Embarrassing Situations Thread V1.0 - Oh, the shame! - General

[QUOTE=znk666;36796415]Not being able to understand what a person is saying although you have asked the person to repeat it twice.[/QUOTE] Having hearing loss makes this a VERY common occurrence. Happens to me, happens to my dad. Urgh. And then they have the audacity to blame you for not making them out.

[QUOTE=Kirbyfactor;36827034]One time in drama class a girl asked me if I could poledance, thinking fast and trying to be funny I said "Only if you're the pole" The entire class laughed, I got nicknamed "the poledancer" the rest of the year.[/QUOTE] Verboten de lachen!

Once also in 7th grade, i came out to my best friend, he took it well and to this day we're still friends (He's also a Facepuncher, He's Certified) Well, he was being messed with in the hall because he wasn't the most popular kid there and the bully called him gay, but just to mess with that prick he said "i'm not gay *points to me* He's gay! The bully responds "You going to take that Steve?" (For some reason the bully thought i was cool because i was friends with one of the main jocks) and asked if i was going to stand up for myself, i just walked off to class with a little bit of life drained from me.

Well I've got a story. When I was in 7th grade, I played football. During the off season (spring), we would be put into the gym class. One particular day, we went outside to do drills and stuff. It was easy for everyone except for the fat kids. We ran around the track, etc and then we got onto the football field to do suicides and the like. Well after we finished it was technically free time. So a lot of people played soccer and football, but I was pretty tired that day. So I went over with one friend to fuck around on the pole vaulting thing. We were having fun jumping over the bar and this group comes over to join in. We didn't care. It was a lot of fun. One of the fattest motherfuckers at the school decided it'd be a great place to lay down after barely finishing the drills from today. It was okay for a while and no one cared, but when it was my turn to jump over the bar, he moved into the place where I was going to land. I asked him to move and he did. So I started running and I jumped over the bar. Now in that second, he scooted his knees into the exact place where my face was going to land. My face smashed into his knee and it hurt A LOT. I stood up and said, "it's cool man, what the fuck's wrong with you." I was so disoriented I didn't know what i said. So he says sorry and walks off with the group. I stand over to the side and watch my friend pole vault one more time. He gets off the mat and walks over to me. "Milo, I think you should go to the nurse." "Why?" I look down at my shirt and it's covered in blood. It was a white shirt and it looked like you opened up the ketchup bottle and just stomped on it. Blood was everywhere. It dripped off my lip and my chin. I didn't even feel that. So I walked over to my asian coach and said, "Coach, I think I should go to the nurse." He responded with, "holy shit, let's get you over there now." So I go to the nurses office and she puts gauze in my nose to stop the bleeding. I start choking and say there's blood in my mouth now. She's all, "you'll be fine, just go back to class." So I walk over to the locker room and get my backpack out of the locker. My next class is orchestra with a great teacher. So I set my stuff down in the room and he tells me to relax and I don't have to play today. Well I sit back there and I start to feel the pain of my nose. It gets so bad that I start choking back tears. At one point the orchestra stops playing and it's so bad, I let out a rape scream of pain and suffering. Everyone turns around and the teacher looks at me. Blood is pouring out of my mouth and everyone screams. There's tears and blood coming out of me. The teacher calls my mom and I'm taken home for the day. One of the most embarrassing things that's ever happened to me. My nose never healed completely, so it's still really big. I've got some others that I'll write.

[QUOTE=Unreliable;36828919]Well I've got a story. When I was in 7th grade, I played football. During the off season (spring), we would be put into the gym class. One particular day, we went outside to do drills and stuff. It was easy for everyone except for the fat kids. We ran around the track, etc and then we got onto the football field to do suicides and the like. Well after we finished it was technically free time. So a lot of people played soccer and football, but I was pretty tired that day. So I went over with one friend to fuck around on the pole vaulting thing. We were having fun jumping over the bar and this group comes over to join in. We didn't care. It was a lot of fun. One of the fattest motherfuckers at the school decided it'd be a great place to lay down after barely finishing the drills from today. It was okay for a while and no one cared, but when it was my turn to jump over the bar, he moved into the place where I was going to land. I asked him to move and he did. So I started running and I jumped over the bar. Now in that second, he scooted his knees into the exact place where my face was going to land. My face smashed into his knee and it hurt A LOT. I stood up and said, "it's cool man, what the fuck's wrong with you." I was so disoriented I didn't know what i said. So he says sorry and walks off with the group. I stand over to the side and watch my friend pole vault one more time. He gets off the mat and walks over to me. "Milo, I think you should go to the nurse." "Why?" I look down at my shirt and it's covered in blood. It was a white shirt and it looked like you opened up the ketchup bottle and just stomped on it. Blood was everywhere. It dripped off my lip and my chin. I didn't even feel that. So I walked over to my asian coach and said, "Coach, I think I should go to the nurse." He responded with, "holy shit, let's get you over there now." So I go to the nurses office and she puts gauze in my nose to stop the bleeding. I start choking and say there's blood in my mouth now. She's all, "you'll be fine, just go back to class." So I walk over to the locker room and get my backpack out of the locker. My next class is orchestra with a great teacher. So I set my stuff down in the room and he tells me to relax and I don't have to play today. Well I sit back there and I start to feel the pain of my nose. It gets so bad that I start choking back tears. At one point the orchestra stops playing and it's so bad, I let out a rape scream of pain and suffering. Everyone turns around and the teacher looks at me. Blood is pouring out of my mouth and everyone screams. There's tears and blood coming out of me. The teacher calls my mom and I'm taken home for the day. One of the most embarrassing things that's ever happened to me. My nose never healed completely, so it's still really big. I've got some others that I'll write.[/QUOTE] find that fat fuck and kick his ass

One time I was racing a 1600m time trial for Track & Field, and the second I ran past the area of the track with the whole girls team (40+ girls) a fart slipped out and I was mortified. When you're racing, you can't really help it D: I think they laughed... oh god the laughter...

I had a close call once.. When I was 15 I always had to take a bus home, I always sat way in the back. One day on the way home my wang happened to be in the right position to absorb the vibrations (if you've been on a bus you should know how much it vibrates) Well, I did what most hormonal 15 year olds would do and just sit back and enjoy it, I was going to move when I was close to climaxing so I wouldn't do it in my pants but somehow it came faster than I was prepared for. Luckily it was winter so i had thick pants and a jacket on. Thankfully I'm not one of those people who make noises, arches their back, or make crazy faces when they orgasm. If it was summer I almost surely would've had to walk down the whole bus with a wet mark. :suicide::suicide::suicide::suicide::suicide::suicide: Long story short my schoolbus vibrations made me jizz in my pants 7 years ago.

[QUOTE=TonyP;36829358]I had a close call once.. When I was 15 I had to take a bus home, I always sat way in the back. One day on the way home my wang happened to be in the right position to absorb the vibrations (if you've been on a bus you should know how much it vibrates) Well, I did what most hormonal 15 year olds would do and just sit back and enjoy it, I was going to move when I was close to climaxing so I wouldn't do it in my pants but somehow it came faster than I was prepared for. Luckily it was winter so i had thick pants and a jacket on. Thankfully I'm not one of those people who make noises or moves around when they orgasm. If it was summer I almost surely would've had to walk down the whole bus with a wet mark. :suicide::suicide::suicide::suicide::suicide::suicide: Long story short my schoolbus gave me a blowjob.[/QUOTE] How what uh

You have the weirdest penile stimulation ever, man. This coming from a regular bus rider. But yeah, sitting in the back of the bus saves you a lot of trouble. In my country there's this military day in which we all have t go to when we're 18. So basically a military bus comes to pick us up randomly to visit the military facilities near our cities. So basically we get assigned random buses according to where we live. I happened to find a friend of mine there so I stick by him the hole trip. As we were entering the bus I noticed there were a lot of chavs there. You know. Kinds of guys who're always up for no good. Started looking at us like we were the victims. After realizing this i said to my friend, "we have to seat on the back or else these guys will give us a bad time. He confidently replied no. "are you kidding, they will all want to be on the back of the bus, we'll be better of near the front or middle". I tried to warn him but he didn't listen. Oh, one more thing. This friend of mine had quite big and salient ears and back in kindergarten kids used to give him a bad time because of them so it wasn't going to be any different with those guys on the bus. So I sat on the back, didn't have any trouble mingling with people there and guys didn't give much credit to me because of the way I dressed and looked. jeans, metal tshirt and long hair. (who would give a bad time on the back seat to a guy like this, right?). My friend was very different. He dressed very good: blouse, jeans and sailing shoes. So yeah, to a bunch of poor neighbourhood sods, that guy was the impersonation of the rich guy who's gonna get it. This wasn't embarrassing to me but I could only imagine how it could have been to him. I was listening to music when I see a great commotion on the front. I lean forward to see what was going on and they were poking his ears with a soda straw and laughing their asses off. When we arrived he was mad and I was all, "so I heard you had a great time with the lads riding on the front?" :v: "Fuck you!"

What's so weird about vibrations getting a person off?

embarrassing situations? my life 1992 to present

Here's a story. So i was 5 years old and i wanted to go to Schlitterbahn with my old man. After hours of whining and bitching i got my way. It was going to be the best day in the world. Well we went on probably every ride in the whole park and we were tired and hungry. We stopped at one of Schlitterbahns many high class eating facilities to grab a bite. There was some music jammin over the speakers, so i decided to boogie down. After about five seconds, god only knows why, i whipped out my massive five year old shlong out. There were some hotties on the deck overlooking my father and I. They broke out in laughter. They obviously wanted my dick.

farting after anal sex

I have a tendency to mumble little quips. I was sitting in math class, one row from the front and to the left center of the room. This was junior year. Anyway, my teacher says something along the lines of "and if you put these two numbers together...you get a really big number..." and I ended up saying, "like my dick." After taking notes for the next few seconds, since I never looked up, I realized I'd actually said that aloud in the silence that now surrounded the room. I turned around and my friend, who always sat adjacent to me, had this look of death on my face. My teacher said nothing and continued on as a few people giggled. Not sure if this is embarrassing, but I like the story anyway: Also in junior year (for those in other countries, that's the second to last year of high school, age 16), we had to do a project surrounding a local amusement park's rides in physics class. Each group had to do three rides and figure out something about the ride. I was tasked with "The Big Pink Slide," or one of those slides where you get one of those tattered towels and go down it at an oddly fast pace. My introduction to this part of our presentation was, "And now onto The Big Pink Slide, which is a metaphor for birth." My teacher fucking lost it and just put his head on the desk laughing, followed by a few girls shouting "ewwwwww" and others getting it about 10 seconds after the fact. I got an A+ in the humor score on our presentation, which was an actual part of the rubric. The story of how I found out I was lactose intolerant: When I was 17, I had to stay at a friend's house for a few days as my father was out of town and I had no other way to get to school. On the weekend, he had to get up early to go to his robotics club meeting and I was toted along. My friend and his father stopped at Starbucks and I was offered a beverage. It should be known that I don't care for coffee unless it has a lot of cream in it. A few hours pass and we get back to his place and are fucking with each other in New Super Mario Bros. Wii. I feel my stomach rumble and I adjust my posture to fart and be classy as fuck and laugh about it. Turns out I shit my pants on my couch. He realized this when my face lost all its color and I started to slowly get up with him yelling, "DUDE, GET THE FUCK OFF MY COUCH." We later walked to Carl's Jr. to meet up with another friend and I shit myself in the booth. Walked home with my unders in my back pocket wrapped in paper towels. I don't drink milk anymore, but I can still have cheeses and dairy desserts.

[QUOTE=Funion;36832524]farting after anal sex[/QUOTE] sorry

Didn't happen to me but it was really awkward for everyone else. Someone tried to pull someone's pants down, and they succeeded but the pants ripped somehow and you could see this guy's fucking filthy undies wet at the front and brown stains at the back. Nobody ever went near him for a week.

I shit in a urinal once when I was 4 because I thought it was just a different type of toilet. All I remember was it being very cold.

[QUOTE=OvB;36824712]I once got a detention but everyone sorta forgot about it so I never went. Zero detentions in my K-12 record, awww yeah.[/QUOTE] Out of the 50+ detentions I've received, I've only taken two or three. Though I have decided to just hang around in the detention room sometimes when I was never assigned one, if the teacher is cool.

Was doing weight lifting today, some idiot hit me in the back of the head with a weight, disoriented, I plow forwards. Into my crush's boobs. :v:

Once, several years ago, me, my brother, and the local "kid nobody likes but everyone is friends with" were at the pool late. It was about 7 and the pool closed, but for whatever reason we decided not to walk home by the street. Our neighborhood was right next to a really swampy forest, and we decided we'd walk along the edge between the woods and people's back yards. The whole time I kept declaring our new route "the bandito way" because I was kind of an irritating kid. Partway through we had to sort of bushwhack through spiny plants and all sorts of junk. I got pretty upset. Eventually we came across some sort of obstacle we couldn't get past (I think it was a bunch of spiky bushes too close together to weave between without injuring ourselves.) We ended up passing through someone's back yard and walking home the normal way. Except there were police there for whatever reason so we panicked and thought we'd be arrested for trespassing.

I remember a while ago I was at a fast food place with two chicks. I decided it would be a fantastic idea to drink a soda with like 20 straws. I laughed while drinking it and soda flew everywhere. They thought it was hilarious but I was still embarrassed.

Down here in Georgia, there's this buffet called "Ryan's" (sadly, all of them have closed and they're no longer available) and I was going through the buffet, keep in mind that I'm only 12 at the time. My dad is a big fellow, has a beer belly and everything and was with me the whole time, without noticing he walks away and I start digging into the sweet potatoes and a large burly man, with the same kind of gut comes up next to me and starts digging into it as well and without looking up I say, "Hey, stop, you're gonna steal it all!" with a little laugh and nudge him in a joking manner. Then I look up and notice that it's NOT my dad and he just stares at me like I was just a little shit being annoying in the buffet line. I walk quietly back to the table and felt ashamed the entire day. It still haunts me to this day.

One time in middle school, I was walking down the hall pushing a friend around as aggressive younger kids do, and he gets super mad for some reason. Conveniently, the meanest teacher in the school was walking past right as he shoved me full-force back, and I fly into the teacher. She starts screaming profanities at me, and drags both of us to the principal. Long story short, I got suspended for 2 days even after explaining the situation. Best part is, I was a sort of secretary's aide, so I had to sit there in front of all them waiting for the principal to see me.

Winter 2010 my girlfriend and I were making out and my nose suddenly started bleeding out of nowhere all over her face. It was horrifying at the time but she laughed it off after we cleaned up the mess.

[QUOTE=insane taco;36835934]Winter 2010 my girlfriend and I were making out and my nose suddenly started bleeding out of nowhere all over her face. It was horrifying at the time but she laughed it off after we cleaned up the mess.[/QUOTE] did you fuck or what?

[QUOTE=mastfire;36836060]did you fuck or what?[/QUOTE] No not that night.

[QUOTE=Noi;36835575]We need more gay stories.[/QUOTE] Not quite sure if this fits, but here's one anyway. This didn't happen to me, but to my father. He was in New Orleans for some business bullshit (I remember him saying "It's for some stupid leadership training or something the higher-ups are sending all the department managers to. I don't need it! But hey, free trip to New Orleans!") So one day after one of the training sessions, he decides he wants a beer, not even paying attention, he walks into the first bar he sees, and sits down at the counter. He orders his beer, and gets a bit of a strange look from the bartender. Hey pays for his drink, and the bartender leans over and says "Sir, you do realize this is a gay bar, right?". My father looks around the bar. "Oh... That would explain the choice in music.... Oh what the hell, the beer is cheaper here.". He continued to go there for the rest of the week.

Had a girl in my class come up to me (in front of the whole class) and tell me she dreamt about me (and she woke up and called her boyfriend with my name). Not that embarrassing, but I usually have an answer ready, this time I didn't know what to answer.

I remember the one time my grandma tried to take me to church I farted really loud when everybody was swallowing the bread or whatever it is. Wasn't really embarrassing to me personally(more my grandma), but I can guarantee you it was so bad they wouldn't let me back in even If I converted.

8th grade. Basically, I am a person who swears like a sailor when provoked or annoyed. We had a very old Maths teacher - she was almost 70 years old or something and was supposed to go off, but stayed because of a lack of teachers in Maths. She was that "old-school" person, who gets angered because of swearing. I had a couple of episodes where she would bash me for cussing. One day, I had to clean the blackboard and change the water with one of my classmates. He was all like "I am gonna change water!", so I had to clean. Instead of at least helping me a little (it was a very huge blackboard), he was just standing there, poking fun at me ("SCRUB HARDER"). Needless to say, I bursted into a stream of hate and curses and unleashed it all on him, the swearing lasted for several minutes. The teacher was standing behind my back all the time, I saw it in the looks of my friends. Before she could do anything, I turned to her and tried to reason. I saw her holding anger, but she made the annoying classmate clean the blackboard for several days instead. I can't say I was embarassed, but it's the closest situation I can remember.