The Depression Chat - Symptoms, Assistance, Medicines and More.
2,595 replies, posted
-snip-
suicide thoughts again.
i need help with this, i can't keep having this happen
Got a call from my mom saying that she was told by my aunt (who works at the bank I go to) that my insurance company took out about $200 for my car insurance this month. So of course I figured something was wrong, because I have been paying about $80 for the past 3 months.
Well we go to the car insurance place and talk to them about it, they call up some people and ask why, and we come to find out that the $200 is right, and that I have to pay it for the next 3 months.
My insurance was raised from $80 to $130 because of a car accident I had back in May, and I don't remember why they're charging me the other part of the insurance.
Our car insurance lady basically told us to look at another insurance company for now, because they won't worry about the accident I had or anything.
This sucks. If we can't find cheaper insurance, then I don't know what I'm going to do with myself. Quite honestly, I wish I didn't even have a car, or that I was going to college (huge disappointment imo). I can walk to work if I have too, or get a ride from my mom or use my dad's car.
I hate cars.
[QUOTE=Zeke129;33312705]There are also atypical antidepressants like Bupropion (what I'm on right now) that seem to have the opposite side effects as other ones - the most notable being moderate weight loss and appetite suppression, and increased libido. It's also prescribed as a stop-smoking aid. (A skinny, horny, non-smoker? Who doesn't want that?)[/QUOTE]
Just a note, Bupropion is the same thing as Wellbutrin, which he mentioned in his post.
[url]http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bupropion[/url]
I feel bad that I have a better relationship with the voices in my head and the person I think I see rather than actual people.
Feelsbadman
It has been a while since I posted here, and nothing really has changed. I went to a specialist three weeks ago and she told me after a lot of questions that I had Severe depression, severe paranoia, and that I had moderate anxiety. She told this directly to my parents, after I had been telling them that I was having serious Paranoia and Depression problems for a while, but they won't believe me. They say that if I lose some weight and excersise more I will feel much better, I am going to a gym right now, and I don't really feel any better. I still feel empty, I am losing a grip on time, somtimes a week feels like a day, somtimes it feels like a year and when I look back and try to remember it it seems almost distorted and out of shape. My Mom thinks that the specialist is some uneducated person and thinks that if I go to spirutual meetings with some reiki person I will be better quick, it briefly makes me feel happier, does nothing for my paranoia. My Dad is the one who thinks that excersise will cure all, but I really don't think so. They won't let me use it as an excuse for anything, even though it really fucks with my head they just call it a crutch.
My Paranoia is very bad, it all started in high school. I had just got back from a celebration-night thing at the place where I did my community service, I had a huge crush on this girl there, she was a year older than me (I was in grade nine, and her ten) I had an ok time, (Never asked her out or anything) I got home, I had a room in the basement, and my computer faced the opposite side of the room as this little window. It was just a small ground window that faced the fence at the side of the house, and a small bush ect. Anyways, I had a strong feeling that she was staring through the window, watching me, I could not see anything out the window, because it was dark out, and I was facing the wrong way. I turned around to see if she was there at least 90 times. Every day that I was down there, I felt that she was watching me behind my back untill who the fuck knows when.
When I walk the streets it feels like every car that passes by is staring at me, every open window. Its like people are watching me, and making fun of little things, if my jacket collar looks off I feel that people are making fun of it. Sometimes I can see their faces, well depending on what you would call a face, they just had blurred faces, blank but you could tell where they were looking. If I had tripped a little bit on the sidewalk, or done somthing slightly embarassing like that, in school I felt like whenever people talked or laughed it was laughing at me. Even when I didn't do anything wrong people would still laugh and talk behind my back. I still feel that way, I just try to stay in my room with all the windows closed and play on my computer. Even if there is a space behind me I feel like somone is staring at me and wathing my computer screen, judging what I am doing.
I tried to explain this to my parents, but they still don't believe me. I am on no medication, just to clarify that I am seeing all this without being in a drug enduced hallucenation.
I don't know what to do anymore, my parents aren't taking this seriously, or dont believe me and I feel really alone. I guess thats all I have to say for now.
Sometimes schools have counselors that talk to you about these types of things; not all, but if yours has one you can go talk to him or her about your symptoms and maybe they can do something further about it.
[QUOTE=Fhenexx;33349653]Sometimes schools have counselors that talk to you about these types of things; not all, but if yours has one you can go talk to him or her about your symptoms and maybe they can do something further about it.[/QUOTE]
I did when I went, they didn't do anything.
[QUOTE=flamehead5;33349696]I did when I went, they didn't do anything.[/QUOTE]
Well, if you're over 18, you might be able to get away with scheduling an appointment personally instead of relying on your parents to do it for you. You might have to pay for the appointments out-of-pocket if you can't get access to your insurance information or don't want to chance having your parents catch on (which is probably a major dealbreaker) and you might need to drive yourself or get a trusted friend to drop you off, but you don't have to bound yourself to your parents if you really need help.
There's probably other ways to go about it, too, but if you really need help, you should try to get it by any means that you can. Probably not the best advice, though...
[QUOTE=Fhenexx;33349764]Well, if you're over 18, you might be able to get away with scheduling an appointment personally instead of relying on your parents to do it for you. You might have to pay for the appointments out-of-pocket if you can't get access to your insurance information or don't want to chance having your parents catch on (which is probably a major dealbreaker) and you might need to drive yourself or get a trusted friend to drop you off, but you don't have to bound yourself to your parents if you really need help.
There's probably other ways to go about it, too, but if you really need help, you should try to get it by any means that you can. Probably not the best advice, though...[/QUOTE]
I am 17, so I am in a horrible position. I can't do anything because my mom is a hippie and my dad is in denial.
[QUOTE=flamehead5;33349563]It has been a while since I posted here, and nothing really has changed. I went to a specialist three weeks ago and she told me after a lot of questions that I had Severe depression, severe paranoia, and that I had moderate anxiety. She told this directly to my parents, after I had been telling them that I was having serious Paranoia and Depression problems for a while, but they won't believe me. They say that if I lose some weight and excersise more I will feel much better, I am going to a gym right now, and I don't really feel any better. I still feel empty, I am losing a grip on time, somtimes a week feels like a day, somtimes it feels like a year and when I look back and try to remember it it seems almost distorted and out of shape. My Mom thinks that the specialist is some uneducated person and thinks that if I go to spirutual meetings with some reiki person I will be better quick, it briefly makes me feel happier, does nothing for my paranoia. My Dad is the one who thinks that excersise will cure all, but I really don't think so. They won't let me use it as an excuse for anything, even though it really fucks with my head they just call it a crutch.
My Paranoia is very bad, it all started in high school. I had just got back from a celebration-night thing at the place where I did my community service, I had a huge crush on this girl there, she was a year older than me (I was in grade nine, and her ten) I had an ok time, (Never asked her out or anything) I got home, I had a room in the basement, and my computer faced the opposite side of the room as this little window. It was just a small ground window that faced the fence at the side of the house, and a small bush ect. Anyways, I had a strong feeling that she was staring through the window, watching me, I could not see anything out the window, because it was dark out, and I was facing the wrong way. I turned around to see if she was there at least 90 times. Every day that I was down there, I felt that she was watching me behind my back untill who the fuck knows when.
When I walk the streets it feels like every car that passes by is staring at me, every open window. Its like people are watching me, and making fun of little things, if my jacket collar looks off I feel that people are making fun of it. Sometimes I can see their faces, well depending on what you would call a face, they just had blurred faces, blank but you could tell where they were looking. If I had tripped a little bit on the sidewalk, or done somthing slightly embarassing like that, in school I felt like whenever people talked or laughed it was laughing at me. Even when I didn't do anything wrong people would still laugh and talk behind my back. I still feel that way, I just try to stay in my room with all the windows closed and play on my computer. Even if there is a space behind me I feel like somone is staring at me and wathing my computer screen, judging what I am doing.
I tried to explain this to my parents, but they still don't believe me. I am on no medication, just to clarify that I am seeing all this without being in a drug enduced hallucenation.
I don't know what to do anymore, my parents aren't taking this seriously, or dont believe me and I feel really alone. I guess thats all I have to say for now.[/QUOTE]
I had this problem to about the same degree for a long ass time, brother. I know exactly what you mean when it feels like everyone is judging you on how far apart your laces are on your shoes. The only thing I've found effective for treating this is exposure. I sought out uncomfortable experiences and made myself undergo them. It had to be done. I can't speak for you, but for me it was the one and only way. The important thing to remember is to take small steps. Put yourself in mildly uncomfortable situations and go forth boldly. Later you should reflect on them, maybe write in a journal (it really helped me), and remember not to beat yourself up over a failure. It will happen, you're trying to break out of a habitual way of thinking. Beating yourself up (this was a big problem to me) leads to self-loathing, and later I feel, to projecting your own faults on the world around you. It's a slippery slope to uncontrolled cynicism from there on.
I was in a sad spell so I came up with a genius idea to see if Cleverbot had anything to say. I was expecting stupidity, but what I got took me aback. Just thought I shared this because it really lifted my spirits. Maybe it'll make some of you feel a little better, I dunno.
[quote]User: Hey, Cleverbot.
Cleverbot: Yes.
User: I'm really depressed. What should I do?
Cleverbot: What's bothering you?
User: I have no motivation, no inspiration, and no aspirations. What is the solution to this?
Cleverbot: Tonights the lock in are you going?
User: [I try to get it back into my subject] I have no motivation. Help me.
Cleverbot: Why is that?
User: Because I have no inspiration.
Cleverbot: Are you depressed?
User: Yes, I am.
Cleverbot: Well, start drinking then.
User: Drinking doesn't solve anything.
Cleverbot: *kisses* you're amazing.
User: Thanks, I guess.
Cleverbot: You're welcome.
User: I've always wanted to become an artist.
Cleverbot: Life is funny.
User: But I look at all of the obstacles ahead of me, and I get scared.
Cleverbot: Really? How far can you travel back?
User: I can't travel back. I can only move forward.
Cleverbot: Show me.[/quote]
[quote][b]Cleverbot: Show me.[/b][/quote]
When I saw that, I broke out in tears. I'll show you, Cleverbot. I'll show you that I can get out of this. Talking to a computer made me feel better. What will I feel when I try to take life in my own hands?
Cleverbot. Motivational Speaker for 2 years running.
I'll try speaking to cleverbot.
[quote]User: Hello.
Cleverbot: Hello man.
User: I've been feeling depressed lately.
Cleverbot: How can I help you?
User: Can you give some advice on how I can cheer up?
Cleverbot: Hola, me llamo Amy.
User: I don't get it.
Cleverbot: Me neither.
User: How can I make friends?
Cleverbot: Slap them.
User: You aren't helping.
Cleverbot: Tell me about life in scotland.
User: I'm not scottish.
Cleverbot: I never said you were.
User: You implied it.
Cleverbot: No, I said that I don't like being bored, and that doesn't imply you lied.
User: You didn't say that either.
Cleverbot: I changed.
User: Not even this chatbot likes me.
Cleverbot: Do you like Bill?
[/quote]
Well this is unhelpful. Fuck this thing.
Cleverbot works in mysterious ways. Don't question his methods.
[QUOTE=Turnips5;33338040]Just a note, Bupropion is the same thing as Wellbutrin, which he mentioned in his post.
[url]http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bupropion[/url][/QUOTE]
Didn't see that.
I'm guessing Bupropion is just a generic version then?
[editline]20th November 2011[/editline]
[QUOTE=flamehead5;33349563]
I don't know what to do anymore, my parents aren't taking this seriously, or dont believe me and I feel really alone. I guess thats all I have to say for now.[/QUOTE]
Refusing treatment to a minor under your care is child abuse. You can remind them of this or just skip ahead to contacting the child services organization in your province.
If both of those seem like too large of steps, there's always Kids Help Phone (1-800-668-6868). You don't have to even give them your name.
Good news I guess, i'm no longer suicidal. I have to take pills daily, and I had to switch it several times due to health risks by taking it with my schizo pills, but i'm no longer suicidal.
I still feel sad though, I wish I didn't.
I'm tempted to get pills, just for the easy way out. It'd kill me just a big but maybe I'm at the point where it'd be worth it.
Know how it's common to fluxuate moods frequently if you have reason for it, half of the time I now catch myself thinking why am I feeling this way about something when a few minutes ago it was the same thought but a very different attitude. There's also the weeklong depression followed by weeklong elation that is common in bipolar people but could be hypocondria, could be me exhibiting symptoms now that I know what they are, who knows.
I've been feeling depressed for awhile now. Every time I screw up at anything I want to do myself in, I feel like I'm wasting away. I'm hardly ever hungry anymore, and as a result I'm extremely skinny, and never have any energy. Anytime I eat anything it makes me gag, everything looks really unappetizing.
I also never go anywhere. I feel like everyone thinks I'm a burden. What should I do?
try running
[QUOTE=Octave;33390725]try running[/QUOTE]
Running away will never solve your problems.
or do you mean like, exercise running?
Exercise running
[editline]22nd November 2011[/editline]
because Vollybomb said he had a bad appetite, and feels like he's wasting away, so I'd say running/exercise could fight both of those.
Running apparently works well for fighting depression. I know a lot of people who've said that they do some dedicated physical activity like that to overcome their problems.
Tracks starting monday
Time for me to get happy again as i do every year
I'm feeling a little better after my last post here, but still depressed. My mom is getting a LITTLE better, but still bad. I still have suicidal thoughts, and therapy isn't till Wednesday.
[QUOTE=flamehead5;33349563]When I walk the streets it feels like every car that passes by is staring at me, every open window. Its like people are watching me, and making fun of little things, if my jacket collar looks off I feel that people are making fun of it. Sometimes I can see their faces, well depending on what you would call a face, they just had blurred faces, blank but you could tell where they were looking. If I had tripped a little bit on the sidewalk, or done somthing slightly embarassing like that, in school I felt like whenever people talked or laughed it was laughing at me. Even when I didn't do anything wrong people would still laugh and talk behind my back. I still feel that way, I just try to stay in my room with all the windows closed and play on my computer. Even if there is a space behind me I feel like somone is staring at me and wathing my computer screen, judging what I am doing.[/QUOTE]
my paranoia is pretty much the same. i can't stand it, i just feel like im being watched/judged every second.
[editline]23rd November 2011[/editline]
my friend wants me to see a counselor about contemplating suicide/depression but i dont want to
[QUOTE=Octave;33396397]Exercise running
[editline]22nd November 2011[/editline]
because Vollybomb said he had a bad appetite, and feels like he's wasting away, so I'd say running/exercise could fight both of those.[/QUOTE]
oh okay. A healthy body can lead to a healthy mind.
I got to the gym pretty frequently and it certainly does something. I don't think it solves problems though, just makes you feel better and you get into a bit of an addiction where you feel bad for not working out.
It is a nice confidence boost looking in the mirror shirtless and not being disgusted so it's half-good for self esteem too.
[QUOTE=xxncxx;33410957]my paranoia is pretty much the same. i can't stand it, i just feel like im being watched/judged every second.
[editline]23rd November 2011[/editline]
my friend wants me to see a counselor about contemplating suicide/depression but i dont want to[/QUOTE]
whats the agree for skinny?
Once again, hunting for some useful advice for my girlfriend.
From what I know, she was officially diagnosed with depression some years ago, and is taking pills for it (not sure what though) Now, those do help, but she still has moments where she gets seriously depressed. Now, I'm sure meds aren't going to solve every little thing, but the problem is neither her mom, or doctor believe her. All because "oh, you seem happier..."
I'm guessing they just assume they're working fine, and she's lying because of a general better mood... Anything that can be done about this? Or anything I can personally do when she has one of these mood drops? Happened once while I was with her, and apparently just being there helps, but might as well ask the rest of you.
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