storms off and not only did I loose one of my breaks, but the girl I let take mine was forced back on the floor. We spent the next 5 hours talking shit about the manager.
This next one just makes you think of what kind of people run our country. It was a beautiful Saturday. I was scheduled off and had plans with friends. As I was packing my car, my phone rings. Picking it up with a friendly "Hello?" my ear is penetrated with "PAGE! Where the hell are you!". I reply "At home?". It was one of the managers. He tells me "So when the hell did you expect to get to work? You're 40 minutes late!". "Late?" I reply. "I have off today..." He replies "The scheduled says you were supposed to be here 40 minutes ago!" I look at my schedule that HE printed for me a week ago and as clear as day it said I have off. "My schedule says I have off sir, is there a mistake?" he says "No, [u]MY[/u] schedule says you're supposed to be here at 2:00PM and it's 2:45PM!". I was so let down and upset, but I needed the job "I'll be there as soon as possible" he hung up and I spent the next 15 minutes calling all sorts of people to cancel our day. I get to work and he calls me in the office. I showed him my schedule and he sees the day off. He sighs and tells me to get on the floor. So as usual I stack games, clean, ect when suddenly El Senior douchebag with his trenchcoat and Tim Horton's says "So page, why are you late?" I can't help but think he's only here because he needs to feed on other people for nourishment. I just said "Scott mixed up the schedule, must have updated it after giving me mine." The asshole just says "Well, you need to be more responsible." My eyes widened, I turned around, my piss was boiling from the sheer douchebaggery, I reply "Do I make the schedule? No. You do. It's your responsibilities to inform employees of changes, not me." "So you thin you're smart?" I reply "Yes in fact, I think I'm very smart. You guys had me off today, and decide to just change it without informing me? That's your mistake, not mine. I read my schedule and come in." He just chuckled and walked off.
Finally, the day came when we announced bankruptcy. I had never been so happy. Not only could I not be fired for being defensive, but I didn't have to shove warranties down people's throats.
The managers still had to be dickheads even when the end was near. One situation I can't believe transpired,was when a customer asked me for a CD. She wanted some sort of CD that escapes me what it was, and I began searching for it. She asks me "Don't you listen to music?" I replied in a playful way "Oh not this kind haha". I spent about 10 minutes going through CDs before in the corner of my eye I see the customer talking to one of my managers. He storms over to me, and grabs me by the arm like he's my fucking father or something and under his breath utters "Page, it's not your job to tell customers what music you listen to" I replied "She asked-" "No, stop making excuses and find the CD" I forced my arm out and said "Firstly, keep your Goddamn hands off me, secondly SHE asked if I listened to this music, go back to sipping your fucking coffee you Goddamn tool." he storms off KNOWING he couldn't do anything. Felt good man.
We closed, and I watched the building become a thrift store. I moved to California afterwards, only to work for
Best Buy:
I was L.P (Loss prevention AKA: The guys in the yellow at the front). I thought it would be simple stuff, and believe me it should have been, but the dickheads who run these stores have no idea what they are doing. When I was trained, my manager told me to watch the cameras at all times while looking up now and then. Alright, sounds simple. Then, my supervisor says to watch the store and look at the cameras now and then. Okay? So I did what I thought was a good mix. I watched people coming in and out, saying Hello, goodbye, ect and watching the cameras when it was quite. Jesus Christ I can't tell you how many times I was talked to. They told me to watch, then not watch, watch, not watch, over and over and over. I even met Bill Goldberg (the wrestler) [url]http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bill_Goldberg[/url] when his computer broke I talked to him about possible problems and how he could fix it on his own, but to still have Geek Squad take a look. With a smile and goodbye HO-BOY I was chewed out "It's not your job to help customers". I blankly stared and stated "So I'm supposed to tell him to fuck off?" I was fired on the spot. Unemployment for a while wasn't so bad, but I wanted to get high on the chain.
NEVER will I work in retail again. Anyone have any work at home sites? ;)
You're working wage jobs because you have no game and no hustle. Therefore, someone gets to decide how much your time is worth.
[QUOTE=CodeMonkey3;32279889]I work at Target restocking shelves and unloading trucks. I speculate that everything is scanned into the store and we have a real time inventory list. (We have 5 Pillows. Someone buys 3. We restock 3 the following truck.)
Well, I think we need to review exactly how it works. Because if someone buys 1 lamp and we have the entire shelf PACKED I shouldn't get six new lamps to restock the one we just sold.
Additionally I've been restocking mandarin oranges for days.
I hate door mirrors. There is an 80% they're all broken when you get them. 20% chance there are any left to put on the shelf. They really need to review their packing methods or what they're made of or SOMETHING because I'm getting tired of sending three boxes of door mirrors to the back room because they're all broken.[/QUOTE]
Jesus christ this. Our inventory system is FUCKING RETARDED.
I like to think there's some guy, just one guy, in shipping/receiving at our Warehouse that's got brain damage and he thinks like this:
"They sold one of these, so let's send them three more because they're obviously picking up in business."
or
"They haven't sold any of these in a while. Either they don't have any or they need to be reminded of them. SEND THEM TWENTY."
We have literally 32 square feet of wall space taken up for JUST batteries. Not assorted batteries. Not including rechargeables, lithium batteries, and phone batteries. Just C's, D's, AAA's, AA's, and 9v's.
AND WE HAVE FIVE BOXES IN THE BACK STUFFED FULL OF BATTERIES
AND WE JUST GOT THREE MORE BOXES IN
[editline]14th September 2011[/editline]
[QUOTE=Keegs;32280063]I work at a D&W (Local grocery chain) as a service clerk (ex: clearing bottle machines, help old people with groceries).
This one day It's really busy, i'm the only one working. I'm helping some senile old lady out to her car when this lady comes up to me while I'm walking out and asks for help with the bottle machine, I tell her I'll be right there once I take out these groceries, she grunts and walks back to the machine.
I come back in and pop open the machine and see that she inserted one of those Huge energy drink cans (Which our signs clearly say you have to take to the front since the machines are old and not built for them), I take it out, reset the machine and tell her the cans are too big, smile and tell her she can take them to the service counter though. She mutters 'bullshit' under her breath and I walk out.
Less than a minute later I hear the machine beeping again, I walk back in and she's inserted the same sized can again. I open the machine, tell her again it's too big, you can tell she's frustrated. Walk out and go to the backroom to throw out some cardboard boxes, quickly hear "*Name Here* to bottle returns, *Name here* to bottle returns.". Walk back into room only to see the same women staring me in the eyes, very pissed off. Same fucking can, while I'm pulling it out of the machine I hear her talking in a normal voice "This is just bullshit, do you know how long it took him to get up here I've been waiting for almost 10 minutes!" I hand her the can, smile on my face and calmly say "Would you like any help returning you cans?".
Also, bottle/can Return machine for States/Countries that don't have them.
[IMG]http://dl.dropbox.com/u/2149114/imagehosting/sept/01.jpg[/IMG][/QUOTE]
What a stupid bitch.
[QUOTE=FinalHunter;32277358]I thought this was the funny part. :v:
Post of the year 2011.[/QUOTE]
Only part-time in high school and college.
[editline]14th September 2011[/editline]
[QUOTE=JohnStamosFan;32279405]It's not retail, but food service, but i have a "i hate this job" moment. (Actually i had a ton...but this is one).
Anyhow, i was working at Charley's Steakery in my local mall. I'm working on the flat-top grill cooking sandwiches when i see this guy angrily pumping his ketchup. I look up at him, making my first mistake. He notices and turns to me and yells "THIS IS BULLSHIT!" I then made my second mistake by not pretending to have missed what he said. So, i ask "What sir?" and he looks at me again and just shouts "THIS IS FUCKING BULLSHIT!". At this point i'm wondering if he got the wrong sandwich or something so i set the spatulas down and walk over to figure out what this fuck-tard is going on about.
He angrily stares me down as i walk to the end of the counter to ask what's the matter and he holds up his ketchup cup and just says "These ketchup cups are fucking bullshit".
Startled i ask him "What is bullshit about them?". He angrily grumbled about how they are "Too damn small". At this point i'm just sick of the guy and want him to fuck off, so i tell him that he can take as many as he wants. He then angrily says again "THEY'RE BULLSHIT!" so i say, "Well i'm not the guy who orders the bullshit cups, and i'm pretty sure that's regular size" and walk off to leave him with his ketchup. He angrily stormed off and i was fortunate enough to not have to deal with that asshole again.
I hate fast food...[/QUOTE]
That' why you do this...
[img]http://farm5.static.flickr.com/4088/5120087765_a20232bc61_b.jpg[/img]
[QUOTE=Ven Kaeo;32281695]Jesus christ this. Our inventory system is FUCKING RETARDED.
I like to think there's some guy, just one guy, in shipping/receiving at our Warehouse that's got brain damage and he thinks like this:
"They sold one of these, so let's send them three more because they're obviously picking up in business."
or
"They haven't sold any of these in a while. Either they don't have any or they need to be reminded of them. SEND THEM TWENTY."
We have literally 32 square feet of wall space taken up for JUST batteries. Not assorted batteries. Not including rechargeables, lithium batteries, and phone batteries. Just C's, D's, AAA's, AA's, and 9v's.
AND WE HAVE FIVE BOXES IN THE BACK STUFFED FULL OF BATTERIES
AND WE JUST GOT THREE MORE BOXES IN
[editline]14th September 2011[/editline]
What a stupid bitch.[/QUOTE]
What size boxes?
[QUOTE=Otsegolation;32281398]You're working wage jobs because you have no game and no hustle. Therefore, someone gets to decide how much your time is worth.[/QUOTE]
I'm working a wage job because
1- there isn't shit out there for anything else
and
2- I'm a good goddamn salesman.
Don't be a douche, Oste.
[editline]14th September 2011[/editline]
[QUOTE=LordCrypto;32281770]What size boxes?[/QUOTE]
They're special boxes that hold like 4-8 boxes of batteries packed by the manufacturer to hold around 10-15 packs of batteries (so, very efficiently packed to cram the most shit into the smallest space)
The boxes we have in the back right now have around... fuck. At least 300 packs of fucking batteries.
We barely even sell the god damn things. We can't compete with Costco and their bullshit 48 pack for $5.
[QUOTE=Blanketspace;32279768]Hilariously enough, my god-father was one of the producers.[/QUOTE]
Shake your godfather's hand for me, it was such a great film.
[QUOTE=Otsegolation;32281398]You're working wage jobs because you have no game and no hustle. Therefore, someone gets to decide how much your time is worth.[/QUOTE]
As someone who is working 25-35 hours per week in retail in order to help pay for my college expenses, I would like to speak for not only myself but also for the millions of current and former retail workers who depend on the job to make ends meet: Get the fuck off your high horse. I'm glad to even have a job in this economy and you think that's something to look down upon?
At any rate, I've had a few bizzare events in my time working at Gamestop, though overall we have very pleasant customers.
One good story took place this past winter. I was closing with the assistant manager for the night, and we started smelling a gas of some sort. We couldn't determine what it was but after the smell grew in intensity and we noticed a slight haze in the store, we got the fuck out and called the fire department to check it out. They did exactly that and, while attempting to find the source, took an AXE to the wall and drawers. Turns out it was simply a burned out power supply from one of our interactive units, but to see the huge chunk of missing wall was a very strange sight indeed. My manager and our district manager was not amused :v:
Other than that, most of my encounters have been run-of-the-mill dealings with customer stupidity and management. Most of our customers are remarkably knowledgeable (or are at least very impressed with the staff's knowledge), but man...I can't tell you how many parents we get who genuinely had no idea that video games have a rating system like movies do. There are also a disturbing number of parents who are quite clearly opposed to buying M rated games for their 8 year olds, but they buy them anyway.
Management is also guilty of a few foul-ups here and there, most notably related to the blizzard this past winter and Hurricane Irene. Not only were we not allowed to close early as the blizzard was slamming us, but we were expected to open the store the next day at normal hours, even with 26 inches of snow on the ground. With Irene, we had to fight to close the store early so employees could make it home safely before the storm hit, and we REALLY had to fight to get the next day off which was when the storm was forecast to be hitting the hardest. I don't understand management at all.
This happens so often, I work in a Woolworths bottle shop.
Customer: Do you price match the wine? Since I saw this downstairs for $10 and in here it's $14.
Me: No sorry, we don't price match, you could get another one or-
Customer: People like you are the reason everything is so expensive! It sickens me you can charge so much more than the other stores.
Me: Sorry, I have no control over the prices, I am just working here.
Customer: Yeah, I'm sure, well you should change it or price match for me.
Me: Why don't you just go downstairs and buy it?
-Customer storms off-
The other bottle shop is literally 20 metres away.
Also:
Me: Can I see I.D?
Customer: Yeah, I'm 20 I just left my I.D in the car.
Me: Well, you will have to go get it mate, I can get in trouble if they see I didn't check you.
Customer: WHAT THE FUCK I AM 20 AND I COME IN HERE AND YOU WANT TO CHECK MY I.D! DO I LOOK 16 TO YOU?
Me: Sorry, but I could say that I'm the king of England, but that doesn't mean it's true, so either go somewhere else or go get your I.D.
Or.. Just people generally threatening you because they are really drunk and you can't serve them..
The only thing I really hate about my job (shelf stacker) is one of my supervisors.
He's the type of guy who slags you off for taking too long while constantly helping out the other guys or sends you on other errands.
Besides that, I like my job. Pay's nice, colleagues are cool and the job itself isn't too bad.
I remember one of these threads before
Did I ever post the story of the cracked-out teenager?
I work at a full-service gas station, normally alone on my shifts. I've had quite a few fuck-fests.
There was this one time that I was pumping gas for a guy, but I didn't quite hear how much he wanted. He wanted 50, but it's hard to differentiate between 50 and 15, so I asked him as politely as fucking possible, "pardon me sir?"
Before I continue, I'd just like to say that this guy had the biggest fucking nose you'll ever see. I'm not even kidding when I say that it was probably a good 5 times the size of my nose, and my nose is pretty big...
Anyways, After I asked him, he turned around and stared at me with the dumbest fucking look. He then continued on his way, to which I said "sir, how much gas would you like?" He turns to me, and yells "FIFTYYYYYYYYYYY" in a really nasally voice. Try saying "fifty" in a really deep, super-nasally voice. That's what he sounded like.
Since I was busy both in the store and outside at the pumps, I was in a generally stressed mood, and I was prone to frustration. I was pissed, and without even thinking, I turned to him and said "SORRYYYYY" in the same nasal-shit voice he had. He did that I'm-so-offended scoff and ran (literally) into the store. It was the most awkward silence when he paid for his gas.
There was also this one time when a guy wanted his receipt for gas, but since there's 3, (the one from the cash, a legitimate gas receipt with mileage on it and a debit receipt, which is what he paid with) so I asked him "what receipt would you like, sir?" to which he replied "YA YOU NOW THE PIECE OF PAPER THAT THE MACHINE PRINTS?" I shrugged and handed him his debit receipt and he left.
Not even 5 minutes later, he comes back asking where the mileage is on the receipt. Not even saying a word, I printed him a gas receipt, handed it to him, and he stared at it for 5 minutes and eventually left. I felt bad for him, really, I'd hate to be that stupid.
[QUOTE=Esrange;32282924]I remember one of these threads before
Did I ever post the story of the cracked-out teenager?[/QUOTE]
Who gives a shit, post it again!
I could never work in retail. I have a temper from hell and if someone gets in my face over something stupid I'll tell them to fuck off. My main concern after reading these stories and parents and M-rated games. Dumb mothers :v:
*shivers* retail
i've done things i'm not proud of at all, just to fund my education.
some of the people who work higher-up are fucking sadistic.
if any of you have doubts about how important education is, go fucking work in retail for a store with a lot of customers. you'll do your homework and be early for class everyday just so you won't have to go back.
I once worked as an IT help in a hospital, so you'd get your share of weird things but the weirdest thing happened is when I got a call to go help the surgeons' computers in the surgery departement.
So I call out my older supervisor, and we both head there, first having to go through a 30min sterlization checkup, then putting on those awkward plastic clothes and shoes/hats, THEN answer some basic questions before we were allowed in.
We walk up to this imposing surgeon-guy, cladded in full getup, and he calmly says "Our computer for keeping track of the patients froze, could you fix it?"
At this point I'm thinking "Wait a minute, did he say it just froze?"
So with all my skill in fixing higher tech things, I push the button that turns it off, and then push it again to turn it back on again.
"Oh, that seemed to have fixed it, you're good at these things you know!"
So here we have a multi-doctorate, top-of-the-class latin-speaking surgeon, who can't tell where the on/off button is on a normal PC.
After we had gone through the whole thing of getting the clothes off again and we got back in our cosy IT-room, I burst out laughing in front of my supervisor.
He didn't give me any remarks, he just said "After working here for years, you get used to that kind of stuff".
[QUOTE=Chernobyl426;32283061]I could never work in retail. I have a temper from hell and if someone gets in my face over something stupid I'll tell them to fuck off. My main concern after reading these stories and parents and M-rated games. Dumb mothers :v:[/QUOTE]
I thought so too. I'm a really angry person. But working retail tempered my rage real fucking quick.
If you want to keep your job you learn to wait until the customer leaves THEN you mock them.
My boss is really fucking cool about that. I can't count how many times he'll flip shit once a customer leaves and mock them or call them stupid cunts or something like that. It's goddamn hilarious.
I worked at the dreaded People's Socialist Republic of Wal-Martistan, and it fucking sucked. I finally got fired for several things, one of which was reaming a customer a new asshole and I was entirely right for doing so. Never working retail again, I'm too much of an angry person for it.
One particular day it was pretty much typical weather in Minnesota. Sunny one minute, downpour the next with a slight chance of biblical plague. I arrived at 9:45 AM, punched in at 10:00 AM and started my shift by "zoning" which really means making shit look pretty. I had heard the storm rolling in and being Minnesotan I knew in my sleep it was going to storm, but the out of state assholes apparently aren't gifted like we are. People came in, soggy and wet bitching the whole way while the locals were like "wow a bit rainy, don'tcha know?" Anyway, it was getting towards the middle of the day (4 PM) when the power (finally) went out and we had to start ushering people out of the store. Of course Wal-Marts are supposed to be open 24/7 and people are getting antsy and angry, while this one confused old man is sort of hobbling towards the exit. Well because of the water, he slips and falls then struggles to stand back up. Of course I wander over to him to go help, but not before this total bitch STEPS OVER HIM and says aloud "oh hahaha what a fucking dumbass" or something. I knew she at least called him a dumbass but holy SHIT I was pissed. I hurry closer and help the old guy up, he thanks me and finally I get to leave about fifteen minutes later. Still fuming about that whole mess, I got into my car and started the drive home. Of course the roads were awful but really nobody was in the ditch, but some people had pulled over. Used to driving in shit conditions, I just went onward until I saw this ridiculous foreign car in the ditch some ways and I stop to see if they're alright. GUESS WHO'S THE DRIVER! That's fucking right, the same broad who stepped over the old man and I step out to greet her. She opened up with a long list of complaints, how it sucked here, small towns are shit, that whole thing and I just smiled and let her go on and on. The following conversation and the best part of my day happened next:
"Well, sounds like you've got all sorts of issues. You call somebody to pick you up?"
"Yeah, they'll be here but than-*"
"GOOD! Good. I love living here, you know, these shitty small towns, the smelly animals, the weather, all of it is home to me. I also love how I can tell if somebody isn't from here, because they're not arrogant, sanctimonious cocksuckers like you! They also don't step over old men who fall down in Wal-Mart and remark about how they're a 'dumbass' and keep on walking. You know, I can't wait for the weekend to be over so you and your kind get the FUCK out of my woods."
I got in, slammed my door and sped off. I was angry, but it kind of felt good to tell her off but I did feel [i]slightly[/i] bad for leaving her there.
I done a short stint in the horrible world of retail, and have one moderately funny story from my first week.
I was at a UK frozen food store, around christmas time, just filling freezers with food. exciting stuff, a man comes up to me and asks where the turkey roasting joints are, so i walk him to the freezer, show him the turkey selection, and he puts 4 frozen turkey roasting joints in his basket, thanks me, then walks to the next aisle.
I begin walking back to the store room to get more shit to freeze, and the supervisor somes out just doing a round, says to me "watch out, theres a shoplifter in the store"
next thing i see is the guy i helped running out of the door with the supervisor chasing after him, shouted asnother worker to go with him incase anything happened, the shoploifter yelled "COME ON THEN" and ran at my supervisor who bolted back inside.
The theif ran into the pug across the road and police arrived within minutes.
2 riot vans and 3 cars were needed to deal with the man and his basket of turkey.
I left shortly after that and got a cool job making legal drugs for 4x the wages i was being paid
Oh well, I have an office job. In Germany. Combine the two most boring things in the world and you get my job. My coworkers are half dead mid-50 zombieswho stare into screens with expressionless faces and the few words they speak are barely about anything other than business.
We should really make a thread like this for office people. With stories about that one time when you spent the whole day staring at a screen, doing stuff you don't give two flying fucks about just to come home too exhausted to do much before you sleep and repeat.
Seriously, another 3 years and I'll pull a Falling Down. Goddamn, I wanted to do something creative.
A Genuine Cents Of Change
Coffee Shop | Vancouver, BC, Canada | Coffee Shop, Criminals
(At this coffee shop, do not accept $100 bills because all $20 are automatically dropped into a safe and we cannot make adequate change. It’s a particularly busy day with a rather long line, and a customer
approaches.)
Customer: “I want a medium americano.” *hands me $100 bill*
Me: “I’m sorry, but I don’t have enough change to accept that bill. Do you happen to have anything smaller?”
Customer: “No, this is all I have. I don’t have anything smaller.”
Me: “Well then, today is your lucky day. Your drink is on me today!”
(Note: I am trying to get the line moving and we’re allowed to give an arbitrary number of free drinks away a day if we think it’ll make the customer happy.)
Customer: “No, just take the money, please. I don’t want the free drink. Just get the change from the safe.”
Me: “I can’t do that, but your free drink will be up on the counter quickly.”
Customer: “I don’t want the free drink!” *storms out without drink*
(My manager, who had been eavesdropping on the entire exchange, approaches me after the customer leaves.)
Manager: “Well, that bill was obviously counterfeit. Good for you for not accepting it!”
Okay, from reading other posts, this is a really funny thread.
Me: Pizza Shop, how can I help you?
Her:(With the most annoying voice I had ever heard, I seriously thought I was being pranked at first) Yeaaaaah, I need to order a pizza.
Me: Okay will that be for Pick up or delivery
Her: Take out
Me: Okay Pick up-
Her: NO! I want it be delivered! Gosh!
Me: Okay sorry, my mistake what would you like on that pie and what size?
Her: Ummm, I want a Medium pie with uhhh
Me: I'm sorry but we only serve small and large, the small being 12 inches and the large being 16 inches.
Her: Oh...well how big is the small?
Me: It's 12 inches, pretty comparable to your typical dominoes medium pie.
Her:...Hold on lemme talk to my husband (This is a pain in the ass because whenever some asshole makes their dumb broad order she has to go back and ask him a million different questions when we don't have something they want specifically, and thus, keeping other people from making orders and slowing us down and for some reason only satan could know this only happens on really fucking busy days.)
Her: Okay well take a large. The 12 inch.
Me: Ma'am, (There's a vain bulging in my forehead at this point)The small pie is 12 inches and the large is 16.
Her: Oh well I mean the 16 inch.
Me: Okay what would you like on the pizza?
Her: Oh shoot hold on lemme ask (This takes ANOTHER five minutes of me hearing them faintly arguing)
Her: Okay I want...cheese...and sauce...but put the sauce under the cheese.
Me: *facepalm* Yes, of course we put that on all of our pizza's unless otherwise specified.
Her: Oh okay...that's kind of weird. Why would you put toppings on a pizza someone didn't ask for.
My brain at this point explodes and I feel the relief of warm thick blood exiting my ear canals and drenching the phone in a crimson orgasm as I spend another 5 minutes explaining to her why the standard pizza consists of sauce, dough, and cheese. The jelly of my eyes have begun to boil at this point and the plastic casing of the phone would have been crushed in my anger grip by this point if my hands had not been lubricated from the now drying cherry delight.
Her: Oh... okay well lemme just call back later then.
I sat the phone down calmly, gazing at it's tiny LCD display showing how long the call took. Almost twenty minutes. I took a deep breath and sighed as my need to stay alive decreased a little more in that little moment and knowing there were probably people worse than this...It broke my heart to think of. Later the same woman called and I ended up having to explain to her why more slices doesn't equal more pizza. I began therapy that next Tuesday and promptly shot myself in my bathroom August 23rd 2009 at 4:23 in the afternoon. It was a sunny day.
I used to work at a high street clothes store in the UK which many of you might know as Matalan as a general sales assistant. At the time of me starting the job, I had just completed 6 months voluntary service in the Royal Air Force and on my application form I had specified I had military experience. Like that mattered to them hiring me but I digress.. This tale involves these:
[img]http://www.rubberduckrace.co.uk/config/images/duck.jpg[/img]
Anyway, managers knew of my experience with the Air Force and when the store got especially busy, I would be pulled from the till (cash register) and tasked to assist the security patrol with watching the store. Together we had to cover about a 270m square store, with potentially 200+ customers and four departments. Today was a busy day and I was pulled off tills to assist security, and I got a call on the radio that there were some known shoplifters operating on the retail park today. Sure enough they came into the store, and I shadowed a group of them whilst keeping my colleagues informed via the radio. I followed them for what must have been 5-6 minutes around the menswear section when I got a call on the radio to come to the front desk ASAP.
Upon arriving there was a fellow being confronted by the security patrol and my managers, as he had been found trying to shoplift several items without paying for them. What was hilarious though, and what completely threw me, was what he had tried to steal.
We had a "home" department, with things for the kitchen, bathroom and the like. We had a shelf with small rubber ducks of different sizes - some wooly "mitten" style ones, and a big duck-shaped container (the kind of thing you'd buy a family with newborns). The thief had thrown a couple of dozen rubber ducks into a big duck container, and tried to get past by just paying for the container at the checkout. An eagle eyed sales assistant noticed it was rather heavy, and yelled for security to investigate.
He forever became known as the "Duck Thief".
I work at a Levi's outlet. Yesterday we had a crackhead shoplifter who simply took a stack of jeans and sprinted out of the store with them...
According to company policy there's nothing we could have done.
[QUOTE=Kurtzund;32287889]I work at a Levi's outlet. Yesterday we had a crackhead shoplifter who simply took a stack of jeans and sprinted out of the store with them...
According to company policy there's nothing we could have done.[/QUOTE]
They've got their own outlets? Interesting.
[QUOTE=JumpinJackFlash;32285931]I worked at the dreaded People's Socialist Republic of Wal-Martistan, and it fucking sucked. I finally got fired for several things, one of which was reaming a customer a new asshole and I was entirely right for doing so. Never working retail again, I'm too much of an angry person for it.
One particular day it was pretty much typical weather in Minnesota. Sunny one minute, downpour the next with a slight chance of biblical plague. I arrived at 9:45 AM, punched in at 10:00 AM and started my shift by "zoning" which really means making shit look pretty. I had heard the storm rolling in and being Minnesotan I knew in my sleep it was going to storm, but the out of state assholes apparently aren't gifted like we are. People came in, soggy and wet bitching the whole way while the locals were like "wow a bit rainy, don'tcha know?" Anyway, it was getting towards the middle of the day (4 PM) when the power (finally) went out and we had to start ushering people out of the store. Of course Wal-Marts are supposed to be open 24/7 and people are getting antsy and angry, while this one confused old man is sort of hobbling towards the exit. Well because of the water, he slips and falls then struggles to stand back up. Of course I wander over to him to go help, but not before this total bitch STEPS OVER HIM and says aloud "oh hahaha what a fucking dumbass" or something. I knew she at least called him a dumbass but holy SHIT I was pissed. I hurry closer and help the old guy up, he thanks me and finally I get to leave about fifteen minutes later. Still fuming about that whole mess, I got into my car and started the drive home. Of course the roads were awful but really nobody was in the ditch, but some people had pulled over. Used to driving in shit conditions, I just went onward until I saw this ridiculous foreign car in the ditch some ways and I stop to see if they're alright. GUESS WHO'S THE DRIVER! That's fucking right, the same broad who stepped over the old man and I step out to greet her. She opened up with a long list of complaints, how it sucked here, small towns are shit, that whole thing and I just smiled and let her go on and on. The following conversation and the best part of my day happened next:
"Well, sounds like you've got all sorts of issues. You call somebody to pick you up?"
"Yeah, they'll be here but than-*"
"GOOD! Good. I love living here, you know, these shitty small towns, the smelly animals, the weather, all of it is home to me. I also love how I can tell if somebody isn't from here, because they're not arrogant, sanctimonious cocksuckers like you! They also don't step over old men who fall down in Wal-Mart and remark about how they're a 'dumbass' and keep on walking. You know, I can't wait for the weekend to be over so you and your kind get the FUCK out of my woods."
I got in, slammed my door and sped off. I was angry, but it kind of felt good to tell her off but I did feel [i]slightly[/i] bad for leaving her there.[/QUOTE]
That may have been very wrong but words cannot describe how much she deserved that.
If anyone in here works at a Subway, I work with the team developing new POS terminals, so if you have any recommendations or complaints about SubShop 2000, I'd be glad to take them.
[QUOTE=bobsmit;32292150]If anyone in here works at a Subway, I work with the team developing new POS terminals, so if you have any recommendations or complaints about SubShop 2000, I'd be glad to take them.[/QUOTE]
Change the name. I mean SubShop2000 is incredibly lame, even for a POS terminal.
[QUOTE=bobsmit;32292150]If anyone in here works at a Subway, I work with the team developing new POS terminals, so if you have any recommendations or complaints about SubShop 2000, I'd be glad to take them.[/QUOTE]
free sammiches.
My mom just told me about this lady in the store.
She was taking the yogurt 4 packs, and snapping them in half into two, and then one (She only wanted one cup, instead of 4)
"Excuse me, those are 4 packs, you have to buy all of them, you can't just take one, there are single cups over there if you want"
"Oh, It's not a problem, I do this all the time!"
"You're not supposed to, either take all of them or grab one of the single ones over there."
"Oh, I'm sorry, I'll do that next time"
The lady took 2 "Single" Cups of yogurt, but was charged for the price of a 4 pack for each cup, paying 4x more than she could have for 2 things of yogurt.
The Customer Must Always "Win".
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