Embarrassing Situations Thread V1.0 - Oh, the shame! - General

[QUOTE=Badballer;38620773]5'4 and weighing at over 100 kg is quite overweight are you crazy lol[/QUOTE] The '111.4 or 6 kg' made me think the 111 was pounds. I don't know shit about the metric system except that I can't read it.

how could anyone weigh 6 kg how

[QUOTE=Sergeant STFU;38621012]how could anyone weigh 6 kg how[/QUOTE] [QUOTE=Lijitsu;38620956]I don't know shit about the metric system except that I can't read it.[/QUOTE]

Fucking 4 way intersections where it's a stop all ways. When are you supposed to cross? Should you stop as a pedestrian? What if someone on the other side wants to turn, but you are approaching them. Then you are locking them up for a long ass time that they could have turned. Oh and then you motion for a car to go ahead(as a pedestrian) and they motion back at you and then they do another sign and then they kinda start driving but you start walking so they stop and fuck.

6'2" 135 kg master race! :D

[QUOTE=WTF Nuke;38621913]Fucking 4 way intersections where it's a stop all ways. When are you supposed to cross? Should you stop as a pedestrian? What if someone on the other side wants to turn, but you are approaching them. Then you are locking them up for a long ass time that they could have turned. Oh and then you motion for a car to go ahead(as a pedestrian) and they motion back at you and then they do another sign and then they kinda start driving but you start walking so they stop and fuck.[/QUOTE] It's commonly accepted that the first person to arrive at the stop is the first person to go. And pedestrians have the right of way. And the wave wave-back wave thing is just the curse of humanity. That and trying to get around someone in a doorway when your movements are synchronized and you end up doing the tango

Some times in department stores someone will be walking towards me, so i merge left to go around them, and at the same time, they merge to their right, so we enter a feedback loop and basically start dancing with each other like we're playing basketball or something. [editline]27th November 2012[/editline] It's so awkward :v:

I was on the bus with my friend heading home from work. (I give tuiton, she works at the condo I give tuition in) The bus was quite packed on the first floor but on the second floor there were 8 free seats, 4 in front, this guy sitting alone in between the other 4. Of course there's a reason why the guy was being given so much free space as I found out Suddenly, 5 minutes into the ride, he shouted (in Chinese), "AIRPLANE" and continued to do so every 2 minutes, piping down only when we got to a bus-stop. My friend and I did my best to ignore him but then he suddenly leaned forward, putting his head between the two of us and turned to me and said "AIRPLANE" So I weighed my options, how best could I reply him? So I said, "I prefer trains." And then he suddenly stood up, extended his arms like he was an aeroplane, started running and went "choo choo, BITCH"

When in doubt, just maintain your heading and hope the other person gets out of your way. [editline]27th November 2012[/editline] saves me from awkward dances daily

[QUOTE=Konigstiger96;38622342]I was on the bus with my friend heading home from work. (I give tuiton, she works at the condo I give tuition in) The bus was quite packed on the first floor but on the second floor there were 8 free seats, 4 in front, this guy sitting alone in between the other 4. Of course there's a reason why the guy was being given so much free space as I found out Suddenly, 5 minutes into the ride, he shouted (in Chinese), "AIRPLANE" and continued to do so every 2 minutes, piping down only when we got to a bus-stop. My friend and I did my best to ignore him but then he suddenly leaned forward, putting his head between the two of us and turned to me and said "AIRPLANE" So I weighed my options, how best could I reply him? And then I said, "I prefer trains." And then he suddenly stood up, extended his arms like he was an aeroplane, started running and went "choo choo, BITCH"[/QUOTE] There are quite a few alcoholics that take the same bus as me, and way too many times they sit next to me. One of them first raged in extremely slurred voice at some teens for sitting on the "elderly seats", which they weren't, then she sat next to me and started talking about how she and her friends drank Lasol (glass cleaner) before entering the bus and how one night one of her friends got kicked out from a stairway of a highrise because he banged on apartment doors and shouted racial slurs. Every now and then she just stopped and stared at me for a while with angry look on her face. Similar stories and behavior continued and all I could do is go "M-hm. Okay. I see" awkwardly and hope she didn't have a knife with her or anything. One time a girl had to leave a bus because a lifestyle-drunk sat next to her and started groping her and shit. I stood up to help her but she got up herself, pushed the guy (with fierce power may I say) onto the bus floor and left. I just sat back down and went "Heh, ok." Generally, drunk alcoholics on a bus always cause awkward / embarrassing situations. It kind of ruins my day when I see one enter the bus, because I know something happens that messes my schedule.

Once my school was having a party for the people with good grades and stuff, and people brought things like Xboxes and other stuff like that. My friend brought a 3DS, two of them, and we played for quite a while. Soon he had to leave the room for a second, leaving me to play the 3DS with another friend. After a while he came back, but I was sitting in his seat. He started pulling on the seat and telling me to get up, and, for whatever reason, I started saying "I love you" repeatedly for about a minute, but little did I know, there was a teacher right behind us the whole time giving me a disapproving look. I didn't play anymore games after that.

[QUOTE=loopoo;38620042]This happened the other day. I've been having crazy-bad joint pain the last few days, so I went to my GP and she said I might have rheumatoid arthritis, or just a viral infection that is causing my joints to swell. She told me to give a blood sample and a stool sample. I head over to the lab, and this really hot girl is there, and she's the one that's going to be taking my blood sample. I'm 20, and she was around my age as well. I felt so awkward when she looked over my paper and said "So you gotta give a blood sample and stool sample, yeah?" And I had the biggest goofy smile on my face and just nodded my head. Blood sample goes great, no problems. Then she walks over to her desk and hands over a little white tub and a test tube full of pink liquid. She tells me to "Go in the white tub, and then in the test tube" and I - stupidly - thought I had to poop into the little test tube. So I said, rather incredulously "I have to go in the tub [I]and[/I] and the test tube?". She had the biggest smile ever and was clearly restraining herself from laughing. She said "You go in the white tub, and [I]scoop[/I] it into the test tube". I took the bag and felt like a huge dumbass. It was really embarrassing. Fast forward to the end of the day. I've done my poop sample. It's sitting in the tub and test tube, the shadow my shit casts clearly visible through the white tub in the BIO-HAZARD plastic bag it's in. I walk through the hospital, happily swinging my poop-bag on my way to the laboratory. I give a sigh of relief when I see the girl isn't there, and hand my sample over to the lab guy who's working there. He double checks everything is in order, then takes my down my name. Then, out of the back door, the girl comes out and sees me again, poop-sample nearby. I felt so awkward because you can clearly see the shadow of my shit when you look at the tub, sitting there all smug and stinky. She looks at me, then to the sample, then wanders out back again. The shame I felt, it was pretty terrible. If you guys ever have to give a stool sample, let someone else take it in for you. Or take it in a plastic bag. Or hide the shit shadow with tissue or something. It'll save you a lot of awkwardness![/QUOTE] did you fuck her?

[QUOTE=ThatCrazyGmanV2;38623778]did you fuck her?[/QUOTE] Nothing gets a woman more excited than poop samples

[QUOTE=Nemisis116;38624042]Nothing gets a woman more excited than poop samples[/QUOTE] I always bring one when I go clubbing. Bitches love a guy with a healthy colon.

Was working out in the gym, and met an old friend I hadn't seen in a while. I just had dinner so was taking it slow, but somehow I get into kinda of a race with this guy. So we are both rowing and bench pressing like crazy until we are really tired and goto the fountain to get a drink. At this point im not feeling to well and when its my turn to drink I just barf over the whole fountain. This guy doesn't even flinch he just goes on talking. The rest of the gym wasnt so ignorant and i got told to leave by the staff. [editline]28th November 2012[/editline] Oh this guy is pretty much the village idiot anyway. Shit he did: -Sprayed deodorant in his mouth for 10 seconds for a burger. -Snorted pencil shavings. -Smashed apples with his forehead in the cafeteria (got this one on tape) -Lubed up his head with durex play before trying to ram people with it.

[QUOTE=taipan;38624207]Shit he did: -Sprayed deodorant in his mouth for 10 seconds for a burger. -Snorted pencil shavings. -Smashed apples with his forehead in the cafeteria (got this one on tape) -Lubed up his head with durex play before trying to ram people with it.[/QUOTE] I'm going to need to see that video now.

[b]Such is life in russia story approaching[/b] Gather your tiny balls, this is one hell of a story in which I succesfully evaded the first mission of my mafia life. That was around a month ago. I have a few cool guys, my best bros, but we rarely see eachother. This time we all were quite tired because of our activities and we decided to make a drunkard party together. And it was done, one guy provided us with a shelter for the night and also two more cool guys! The plan was that we all gather in the apartament and then go to buy some drinks. We went to buy drinks and also meet the last guy that was late. So at first we arrived to the meeting place with that guy. I proceeded to buy some fast food from a small shop nearby. While eating my piece of crap food I casually observed two 30-40 years old guys in black clothes eating and speaking all rude and stuff. One of them was charging their phone. We met the other guy, bought some vodka and beers and stuff. I had to carry the bottle of vodka in the pocket of my jacket. Wasn't visible from outside, but I felt like I have a hidden handun and always had to keep my hand in my pocket. Now to the point. We were walking back when I heard [b]"Hey guys!"[/b] from behind. Right, two drunk guys in black leather jackets with tatoos, wearing some parts of russian military uniform. The ones I observed. Me and friends proceeded walking forward relaxed, not showing fear. Although it was clear - we had to make a decision. Try to get away avoiding contact or make contact? They didn't seem too hostile. The drunkards approached us. I responded to them and so did one of my friends. ALthough I kept a cold position and my friend showed full response. Skipping stuff. Soon we were forced to stand on a crossing (almost 00:00 already) and listen to a mother fucking speech of one of the drunkards. He was trying to teach us life. He was telling us about what to do in jail, what's important in life. He was promising to introduce us to a high russian criminal. Basically forced the guy who showed full response to write down his number. The speech was going on for almost a hour and a half. All the guys of mine didn't do anything in attempt to get away and I was constantly thinking "HOW DO WE GET AWAY". I tried doing Jensen style talk with the drunkard, disagreeing to his criminal attitude, but he just ignored everything. That day I learned a lot about russian criminal life. Was not that embarassing, but awkward as fuck.

-snip-

I once (for some strange, inexplicable reason) sang Snake Eater over the microphone in a Garry's Mod RP server. I kept my voice down since I was not alone in my house and didn't want to seem completely insane, and it ended up sounding terrible. The best part is [I]I got nothing from it.[/I] [video=youtube;iiqke6YXJn4]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iiqke6YXJn4&feature=plcp[/video] Skip to 4:05. I did sing in Team Fortress 2 once, though. I was paid in hats and scrap.

Walked into a class today, girl from last year just said 'hi' and then one of her friends was like 'isnt that the guy that had a crush on you last year?' They then laughed about me and my lazy eye.

[QUOTE=Kirbyfactor;38625981]Walked into a class today, girl from last year just said 'hi' and then one of her friends was like 'isnt that the guy that had a crush on you last year?' They then laughed about me and my lazy eye.[/QUOTE] Cunts.

[QUOTE=Hardpoint Nomad;38626476]Cunts.[/QUOTE] Shit happens, I've gotten used to it.

My dog ripped my jeans in the butt when I was playing with him before going to university. Needless to say... yeah, I've been walking through university all day with a huge hole in my the back of my pants...

[QUOTE=Behemoth_PT;38627500]My dog ripped my jeans in the butt when I was playing with him before going to university. Needless to say... yeah, I've been walking through university all day with a huge hole in my the back of my pants...[/QUOTE] That reminds me. A few years ago, I went to the national EMT registry downtown to volunteer as a patient - read: get paid to lay on a cold steel backboard for 6 hours. Everything's going fine, we finish all the testing and get everything cleaned up and packed away. When I get back into the car so my buddy can drive me home, I feel something on my ass. I lift myself up and reach back there to figure out what it was... and find out I've been wearing the only pair of pants I own with a hole in them. Directly in between the two back pockets. What I was feeling was the car's seat. I also happened to be wearing a short shirt that day, short enough that couldn't reach where the hole was. Also? I go commando. Ever since that day, I've made sure which pair of pants it is I'm about to put on.

[QUOTE=Fourm Shark;38628419]You are not in the wrong. Just remember that.[/QUOTE] I've heard stuff like this for 15 years, thanks though!

[QUOTE=Kirbyfactor;38625981]Walked into a class today, girl from last year just said 'hi' and then one of her friends was like 'isnt that the guy that had a crush on you last year?' They then laughed about me and my lazy eye.[/QUOTE] tell your eye to get to work

[QUOTE=Suttles;38628705]tell your eye to get to work[/QUOTE] Can't get him out of that fucking chair man.

[QUOTE=Kirbyfactor;38625981]Walked into a class today, girl from last year just said 'hi' and then one of her friends was like 'isnt that the guy that had a crush on you last year?' They then laughed about me and my lazy eye.[/QUOTE] i get made fun of for my lisp, and have my entire life. i know that feel

It was an embarrassing moment for me every time we had to do a big project in high school, especially if it involved a class presentation (Save for senior year of HS. I was really good at public speaking by then). I always did something to mess up badly. Once when I was in Spanish class, my teacher gave us an assignment where we had to take pictures around the city and then write sentences in Spanish describing the pictures. She wanted us to make it like a poster. I got confused about what we were doing because I wasn't paying much attention, then cut my poster into pieces and glued one picture to each piece. When I realized nobody else was doing that, I had to staple the pieces back together because there was no poster paper left. Then I forgot to write any sentences before the day we had to turn it in, so I wrote on it, "A picture is worth a thousand words. My pictures are worth ten thousand words, and therefore need no sentences." She was grading the posters in class, so I saw when she got to mine. She looked really unhappy. My friend and I just laughed it off. [editline]seogfins[/editline] Here's a shorter, more embarrassing one. I love telling stories, and I used to be one of those people who would move their arms around a lot as they're telling a story. While sitting, I fully extended my left arm, sweeped it to the side, and it touched something. I looked over to see my female math teacher's fat butt as she was bending over to help another student. I clenched my hand and embarrassed-upset laughed, "no no no no no no no". And no, she wasn't attractive. Also, I once did the same thing in a different class and my finger got in a girl's mouth.

In relation to the above; once I reached out to borrow a pencil from my friend and my teacher leaned over the table at the same time and I cupped her boob, and she's like a double D cup, there was a good three seconds of both of us trying to work out what just happened. It was a hot teacher however, so not really that embarrassing.