No, but regardless, a group would be useless. It's far enough of a stretch to hope kids post their problems here instead of making threads for them in GD, do you really think anyone is going to actively search for the LA group just to post their problem?
Nope. This is as good as it's going to get for now.
Wanna hear a funny story?
After roughly five months of dating, my girlfriend confronted me on how I was still reserved around her. She said that I was so much more open around my friends (most of whom I've known for the better part of a decade) than I was around her and she didn't know why. I lol'd.
But yeah, a month isn't shit, man.
I think people tend to be more reserved around their partners in general.
I mean, I'm completely comfortable around the girl I'm dating, but I'm still not all crazy and shit around her like I am around my friends. Can't really explain why, that's just the way things are.
Still, it's a nice group for the people that were regulars there.
We've been dating for 10 months now, and she still gets upset with me because I apparently never open up to her. I mean, she has no problem listing off every fucking thing that went through her head on any given day, but I'm not like that, and she doesn't understand why.
I've got pretty significant trust issues, and I'm not a big fan of letting people in. It just isn't how I do things, and I dunno how I would change that, or if I even want to. I'm like a fucking security vault, and that's just the way I do things.
The problem is that I'm just too good at reading a person's reaction. I can tell exactly how someone feels about something I've said. If I've said something that you find stupid, inane, etc, it will be pretty much impossible for you to hide that from me. It makes socializing difficult, as I constantly analyze every aspect of the conversation.
I feel like a sociopath from time to time. Socializing just seems like a chore to me, something I have to do every now and then to establish my presence, but not something I ever feel compelled to do. It is very strange...
[QUOTE=MaverickIB;28240035]I think people tend to be more reserved around their partners in general.
I mean, I'm completely comfortable around the girl I'm dating, but I'm still not all crazy and shit around her like I am around my friends. Can't really explain why, that's just the way things are.[/QUOTE]
I think it just has to do with trying to act our best. I mean i've had a 5-month relationship before and while I was completely comfortable, I still didn't act crazy as usual.
But that's the thing, I don't try to act my best around her or anything. I suppose she just doesn't bring out the crazy side of my like my friends do. I mean, when she's around my friends, I'm crazy and whatnot even though she's right there.
It's definitely something I don't fully understand, unlike a lot of aspects involving girls.
Worst part about it is that we can't flame people anymore for their stupid posts.
Is it possible to love someone through friendship?
How do I get to know a girl or that if I am rather unable to.. The only time I could would be during class but it would be incredibly awkward considering she sits several metres from me.
My situation is due to officially going to some special school I also go to the normal school next door to do other classes but I don't have breaks or lunch or anything there, leaving and arriving just as class begins or ends.
Hi LA. I will always miss you.
Maybe LA should set up a tinychat or something which all FP members can come to for advice.
[QUOTE=MaverickIB;28238094]Taking advice from girls is a terrible idea.
Girls will tell you that writing a note and/or telling a girl you've always loved her is cute/whatever.
The bottom line is that girls think that shit is cute until it happens to them, which is when they find it creepy. In reality, they just want guys that look like Brad Pitt doing crap like that for them. It's okay to take a girl's input on problems you're having and whatnot, but you should take it with a grain of salt. Girls have a habit of living in fantasy worlds, they say they want guys outside their window holding a stereo, but when that really happens, they call the police.[/QUOTE]
I have never once had bad advice from a girl, though all the girls I have had advice from have been dating someone.
Maverick has it right though you're gonna get rejected a lot.
Our kingdoms have crumbled, Mav.
[QUOTE=Sobotnik;28241931]How do I get to know a girl or that if I am rather unable to.. The only time I could would be during class but it would be incredibly awkward considering she sits several metres from me.
My situation is due to officially going to some special school I also go to the normal school next door to do other classes but I don't have breaks or lunch or anything there, leaving and arriving just as class begins or ends.[/QUOTE]
Just say hi and get to know her :buddy: You could start off saying that you need help in the class and wonder if you can call her later for help. Something simple like that should be a good starting point.
[QUOTE=Sobotnik;28241931]How do I get to know a girl or that if I am rather unable to.. The only time I could would be during class but it would be incredibly awkward considering she sits several metres from me.
My situation is due to officially going to some special school I also go to the normal school next door to do other classes but I don't have breaks or lunch or anything there, leaving and arriving just as class begins or ends.[/QUOTE]
Opportunities rarely just happen, you have to make them.
Find a way to catch up with her after class or something. Move to a closer seat. The chance to talk to her isn't going to just fall into your lap, you need to make it.
Also, circumstances will never be perfect. You're not going to magically catch her when nobody else is around and you have all of the time in the world. Encounters are only as awkward as you make them, it all depends on you and how you behave.
Here's what I would do in your situation. You don't have to do this or whatever, but it gives you an idea on what I mean by making an opportunity.
I'd write my name and number down on a scrap of paper during class. When class ends and everyone gets up to leave, I'd approach her and say, "Hey, what's your name? I'm [your name here]." (I'm assuming you don't know her name) When she tells me her name, I'd hand her the piece of paper as I say, "Well [her name], you look like someone I'd like to get to know better, you should text/call me sometime." Then I'd wink/smile and walk away before she can really formulate a response.
What this does is put the ball in her court and make your job easy. From then on, all you have to do is wait. If she never calls/texts you, then she's not interested. If she does, you chit chat a little bit, then ask her out. One of the good things about this approach is that it is unorthodox, which makes your chances of her remembering you much higher. Leaving before she can respond produces a feeling of mystery about you, she'll want to call/text you to find out who the hell you are and why your balls are so big, if for not other reason.
[QUOTE=MaverickIB;28242976] approach is that it is unorthodox, which makes your chances of her remembering you much higher. Leaving before she can respond produces a feeling of mystery about you, she'll want to call/text you to find out who the hell you are and why your balls are so big, if for not other reason.[/QUOTE]
The doctor said it was normal. :smith:
[editline]23rd February 2011[/editline]
Would dating a girl all of my friends are also friends with be awkward for the parties involved
Not at all, as long as you guys aren't sucking on each other's faces the entire time you're around said mutual friends.
foiled again
Thank God we still have the love advice thread. I'm was hoping it'll get adoppted by Gd. Thanks maverick.
maverick can i hire you to work for me like all the time
to dish out advice whenever i need it
i get a lot of love problems bro
what.. LA closed..
:(
how am i going to watch LV and maverick fight now?
I met a girl on the train home today, we share similar musical tastes, which got us into conversation but it was only for 10-20 minutes tops while our friends where around me, but I did get her number and facebook.
I would like to try to start dating her as she lives in a place far away enough that if things go pear shaped (which with me is quite likely) that I'm not likely to see her but close enough to be able to see each other reasonably well. She didn't seem particularly interested in me any more than a friend so I'm asking if there is anything I really shouldn't do when starting conversation with her? Any good ideas for starting conversation.
I think this thread won't get used as much for actual love advice as the one in the sub-forum as it's open for all of GD to see, whereas in the sub-forum is usually only got noticed by the advice-giving guys who usually go there.
Shame it got closed. Great OP though Maverick.
[QUOTE=ConvolutedLogic;28239916]Maverick, someone told you about the love advice group, right?
[editline]23rd February 2011[/editline]
If it's not already (I don't have time to check) you should add this to the OP for people who want responses to their problems:
[URL]http://www.facepunch.com/group.php?groupid=2226[/URL][/QUOTE]
I've been doing some testing, posts in the group don't even leave notifications, AND I can't make anyone else an admin. These limitations really limit the group's usefulness. I think it's primary use will really be just a more private thing for the LA regulars.
[QUOTE=Anubis678;28240101]We've been dating for 10 months now, and she still gets upset with me because I apparently never open up to her. I mean, she has no problem listing off every fucking thing that went through her head on any given day, but I'm not like that, and she doesn't understand why.
I've got pretty significant trust issues, and I'm not a big fan of letting people in. It just isn't how I do things, and I dunno how I would change that, or if I even want to. I'm like a fucking security vault, and that's just the way I do things.
The problem is that I'm just too good at reading a person's reaction. I can tell exactly how someone feels about something I've said. If I've said something that you find stupid, inane, etc, it will be pretty much impossible for you to hide that from me. It makes socializing difficult, as I constantly analyze every aspect of the conversation.
I feel like a sociopath from time to time. Socializing just seems like a chore to me, something I have to do every now and then to establish my presence, but not something I ever feel compelled to do. It is very strange...[/QUOTE]
You don't know true love until you can be vulnerable in front of someone and you trust them completely.
I'm not saying cry like a baby every time you see her, (not that you would) what I'm saying is sometimes you will be vulnerable in front of her, and rather than wall up you should let her in.
Point out the relatively obvious, I have mild aspergers.
Edit: Fuck I'm not used to the LA being so active.
[img]http://im.rediff.com/movies/2010/jul/02slid1.jpg[/img]
Roger Goose, I see the girl, switching to missiles.
[QUOTE=Kingy_who;28243749]I met a girl on the train home today, we share similar musical tastes, which got us into conversation but it was only for 10-20 minutes tops while our friends where around me, but I did get her number and facebook.
I would like to try to start dating her as she lives in a place far away enough that if things go pear shaped (which with me is quite likely) that I'm not likely to see her but close enough to be able to see each other reasonably well. She didn't seem particularly interested in me any more than a friend so I'm asking if there is anything I really shouldn't do when starting conversation with her? Any good ideas for starting conversation.[/QUOTE]
Just talk with her a bit more and ask her out on a date when you feel comfortable doing so.
[QUOTE=Foghorn;28243727]maverick can i hire you to work for me like all the time
to dish out advice whenever i need it
i get a lot of love problems bro[/QUOTE]
Only if you pay me.
And by pay I mean sexual favors.
And by sexual favors I mean my pee-pee in ur butthole.
[QUOTE=MaverickIB;28243797]Just talk with her a bit more and ask her out on a date when you feel comfortable doing so.[/QUOTE]
Thanks, This really is a situation where I could end up looking like a strange stalker, But I have some excuses up my sleeve.
I know this is the love thread but I'm wondering something, should we add something to the OP about how to deal with break ups? It might help people a lot if they had guidelines on what NOT to do when the shit hits the fan.
[QUOTE=knifer21;28243954]I know this is the love thread but I'm wondering something, should we add something to the OP about how to deal with break ups? It might help people a lot if they had guidelines on what NOT to do when the shit hits the fan.[/QUOTE]
I wonder if the breakup guide in LA was saved, otherwise it may be a bitch to retype.
Maybe google has it in cache
Sorry, you need to Log In to post a reply to this thread.