Line your ass with cat treats then sit on him when he tries to eat it.
[QUOTE=z0rz;20139825]Doesn't work on my cat, it seems to turn him on when I smack him, because then he just attempts to hump me faster than before.[/QUOTE]
Good lord! Your cat has issues. Maybe the water spritz is your best bet.
get another cat for your current cat to have his way with....
and hope that it doesn't turn into a menage a trois.
Have you ever had a sex act with a cat
/ Chris Hansen
sleep in the nude
[QUOTE=z0rz;20139825]Doesn't work on my cat, it seems to turn him on when I smack him, because then he just attempts to hump me faster than before.[/QUOTE]
I have bad news for you.
Your cat is into BDSM.
[QUOTE=Im Crimson;20138374]Keep a spray bottle of water next to your bed, and when he starts humping you, give him a small [b]shower in the face[/b].[/QUOTE]
With your semen of course
[QUOTE=the_shiggernaut;20139153]At least it's not a dog. Like..a German Shepard..that wouldn't be to nice...
My aunt had a poodle...thing...and every time I went over to her house...well...you know. Cat's are easier to deal with. They aren't as persistent. [b]Just do something to shock them into never doing it again.[/b] Like smack it upside the head. After you do that...it might never do it again.[/QUOTE]
Like using a tazer?
[img]http://i49.tinypic.com/b51f04.jpg[/img]
:science:
[QUOTE=RedNick27;20140639]Like using a tazer?
[img]http://i49.tinypic.com/b51f04.jpg[/img]
:science:[/QUOTE]
Yea. Exactly.
Wait, does that mean your cat is into bestiality?
Get it another cat to rape.
Train him to suck you off.
WTF is with all these "crazy but not particularly funny story is made funny by crude MS Paint pic, then people do the story from other POVs" threads?
Put it under a laundry basket when you sleep.
It's going higher right? One day he'll rape your face. You don't have much time.
The thread name scared me.
[QUOTE=smurfy;20141032]WTF is with all these "crazy but not particularly funny story is made funny by crude MS Paint pic, then people do the story from other POVs" threads?[/QUOTE]I dunno man I thought the cat fucking bit was pretty unique.
I though this thread was about you having sex with a cat.
I think your cat is asking for something, don't you? Now it just comes down to whether or not you're gonna give em head or not.
Your cat is trying to make you his bitch.
I'm being serious here, it's natural for any male animal to exert dominance over not just territory and mates but as well as over other animals. In your case, you are no exception to your cat's message of "I rape you so I own you."
So watch out, he might be aiming for your mouth as a final blow!
get him a lady cat
a cat is fine too
[QUOTE=Max of S2D;20136552][quote]Get him a cat-shaped fuck cushion[/quote]
Best solution, it stopped my very own cat to stop trying to having an offspring with my leg[/QUOTE]
You can actually get those?
what is the world coming to
[QUOTE=Peaness;20136513]Lock your bedroom door?[/QUOTE]
Do cats have hands so that they can even open the door in the first place? Just shut the damn door.
Cats have a horrible feeling tounge so any sexual endeavours from that orifice would be less than favourable. Enter the back side its your only hope!
Don't sleep with your mouth opened like that, the cat could take advantage of that...
Looks like you're fucking moaning in that picture.
You should let him fuck you every night and he will get tired of it. :q:
[QUOTE=knutmora;20142546]You should let him fuck you every night and he will get tired of it. :q:[/QUOTE]
He technically does that already, except he never gets tired of it, always coming back for more.
