The Depression Chat - Symptoms, Assistance, Medicines and More.
2,595 replies, posted
[QUOTE=Str4fe;32786231]So im deep down in depression again, im self-destructive and i just want to end it all.
Nothing good has happened to me in years..[/QUOTE]
Please give us as many details about your situation as you can, we will try to help you as much as we can.
i failed in love once again, thats what launched this depression again.
I realized the best thing that happened in many years was this one time i went to a beach with a friend and lots of strangers.
When i told the said friend that, she said "what happened at the beach?" I replied "Nothing. Nothing ever happens to me, so really the smallest things are fucking huge to me". Thats something lots of people do every day or every weekend. But for me it was the best thing that hapoened to me in years.
I alsi realized i have never felt love, and that makes me even more depressed. i see people around me getting in and out of relationship, but i have never loved anyone.
I only have 1 friend i usually spend my freetime with, hes not really a good friend but he damn well is the only friend i got. I had a close to death situation a while ago with a train, and now i just want to get run over by a train.
tl;dr im lonely.
[QUOTE=Str4fe;32786827]i failed in love once again, thats what launched this depression again.
I realized the best thing that happened in many years was this one time i went to a beach with a friend and lots of strangers.
When i told the said friend that, she said "what happened at the beach?" I replied "Nothing. Nothing ever happens to me, so really the smallest things are fucking huge to me". Thats something lots of people do every day or every weekend. But for me it was the best thing that hapoened to me in years.
I alsi realized i have never felt love, and that makes me even more depressed. i see people around me getting in and out of relationship, but i have never loved anyone.
I only have 1 friend i usually spend my freetime with, hes not really a good friend but he damn well is the only friend i got. I had a close to death situation a while ago with a train, and now i just want to get run over by a train.
tl;dr im lonely.[/QUOTE]Though you see lots of people going in and out of relationships, I'm sure 80% of those aren't real love at all. Relationships aren't all good, either, even if they're with someone you love.
now i cry a lot and i feel hopeless and i dont feel there is a reason for me to live.
There is absolutely NO content in my life.
sorry for all the typos, im on my phone.
[editline]15th October 2011[/editline]
yeah but i have never felt love and i really really want to love someone, its killing me. i want to see what its like..
[editline]15th October 2011[/editline]
now i just want to end it all because there is no content, and i cant find content to my life no matter how hard i try. People do not respect me and im terrible at making friends.
[QUOTE=Str4fe;32786867]now i cry a lot and i feel hopeless and i dont feel there is a reason for me to live.
There is absolutely NO content in my life.
sorry for all the typos, im on my phone.
[editline]15th October 2011[/editline]
yeah but i have never felt love and i really really want to love someone, its killing me. i want to see what its like..
[editline]15th October 2011[/editline]
now i just want to end it all because there is no content, and i cant find content to my life no matter how hard i try. People do not respect me and im terrible at making friends.[/QUOTE]
If you are interested in experiencing true love, then doing it through a relationship is far from being the only way of experiencing it.
You could experience love by finding a passion and focusing on it. You could experience love through a deeper study of yourself, practicing various things such as meditation. You could experience love through simply experiencing those little moments that you enjoy so much, such as going to the beach and simply relaxing there.
And lastly, you could simply change your perspective on love itself and realize that quite often love itself is often misunderstood for infatuation combined with a number of instincts.
There are probably people in this world who do not get to experience as much as a simple positive emotion. The understanding and the definition of true love is extremely debatable and broad.
Loneliness on other hand is far better defined, and loneliness can curiously enough be solved through the same routes which one could venture upon to search for love.
I ultimately think that you might partially be focusing on the bad sides of your situation way too much. If anything, loneliness can often be a fantastic opportunity for self involvement or self evolution.
Once you stop viewing loneliness as something supposedly wrong when compared to being an "active member" of a community/group of people, you suddenly realize that you are really not in a bad situation.
Right at the very moment I am not regularly visiting any real life friends whatsoever, I spend most of my time sitting at home and working on various areas which interest me. And while I do have a quantity of online friends, I ultimately dedicate very little to my social side, and for the most part I am quite content right now.
You appear to be too focused on finding content in structures of a relatively artificial nature, rather then finding content in something which could hold a much greater promise of bringing it.
I've felt really depressed lately... I feel like life doesn't matter and isn't worth living because in the end I am going to die anyway and everything I did will not matter. I've been thinking a lot about suicide. This feels like a re-occurring thing to me because this happened to me almost two years ago and two years before that and a year before that.Today I had a good day seeing my girlfriend and now I just feel like shit. I feel really sad right now and I have a feeling of anxiety. Sometimes I even feel disconnected from reality.
I'm also taking some antidepressants I was prescribed a few months ago for swelling to see if that would help me...
[QUOTE=seano12;32787555]I've felt really depressed lately... I feel like life doesn't matter and isn't worth living because in the end I am going to die anyway and everything I did will not matter. I've been thinking a lot about suicide. This feels like a re-occurring thing to me because this happened to me almost two years ago and two years before that and a year before that.Today I had a good day seeing my girlfriend and now I just feel like shit. I feel really sad right now and I have a feeling of anxiety. Sometimes I even feel disconnected from reality.
I'm also taking some antidepressants I was prescribed a few months ago for swelling to see if that would help me...[/QUOTE]
Your existence fully matters. Nothing is more important then your own life. Eventual physical death of the body is ultimately unavoidable, it is nothing but a biological fault, imagine if our lives were carried by eternal endlessly self renewing biological bodies.
You are ultimately correct, humans do not have a pre-existing intellectual purpose, only a pre-existing biological one, as a result we often wonder what is the intellectual meaning in all of this, while we were not given one to begin with. THAT IS WHY IT IS UP TO ANY HUMAN'S TASK TO CREATE HIS/HER OWN INTELLECTUAL PURPOSE! It is your task to shape the universe around you in a way which you prefer, because the universe did not give you any specific directions before bringing you into itself as a sentient being.
You have an amazing mission which you should be following right now, a mission of creating and following your own destiny. Do not even consider ending your life, because it is not impossible that this mission can only be followed during your biological lifetime (if we were to talk about the possibility of afterlife.)
The past day or so I've been feeling incredibly restless yet again. Was awake and hyper for the past 30 hours before deciding to try and sleep, only managed to get 3-4 hours of sleep and I feel wired again. In a few days or so I'll relax but I'll just simply lapse back into either my depressive or normal mood, or more often the case just feel both depressed and hyper at the same time which usually makes me feel like I really do not want to exist anymore. I just keep switching back and forth between both of these moods more often than not. I didn't think it was that bad many years ago when there was only a longer delay between each mood, but it's slowly been accelerating to the point where this just keeps cycling in a matter of a few days now. This has always completely fucked up my sleep schedule since day 1 and has most of the time ruined plans when I have something I need to do the next day or so.
My family aren't able to understand me and what I say, while my parents are prepared to jump to a completely unrelated excuse for it.
What the fuck is even going on now.
Genkaz, I want to have someone by my side, someone to talk to, someone to kiss and make me feel important, someone to care about and be cared about. I dont want to fall in love with literature or drawing or jogging at night. Im just sick of being alone, being disrespected and awkward all the time.
Thats all i want really. I want to love a human being. even for a short time. Thats all im asking from my life.
[QUOTE=Str4fe;32792322]Genkaz, I want to have someone by my side, someonw to talk to, someone to kiss and make me feel important, someone to care about and be cared about. I dont want to fall in love with literature or drawing or jogging at night. Im just sick of being alone, being disrespected and awkward all the time.
Thats all i want really. I want to love a human being. even for a shirt time. Thats all im asking from my life.[/QUOTE]
Is your spelling usually this bad?
[editline]15th October 2011[/editline]
[QUOTE=seano12;32787555]I've felt really depressed lately... I feel like life doesn't matter and isn't worth living because in the end I am going to die anyway and everything I did will not matter. I've been thinking a lot about suicide. This feels like a re-occurring thing to me because this happened to me almost two years ago and two years before that and a year before that.Today I had a good day seeing my girlfriend and now I just feel like shit. I feel really sad right now and I have a feeling of anxiety. Sometimes I even feel disconnected from reality.
I'm also taking some antidepressants I was prescribed a few months ago for swelling to see if that would help me...[/QUOTE]
Why would you want to kill yourself if you have a girlfriend? You should consider yourself lucky you have someone who cares about you, if you ever have suicidal thoughts you should discuss it with her and get her opinion. That may help.
I'm depressed because I'm just alone :(
[QUOTE=ultra_bright;32797632]Is your spelling usually this bad?
[/QUOTE]
Really bad time to be a grammar nazi, if anything it would be a good idea to avoid any unnecessary criticism in this thread, given the state of many members.
[QUOTE=genkaz92;32797911]Really bad time to be a grammar nazi, if anything it would be a good idea to avoid any unnecessary criticism in this thread, given the state of many members.[/QUOTE]
I'm just asking because he might be crying while typing that.
[QUOTE=ultra_bright;32797632]Is your spelling usually this bad?[/QUOTE]
No. Its just this goddamn small touch screen on my phone, so i make a lot of spelling mistakes and typos, and cant be arsed to fix them.
[editline]15th October 2011[/editline]
oh and yeah i was kind of sad while typing that too.
[QUOTE=ultra_bright;32797632]I'm depressed because I'm just alone :([/QUOTE]
[img]http://img220.imageshack.us/img220/9049/howaloneyouarent.png[/img]
There's always someone, somewhere.
[QUOTE=Fhenexx;32798589][img]http://img220.imageshack.us/img220/9049/howaloneyouarent.png[/img]
There's always someone, somewhere.[/QUOTE]
Who makes those?
[QUOTE=ultra_bright;32798651]Who makes those?[/QUOTE]
Dunno, but this is the link to the whole comic:
[url]http://www.viruscomix.com/monstrepancies.jpg[/url]
Grr my friend is depressed and self harming\destructive and now she's 20 thousand km away from her family in Germany with me and she tried to get it on with me and I shot her down... she's so fucking fucked up and I denied her a little bit of happiness.
She's really fucked up, way better reasons to be depressed than me (which I am anyway), I'm pretty sure she got drunk and had sex with a 30 year old... she's only 14. She has come close to suicide a lot and run away, cut herself, subjects herself to allergens...
tl;dr: fucked up friend is fucked, help somehow?
[editline]16th October 2011[/editline]
Oh I'm a bit depressed too but that's just teenage angst I'm assuming
if someone feels depressed and wants someone just to chat about shit to, add me on steam, ID is same as my name here
[QUOTE=Fhenexx;32798589][img]http://img220.imageshack.us/img220/9049/howaloneyouarent.png[/img]
There's always someone, somewhere.[/QUOTE]
The fact that other people around you also feel alone doesn't change anything.
[QUOTE=sp00ks;32799113]The fact that other people around you also feel alone doesn't change anything.[/QUOTE]
It changes [i]everything[/i]. Many people are looking for friendship, you just gotta look in the right places.
Sometimes those people can be much closer than you think.
[QUOTE=Fhenexx;32799762]It changes [i]everything[/i]. Many people are looking for friendship, you just gotta look in the right places.
Sometimes those people can be much closer than you think.[/QUOTE]
Indeed, isolated unity is still unity
These pills work wonders, but I feel dead inside.
I guess the tradeoff is worth it.
[QUOTE=Turnips5;32799041]if someone feels depressed and wants someone just to chat about shit to, add me on steam, ID is same as my name here[/QUOTE]
Same here, mines "Taliban69king".
The only thing keeping me from not commiting suicide is the pain I would endure doing it.
Just survived an attempt at suicide a few days ago.
I was drunk off my ass and was looking at a shit load of percosets I bought for a high.
Thought I would end it all because the stress in my life it felt crushing enough to end it.
Took one or two and was teetering on the edge crying then passed out.
Woke up to throw up a bunch got really sick and tired.
At this point I have no idea how I am alive
Trust me guys it's not the way to go.
No matter how much you tell your self your alone, you're not.
Tell someone you're thinking about it. See how they react.
Fuck I was texting to a girl of my interest while doing this.
I've only known her for a few weeks and she was worried sick about me.
The point is, push on, no matter how hard your life looks.
No matter how much your freaking out about something.
No matter how much your financial situation is fucked.
No matter how much you miss your ex.
It's not worth the pain you put your friends and family through.
Not to mention going through the act.
I may be blinded by alcohol but fuck it still hurt.
[QUOTE=Known Havok;32807102]The only thing keeping me from not commiting suicide is the pain I would endure doing it.[/QUOTE]
Think of it this way: Every single action that you do affects the world. If you do even the SLIGHTEST bit of good, over time it will have a chain reaction that positively affects others. Everyone's life has a purpose- something that they do that [I]no one else will ever be able to[/I] that positively affects the planet, and those living on it. It might seem hard now, but we all have rough patches. Just keep calm, and realize that the best is still to come.
[QUOTE=minilandstan;32800738]These pills work wonders, but I feel dead inside.
I guess the tradeoff is worth it.[/QUOTE]
Feeling numb is a side effect of medication, not a good outcome of it. There is likely a different one that will make you feel good without it being a numb good.
It's worth inquiring about with your shrink.
Try helping others, it will make you feel good about yourself.
[QUOTE=Mr. Smartass;32820034]Think of it this way: Every single action that you do affects the world. If you do even the SLIGHTEST bit of good, over time it will have a chain reaction that positively affects others. Everyone's life has a purpose- something that they do that [I]no one else will ever be able to[/I] that positively affects the planet, and those living on it. It might seem hard now, but we all have rough patches. Just keep calm, and realize that [B]the best is still to come.[/B][/QUOTE]
I know you're just trying to help, but you can't know this. Maybe things will just get worse and worse.
I try to come to terms with my self; come to terms with my being in this material world and with the external forces that act upon me. I forge my own path in this world, and I create [URL="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Existentialism"]my own meaning[/URL]. Sadness is simply self-destructive emotion that causes error in my judgement; it is a flaw which I must overcome.
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