Embarrassing Situations Thread V1.0 - Oh, the shame! - General

[QUOTE=znk666;36796415]Not being able to understand what a person is saying although you have asked the person to repeat it twice.[/QUOTE] Holy shit yes. I started talking english to a store assistant in norway after 3 tries cause my norwegian is bad average and she was mumbling her ass off, fuck me that's embarassing, especially if your friend next to you then proceeds to ask you why she's talking in english.

Ok well its not really embarrassing for me but w/e There's me, my friend and a girl my friend had a crush on, however my friend was a damn tease and knew that she gave me boners. However he did not know I had a belt on that day. So my friend being the massive asshat he is [I]tries[/I] to be cool. "Hey beth I want to show you a cool trick" (she's been trying to figure out that fancy card shuffling shit) My friend says "Yeah beth a really big one" while he reaches for my pants and tries to pull them down [I]from my front[/I] and of course he notices my belt while hes on his knees. Seizing this opportunity I did what had to be done with a good ol' pelvic thrust I came out a champ, my friend had no problem learning a lesson and Beth thinks my friend is gay, as well as nearly busting a side from laughing.

This year, on 4/20/2012 my class had a practice AP exam first block, it was one of the released old test state exams, and we had to do it. I was 2 bowls of hash and 3 blunts deep, and it was my first block, so needless to say i was going to do bad or fail the test. I ended up googling one problem, and the whole answer key came up, so being the high genius i was, i copied every answer except 2 down, and ended up getting the HIGHEST GRADE MY TEACHER HAS SEEN IN 14 YEARS. The curve had me at a 120/130, and i was at a 99 regularly. He made me go in front of the class, with only the questions, and tell the class every right answer. I got to question 33 before he stopped me, and i only got 2 wrong so he gave me a 94 and told me not to cheat anymore hahahah ap english sucks dick

[QUOTE=Whomobile;36854908]I fainted half-way though a science class about blood.[/QUOTE] i know that feel bro i used to get light headed and hyperventilate from a phobia of needles, just hearing about anything related to shots/blood tests would trigger a reaction [editline]20th July 2012[/editline] when i was in 8th grade i had a crazy algebra teacher who collected monkeys and wind-up toys. one day i fell asleep on my desk, and woke up to my class all shouting "[guy mannly], wake up!" when i opened my eyes, i was staring into a giant wall of wind-up toys that had been constructed around my head. teacher kept me after class to discuss my diurnal sleep schedule

Halfway through a maths class. Shit, hell... I was thinking, I fucking hate maths so much I literally paid no attention to it, to myself it was just a doss subject... I'm dyslexic and I have an obscene hate for numbers. My teacher, a nice guy normally, if you made him click he'd just go fucking beserk. "Sir, I'm not sure what to do on this question" He glared at me for a moment, shuffling over me like he had a pipe-wrench up his arse, like it was a chore or something. I point to the question, "What exactly do I do here?" pointing to the specific part. He just stares into my eyes for a moment, I saw it building up, I was pissing him off "We've been over this three times this lesson, a demonstration, we then had you all try it... then help, and you've just asked for help now?" I start bricking it, shaking and stuttering with each word "Yes, I know... but I don't know what to do" He stands up and goes apeshit, I'm not even joking... every swearword I know is from this guy and this very few moments of pure terror, I think I actually followed through a little - the whole class is just staring at me like I'm some kind of idiot. I hate maths, I hate numbers... I am physically and mentally afraid of both.

[QUOTE=Guy Mannly;36862313]i know that feel bro i used to get light headed and hyperventilate from a phobia of needles, just hearing about anything related to shots/blood tests would trigger a reaction[/QUOTE] I used to be afraid of needles, if you ever give blood just watch them put the needle in and that fear will dissolve

[QUOTE=a dumb bear;36842159]When I was 10 I thought "jizz" meant "poop" My sister had to correct me. It wasn't a very good moment.[/QUOTE] [I]I gotta go take a wicked jizz![/I]

[QUOTE=Bitz62x;36863500]Halfway through a maths class. Shit, hell... I was thinking, I fucking hate maths so much I literally paid no attention to it, to myself it was just a doss subject... I'm dyslexic and I have an obscene hate for numbers. My teacher, a nice guy normally, if you made him click he'd just go fucking beserk. "Sir, I'm not sure what to do on this question" He glared at me for a moment, shuffling over me like he had a pipe-wrench up his arse, like it was a chore or something. I point to the question, "What exactly do I do here?" pointing to the specific part. He just stares into my eyes for a moment, I saw it building up, I was pissing him off "We've been over this three times this lesson, a demonstration, we then had you all try it... then help, and you've just asked for help now?" I start bricking it, shaking and stuttering with each word "Yes, I know... but I don't know what to do" He stands up and goes apeshit, I'm not even joking... every swearword I know is from this guy and this very few moments of pure terror, I think I actually followed through a little - the whole class is just staring at me like I'm some kind of idiot. I hate maths, I hate numbers... I am physically and mentally afraid of both.[/QUOTE] it absolutely sickens me that teachers like this exist. like bf skinner said, "we shouldn't teach great books, we should teach a love of reading". the biggest goal of primary and secondary education is always said to be to prepare students for college, but it's counterproductive if the teachers cause their students to hate learning. [editline]20th July 2012[/editline] [QUOTE=cccritical;36863622]I used to be afraid of needles, if you ever give blood just watch them put the needle in and that fear will dissolve[/QUOTE] i had to get shots/blood tests a few times within a span of several months recently so i started to get over it a bit. it's a lot easier when i just look away though - the pain itself isn't too bad and i'm usually left wondering why i was so terrified to begin with. i don't take well to viewing any sort of injury being inflicted on someone and i think most of what terrifies me is just seeing a sharp object penetrate the skin.

This is going to be a short one. I liked to pretty decent girls at the time and one, lets call her Sydney, was very prude. The other one was down right nasty, lets call her Alexis. WWWeellll i was textting them both late at night. My phone at the time was pretty much the worst piece of shit. I was texting nasty stuff to Alexis, while i was texting Sydney just your average borign shit like "how are you?" "What's up?". Well i was sending one of the most dirtiest, nastiest, most vulgar texts to who i though was Alexis. It was long and very descriptive. Did mention nasty? Well it turns out that i sent it to the prude goody Ms. two shoes Sydney.... Let's just say Sydney hasn't looked at me the same, and i hooked up with Alexis.

[QUOTE=Guy Mannly;36863821]it absolutely sickens me that teachers like this exist. like bf skinner said, "we shouldn't teach great books, we should teach a love of reading". the biggest goal of primary and secondary education is always said to be to prepare students for college, but it's counterproductive if the teachers cause their students to hate learning. [/QUOTE] Psh, I know. I enjoyed most of everything else - I always had dick teachers for maths, no matter what... hell, I'm dyslexic! my best subject was English, referencing to which I had difficulty in... and passed with a B*. [editline]20th July 2012[/editline] Best teacher in the world, she was awesome... in the summer, I had forgotten some coursework... I was going to fail if I didn't do it, she called me into school and helped me get it all done in one day, in the summer holidays, with munchies... and tea, need more teachers like this.

[QUOTE=worth.while;36863979]This is going to be a short one. I liked to pretty decent girls at the time and one, lets call her Sydney, was very prude. The other one was down right nasty, lets call her Alexis. WWWeellll i was textting them both late at night. My phone at the time was pretty much the worst piece of shit. I was texting nasty stuff to Alexis, while i was texting Sydney just your average borign shit like "how are you?" "What's up?". Well i was sending one of the most dirtiest, nastiest, most vulgar texts to who i though was Alexis. It was long and very descriptive. Did mention nasty? Well it turns out that i sent it to the prude goody Ms. two shoes Sydney.... Let's just say Sydney hasn't looked at me the same, and i hooked up with Alexis.[/QUOTE] I know both a Sydney and an Alexis :v:

In fifth grade I walked into the bathroom and saw two kids in my grade climbing on top of the urinals and then climbing over the stall walls. I really wanted to join them because I thought they were the "cool" kids. But my weak little 5th grade body couldn't climb from the top of the urinals and then over the stall walls. So I thought to myself, I'm gonna practice everyday. So the next day I go to the bathroom and do my bathroom gymnastics and one of the 5th grade teachers walks in only to witness me on top of that metal piping above a urinal, struggling to reach the first stall's wall. I only got a warning, no trouble.

That must have made the story more interesting :downs: [editline]20th July 2012[/editline] that must have made the story more interesting ;)[QUOTE=KommradKommisar;36864156]I know both a Sydney and an Alexis :v:[/QUOTE]

[QUOTE=cccritical;36863622]I used to be afraid of needles, if you ever give blood just watch them put the needle in and that fear will dissolve[/QUOTE] I tried doing that once, couldn't. I couldn't even look at the needle. The process itself wasn't that bad but I'm still scared of big syringes.

Oh boy, there's too many to type here in one sitting for me. First one that comes to mind happened during my sister's wedding dinner rehearsal (let's call her Linda). Everyone had to go around and say how they were related/acquainted to couple, as well as some advice for the newly weds. Everything's running along towards me, while I spend the time thinking about something funny to say, but not too fucking corny. However, all of that was for naught, for when it came to me I boldly stated in front of mine and the groom's entire family, "Hi, I'm Linda's sister and..." and people started cracking up already. I was so confused, I didn't realize what I had said, I hadn't even gotten to the advice yet! It took a whole five seconds before it dawned on me: no, I am NOT her sister. I have a dick. I am, therefore, her BROTHER. I've made the same mistake (calling myself my sisters' sister) a couple of times after that, too, and every time that story gets brought up. Another time, I think this was like 6th grade or something, I was on vacation in the Caribbean, and we stopped in Mexico to visit some Aztec ruins. On the bus ride there, the tour guide starts asking questions, and one of the questions he asks is, "What are some of the things that the Aztecs are known for?" I, being slightly hard of hearing not helped by the fact that we're in a fucking BUS, misheard the question as, "How have you heard about the Aztecs." I boldly raise my hand, and he calls on me, and I prouldly proclaim, "Age of Empires and from my Social Studies book!". That's right, folks, the Aztecs are known for developing Age of Empires AND for writing books on Social Studies. Everyone on the bus sort of awkwardly looked at me and the tour guide laughed it off and called on the next guy. I, however, still didn't get it and it took me a while before it dawned on me what the question he asked REALLY was. I was very quiet on the bus-ride back. [editline]21st July 2012[/editline] Another time, Freshman year during hall decorating day, the Sophomores decorated their hall with their class color: blue. Everything was blue, even the lights. But what they also did was fuck with the bathroom labels. They covered up the WO in WOMEN's bathroom with blue tape, and added WO to MEN for the men's bathroom. They even changed the little clothes on the stick figures depicting the gender so that, to a casual glance, it looked normal. So anyway, I heard that they had a disco ball set up in the bathroom that was in that hall, so I decide to check it out. I walk past the bogus signs, confident that I was heading into the Men's bathroom (completely ignoring the un-fucked with WOMEN'S sign right above the FUCKING DOOR ITSELF) and open up the door to the Women's bathroom. I only noticed my mistake when I saw a girl in their doing her hair look quite startled when she saw me open the door. I turn right the fuck around and hope that no one saw me, but NOPE. A few Sophomores got to witness a stupid Freshman mistake. Although, in my defense, I was used to going to the bathroom in a different hall, where the sides that the bathroom's are on are switched, so for me, I was just acting on instinct. [editline]21st July 2012[/editline] THERE WASN'T EVEN A FUCKING DISCO BALL IN THE MEN'S BATHROOM THERE ANYWAYS FFS [editline]21st July 2012[/editline] Oh also one that just happened to me today. You know how most garages have those little motion detectors underneath them so that they don't fucking close on your ass? Well, those are really annoying when you're trying to hit the garage-door-go-down button from the inside and run out. So what I did was hit the button, and run to the garage and try to pull a fucking ninja move and jump over the laser yet under the garage door (I've done it a few times before with no problems). Unfortunately for me, the concrete is REALLY smooth right near the garage door itself, and my shoes have long since lost all of their grip, so as I bring my legs up for the jump, I completely flop on the ground. My first though was "SHIT! THE DOOR IS GONNA CLOSE ON ME! GET AWAAAAAAAYYY!". But then I look up and see that I tripped the laser and it went back up. Thankfully, no one was around (at all) to see my lacking ninja skill. So I walk the fuck back in, close the garage, and walk out the door right next to it like a normal person. My left hand still hurts like a bitch while typing this as it had to bear the brunt of the fall, SO THAT'S FUN. I guess I got lucky with this one, because this would be really fucking embarrassing if someone saw me do that. I'm sure it looked fucking hilarious.

Well there was that one time when I put my hand into some stranger's pocket thinking it was my dad's, that was fun

[QUOTE=Mastahamma;36868074]Well there was that one time when I put my hand into some stranger's pocket thinking it was my dad's, that was fun[/QUOTE] Do you often attempt to grope your father's testacles through his clothing?

coat pocket plus I was like 3 years old [editline]21st July 2012[/editline] but I do often try to get some feels, yeah

[QUOTE=Mastahamma;36868121]coat pocket plus I was like 3 years old [editline]21st July 2012[/editline] but I do often try to get some feels, yeah[/QUOTE] Don't worry. We all do it too. :quagmire:

that's why I said it so confidently. I thought it was completely acceptable

I'm very used to people being ignorant and unfriendly, and on very rare occasions I pass by very cheery people who say hello and smile at me. When that happens, they catch me off guard and I have to wake myself up to reply and say hello back so I don't look like some socially awkward retard.

[QUOTE=worth.while;36864748]That must have made the story more interesting :downs: [editline]20th July 2012[/editline] that must have made the story more interesting ;)[/QUOTE] Dont live in Nevada, do ya now?

Now this didn't happen to me, but I was involved. So, my school gave out free netbooks to every single student for "work". All we did was turn 'em on in recess ( or when we have an assignment that requires us to go look for stuff on the net ) and watch videos and funny shit. Homewer, this also sparked the whole "stop watching porn" thing that was a running gag ever since they gave us the computer. My friend, let's call him Brian, stops looking at the computer for a split second and one of my classmates types in penis and presses the "I'm feeling lucky" button. There's a massive picture of a massive penis, and he is like trying to laugh and close the netbook at the same time which caused him to fall backwards and lie there on the floor laughing. At that moment we all stopped giggling like children and picked him up, closed the tab, etc. When we were 12 and we were all in the middle of puberty, ( girls included ) Brian's Youtube related section leads him to porn of horses fucking. We spent every single recess saying "His dick is dead!" when it flopped around, "It's like a fuckin' stick!" and other shit like that until one of the girls brings up she would like to be fucked like that. We give her this weird, long stare before laughing like idiots. I doubt she was joking.

Massive erection in stretchy PE shorts, pretty much everyday.

In 4th grade when I was still learning my times tables, I was a little slower at learning than everyone else. So the teacher threw this big party for everyone who learned it because "Woo math". I still hadn't learned it completely so there I am sitting in a corner desk by myself crying, trying to force that shit into my head because everyone else was having pizza and fun and I wasn't. Even today I still don't know half my times tables, and I'm the worst at math.

[QUOTE=Hardpoint Nomad;36873041]In 4th grade when I was still learning my times tables, I was a little slower at learning than everyone else. So the teacher threw this big party for everyone who learned it because "Woo math". I still hadn't learned it completely so there I am sitting in a corner desk by myself crying, trying to force that shit into my head because everyone else was having pizza and fun and I wasn't. Even today I still don't know half my times tables, and I'm the worst at math.[/QUOTE] [url]http://www.khanacademy.org/[/url] Teach yourself.

[QUOTE=Bytecry;36873120][url]http://www.khanacademy.org/[/url] Teach yourself.[/QUOTE] the problem with khan academy is that nobody wants to do math in their spare time

There was this time I were having huge problems with flatulence. In the school's workshop I was welding in one of the stalls with the only girl in class watching me work. As I focused on the arc I felt large quantities of gas build up in my guts, it was awful. It was so bad the amount of gas made my back hurt as well as my stomach, due to all the pressure. After 5 minutes I let out a fart lasting for 4 seconds, and the smell was terrible. The day after I could hear the girl talking behind my back, telling the others how disgusting I am [img]http://sae.tweek.us/static/images/emoticons/frown.gif[/img]

Being allowed to have an ipod in class when we're doing work and it's really quiet, then the teacher calls me out because i don't realize how loud my music is, so then everyone watches me pull out my ipod and turn it down.

An embarrasing situation for me that I can quite clearly remember in my head was when I must have been like 11 or 12 in school, and our form tutor came in and we had this plus/minus point system for anything good or bad. So I think I had like 3 of these minus points and the form teacher was this michelin man of Wales with short black hair and a very out of place rugged ginger moustache. Anyway so I hand these in and he like just fucking goes insane and starts shouting at me, then he brings on the topic of my Science book which I hadn't done any work in, and he marches me to the back of the class where the lockers are, and I hand him my book and all I remember is him just screaming in my face while he's right next to me, it felt like I had been hit by a tsunami of spit and abuse and then I just remember pretty much being totally numb and sitting down back to my desk shaking, while the whole class is staring at me.