• Maverick's Love/Relationship/Social Advice Megathread
    3,562 replies, posted
There. I don't see what difference it makes but you have names now.
Having no names make it seems like you're not talking about people, but more about objects. We don't give a damn if you use their real names or fake names, none of us know you or these people so their identities aren't compromised.
The difference is you can actually follow the story. "A" just messes with the sentence. Now you get to wait a bit until people are awake for your advice. e. A psychotic ninja.
Makes sense, I didn't really think of it that way. Thanks for some help, I never posted in love advice before or anything when it was still here. I'll check the thread again tomorrow morning.
She could have just changed her mind. Girls tend to do that. Often times, the simple solution is the correct one. It is doubtful that she was talked out of it by friends or whatever, she could have just reassessed the situation and decided that she didn't want to go with you. Maybe a different guy asked her to the prom and she wants to go with him instead. Maybe she wants a different guy to pick her so she needs to stay dateless in order to remain a possible option for him. The bottom line is that she doesn't want to go with you anymore. Why that is doesn't matter as you can't do anything about it. All you can do is hunt for other dates while hoping she changes her mind again.
[QUOTE=BISCUIT_TINS;29574147]I was friends with a girl for a little while and I asked her out. We dated for about 4 months before we decided we were both better off as friends and had a mutual separation sometime in January. We have remained friends. Anyway, along comes Friday and I stayed over at her house with a friend of mine for no reason in particular. Due to lack of space in her room, my friend slept on the floor and I hopped in the bed with her because we were used to being close together. However we were getting a little closer then I had anticipated, and eventually we were 'making out' (I hate that term, along with 'snogging', but anyway...). We fell asleep soon after and I woke up early in the morning as I always do (around 6AM) to her with her arms wrapped around me like a blanket. So my friend goes out to get another friend who got lost somewhere, that's not really important, however it ended up as me and her in her house alone and we 'made out' for a fair amount of time. We went to a barbecue and it was just a normal day after that. After the barbecue I was walking her back to her house and I asked her out again. She got really shy which was unusual for her and said something along the lines of "I'll think about it". She texted me afterwards saying that she'll tell me her answer to my face on tomorrow, in school. I honestly really like this girl, in every way she is perfect for me and I don't want to let her slip away from me. If she says no I don't know how I'll take it, should I pursue even if I get a no? I know that would be the worst thing to do, but I doubt I'll ever meet a girl as great as her. Apologies for a copious amount of text, I haven't told anyone about this yet and it has all just flowed out.[/QUOTE] Yeah you probably shouldn't have 'asked her out' or anything. If she was cool to hook up and whatnot, you should have just went with it and let it develop into its own thing. 'Asking a girl out' in the sense that you're asking her to be your girlfriend is just stupid and childish, and you should just let relationships become relationships instead of 'asking' them into existence. All you really can do now is wait for her answer, and if it's a no you'll just have to accept it and learn from it. You could probably continue to remain physical with her seeing as that's what you were doing beforehand, but it might be awkward now especially for her, because she's going to think you're still crushing on her etc. If that is the case, then you should probably forget about it anyway because if she only wants to hook up with you, you probably like her a lot more than she likes you and you're only going to end up getting disappointed. @deathmog, it's been said in previous posts in the thread but don't worry so much about taking a girl to prom. There's going to be 100s of girls there, some of which won't even have dates, and the ones that do won't end up spending the whole night with their partner. Just go with a bunch of friends, that way you won't be tied down to one specific female for the whole night, and you can go off and hang out with any of the girls there without disappointing your specific date. Also @Taepodong, don't know if you're still reading this thread but if you are, seriously get over yourself. You sound just like I did ~2-3 years ago and trust me when I say that all the replies you've been given are right. The girls aren't at all what they're like on the surface and they are all (well, nearly all) worth getting to know. I used to be just like you, dismissing any relationship or friendship with the opposite sex because they all seemed preppy and stupid, when really I was just trying to justify my own insecurities and social ineptitude. When I finally started to learn how to be confident and talk to people, I became close to a lot of people that I once used to hate on and spend my time bitching about. I still think that many of them are stupid and preppy, because whatever, they are, but that doesn't stop me from talking, having fun, hanging out and/or flirting with them. It's all practice, and it's all worth it.
Darklight how is asking a girl out childish at all, especially if they'd previously gone out. Hooking up with a girl won't develop into some blossoming romance on its own in any case, asking her on a date, especially in the day following, was probably the best possible course of action.
I wasn't talking about asking a girl on a date, I was referring to 'asking her out' to be his girlfriend.
[QUOTE=Dark_Light;29589067]I wasn't talking about asking a girl on a date, I was referring to 'asking her out' to be his girlfriend.[/QUOTE] Well dating someone is a way to get to know them, why would that even be necessary if they've known each other intimately in the past? Besides which, he just said "I asked her out again".
[QUOTE=Mlisen14;29589279]Well dating someone is a way to get to know them, why would that even be necessary if they've known each other intimately in the past? Besides which, he just said "I asked her out again".[/QUOTE] Getting to know someone better isn't the only reason you take a girl on dates. It's to spend time with them alone so as to build attraction and to escalate a physical relationship. Almost half a year has passed since the last time they were close so it's a completely different situation now, and the initial attraction is probably long gone. Dating would be an excellent way to stir up those old feelings and to rebuild the attraction between the two of them, to the point where they become a 'thing'. That isn't even the same point you were initially making though. In your previous post you even said taking her out on a date was the next best course of action, and now you're saying that dating her is unnecessary because they've been intimate in the past and therefore already 'know each other'? It doesn't matter if they were together previously; in no situation whatsoever should you ever 'ask a girl out' as you would in primary school i.e. asking her to be your girlfriend. Asking her out for a date, sure, but from what I gathered from his post, he meant the former. He had no idea how she felt beyond a couple of make outs, and is asking her basically how she feels about him, and if she likes him enough to be his girlfriend. Does that sound right to you? The bottom line is this: Asking a girl to be with you is completely unnatural and puts the girl in an awkward spot in which they have to make a decision based on their emotions at the time. Ideally you should never initiate any conversations like that with a girl you want to be with; you never ask her how she feels about you, you never tell her how you feel, and you never ask her what the two of you are or what the nature of your relationship is. You continue to see her and spend time with her up to the point where you pretty much are 'together', and there is clearly mutual attraction/affection, and only then do you start bringing commitments or expectations into it. Not the other way around.
I was making the point that I personally don't think that it's that weird to ask a girl to get back together with you in that way. In any case it sounds more like he asked her on a date, but I'll leave that up to him to elaborate, I don't want to speculate any further. I think if two people in a relationship end up broken up for a reasonably short amount of time like six months, it's not a childish gesture by any means to make it clear that he wants to relapse. You ask girls on dates to get to know them, not necessarily because you want to be their boyfriend. If he wanted to be upfront about it, then why would he bother with the whole 'let's get to know each other better' thing first, if that's already behind them? I'm not saying that dates have no place in a relationship, either. But dating someone to know them better once you've already been that close just seems like a front for what he obviously wants. I completely understand the being put on the spot thing though, but really there has to be some sort of attraction if she is getting with her recent ex-boyfriend, it doesn't sound like an entirely spontaneous event. [editline]3rd May 2011[/editline] I also think you've got a very closed-minded view of how relationships need to operate. There are varying ways in which people get closer to each other. Some don't even date before it's clear that there's a strong mutual attraction, by which point it's no longer necessary. It kind of sounds like you're saying that anyone that doesn't conform to the very standard way of playing the dating game is automatically childish, but it could just be symbolic of stronger present emotions or whatever. I'm not going to push that point though because it sounds sentimental and horribly unlike my usual cynical approach to this kind of topic.
[QUOTE=ScoutKing;29582011]this is very, very true. Some of the preppy girls can really surprise you. ive been aw-struck by a few of them. I felt really bad that i made first judgement afterwards.[/QUOTE] Yeah this... I had already judged one of the hottest girls in school to be an idiot and would have nothing to do with her. Then she got sat beside me in almost half my classes (they forced alphabetical order for some reason). She tried hard to talk to me and include me in stuff and I just kinda shrugged it off. When she then turned up in my advanced physics/chem/math classes, I was very surprised. She sure as hell didn't come off that smart. Really guys, judging by looks is not a good idea. [QUOTE=Taepodong-2;29582295]I don't think someone who listens to mainstream music is going to have much respect for my music. That's why I give a fuck.[/QUOTE] Your music sucks dick. See how stupid that comment was? I don't even know what you're interested in, and I probably haven't heard it anyway. All I know is you don't like mainstream metal, and I've already made this judgement. Now, compare my retarded judgement to your judgement of the "prep" girls. Notice the similarities. Let me give you a hint: your judgement is retarded. Give the girls a chance... sometimes you'll be very surprised. Granted, often you won't be, but that's life.
[QUOTE=Jo The Shmo;29568402]I do, I have $100 riding on losing my virginity by the end of high school and I want to win it.[/QUOTE] I just realized I had a £50 bet with a friend I would lose mine by the end of this year.
[QUOTE=Dark_Light;29589524]Getting to know someone better isn't the only reason you take a girl on dates. It's to spend time with them alone so as to build attraction and to escalate a physical relationship. Almost half a year has passed since the last time they were close so it's a completely different situation now, and the initial attraction is probably long gone. Dating would be an excellent way to stir up those old feelings and to rebuild the attraction between the two of them, to the point where they become a 'thing'. That isn't even the same point you were initially making though. In your previous post you even said taking her out on a date was the next best course of action, and now you're saying that dating her is unnecessary because they've been intimate in the past and therefore already 'know each other'? It doesn't matter if they were together previously; in no situation whatsoever should you ever 'ask a girl out' as you would in primary school i.e. asking her to be your girlfriend. Asking her out for a date, sure, but from what I gathered from his post, he meant the former. He had no idea how she felt beyond a couple of make outs, and is asking her basically how she feels about him, and if she likes him enough to be his girlfriend. Does that sound right to you? The bottom line is this: Asking a girl to be with you is completely unnatural and puts the girl in an awkward spot in which they have to make a decision based on their emotions at the time. Ideally you should never initiate any conversations like that with a girl you want to be with; you never ask her how she feels about you, you never tell her how you feel, and you never ask her what the two of you are or what the nature of your relationship is. You continue to see her and spend time with her up to the point where you pretty much are 'together', and there is clearly mutual attraction/affection, and only then do you start bringing commitments or expectations into it. Not the other way around.[/QUOTE] If they had broken up a while ago it is in no way childish to let her know that he's interested again. After a breakup there's a little bit of ambiguity and awkwardness and it's easier to just be up front, especially because you [i]have[/i] been more intimate in the past. You don't have to do it that way, but there's nothing wrong with it.
[QUOTE=Mlisen14;29588823]Darklight how is asking a girl out childish at all, especially if they'd previously gone out. Hooking up with a girl won't develop into some blossoming romance on its own in any case, asking her on a date, especially in the day following, was probably the best possible course of action.[/QUOTE] I don't get how anyone would ask someone to be their girlfriend, doesn't work.
It works when you've already been together. You sit down and have a serious discussion about getting back together. It doesn't really work any other times.
I've asked a girl whose acquainted with my male friend and I at the same time if we could work afterschool on this project. If the girl rejects saying that she doesn't like working in a group, would this be rejection? I'm really leaning on the rejection part.
Well considering you didn't ask her out, it's not really rejection. But if she was interested she would have said yes, so yeah.
What is the best way to convince a bitch that these are the closing days of the apocalypse and we should fuck with all her friends?
[QUOTE=THEMikeDurham;29601548]What is the best way to convince a bitch that these are the closing days of the apocalypse and we should fuck with all her friends?[/QUOTE] cum between her tits and play CSS
[QUOTE=thisispain;29602157]cum between her tits and play CSS[/QUOTE] Preferably at the same time.
he was bragging about it before seems like a good plan if you ask me
No CSS is for after sex, if you're a total baddass
Oh is that what they're calling nerds now?
Some I'm-not-sure-if-she's-attractive-because-of-obscure-facebook-images is IMing me on facebook and just told me she's "bored of finding a boyfriend". Like, she opened up a coversation like that on facebook. Oh well, if I dont like where things are going Ill tell im not interested because I just got out of a relationship.
Sounds like a real keeper!
I don't understand why people judge people based on music anyway.. Like if I had to choose between Preppy girl with a nice ass and tits that listened to JBieber and some not so attractive girl who's onto the same stuff as me I'd go with nice tittied girl. [editline]3rd May 2011[/editline] Not saying that's all I judge girls by of course.
What music they listen to says something about their intelligence level, that's why.
No it doesn't..
[QUOTE=Mop;29604915]No it doesn't..[/QUOTE] I agree, it probably has more insight into their personality than it does their intelligence level. But for Christ sakes. [b]THE MUSIC SOMEONE LISTENS TO SHOULDN'T FUCKING MATTER IN A RELATIONSHIP.[/b] An example of something similar, my two friends are dating, the dude's a pretty religious guy and the chick is quite an athiest. They have arguments about that sometimes, but they've still been dating for well over a year. Ain't about what the other party's into, as long as they're into you.
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