Embarrassing Situations Thread V1.0 - Oh, the shame! - General

I'll keep it simple. I once took an apocalyptic shit in a crowed bathroom, managed to concoct an aroma that was pretty heinous while making noises rough enough to tighten the sphincters of the other bathroom users. Was taking a while to pass so I pulled out of my phone to play a game or two. The other users hung around, probably trying to snatch what breath they could to continue their exertions. It was then i made my mistake. I had a pretty shitty background on my phone and thought just a plain one would do for now. Surprise surprise, I didn't have one so I decided to take a picture with my thumb over the camera to give me a black background image. I press, and at full volume my phone goes. CHIK CLIK. Silence. I had to wait it out, hearing at least one person mumble "That good eh?"

Last week I was hanging out with some friends at a bar. I had to use the bar's bathroom to take a shit (because of diarrhea). While I was cleaning my ass, a woman opened the door. I was standing there, pants down, holding a dirty tissue in one hand and trying to close the door with the other. That smile she gave me when I got out. :smith:

My situation was even more terrible. I was drunk and updated my my status on Facebook as "I am a GAY"

[QUOTE=pulautikus;37786996]My situation was even more terrible. I was drunk and updated my my status on Facebook as "I am a GAY"[/QUOTE] wait how is that more terrible than any other on this page

It's just as bad as having friends 'hack' into your account and post "I likke black cock" or some stupid shit along those lines. Terrible second post.

[QUOTE=pulautikus;37786996]My situation was even more terrible. I was drunk and updated my my status on Facebook as "I am a GAY"[/QUOTE] It's terrible if you're twelve years old and got drunk off a shot of Listerine

[QUOTE=007JamesBond007;37784303]I once sent my best female friend a link to the wikipedia page on Vaginas. It had an accompanying note saying 'o.o is wikipedia allowed to put this shit on?'. I was trying to send it to my other friend but my hand slipped and clicked her instead. She just said 'O.o'. She is still my friend though :dance:[/QUOTE] are you fucking 10

Forgotten, I pulled the small metal shard out of my leg on the train/metro. Blood all over my fucking pants, everyone stares at me. Fuck people have issues.

On our last day of school its a tradition to prank other students and the teachers so long as its not dangerous and kept PG 13 so we went and got some dry ice, detergent and buckets and headed down to the staff room just before lunch. Filling the buckets with detergent and warm water when dropping the dry ice into it you have yourself an improvised bubble machine. By the time the lunch bell rang we were long gone and everyone walking past just saw the staff room almost entirely filled with bubbles with a confused bunch of teachers out the front. Oh and our canteen only had one double door sized hole in the brick wall that was the entrance and the exit so some other students got the exact dimensions of the space and built a fake wall to put in the space at lunch. They even went as far as to tek screw it to the pavement

[QUOTE=wizard`;37793453]On our last day of school its a tradition to prank other students and the teachers so long as its not dangerous and kept PG 13 so we went and got some dry ice, detergent and buckets and headed down to the staff room just before lunch. Filling the buckets with detergent and warm water when dropping the dry ice into it you have yourself an improvised bubble machine. By the time the lunch bell rang we were long gone and everyone walking past just saw the staff room almost entirely filled with bubbles with a confused bunch of teachers out the front. Oh and our canteen only had one double door sized hole in the brick wall that was the entrance and the exit so some other students got the exact dimensions of the space and built a fake wall to put in the space at lunch. They even went as far as to tek screw it to the pavement[/QUOTE] Wrong thread.

I'm fapping, but get bored and stop temporarily to browse some things on Facepunch. I go to the Fitness section and check out the MUSSELS thread because I wonder what's going on in there. I think you guys know where this is going. I'm scrolling past all of these pictures of guys and abs when my dad bursts into my room and see me with my dick out looking at pictures of guys. >mfw parents now think I'm gay.

[QUOTE=Repulsion;37794604]I'm fapping, but get bored and stop temporarily to browse some things on Facepunch. I go to the Fitness section and check out the MUSSELS thread because I wonder what's going on in there. I think you guys know where this is going. I'm scrolling past all of these pictures of guys and abs when my dad bursts into my room and see me with my dick out looking at pictures of guys. >mfw parents now think I'm gay.[/QUOTE] Why did you still have your dick out?

[QUOTE=Repulsion;37794604][B]I'm fapping, but get bored and stop temporarily[/B] to browse some things on Facepunch. I go to the Fitness section and check out the MUSSELS thread because I wonder what's going on in there. I think you guys know where this is going. I'm scrolling past all of these pictures of guys and abs when my dad bursts into my room and see me with my dick out looking at pictures of guys. >mfw parents now think I'm gay.[/QUOTE] ...What the hell?

i'm not gonna lie, I would sometimes take a break from a fap to look at mindless videos on youtube [editline]25th September 2012[/editline] with dick out and everything

I wouldn't know, as I don't masturbate anymore, when I did I didn't do that, so if it's something people commonly do I guess it's not weird then

Maybe his arm gets tired.

oh oohhhhh why did I remember this when I was almost 17, my two friends and I got drunk to the point when you can't walk straight, it was fun til those fucks decided to sleep on my bed, and I remember that my parents were arriving soon, and I had no idea how to get them out of the house guess what I did [sp]called my parents[/sp] [sp]at least it worked[/sp] \/:v:\/ [editline]25th September 2012[/editline] also succesfully avoided awkwardness once I was browsing /b/ on mom's notebook while she wasn't home, Incognito mode and shit. When I got finally bored I just closed the notebook assuming it would shutdown. After some time, hearing keys in the door lock I quickly remember that my mom asked me to look for something on the internet for her. I opened her notebook, and the first fucking thing I saw was an opened chrome tab with a scat gif I never clicked the close button so hard in my life.

[QUOTE=Sleepy Head;37796303]i'm not gonna lie, I would sometimes take a break from a fap to look at mindless videos on youtube [editline]25th September 2012[/editline] with dick out and everything[/QUOTE] You are in the wrong thread. Have a link: [url]http://facepunch.com/showthread.php?t=1205581[/url]

[QUOTE=007JamesBond007;37797320]You are in the wrong thread. Have a link: [url]http://facepunch.com/showthread.php?t=1205581[/url][/QUOTE] Fapping =/= gay

[QUOTE=007JamesBond007;37797320]You are in the wrong thread. Have a link: [url]http://facepunch.com/showthread.php?t=1205581[/url][/QUOTE] Stopping mid-fap doesn't make you gay. Are you 12 or something? There have been times where I've actually fallen asleep during a fap.

I spent three weeks in the third grade. in the economy class, I sat next to a guy I knew only by sight. whole class was talking to each other and the guy next to me began talking to me. In the beginning he talkt about reasonable things but later he asked me "how often do you mastrubate in a week?". At that moment the whole class was quiet and everyone looked at us. since then I didn't want to sit next to him anymore.

fapping now makes you gay [editline]25th September 2012[/editline] everyone is gay

I had a steam friend come back online after about two months so I jokingly said to him "WELL LOOK WHO ISN'T DEAD." It turns out he had been offline due to trying to commit suicide and failing. So that was a bit awkward.

[QUOTE=tratzzz;37786163]I am underage :c[/QUOTE] so am I :yarr:

So apparently after I passed out at a friend's place after having a little too much to drink, my dad called. Me being unconscious, I obviously could not answer so my semi-buzzed friend decided to take the call. "Yes, this is (my name) and I am asleep right now"

[QUOTE=Repulsion;37794604]I'm fapping, but get bored and stop temporarily to browse some things on Facepunch. I go to the Fitness section and check out the MUSSELS thread because I wonder what's going on in there. I think you guys know where this is going. I'm scrolling past all of these pictures of guys and abs when my dad bursts into my room and see me with my dick out looking at pictures of guys. >mfw parents now think I'm gay.[/QUOTE] Be happy it was just men, and not something worse. Happened to me a while ago: Browsing Facepunch in my patented Strangled Python position (one hand in your pants scratching your balls/keeping it warm and one on the mouse), when I see "Monster Girls Quest Thread V1". Piqued my curiosity of course, so I entered and sure enough found exactly what I expected, even exceeding expectation for the disturbing part. Fucking suddenly I hear "Hey are you eating at..." and the door being quite slowly opened. Press the close icon on the browser at the speed of light, but no the fucker is frozen (I know it's Flash that is freezing it sometimes, but I hardly had time to CTRLALTDEL and shut down the process), with something that must have sounded like a "HUARUUGHHGG" I pretty much jumped into the desk to press the power button on the monitor (I was pretty much lying down sideways relative to the monitor, wasn't easy to reach the button that quickly). "What? Oh I was stretching, gotta get up from this chair" and so I went off to do something else, to cover up for me having shut off the monitor (no-one noticed the computer being still on). Embarrassing? No because they didn't catch me, but had they seen me with a hand on my dick and some of the shit in that thread on the screen, I'd have jumped in front of a train. [editline]25th September 2012[/editline] [QUOTE=Sleepy Head;37796303]i'm not gonna lie, I would sometimes take a break from a fap to look at mindless videos on youtube [editline]25th September 2012[/editline] with dick out and everything[/QUOTE] Yeah nothing like watching Hitler do the Gangnam style with your dick in your hand.

[QUOTE=acds;37799350]Be happy it was just men, and not something worse. Happened to me a while ago: Browsing Facepunch in my patented Strangled Python position (one hand in your pants scratching your balls/keeping it warm and one on the mouse), when I see "Monster Girls Quest Thread V1". Piqued my curiosity of course, so I entered and sure enough found exactly what I expected, even exceeding expectation for the disturbing part. Fucking suddenly I hear "Hey are you eating at..." and the door being quite slowly opened. Press the close icon on the browser at the speed of light, but no the fucker is frozen (I know it's Flash that is freezing it sometimes, but I hardly had time to CTRLALTDEL and shut down the process), with something that must have sounded like a "HUARUUGHHGG" I pretty much jumped into the desk to press the power button on the monitor (I was pretty much lying down sideways relative to the monitor, wasn't easy to reach the button that quickly). "What? Oh I was stretching, gotta get up from this chair" and so I went off to do something else, to cover up for me having shut off the monitor (no-one noticed the computer being still on). Embarrassing? No because they didn't catch me, but had they seen me with a hand on my dick and some of the shit in that thread on the screen, I'd have jumped in front of a train.[/QUOTE] Reminds me of the time that my dad found my sea of questionable material in my firefox downloads folder. I had left all of my shit there because I didn't feel like moving it to my real porn folder ("Shameful Things" on my desktop :v:) and my dad had to use my computer. When I came back to use my computer, my downloads folder was minimized. When I opened it up, there was a blank spot in the middle of a metric fuckload of thumbnails. He never said anything about it, but later that week I found his porn stash so I guess we're even now. [editline]25th September 2012[/editline] I re-read my post and it sounds like I'm implying my dad took some of my shit, but he actually didn't. He had to download something on my computer and put it on a flash drive to do something with his computer.

so I'm riding my bike really fast down a hill, and just around the corner was a family moving in. they needed a big fickin.g trailer that covered the sidewalk. so I'm blazing down the side walk and I didn't see the trailer coming since I was looking back at my buddy. the fucking trailer clotheslines me at 50 kmh while my bike keeps going full speed. underneath it, and down the street. broken nose and lost 2 baby teeth. I was 6

Didn't do my maths homework so during break time I stayed in class copying my friends work while eating a granola bar and drinking tea (eating and drinking is not allowed in class for "hygenic" reasons) suddenly my maths teacher walks in, stares at me and I stare back at her eating the bar slowly like an advertisement. She gave me a very big "busted" smile.

[QUOTE=haloguy234;37798122]Stopping mid-fap doesn't make you gay. Are you 12 or something? There have been times where I've actually fallen asleep during a fap.[/QUOTE] Falling alseep while fapping clearly makes you gay. My parents found me once, holding my dick with pants down, asleep. They now think I'm gay.