Embarrassing Situations Thread V1.0 - Oh, the shame! - General

One time I was at Wal-Mart in the cat food aisle when suddenly a mentally challenged kid who looks like the Retarded Policeman comes running down the cat food aisle in his underwear screaming "DINOSAURS!!!". I had previously seen the kid in the toy aisle with his Mom talking about what toy dinosaurs they wanna buy and I guess he had the urge to scream for his love of toy dinosaurs in the cat food aisle.....in his underwear.

[QUOTE=Noi;36820778]I've "played" with some boy's dick in kindergarten. What a shame.[/QUOTE] [QUOTE=Noi;36820873]I can say that he enjoyed it.[/QUOTE] that was quick [editline]18th July 2012[/editline] [QUOTE=Mon;36799901]in kindergarten i showed my dick for show and tell good times[/QUOTE] well assuming this was a joke anyway

Back in 6th grade I went to camp with my friends. On the last day, our teachers told us to go to the bathroom before we took the bus back home. I was excited to go home so I walked into the bathroom and kicked the one of the stall doors open. Needless to say, someone was still pisssing in there and let out a loud OW! I ran to the bus as fast as I could and after a few mintutes, we left. I still didn't get to piss though.

[QUOTE=BaCkStAbEr;36820648]I have a bunch from my school days, can't remember them all although Accidentally hitting on the teacher in front of the class. (Don't ask) Falling asleep over a test and drooling all over it to the point the paper starts dissolving. Letting out an extremely loud burp when the class is silent and when you're the quiet/shy guy in class. Talking with friends about how hot/ugly are the girls in class and completely failing to notice the girls hearing us. Accidentally making a kid trip over your leg and him ending up with a broken arm. Talking to your friends and not noticing you ended up looking like a retard/asshole in front of your crush. Asking a girl out, she says "who's coming with us?" when you explain its a date, she pretty much ends up saying no.[/QUOTE] Just remembered some more: One time when I was little I went to the dentist to take a single tooth off, she gave me the drugs and all that, when she was going to pull it off, I remember her pushing my face into her boobs, wich were pretty nice btw, when I noticed I was going all "Hmmm, yeah babe" out loud in front of my mom and the dentist. Other time when I was little I was at the supermarket with my parents, and there was a broom in the cart, I started playing around with the cart and I ended up pushing everything, from cans to glass containers, with the broom off the shelf, the supermarket guys were nice and we didn't have to pay for anything. And many countless others experiences in class when you are the shy/quiet guy.

a long time ago i had this indian girlfriend. we were fooling around in her room and her dad barges in on us. now the room is speechless for about a minute as he looks at us with a particular silent malice. after about 2 minutes, thinking i'm going to be gutted by this old-world man, i say "very sorry" and i jumped out the window thinking i'm some kind of indestructible action hero into rubbish bins and injured my ankle so the last thing they saw was a half-naked boy with a limp skipping away. that was probably the most embarrassing moment of my life.

This dredged up a memory I had long suppressed, but alright. I was about seven or eight, and my parents had enrolled me into tai-quon-do (I quit, it sucked). Naturally, the first thing you get taught is the defensive stance and a "battle cry" to pump yourself up for a boost of strength and confidence. Naturally, I had the confidence, strength, and fortitude of an ant, so that did nothing more then project an invisible bubble. A bubble which I unfortunately thought would make my enemies "cower in fear" (yes, they said this). So I'm playing with my brother who, unfortunately, was hanging with the wrong folk at the time, when they start pushing me around. They shove me into the ground, laugh and jeer, all that. Naturally, I start crying (because bear in mind, this shit still hurt). I'm on one knee at this moment in time, when one of them walks up to me and says something along the lines of "aww, are you crying? Look everyone! This wimp is crying!" And I growled. I audibly growled, and slowly stood up, like the action heroes in my cartoons. With a snap, I got into my defensive stance and let out a loud, tear-distorted war shout... Which did nothing more then make them laugh, mock me further, and leave me alone to my crying, broken self. Thinking back, that's probably why I quit the martial art; It failed me when I needed it most. But yeah. Thoroughly embarrassing. The only thing I can imagine rivaling that was my freshman year of high school when I was being bullied for folding origami and I told them I'd use origami-fu to defeat them. They never let me hear the end of it. I actually had to switch schools because everyone in the halls would mention how skilled I was at origami-fu.

One time in kindergarten, I was sitting in the back of the bus after a field trip. These two kids were sitting there doing stupid shit. Both of them were friends. One of them decided to play the "spitting game" where they pretended to spit at each other. Of course I, being the little dumbfuck I was, thought that they were actually spitting. So naturally, wanting to join in, I lean in close and spit right in this kids face. He just stared at me like a deer in the headlights. The worst part, however, was that his dad (Some big burly dude who kind of looked like a muscular Jamie from Mytherbusters) yells at me. Let me tell you, being yelled at by Muscle Man Jamie Heinaman is not fucking fun.

one time in camp i think i was 13 it was the first time of me making my own coffee (thats all i had to drink and i hated it back then) but for some reason I LOVED IT LIKE HARDCORE and made myself so many coffees. The coffees made me really sick and gave me bad flatulence, I was getting friendly with a hot chick and all, there where some other people but we were mainly talking to each other. some one made a really funny joke which made me laugh out loud but with my flatulence my bowel and anus decide to pair up and betray me... a loud SHHHHHHHHHRFIFFFFFFRT!!!!!! got released from my ass hole and it stunk pretty bad, i had just shit my pants and everyone was laughing and spread it throughout the whole camp, embarrassing times...

I think a humongous fart at the dinner table while having dinner with a friend and his whole family, followed by everyone staring at me in silence for 30 seconds should qualify for this thread.

I once shoved a chocolate muffin into my mouth and started laughing, causing many bits and pieces of it to fly directly into the face of my crush. A similar incident happened years later with cookies and pepsi.

One time in 4th grade we were playing pin dodge in gym class (a type of dodge ball that you win by hitting all the players on the other team or knocking down several blowling pins placed far apart on the wall behind them) It was down to just a few people on our team and I took up the job of guarding our last pin. Now our gym teacher was the coolest motherfucker on the planet. His name was Mr. Hammer, sported a Yoshi jacket and made up the coolest games ever but he threw like he meant it in dodge ball. He threw a straight shot right at my chest, an easy catch that would net us two more players back in the game. I opened my arms ready to catch and the two guys at the "out" line were getting ready to jump back in. All eyes were on the speed ball Mr. Hammer just cannon balled my way. Just to be clear we used the rubber balls that packed quite a punch when thrown like that. It hit me square in the chest, my hands missed it there was a loud *PING* from the ball fallowed by a really loud clap from my hands missing the damn thing and then a "HNNNNG" from the air being knocked out of me. To make it even worse I fell back and knocked over our last pin. Both teams erupted in laughter and thinking back I probably did look pretty hilarious. My face red with embarrassment at the time Mr. Hammer ran over and asked if I was ok. He sent everyone back to class after the bell and took me to his office and apologized (I think he thought he hit me in the face, it was pretty red) and gave me a signed hall pass and a Coke from his mini fridge.

I've remembered another incident of mine, again from school. I was always the quiet, smart one in class. The one who glowered relentlessly at you if you poked fun at me. Before I started to open up a bit towards the end of school, I tried my best to keep myself out of trouble. My French teacher was a very short and wide woman with close-cut white hair and glasses. She always wore a colourful dress, but the result was intimidating. Despite her size, she had a very loud voice and bad temper. She was nicer to me than to the other students, but that didn't prevent her from dishing out punishments without hesitation if I were to slip up. The pupils nicknamed her 'The Penguin', because she had a sort of waddling gait. One morning I failed to hand in my French work. It was my fault, the subject was mandatory for the first few years of that school and I had no real enthusiasm for it. So when it was my turn to go up to her desk and hand it over, I put on a neutral expression and, making the sentence as long as physically possible, presented my excuses. She saw through my verbosity straight away, and laid down my sentence: "Go to the main hall after lessons." The main hall could only mean a 45 minute detention. If word got out, the rest of the week would be unbearable. So I strove to keep it a secret for the rest of the day. The final class was double geography, which I liked. Halfway through, an office runner came into the class with a red (Uh oh) note and gave it to the teacher. I knew what was going to happen. "No sir, I know what it is!", I quickly said before getting up to retrieve the note. But he read it out anyway..."[NAME HERE], you have a 45 minute (Tut tut) detention with [TEACHER NAME HERE] after this lesson." So I sat back down, defeated, and glared (If looks could kill) at everyone who was staring at me. Then the laughter began. Perhaps I put that in more words than necessary, but I felt like being a bit descriptive.

One time I was on my bike, and I needed to get up onto the curb, so I lifted up on the bars like I always did, but this time, when I came down, the shocks bottomed out, and I flipped over, and the bike followed, I almost hit some lady, who had a look of "Holy shit are you okay?" I was in pain, but I quickly scrambled to my feet, and rode off like nothing ever happened. I fell asleep in history class, and woke up with a different teacher staring me in the face. My history teacher had other classes in that room after mine, so that means I slept through not only my class period, but the one after, and half way through another.

[QUOTE=Slowbro;36816957]Calling the teacher mum. Come on, we've all been there.[/QUOTE] After been away with cadets for a week, the next time I was back at school I ended up calling three teachers Staff, Sergeant and Ma'am. They were very confused.

On my Gr.8 grad field trip we went to a summer camp thing for a week. The boys room was right across from the girls in the same building no more 10 feet. Now in primary school I was a man whore I pretty much groped girls all day everyday (because they let me). So on this trip I had finished breakfast early and so did 2 girls. We went back and spooned and thats when the chaperone walked in...the rest if the trip was we awkwardly avoiding her with my confidence destroyed

a small incident happened at my junior's school once. I don't know about other schools, but this one had a "disco" towards the end of the school year, which was basically just a dance with a more embarrassing name. I was, like, eight at the time. now, I used to be (or at least I thought I was) really flexible and dexterous, and I liked to do what I told myself was a spin that resembled some break-dancing bullshit. you got awards for being a good dancer (nothing special, just some sweets), so naturally I tried to do said spinny thing because it was the only move I knew that didn't make me look like an Elvis impersonator. it actually seemed like it went really well, right up until I got up from it and realized I'd inadvertently kicked two girls square in the face. I ran away and spent the rest of the evening outside, still somehow won the award for second-best dancer.

Oh yeah, list of embarrassing situations: Farting in a lecture. Calling your mum/dad Miss or Sir. Proper story: One day in pre-school (English kindergarten), we were asked which song we wanted to sing. Recently, my brother had shown me a funny video of cats singing 'Gay Bar'. The next bit really doesn't need explaining. I said to the teacher 'Gay bar' and she said 'Oh. How does that go?' I sung the entire first verse. Also once in this supermarket when I was like 4, I saw some people twice and on the second time pointed and said 'Look! There they are again!' The man just glared and so did his 2 daughters.

a few months ago my family was showing around a [i]very[/i] important person, we go to some mall, I grab one of those map-pamphlets and as I'm reading it I walk shins-first into a hugeass potted plant laugh it off, pretend it didn't happen, not 30 fucking seconds later I do the exact same thing again needless to say it bruised my shins pretty badly and that sets the stage for part 2 of this horrible saga that next week, school gets out one afternoon, everything's normal, I get on the bus go to give this girl a hug (she always hugs me when she sees me, I swear), she was on her knees on the seat facing the window and didn't see me second my arm goes around her my shins bump into the metal edge of the seat, I fall down on top of her and we presume doggy position [img]http://i.imgur.com/YuLSt.png[/img]

[QUOTE=Timenova;36822333]I've remembered another incident of mine, again from school. I was always the quiet, smart one in class. The one who glowered relentlessly at you if you poked fun at me. Before I started to open up a bit towards the end of school, I tried my best to keep myself out of trouble. My French teacher was a very short and wide woman with close-cut white hair and glasses. She always wore a colourful dress, but the result was intimidating. Despite her size, she had a very loud voice and bad temper. She was nicer to me than to the other students, but that didn't prevent her from dishing out punishments without hesitation if I were to slip up. The pupils nicknamed her 'The Penguin', because she had a sort of waddling gait. One morning I failed to hand in my French work. It was my fault, the subject was mandatory for the first few years of that school and I had no real enthusiasm for it. So when it was my turn to go up to her desk and hand it over, I put on a neutral expression and, making the sentence as long as physically possible, presented my excuses. She saw through my verbosity straight away, and laid down my sentence: "Go to the main hall after lessons." The main hall could only mean a 45 minute detention. If word got out, the rest of the week would be unbearable. So I strove to keep it a secret for the rest of the day. The final class was double geography, which I liked. Halfway through, an office runner came into the class with a red (Uh oh) note and gave it to the teacher. I knew what was going to happen. "No sir, I know what it is!", I quickly said before getting up to retrieve the note. But he read it out anyway..."[NAME HERE], you have a 45 minute (Tut tut) detention with [TEACHER NAME HERE] after this lesson." So I sat back down, defeated, and glared (If looks could kill) at everyone who was staring at me. Then the laughter began. Perhaps I put that in more words than necessary, but I felt like being a bit descriptive.[/QUOTE] I once got a detention but everyone sorta forgot about it so I never went. Zero detentions in my K-12 record, awww yeah.

fuck i was late

I remember my 8th grade gym class being particularly hellish.The class was coming to a close and I was sitting down against the wall talking to my friend when I noticed my shoe was untied. So I lean over to tie my shoe... And some kid comes up, sits on my back, and belts out this ungodly loud fart. I am trapped under a hundred or so pounds of dead weight, so I can't sit up. Meanwhile, my friend is sitting there laughing like a tard as I sit there, being bombarded by ass gas. When he is done with his demonic ass antics. He stands up, and walks away like nothing happened. The entire class is just standing there, astonished at what they saw. I've got more if you guys want to hear them

[QUOTE=OficerHonkHonk;36825218]I remember my 8th grade gym class being particularly hellish.The class was coming to a close and I was sitting down against the wall talking to my friend when I noticed my shoe was untied. So I lean over to tie my shoe... And some kid comes up, sits on my back, and belts out this ungodly loud fart. I am trapped under a hundred or so pounds of dead weight, so I can't sit up. Meanwhile, my friend is sitting there laughing like a tard as I sit there, being bombarded by ass gas. When he is done with his demonic ass antics. He stands up, and walks away like nothing happened. The entire class is just standing there, astonished at what they saw. I've got more if you guys want to hear them[/QUOTE] Do tell.

Once I had my backpack under my shirt (don't ask why) and the PE teacher almost ran me over with his golf cart Then he said, in front of my friends, that he doesn't hit pregnant women It was funny but good god embarrassing. Also, once my friends and I were wrestling at lunch and then the bell for 5 period rang and as I started running to class I tripped over my own backpack.

[QUOTE=Timenova;36822333] I was always the quiet, smart one in class. The one who glowered relentlessly at you if you poked fun at me. Before I started to open up a bit towards the end of school, I tried my best to keep myself out of trouble.[/QUOTE] you know you look like a massive asshat when you say that shit, right?

In year 6, we moved to our current city. I had to start at a new school, year 6, and no-one else knew me. So, i've always been a weird character, not the "Yui is mai Waifu" weird, or "Your socks smell really good today, Jane". I've been more completely random facts and jokes guys, these jokes know no bounds. I kind of lack a "Social filter". That's unrelated to the matter. As the year six class, we had to clean all the bins around the school. We lacked garbage bags so we had to fills them with water to get some shit out. I noticed one of my friends was fucking with Taylor by putting the bin over her head (Clean). We thought is was funny and she, now that i look back, i don't think it was bulying as such, just messing around. Anywho, i decided to join in. Can you guess whats going to happen? Yeah you can. I turnd it upside down on her head when it still had Garbage water in it, stinky, smelly, rotting, garbage water. It got in her hair and all down her clothes. I apologized a bunch and she just went to the bathroom to clean up. As you can imagine, i got an earfull later that day from my teacher. I was good friends with everyone in yr6, same i've stopped talking to all but 2 of them. I remember another time when we were sitting in music or indonesian, something, and me and Taj (Yeah, his nickname was Taj Mahal) were having a grand old chat. Remember what i said earlier about Jokes? Yeah, sometimes they miss completely, or sounded much better in my head. I was pretty imature at the time and ended up saying something like "Wouldn't it be funny if Mr.X came in and said "Ash you sexy beast, get over here" and they charged out the door and flew off into the sunset". Oh couse, he just here "Ash you sexy beast, that got morphed into Ash IS a sexy beast. (Cochlear implants fucked with his hearing, he's also had over 170 operations because he drank bleach or ammonia as a child and it fucked his whole oesophagus. Poor guy), he was like, what the fuck man, he procceded to laugh at me, even though i tried to tell him otherwise. Then, i don't know why, he told one of the girls, who then told another. It then reached Ash. I looked helplessly as Taj laughed at me and i saw one by one, the girls leaning over and wispering to one another. Then it reached Ash, she turned around and looked at me. I didn't know what to do, so i just sighed and shook my head. I didn't talk to her much for the rest of the year. Although, i did give her a pretty bad slide tackle when we all played soccer on the oval. (Like i said, we were all friends). I dunno, haven't talked to her since i left. I guess the last time was near the end of the year, where i was emptying bins and walked past the Kindergarten (Or prep, whatever) class. The door was open, it just so happened that the girls of the kinder class were changing after their swim. I saw everything. I grabbed the bin (Outside the classroom, i don't know why i looked in), and walked really fast outta there. My mate (At the time) didn't notice squat. I'm not a pedo btw, and i'm glad i can't remember it. Although /b/ did a wonderful job of making sure i don't know what a kid looks like naked. (Oh god it was a thumbnail, she god damn looked 18 in he thumbnail.) (I may have lied in the last bracket). I can't think of more. I might be able to, you guys want more?

[QUOTE=bunnyspy1;36825531]you know you look like a massive asshat when you say that shit, right?[/QUOTE] I didn't, actually. No offence was meant, I tried making it look humorous (Backfiring, it seems). I didn't mean to come across as a douche. This in itself is a somewhat embarrassing situation.

This one time, it must have been around year 4-5. Everyone was outside waiting for the school buses. As I was walking to my bus I saw my neighbor and decided I would come up behind him and give him a surprise. I walked up behind him and put my hand on his shoulder and said: [i]"Hey, asshole!"[/i] When he turned around I was shocked to find that the kid I thought was my neighbor was actually a complete stranger. With a deer-in-headlights expression I just said [i]"I'm sorry."[/i] and got away as fast as I could. (I actually don't remember what I said to the chap. The embarrassment of the situation caused a lapse of memory.)

[QUOTE=UberMunchkin;36824646]Whenever I'm asked to say out an answer in class. I can't go 6 words without ending up stopping, and having to repeat myself, as sometimes I just end up not being able to say anything for a few seconds. And then I end up stuttering for the rest of the sentence, while everyone else is quietly laughing at me.[/QUOTE] I found that volunteering to answer helps you with that. Also, that way, you won't actually be picked for ones you will do poorly on.

One time in drama class a girl asked me if I could poledance, thinking fast and trying to be funny I said "Only if you're the pole" The entire class laughed, I got nicknamed "the poledancer" the rest of the year.

[QUOTE=Kirbyfactor;36827034]One time in drama class a girl asked me if I could poledance, thinking fast and trying to be funny I said "Only if you're the pole" The entire class laughed, I got nicknamed "the poledancer" the rest of the year.[/QUOTE] Thats not embarrassing, you should be proud of that.