Embarrassing Situations Thread V1.0 - Oh, the shame!

[Kotov]

[QUOTE=titopei;38002715]Sometimes I forget and I shake my leg and bam, everyone looks at me for farting but when I try and remake the sound it doesn't work.[/QUOTE]

This, a thousand times this.

[Meatpuppet]

[QUOTE=titopei;38002715]I like to shake my leg a lot when I'm sitting in class but my new shoes + the school floors make a farting sound sometimes whenever I do it. Sometimes I forget and I shake my leg and bam, everyone looks at me for farting but when I try and remake the sound it doesn't work.[/QUOTE]

I think its funny how you make up this ping excuse just to hide that you have a severe carting
Progress

[PollytheParrot]

Most awkward thing ever for me is dozing off during something (like a lecture), then ABRUPTLY shaking awake like some epileptic in the most bizarre and sudden manner ever. It's impossible to play it off too. The remainder of whatever's going I'm horribly embarrassed and I start getting all sweaty.

[suttles]

In gym right, in these gym shorts yo.

This hot ass girl walks up to me, starts talking, then notices her shoe is untied.
She bends over, and I obviously get turned in.
The fucking coach wanted me briefly, and I got up. I didn't notice but my fucking dick pulled up my pants leg and was slightly poking out.

Lovely.

[Brochacho]

[QUOTE=Suttles;38004028]In gym right, in these gym shorts yo.

This hot ass girl walks up to me, starts talking, then notices her shoe is untied.
She bends over, and I obviously get turned in.
The fucking coach wanted me briefly, and I got up. I didn't notice but my fucking dick pulled up my pants leg and was slightly poking out.

Lovely.[/QUOTE]

Why do you people always SOMEHOW manage to get your dick to escape the gym shorts
Maybe take underwear to gym too

[Muff Pi]

I had to shimmy between a table and a wall one time, after being treated to a rather nice physics demonstration provided by the veeeeeeeeeeeeery well endowed girl I had been talking to, cock was at table level and I didn't realize until about halfway down the length of the table. Stopped wearing loose boxers after that.

[suttles]

[QUOTE=Nemisis116;38004156]Why do you people always SOMEHOW manage to get your dick to escape the gym shorts
Maybe take underwear to gym too[/QUOTE]

my underwear is loose

i fucking hate having underwear stick

[Brochacho]

-snip it actually posted-

[titopei]

[QUOTE=Meatpuppet;38003492]I think its funny how you make up this ping excuse just to hide that you have a severe carting
Progress[/QUOTE]

Still typing on your phone i see

[cwook]

[QUOTE=Suttles;38004292]my underwear is loose

i fucking hate having underwear stick[/QUOTE]

Compression shorts, man

[a dumb bear]

[QUOTE=Suttles;38004292]my underwear is loose

i fucking hate having underwear stick[/QUOTE]

Always plan ahead, I never wear loose boxers if I have PE on that day.

[ultra_bright]

I was taking a dump at school today and then the fire alarm went off.
fuck.

[HeavyGuy]

ultra_bright just reminded me of one from Year 3, a good like 9 years ago.

Was sat in the classroom doing some stupid shit for the lesson probably colouring something I had drawn in, can't remember what I was doing but what I remember distinctly is farting pretty loud, and then everyone hearing it. Literally seconds after, the fire alarm went off.

Took about a week for the one to get lived down.

[Brochacho]

[QUOTE=HeavyGuy;38014313]ultra_bright just reminded me of one from Year 3, a good like 9 years ago.

Was sat in the classroom doing some stupid shit for the lesson probably colouring something I had drawn in, can't remember what I was doing but what I remember distinctly is farting pretty loud, and then everyone hearing it. Literally seconds after, the fire alarm went off.

Took about a week for the one to get lived down.[/QUOTE]

That should be your title
'set off fire alarm by farting'

[suttles]

I was in the theatre at school where we wait for like 30 minutes before class starts. Some guy sits next to me(I'm listening to music since it's fine, everyone does it) and starts watching how my mp3 player works. I don't like to be racist or sterotypical(Not saying his race as I don't wish to start shit) so I explained random stuff about it. He showed great interest, but I was dumb and let him see where I put it(my backpack, it's been there all year and nothing ever happened). As the bell rung, I put it up and he saw. I was standing in line to go out of the door and felt a sudden thrust in my bag, I turned around and he was running. Sigh.

I asked the school to help me possibly, and this bitchy girl was like "OH YOU CANT HAVE THAT SCHOOl, IT'S FINE THAT HE STOLE IT"

Sighhhhhhhhhhh

I really should have put it in my pocket, but I REALLY like to the think the best of situations. It's been a huge weakness for years. It was the day of the pep rally and a huge football game as well, I had no school spirit at all that day.

[HeavyGuy]

[QUOTE=Nemisis116;38018557]That should be your title
'set off fire alarm by farting'[/QUOTE]

This would be incredible :v:

[Kirbyfactor]

[QUOTE=Suttles;38019452]I was in the theatre at school where we wait for like 30 minutes before class starts. Some guy sits next to me(I'm listening to music since it's fine, everyone does it) and starts watching how my mp3 player works. I don't like to be racist or sterotypical(Not saying his race as I don't wish to start shit) so I explained random stuff about it. He showed great interest, but I was dumb and let him see where I put it(my backpack, it's been there all year and nothing ever happened). As the bell rung, I put it up and he saw. I was standing in line to go out of the door and felt a sudden thrust in my bag, I turned around and he was running. Sigh.

I asked the school to help me possibly, and this bitchy girl was like "OH YOU CANT HAVE THAT SCHOOl, IT'S FINE THAT HE STOLE IT"

Sighhhhhhhhhhh

I really should have put it in my pocket, but I REALLY like to the think the best of situations. It's been a huge weakness for years. It was the day of the pep rally and a huge football game as well, I had no school spirit at all that day.[/QUOTE]

How expensive was your mp3?

[Bletotum]

what sort of shitty school is that

are they not obligated to assist in cases of theft? rules on what is allowed on premises are irrelevant

[editline]13th October 2012[/editline]

someone stole a classmate's phone last april or may

it was in a jacket on a table. i was the only person in the room, and was writing problems on the whiteboard, when someone walked in, took the jacket, and left; i had assumed that it was one of my classmates who had entered the room (class of six)

the phone had a tracking thingy, but the school was really shitty at assisting a search; it was unfound in the general area that the tracker said it was in (locker room)

one week later it was in mexico

[ewitwins]

I would've beaten the living shit out of him after breaking his arm. I'm so glad I'm not in high school, because if someone tries to steal from you in college, you beat the living hell out of them and it's justified! I had a friend where someone tried to steal their bike in broad daylight, he just kicked them in the nuts and three people around him proceeded to beat the living hell out of the guy.

Bike thieves are not treated kindly here.

[suttles]

[QUOTE=Kirbyfactor;38020827]How expensive was your mp3?[/QUOTE]

100$ or so, got it for my last birthday

[Boss]

[QUOTE=Suttles;38023351]100$ or so, got it for my last birthday[/QUOTE]

Was this less than 6 months ago?

If so, go and beat the living shit out of him.

Actually beat all tendencies out of him to steal, imagine you are performing an exorcism and the spirit / devil is the urge to steal. You want to beat the guy near to death to get rid of this urge / devil.

Na just kidding just put him on the deck and ask him if he remember your mp3 player if he starts complaining and shit just say you do and give him the 1 boot. (1 boot remember, its generally frowned upon to kick someone when they are down)

If hes bigger than you just take him by surprise.

As you can probably tell thieves piss me off.

[Mallet Gallet]

[QUOTE=Boss;38023697]Was this less than 6 months ago?

If so, go and beat the living shit out of him.

Actually beat all tendencies out of him to steal, imagine you are performing an exorcism and the spirit / devil is the urge to steal. You want to beat the guy near to death to get rid of this urge / devil.

Na just kidding just put him on the deck and ask him if he remember your mp3 player if he starts complaining and shit just say you do and give him the 1 boot. (1 boot remember, its generally frowned upon to kick someone when they are down)

If hes bigger than you just take him by surprise.

As you can probably tell thieves piss me off.[/QUOTE]

No, fighting him isn't the answer.

Murder is.

[editline]13th October 2012[/editline]

Anyways, during my sophomore year in high school we were playing baseball for the month in PE. My group was up to bat, and we had to line up while waiting for our turn. I was behind this one girl I was attempting to get with. It was early spring, and it was still pretty cold outside. I was a dumbass and wore a t-shirt and shorts on the coldest day of the month, so there was extreme shrinkage going on in my region. The girl in front of me turned really fast, her arm swung towards me, and somehow she grabbed my package. She got all wide eyed, and I froze up and yelled something along the lines of "IT'S COLD OUTSIDE". We never talked again after that.

[suttles]

[QUOTE=Boss;38023697]Was this less than 6 months ago?

If so, go and beat the living shit out of him.

Actually beat all tendencies out of him to steal, imagine you are performing an exorcism and the spirit / devil is the urge to steal. You want to beat the guy near to death to get rid of this urge / devil.

Na just kidding just put him on the deck and ask him if he remember your mp3 player if he starts complaining and shit just say you do and give him the 1 boot. (1 boot remember, its generally frowned upon to kick someone when they are down)

If hes bigger than you just take him by surprise.

As you can probably tell thieves piss me off.[/QUOTE]
alright

ty for da help

Sadly I was half asleep and can't remember his face. I'll just go beat up every person who has a similar looking body

[QUOTE=Bletotum;38022202]what sort of shitty school is that

are they not obligated to assist in cases of theft? rules on what is allowed on premises are irrelevant

[editline]13th October 2012[/editline]

someone stole a classmate's phone last april or may

it was in a jacket on a table. i was the only person in the room, and was writing problems on the whiteboard, when someone walked in, took the jacket, and left; i had assumed that it was one of my classmates who had entered the room (class of six)

the phone had a tracking thingy, but the school was really shitty at assisting a search; it was unfound in the general area that the tracker said it was in (locker room)

one week later it was in mexico[/QUOTE]

i didnt even ask for them to help me track the guy

i said "if i could just see the security camera RIGHT next to where he stole it, that's fine. I can find him ". Fucking hate my school.

[suttles]

9:21 AM - Suttles: man
9:21 AM - Suttles: i had a weird dream
9:21 AM - Suttles: i was arrested for running away from cops on a bike
9:21 AM - Suttles: the person who arrested me was a gray kitten
9:21 AM - Suttles: i talked to the cat
9:22 AM - Suttles: who went by "ghost cat" because he could talk 2 humans
9:22 AM - Suttles: and i said
9:22 AM - Suttles: hey
9:22 AM - Suttles: im ghost man
9:22 AM - Suttles: i can talk 2 animals
9:22 AM - Suttles: and there was a tiny snail who was arrested
9:22 AM - Suttles: i said "HEY WHATD HE GET ARRESTED FOR"
9:22 AM - Suttles: My little brother walks up and reads the paper(He is 8)
9:22 AM - Suttles: in a
9:22 AM - Suttles: really
9:22 AM - Suttles: really
9:22 AM - Suttles: deep voice
9:22 AM - Suttles: and says
9:23 AM - Suttles: "SCOOBY DOO BITCH"
9:23 AM - Suttles: then i woke up
9:23 AM - Suttles: what the fuck did i smoke last night
9:23 AM - healthy adolescent sex drive: that is a weird dream
9:23 AM - Suttles: even worse
9:23 AM - Suttles: i woke up
9:23 AM - Suttles: and yelled
9:23 AM - Suttles: SCOOBY DOO BITCH
9:23 AM - Suttles: and woke my dad and mom up
9:24 AM - Suttles: rip

too lazy to write it in paragraph form, i just woke up

[SHOE3045]

Yesterday in the second heat of the skate contest I was in I gave the signal that I was ready for my run without thinking about it, went on to land zero tricks and ended the run by pantomiming shooting myself in the head.

[Chaotic Lord]

[QUOTE=SHOE3045;38033324]Yesterday in the second heat of the skate contest I was in I gave the signal that I was ready for my run without thinking about it, went on to land zero tricks and ended the run by pantomiming shooting myself in the head.[/QUOTE]

10/10

[Kotov]

-snip wrong thread-

[cwook]

[t]http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-irwK_EGj4k4/TlPV3swFJNI/AAAAAAAABs8/R6bCjgAiRQQ/s1600/San%2BPellegrino%2B500ml.jpg[/t]

The other night I was at a party, and some guy comes up to me and my friend and says, "you guys want some pellegrino?" Now my friend and I were DDs, and my friend was thirsty. I was a suspicious that someone would have pellegrino at a party, but my friend isn't the sharpest tool in the shed. He took a drink and said, "this isn't pellegrino..." Turns out it was vodka.

[CordlessElm]

[QUOTE=Noi;36835575]We need more gay stories.[/QUOTE]

Back when I was in middle school, I would sway my arms back and forth. It just so happened that I was in Physical Education and we were all in our uniforms. (Our P.E. uniforms consisted of T-shirts and [URL="http://uniformsbyplanett.com/images/PEshort[1].JPG"]gym shorts[/URL]) I was still swaying my arms and some kid was right behind my right arm then my hand that was being swayed back had accidentally touched his dick.

[HazzaHardie]

yesterday I was turning on my computer and as I was doing it my mum walked into my room, took one look at my screen and walked out. This is my desktop
[t]http://puu.sh/1eVuV[/t]