[QUOTE=Jonii;28266773]And that's actually a way of thinking that goes around now for some reason. In recent years, "dating" has been renamed "hanging out" a lot in some places, and "asking someone out" means "asking to be a steady boy/girlfriend," which just leaves both people with mixed messages.
Guys are too shy to man up and ask a girl out on a regular date, and a lot of girls don't have the lady balls to flirt since it's just "hanging out." Even when they do, it tends to leave shy guys with what they see as mixed messages, which freaks them out more. I was like this for a long time, but recently I've become the only guy I know in my high school that actual goes out on official "dates" and calls them "dates."
When you guys learn to stop thinking and just ask as I figured out myself and as Maverick has always said anyway, and you just take dates as casual days to get to know someone better, it can actually eliminate your awkwardness and anxiety over dating before long like it did mine. Now I take a date as a nothing-guarenteed fun thing. If we have fun and it works well, we go on a second date, and if she doesn't want one, she doesn't want one.[/QUOTE]
Actually I had a discussion with some friends a few months back about how no one seems to date anymore. They just seem to hang out.
My girlfriend cheated on me, and told me about it that she felt terrible. We broke up and decided that we should take some time apart before we can even be friends, but I really miss her. Everyone says I shouldn't take her back, but I still kind of want a relationship, even though I know it would end badly.
Don't take her back. She'll cheat on you again.
[QUOTE=Morbo!!!;28268326]I don't know any fucking girls worth trying for, I've decided. I've been thinking about the same girl for too long and it's pretty ridiculous, since I've fucked up every chance I've had with her. There had been a time but it went ages ago and moving on has been the hardest thing for me.
I asked out one girl when I tried to move on, got rejected, didn't feel too bad about that but we're barely what you'd call friends because of it. But then it was back to thinking about that same person and that's obviously done no good for me. I blame the facts that 1: I'm horribly unmotivated about everything and 2: everybody else is either too good a friend, ugly, too old/young, a slag or has so much competition for them that it's not even worth the effort (or any combination of the five).
also my lack of good looks and charisma don't help[/QUOTE]
You have low self confidence as evident by you pointing out that you have no social skills.
Yet you still have a pretty high standards for dating, which is odd amongst people with low self confidence.
I suggest you go talk to a few of those girls with too much competition, not exactly looking to date, but more to expand your interests in women. I'm sure you'll find one that you find attractive enough, and then you can ask her out.
[QUOTE=MaverickIB;28267777]
The point is to not worry about saying something slick or whatever. Just go up to her and be yourself. Relax. Don't worry about impressing her or whatever, just talk to her like you'd talk to a normal person.[/QUOTE]
works for me
a lot of my conversations used to start with "hey baby ever read story of the eye?"
[QUOTE=Jo The Shmo;28269052]You have low self confidence as evident by you pointing out that you have no social skills.
Yet you still have a pretty high standards for dating, which is odd amongst people with low self confidence.
I suggest you go talk to a few of those girls with too much competition, not exactly looking to date, but more to expand your interests in women. I'm sure you'll find one that you find attractive enough, and then you can ask her out.[/QUOTE]
I probably misrepresented myself. Don't get me wrong, I'm a sociable person and do have a lot of friends, male and female (You're right about the low self confidence, I could write a list of reasons for that - I'm too self critical which is a bit of an ironic statement). I wouldn't describe myself as socially inept because I get on with just about every single person I meet. For one reason or another, I'm just bad at making friends with girls who are to "my standard" because I just turn into a boring cunt when I'm talking to them since I don't know what to say. The people who know me know me for being an eccentric bugger, but that will obviously push someone more normal away so the only alternative is to act as plain as a cup of tea. Also, when I'm around a mixed group of friends, the guys will be talking to me but most of the time, but unless I know them well (And in some cases irrespective of whether I know them), girls don't pay me any attention, due probably to the aforementioned bad looks I have - That's self-depreciating humour but lacking the humour part. I know I'm not horribly ugly but I don't see myself as anything special. Edit: I retract my previous statement (not completely) in saying that I wouldn't consider myself socially inept for that reason; The fault probably lies with me since I just don't bother talking to girls who won't talk to me first. I think that's one major problem for me too, I'm too afraid of rejection if I'm actually attracted to someone.
I do acknowledge that I have overly-high standards for who people perceive me as, but it's because I don't want to waste my time on someone I don't think I'd be happy with - why settle for something you don't want?
I realised that if I'd entered a relationship with the girl I actually asked out (After I'd had a few pints since I'm usually a pussy about this sort of thing) I would've regretted it, and probably done something to fuck it up regardless despite thinking otherwise before. Maybe it wasn't so much a realisation as bitterness manifesting itsself as something less hostile. Or maybe it was the fact that since the day I'd met her I was wanting a relationship out of her and nothing more, but being as awkward as I am in that sort of situation it obviously didn't happen.
I've had the odd chance here and there presented to me to just go shag some randomer but something inside me doesn't let me (As well as the fact that I don't carry around condoms :v: ), and I've been flirted with and asked out by a number too; None of them appealed to me. Perfectly good friends in most cases, but not relationship material in my eyes.
Anyway I got a bit off track again, but I didn't think to do what you told me. Sounds like a good idea since I know a good few of that sort of person, but they're also my friends and I don't want to compromise that as I have done a couple of times. I know that that's been gone over in the OP. I'm good at listening to advice but putting it into practice is the hardest part if you ask me.
Anyway fuck this hype, I've drank too much and had fuck all to eat all day, I'm getting a munch and going to bed. I shall return in the morning to face Mav's bollocking for (probably) being the exact type of person he doesn't want anyone to be despite all the effort he put into the op :v:
holy shit that was a bit overly poetic and I didn't even realise, awesome
[QUOTE=MaverickIB;28263359]Oh yeah, fat neckbeard city over here.
[img_thumb]http://c3.ac-images.myspacecdn.com/images02/95/l_ce66f36f3aef40a4a1162bb7b98e218a.jpg[/img_thumb]
My face whenever people get jelly.[/QUOTE]
:fh:
I lurked the LA a lot and I lurk this thread. But Maverick or anyone else can you offer help? This girl has just been recently talking to me and giving me hugs and doing my work for me in class. Then today another girl walked up to me and told me the first girl liked me. I don't even know the girl that well, so I didn't ask her out. On Facebook I asked her if she liked me and she said no, but she said if I asked her out what would I say. And when I said idk she made a frown smiley. Does she really like me and is playing hard to get, or is she just friendly? What do?
You're stupid for asking if she likes you.
Probably doesn't like you. Just friendly.
[QUOTE=MaverickIB;28270215]You're stupid for asking if she likes you.
Probably doesn't like you. Just friendly.[/QUOTE]
I know..... But she is constantly smiling at me. Should I just avoid her and leave it alone?
Smiling doesn't mean jack shit. You don't have to ignore her, just stop trying to make advances on her. The ball is in her court now.
Bloody hell, there's no particular 'wanna go out' vs 'wanna hang out' in russian that I know of.
[QUOTE=lexus04;28270390]Bloody hell, there's no particular 'wanna go out' vs 'wanna hang out' in russian that I know of.[/QUOTE]
Hang out: PLEASE JOIN ME FOR SHOT OF VODKA COMRADE
Go out: PLEASE JOIN ME FOR SHOT OF VODKA COMRADE SO THAT WE MAY SOMEDAY EXPERIENCE LOVE AND PROCREATE FOR GREAT NATION OF RUSSIA
Oh god I just realized something. I have no idea how old this girl is.
Please be younger than 18.
[editline]24th February 2011[/editline]
[QUOTE=Da Fat Cat v3;28271149]Hang out: PLEASE JOIN ME FOR SHOT OF VODKA COMRADE
Go out: PLEASE JOIN ME FOR SHOT OF VODKA COMRADE SO THAT WE MAY SOMEDAY EXPERIENCE LOVE AND PROCREATE FOR GREAT NATION OF RUSSIA[/QUOTE]
I read it in Reznov's voice.
[QUOTE=lexus04;28270390]Bloody hell, there's no particular 'wanna go out' vs 'wanna hang out' in russian that I know of.[/QUOTE]Yes there is, it just depends on what you want to do
Damn, there's this really cute girl that I have a lot in common with, but we don't have any classes together... so I can't even ask her out.
oh well
[QUOTE=Nachoman17;28271292]Damn, there's this really cute girl that I have a lot in common with, but we don't have any classes together... so I can't even ask her out.
oh well[/QUOTE]
Halls between classes exist for a reason.
[QUOTE=MaverickIB;28270368]Smiling doesn't mean jack shit.[/QUOTE]
I respectfully disagree, no two girls are the same. For most, smiling doesn't mean anything. However, a very introverted girl (like my ex) might smile at you to say "hey, I think you're cute, I want you to talk to me sometime."
[QUOTE=Big Ben;28271345]Halls between classes exist for a reason.[/QUOTE]
Well yes, but I haven't seen her in ages. Don't quite know what happened.
If I do ask her out though, I'll probably get rejected, and then laughed at by my peers. Something I can't really deal with now.
[QUOTE=Big Ben;28271345]Halls between classes exist for a reason.[/QUOTE]
Yep.
Hallways are definitely there to help you talk to girls, not to move between classes.
[QUOTE=WastedJamacan;28271359]I respectfully disagree, no two girls are the same. For most, smiling doesn't mean anything. However, a very introverted girl (like my ex) might smile at you to say "hey, I think you're cute, I want you to talk to me sometime."[/QUOTE]
Yeah, but the girl has already turned him down. Therefore, the smiles don't mean shit.
[QUOTE=Nachoman17;28271373]Well yes, but I haven't seen her in ages. Don't quite know what happened.
If I do ask her out though, I'll probably get rejected, and then laughed at by my peers. Something I can't really deal with now.[/QUOTE]
grow a pair heh
[QUOTE=MaverickIB;28271383]Yeah, but the girl has already turned him down. Therefore, the smiles don't mean shit.[/QUOTE]
Ah, I missed that part.
[QUOTE=Nachoman17;28271373]Well yes, but I haven't seen her in ages. Don't quite know what happened.
If I do ask her out though, I'll probably get rejected, and then laughed at by my peers. Something I can't really deal with now.[/QUOTE]
You can deal with being laughed at by your peers, because anyone who laughs at you because of that is a complete loser.
[QUOTE=thisispain;28271385]grow a pair heh[/QUOTE]
Had a feeling you'd say that.
[QUOTE=Nachoman17;28271424]Had a feeling you'd say that.[/QUOTE]
if you wanna do something you shouldn't worry about the consequences, JUST DO IT
[QUOTE=Nachoman17;28271373]Well yes, but I haven't seen her in ages. Don't quite know what happened.
If I do ask her out though, I'll probably get rejected, and then laughed at by my peers. Something I can't really deal with now.[/QUOTE]
Having peers is for squares.
I have a problem and the advice in this thread is helpful. Right now that I have praised the thread on with my problem. Forenote so I don't confuse anyone I only ask out a girl in person.
There is this girl I want to ask out however the only way I have to contact her is through facebook however she is never online in the chat. I don't want to send a message mainly because I find that odd however I thought the best course of action is to ask here. I do know people who know her however the only one I know is too busy dating my friend to help me it seems.
Apparently it's beyond strange for me to be wanting to ask a black girl out because I'm from Louisiana, one of the most racist states ever.
News flash asshole who said this, not everyone is a bad person who hates other races. :colbert:
[QUOTE=Big Ben;28271526]Apparently it's beyond strange for me to be wanting to ask a black girl out because I'm from Louisiana, one of the most racist states ever.
News flash asshole who said this, not everyone is a bad person who hates other races. :colbert:[/QUOTE]
take it up to zzzZZZ
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